Things did not go to normal. For one, Reborn showed up every night to offer Kyouya the position of a Guardian, who refused every time. Naturally, this made Mukuro start annoying his brother even more than usual, sayinglook, you're a celebrity, Kyou-chan!
Gokudera Hayato also had taken to threatening Kyouya to "accept it so Ienari-san can be the Boss! God knows he needs the extra help and the money I'm making for being Ienari-san's Storm Guardian is pretty nice and I don't want that to stop anytime soon!" or something along those lines. Tsuna had always thought that Ienari's and Gokudera's relationship seemed slightly forced.
Speak of the devil. Ienari swaggered (Tsuna kid you not, he swaggered) down the street Tsuna is currently walking on. He is flanked by Gokudera and Mochida. Ienari is pretty tall for his age. He towers over Tsuna by more than a foot. He has blond hair that he presumably inherited from their good-for-nothing dad and dark brown eyes. He is better built than Tsuna, who looks like he could be a ballerina. (Nana tried to sign him up for ballet lessons once because of this, saying that he would get more graceful. The plan failed spectacularly.)
"Yo, Dame-Tsuna!" Ienari greets, loud and annoying. Tsuna picks up his speed, but Ienari keeps up easily, Gokudera and Mochida trailing behind him. "Still mooching off the Hibari?" Ignore him, ignore him, pretend he's a fly- maybe not, now I want to smack him. Not that I'll be able to work up the courage. "Don't ignore me!"
Tsuna breaks out running, throwing away his digni- well, he never really had any in the first place. So he just runs. He feels a hand wrapping around his stick arm and yank him back. Ienari leers at him unpleasantly. Gokudera looks like he desperately wants to jump in but settles for glaring impressively at Ienari. "Think you can run away?" Tsuna mumbles. "What was that?"
He lashes out with his foot, kicking Ienari where the sun doesn't shine. Ienari keels over, groaning in pain. Mochida rushes to his side while Gokudera winced in sympathy.
Chuck Norris had nothing on him.
XXXXXXXXXX
Being in the Disciplinary Committee gave him certain privileges. Such as skipping class. It isn't like attending classes would help him with his short attention span (it was so noisy in classrooms, he can't understand how others bear it), so Tsuna asks Miyu to tutor him at home. In that free time, Tsuna had plenty of time to fill out paperwork in the reception office, most of which are comprised of damage reports and repair bills. Privately, Tsuna thinks that Kyouya himself causes around forty-five percent of the damage, but he isn't suicidal enough to say that out loud.
Tsuna looks up when a knock resounds. "Come in!" he calls before instantly regretting it. Standing before him is the strangest group of people he had ever seen. One of them is a hooded baby; he(?) gave off a similar aura to Reborn. Another is a multi-colored-haired man with an orange boa. Tsuna gulps and sends a silent prayer to God before asking, "How m-may I help you?"
"...You aren't Hibari Kyouya," the scarred man says after an awkward silence.
"I'm Hibari Tsunayoshi, Kyouya's my brother," Tsuna says (and it still feels weird to call himself a Hibari even though it's been five years). This causes murmuring among the group.
"The trash at the office told me he would be here," Silver-hair barks irritably.
"The...trash? I'm sorry, but our garbage can't talk, they prefer to stay in the trash cans," Tsuna says carefully, wondering if they escaped from a mental institution. Silver-hair turns red, seemingly speechless.
"He means the teacher, dear," cooes Rainbow-hair. "Squ-chan can't really speak normally, you know?
"Sure…If you want to find Aniki, you might want to check the school roof. He's usually there around lunch time."
"Thanks, you're such a darling!" Rainbow-hair flounces out of the room. "Let's go~!" The rest file out the door quickly with minimal talking. Tsuna wonders what that was all about, but decides he really doesn't want to know.
XXXXXXXXXX
Tsuna frantically scrounges through his room for his lucky pencil. To be more specific, the one that Kyouya had given him for his first birthday at the Hibari household. He groans loudly when he realizes that he probably left it at school. He sneaks a peek at the clock. Eight o'clock. Well, I can still drop by, Tsuna reasons. I do have the key to the school, after all.
