AN: Well the last chapter didn't get as many reviews as I had hopped but at least new readers started to read! So welcome new peoples! *waves* I'm glad everyone is enjoying the story so far, this chapter is where the accidental touches, longing glances, and Kevin's denial comes to fruition. Sooooo I do hope everyone has fun with it! This chapter I listened to Clarity by Zedd ft. Foxes! Give it a listen! It's very KevEdd :)
Also Special thanks to Wolfisis who makes writing this story all the more fun and special with her hilariously adorable reactions.
Annnnd thank you to Beautifulyaoilover93 for an idea suggestion I hope this is up to par on what you had envisioned :)
Declaimer: I do not own Ed Edd N' Eddy in any shape or form, if I did Kevin and Edd would have been kissing canonly at twelve years old *snicker*
Warnings: Past and present self mutilation, severe bullying(violence) hate crimes, possessive behavior, mature content of the M/M variety, mentions of past suicide attempts, Bad grammar and cursing on Kevin's part, anymore warnings will be listed as they come along
****Attention! Also I seriously need a Beta because I keep finding mistakes in my chapters unfortunately AFTER I post them x.x I seem to over look them accidentally lol a Second pair of eyes would be very much appreciated So if anyone is interested please pm me! Thanks~ *bows* ****
Troubled rasping gasps, followed by terribly frightened pained whimpers sharply cut through the night air of the otherwise very silent and extremely dark guest room like knives.
Icy pin pricking bouts of snow were batting nosily against the pane glass of the window as the wind outside howled in a most unpleasant sort of way.
The raven haired male was curled into a fetal position, smack dab in the middle of the large queen sized bed shivering badly.
Chest heaving rising uneven and fast he squirmed trapped in a tangle of thick blankets.
He curled inward on himself as if trying his hardest to unsuccessfully get away from something hostile yet unseen.
His black and red rocket ship patterned pajama pants bottoms had begun riding down his hips slightly with each movement his body made, revealing glimpses of pale alabaster skin.
He moaned fearfully as he jutted out his slender legs harshly to kick futilely at the invisible force trying to harm and hold him into place.
Tussled black strands of hair were fanned out around him like a dark halo as he continued to struggle helplessly against the malicious entity inside of his dreamscape.
"N-No…Mmm...pl-please…I..I…be-beg…..yo-you—Nnnn" Garbled incomplete sentences fell from his parted chapped lips in a jumble of desperate babble of pleading.
A light sheen of cold sweat began breaking out all over him, shimmering and gleaming clinging over his skin tightly.
Whimpering loudly he cried out loudly again this time completely lost to the fear swelling inside of his unconscious sleeping form.
Yawning sleepily Kevin scratched his side and exited from his room.
Frowning he squinted blearily into the darkness of the empty hallway as his eyes tried to in vain to adjust to the lack of light.
They really needed to get some sort of night light for the damn hall so he didn't end up tripping and breaking his face one of these days.
Why was he even awake? It was like three am in the fucking morning according to his stupid digital alarm clock.
The reason for his continued insomnia was then profoundly obvious through the fog inside of his tired brain.
Oh right…
He'd spent hours just tossing and turning in bed, trying to get comfortable.
But his thoughts had other plans apparently because they just kept circling around replaying, running over everything that had happened throughout the whole day.
Becoming lab partners with the twitchy nervous raven haired dweeb, finding him in that alleyway all bloodied and beaten, and seeing those fucking small but very deep looking cut scars on his pale thin wrists and equally deliciously pale flat chest and stomach.
It had sent a completely foreign feeling flooding through his chest.
One that he couldn't shake or identify, all he knew is that it just made him want to protect the stupid idiot all the more now.
Not to mention the semi hard on he had gotten while holding the distressed teen against his body during the small nerd's major freak out.
Now that had been embarrassing as fuck!
Thankfully Double D seemed to have been too out of it to take notice of his problem.
Otherwise he would have had had to explain a whole shit load of things he wasn't quite ready to or sure how to.
Christ and then there was that panic attack shit…
Geez…
Now there had been a new experience for him he hadn't been ready for.
He'd never seen a panic attack up close before, or had ever had one himself.
So he never really understood what people actually went through while during one of them before now.
But to see one that fucking bad first hand, to actually see one of the people…
One of the actual kids he had freakin' grown up with go through something that shocking and painful?
It had been really hard to watch, fucking scary even.
Especially because he had been totally powerless to stop any of it, he had felt totally helpless.
It pissed him off that he couldn't even help him in anyway other than trying his damndest to sooth the small shaking and gasping teen the best that he could by rubbing his back gently letting him know that he wasn't alone.
