Justine hadn't felt right for nearly a week.
Going down to the main office of the university, she decided to take a leave of absence until further notice. Her father agreed this was for the best, and wanted her to take her time, truly getting over what happened. Justine couldn't face the look she was receiving whenever she went into class or walked across campus. More than enough people, including teachers kept trying to approach her, asking what had happened, including friends of the members of the A.C.T accident. Kaycee as always told them to fuck off, and pulled her away. When Thanksgiving week came, her father sent a town car to pick the two of them up. Together they rode, with Kaycee telling her they were going to have the best week ever. To forget about all the basic bullshit, and just relax. Kaycee's family weren't close and were originally from Texas. Sitting beside her watching upstate New York foliage unfold. Three days ago she had gone up to where Lars' dorm was. Most of the students were gone, off on holiday. The few that were still around were in the main TV room downstairs shooting pool. Bundled up in her jacket and scarf, Justine kept her head low before glancing quickly glancing on the bulletin board. There she saw his last name along with a room number. Hurrying up the stairs, she reached the third floor, before going down a narrow hallway.
Passing several guys who didn't give her a second glance. Finally reaching the door, she hesitated, hoping if there was a roommate they wouldn't be in. Opening the door, the knob turned, and she entered, praying she wasn't about to walk in on somebody. Instead the door opened, revealing the room. One side was still crammed with stuff, most likely from the other roommate. It was typical guy in his early 20's messy, laundry everywhere, bed unmade, posters, and a desk completely cluttered. Walking in, she looked around with her wide green eyes before looking over at what she guessed had been his side. There were two dressers, a bed stripped down to the mattress, and a bare desk. Walking in, she saw three boxes with GoodWill written on the side of them. She guessed his mother had cleared the place out and whatever was left behind was supposed to be donated. Walking, she sat down on the edge of the bed and looked around. Thinking of him, she couldn't believe it.
Daniel, Samantha, Amy, Jonah, and Lars were gone.
Reaching, she opened the first box and saw it was mostly stuffed with text books. Sighing, she reached for the other undoing the flaps, and reached in pulling out a plaid red button down shirt. Frowning, she brought it up to her face and deeply inhaled. It strangely smelled like him. Instantly she remembered sitting next to him at dinner the night before they went out to protest. Feeling horrible, she grabbed the shirt, got up and left in a hurry, scared she might run straight into somebody at any second. When she came back to her dorm, she sat down on her bed and shoved the shirt and photo she got from his mother into her bag she was packing to take home. Strangely it brought her a weird sense of comfort. Once she was back home for the week, she saw how hard her father was trying to make up for lost time. He had hired a private cook to prepare dinner for the three of them, and had gotten Linda, their old house keeper to decorate the entire house including a beautiful Christmas tree in the living room. Still, shortly after Justine and Kaycee arrived, dropping their bags off in the foyer, her father greeted them with a sad smile.
"Justine I'm so sorry but I'm being called out to a meeting?"
"Today?"
"Just for a few hours, I promise I'll be here tomorrow and we'll all sit down to a nice dinner. I swear."
Frowning, Justine knew not to complain. She couldn't help that her father was a busy man, with other commitments. He had been wonderful ever since she returned to the states, and knew that she could count herself lucky that he would be home with her tomorrow for the actually holiday. Still, days like this didn't seem the same since he mother died. Nevertheless she would make the best of it, knowing how lucky she really was, and attempt in celebrating the week, even though just a month or so ago she was thrown into a complete nightmare in which she nearly lost her life. This holiday there were many families not being able to celebrate or enjoy since one of their loved ones were gone. Thinking of Judy, Lars' mother all alone truly depressed her. She would give anything to see these strangers again, the people she didn't know very long, but protected her, and stayed by her side until the very end. Thinking of Lars and how much it hurt to feel him moving inside of her.
After Daniel and herself were captured, she awoke to find herself strapped down naked listing to Daniel's screams. She squirmed and cried, legs strapped wide open as they painted her. Finally when the awful woman with the claw came, she froze as she looked between her legs. Nudging one of the other women. Both stared digested and puzzled down at her. That's when Justine knew, they didn't want to cut her. She was un pure, they somehow knew she wasn't a virgin. Lars had indeed saved her. Moments later noises came and they left her. That's when the little boy helped her escape. After her father left, Kaycee raided the liquor cabinet and poured her a glass as the two settled down in the pallor. "Here's to another fucked up year." Justine sadly smirked and took the glass. Tossing back the shot, Justine insatiately felt her throat burn and her stomach toss. Whatever flu she was getting over didn't seem to want to let up. In fact nearly every morning so far she woke up with terrible headaches, and an aching back. Her stomach had been upset, and twice she has vomited. Part of her worried that maybe the shock of what had happened was slowly settling in, and maybe just maybe she had caught something while being exposed to that jungle. Maybe some kind of stomach worm, or even worse. The very idea of this made Justine shiver as she curled up on one of the sofas and looked across at Kaycee sadly.
"You were right, I shouldn't have ever gone…"
Feeling suddenly overwhelmed with emotion and grief, the last few years came crashing down on Justine. First her world was turned upside down with the loss of her mother, and finally when she felt as if she was moving on, picking up the pieces and finally trying to enjoy her life this happened. How could she have been so foolish? She hated to admit it, but having a crush on Alejandro was the main reason why she even joined that stupid group. For weeks she had been watching him from afar, interested and curious wondering more and more about him. She knew she should have listened to Kaycee, something wasn't right with him. It had all been a plant the moment she opened up her mouth in class about her father after learning about FGM. Even poor Jonah had been a pawn in this sick game, all setting up to stage that stupid photo shoot for publicity.