Twenty minutes later
Tsuna dazedly stares at flashing tonfas striking against a fly-headed machine...thing. It looks like something that came out of an American horror movies, to be honest. Tsuna starts to wail and bangs his head against the brick wall. "Why does these things always happen to me!" he sobs miserably. He swears that he can hear God laughing at him from up above. Tsuna ducks instinctively (how?) as a bullet almost nicks his ear. Wide-eyed, he sinks down with his back to the wall.
You know what, he decides. I'll just wait until this is over to get my pencil. Better yet, why don't I just go back home. Of course, his legs rebel against him and stay paralyzed. Of course. Just when he had thought it couldn't get worse. As if the universe was actively trying to prove him wrong, the machine suddenly turns around and fixes its eyes(?) on his quivering body. Tsuna groans and isn't even surprised when a wave of bullets comes his way.
That doesn't mean he isn't scared out of his wits, though.
Kyouya darts to his side and hauls him out of harm's way. It's time like this that Tsuna can't decide whether to view him as an angel sent from heaven or Satan's grandchild. Probably a combination of both.
"You," Kyouya says ominously. Tsuna can almost see the waves of doom radiating off him. Farther away, Gokudera yells, "Tsuna-sama!" while Yamamoto asks confusedly, "Isn't he in my class?" Yes, Yamamoto-san, Tsuna thinks somewhat sardonically. And I've been in your class for the past six years.
"A-Aniki," Tsuna responds with a hint of despair. "I...forgot my pencil and I really need it because it's lucky and all and you know, it's the one you got me for my birthday! I really like it and I thought I wouldn't be able to get anything done without it and-and so I thought that I should just go over and get it really quick but then I saw this happening and-"
"Rambling is for herbivores," Kyouya intones.
"I'm a bunny," he says grimly. "You can't get more herbivorous than that."
"Uh, hello?" shouts Ienari the butthead. "You're supposed to be fighting!"
Kyouya glares icily at the blond. "Make no mistake, I am not fighting for you. I am fighting to protect Namimori." Ienari looks a little cowed and draws back. As if to spite him, Kyouya tucks his tonfas back into his...where does he put them? Hammerspace? Tsuna mentally puts that on the growing list titled, "Things that I Don't Understand."
"We have an agreement." Reborn pirouettes (what the hell?) onto Tsuna's hair and daintily pats down his pink tutu. "Do this and your family will be safe."
Wait a minute. Someone is actually threatening Hibari Kyouya and isn't getting maimed for it? And...oh dear God, why am I always caught up in these things. "No," Tsuna says out loud. "That is not okay. You don't just say that, that's called being a giant douchebag. Like, Ienari level." He ignores Ienari's squawk of anger. "Ow! Did you just hit my head with a hammer?!"
"Of course not, what are you talking about?" Reborn replies mildly. Tsuna mentally dubs him as the Douchebag, complete with a capital D. It's kind of amazing. Even Ienari only gets a douche in parentheses whenever he refers to him in his mind.
Two ladies with pink hair materialize in front of them. "You are interfering with the battle. You will only get one warning. Leave."
Tsuna swivels his head at the fly-headed machine. "Holy shit. There's a person in there." Kyouya whacks him on the head for language. "Ow!"
The sisters(?) look startled. "Excuse me?"
"Ah, well, um-" He flails his hands wildly, before saying meekly, "...intuition?" Heads swivel to look at him disbelievingly. Ienari snorts while Reborn looks suspiciously at the machine. Kyouya just...stares. Tsuna kind of fidgets awkwardly before rushing out an apology and fleeing from the scene.
He never did get his pencil back.
(The next morning, Tsuna laughs hysterically after Gokudera informs him over the phone that the Vongola Ninth had been found buried in the machine's chest.)
A/N: So, um...this is basically it. I never actually properly read the entire series of KHR although I love it to bits. I'm marking this story as complete for now, but I'll probably dabble in writing a few drabbles for "In Which Tsuna Wonders Why This is His Life." Ha. Dabble. Drabble.
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Anyways, thanks for reading and keep an eye out for random plot bunnies!