Thinking back at how fast everything had happened. Having the gun put to her head, feeling completely helpless and terrified among strangers, knowing how foolish she had been, and how for just mere seconds before the plane crashed looking down at that vast never ending jungle feeling that maybe, just maybe she had made a difference. Then complete and utter Hell broke loose. Flashes of screams, blood spraying, and body parts still haunted her. She knew she had made the right choice in lying, but nearly a month later she still couldn't come to terms with that had actually happened. Her will to survive had helped her, but thinking back on the others she felt guilty that she had lived and they had all died filthy deaths in the jungle. Thinking of herself strapped down, legs spread wide as that awful woman looked down disgusted. Knowing that she had gotten this close to getting cut had it not been for Lars. They knew she wasn't a virgin somehow, they knew she wasn't pure. If it hadn't been for him, she very well could have bled to death. Instead she had escaped. She owed her life to Lars, Daniel, and that little boy. If it hadn't been for any of them, she would have been dead. Now here she was, alive, sitting in her huge house with her best friend, with this secret. Could she honestly live the rest of her life living with the fact that she had escaped that hellish nightmare and left that bastard Alejandro behind?
Thinking of him ramming that dart into Lars' side her blood boiled. It wasn't right. It was all his fault, all his fucking fault. Looking around the room, Justine sighed remembering all of the past holidays, the happier ones back when her mother was still alive. Memories of her teaching her how to play the flute, her dazzling green eyes looking down at her and smiling, reminding her that she was special. That night Justine and Kaycee fell asleep watching movies. Snuggled up in bed with her, Justine fell into a light slumber hoping her father would actually be around tomorrow. Kaycee had fallen asleep first after going out to the back deck and lighting up her bowl. After falling asleep, Justine listened to her berthing before sneaking off to her gym bag and taking out one of Lars' shirts. She knew even if Kaycee woke up and saw her holding it she wouldn't know where it came from. Taking it out and snuggling under the blankets she brought it up to her face and deeply inhaled. Instantly she was able to summon his face. How he had sat next to her not he van ride to the plane from the first flight. How he had smirked and offered his hand.
"Guess we haven't officially met yet. I'm Lars."
Justine who had been both nervous and excited smiled and gave him his hand, feeling his strong grip as he shook it quickly.
"Justine. What year are you?"
"Freshmen, you?"
"Same."
"No shit. So, what brings you here half way across the world?"
Justine smiled.
"I guess…trying to find my calling. You?"
Lars raised his eyebrows fixing his baseball cap turned backwards on his head.
"Making history…you never hear of a ginger flying down this far South."
Laughing Justine met eyes with him before Jonah began talking to her for the rest of the ride. Now back in her bed, Justine laid there when suddenly a thought raced straight into her mind.
When was her last period?
She hadn't honestly thought of that. In fact with everything that had been going on, she figured it was just the stress that was making her late. Instantly panic leapt into her throat.
Laying there in bed, right beside her best friend her heart began to hammer. Snapping her wide eyes open, she scrambled for her nightstand and picked up her iPad. Swiping it open, she brought up her calendar. Looking back, suddenly the last several weeks came crashing down on her. She was late. The glow of the screen lit up her frightened face as she remembered the feeling of Lars moving inside of her, pressing his forehead against hers and reminding her that it was just the two of them.
"Shit…"
Sitting there, she knew she needed to be sure. Slowly wrapping her arms around herself as she laid her iPad back down, she slowly began rocking back and forth. There was no more sleep for her the rest of the night. The following morning Justine awoke a very sleepy Kaycee asking if she wanted to go into town, get some breakfast and make a run to the drug store and stock up on stuff they needed for the dorm. Kaycee, hungover, but willing to go bundled up as Justine borrowed one of her father's cars. Her dad was working today and had left another lovely note for them, urging them to go into town and enjoy themselves.
The drive down Justine kept fighting not to blurt out what she was scared of. Deciding she couldn't wait, she parked at the drug store first. Separating from Kaycee, she grabbed a basket, tossing razors, shaving cream, shampoo, and finally she found herself in the back of the store. Shaking, she blindly grabbed two different pregnancy tests, ignoring the price and hurried to the checkout before Kaycee could see. The ringer looked less interested as she bagged Justine's things. Paying quickly, she stood back before Kaycee came with her items and laughed at how quick she had been. Knowing she couldn't wait another second, she tossed down her own debit card and told Kaycee it was her treat. Raising her eyebrows, Kaycee smiled and threw down a few candy bars from the counter to add for good measure.
Once they were out, she thanked her and asked why she bought all that stuff for her? Justine forced a smile shrugging saying it was the least she could do and pointed to a small little restaurant that served breakfast down the street of the small little town center. Kaycee asked if they should stop and drop their bags off first? Justine kept walking calling back that she didn't want to miss out on getting a booth. Kaycee hurried behind her, and both walked into a fairly empty restaurant. It was still too early before the big breakfast rush. Still holding her bag, Justine said she needed to go to the rest room and to just order her toast.
Before Kaycee could question her, Justine hurried to the ladies room and went into one of the stalls, nearly dropping the bag. Fumbling, she took the first box out, read the directions and ripped it open. Nervously she stuck it under herself as she went to the bathroom and then capped it, looking at the tiny screen feeling sick to her stomach. She knew it just had to be nerves, no way this could happen, most of all now. She sat there, never feeling two minutes drag on as long as they did before. Sitting there, she tapped her foot knowing it was only a matter of time before Kaycee came in asking if she was okay. That's when her eyes dropped and she saw it.
The blue strip said positive. Positive. Her entire body went numb. The pregnancy test was positive. She was pregnant. Pregnant with Lars' baby, pregnant with a baby that was conceived in Hell.