I mean he really couldn't imagine not being able to breathe like that, even the idea of not having any control over your own body just literally made it feel like a jagged block of ice had dropped into the pit of his stomach.
Though all of that aside…
He had much bigger problems to deal with at the moment.
For example, that for some odd fucking reason it felt as if his world had been tilted, causing to completely slide off its damn axis.
His emotions were getting seriously hard to control anymore, and his body just kept betraying his mind.
Everything that he knew, literally EVERYTHING that made sense to him just yesterday was beginning to warp and change into something he wasn't quite sure he liked.
He was changing mentally, and it was affecting the way he did everything.
Like who he talked to, or how he worded things.
And he was pretty damn sure he knew the root of the problem.
It was all because of one adorably adorkably small and lonely raven haired stupid hat wearing dorky teenage genius.
Oh how the mighty have fallen…
He literally felt like some teenage girl obsessing over a crush on some crappy cheesy drama TV show.
This wasn't goddamn "Twilight", and dude it sure as hell wasn't gonna end up being like some fucked up corny romantic love story…
But if it was…
Who'd he be though? The vampire or the werewolf..?
Werewolves were seriously way cooler than bitchy emo vampires that sparkled in the sun instead of died…
He paled dramatically and smacked a hand over his face in pure unadulterated horror.
Goddamn it, he really must be seriously tired to be comparing himself to fucking Twilight characters of all things…
Running a hand through his auburn hair he shook his head tiredly in disgust.
It was way too early to think about this sorta crap.
Maybe getting some water would help.
Grumbling he squished down the temptation on sneaking a beer from the kitchen.
He sure as hell could use one or two after everything that had happened.
Rubbing the back of his bare neck he stifled another yawn.
Wearing just forest green silk boxer shorts he was anything but modest with his extremely tanned well toned abdominal muscles and six pack on show for the world to see.
Then again who was awake to even see?
He closed the door to his room softly and trudged past his mother's room as quietly as he possibly could.
That's the last thing he needed right now, to awaken the monster across the hall from her slumber.
He loved his mom to death, but she was a completely different person when she was tired.
She legit transformed into a horrifically loud banshee when she didn't get her "beauty sleep" hours she always raved about.
And yeah he might not be the sharpest tool in the shed mind you, but he sure as hell wasn't stupid enough to have a death wish thank you!
Moving forward completely on auto pilot mode he trudged along looking very zombie like until a soft pained muffled noise echoed down the hall jarring him from his thoughts just as he had reached the end of it.
Blinking his exhausted green eyes in confusion he stopped short in front of the guest room door, and leaned closer to the wooden door frame curiously.
What the fuck had that sound been?
Unmistakable heart wrenching whimpers were now clearly filtering out from underneath the door.
Frowning he turned the knob to the side slowly and opened the door a crack before peering inside.
His eyes quickly drew themselves toward the curled up hunched form of Edd; who was still very much fast asleep, but held in the grips of some sort of bad nightmare from the looks of it.
"Nnng…p-lease..s-stop…don't…" The raven's pleading gasps made Kevin's insides twist painfully.
Opening the door even wider he slipped inside the room soundlessly, before closing the door with a soft click behind him.
Eyeing the distressed shaking form of the other teen he hesitantly made his way toward the bed his bare feet dragging across the rug as he went.
Tears leaked out of closed corners of the raven's eyelids as his eyes moved rapid and alert underneath them.
Salty trails streamed down seemingly pale luminescent cheeks, falling into tussled locks as the smaller teen continued his restless slumber fitfully moving about.
Debating internally but only momentarily, Kevin crawled onto the bed next to the other.
Sitting next to him the ex-bully looked at a loss as what to do.
Should he wake him?
Would that make things better or worse?
Fuck…
He wasn't good at this sort of thing…
Comforting people usually wasn't his strongest suit.
That was what Nazz was always for, she handled the chick flick moments.
He was better at ignoring things until they got easier to handle or they just went away completely.
Then again Edd seemed to bring out the strangest sides of him, ones he wasn't aware had even existed in the first place.
A strangled whimper coming from the smaller of the two made up his mind in a heartbeat.
The jock carefully pulled Double D onto his lap resting him between his legs while propping him up against his chest, his arms then encircled around the raven haired teen's slender waist protectively.
"Shhh…it's gonna be okay…you're safe, I promise I won't let anyone hurt you like that ever again."
He carded his calloused fingers soothingly through the teen's black tresses marveling at how feathery soft the younger's hair really was.
Why the hell did he wear that stupid hat anyway? It's not like there was some huge ass secret under it or nothin'.
There was no horrific scarring, or a bald head to be embarrassed of.
All that was to be found underneath the usually hat covered head of his was was silky long midnight black hair.
Yeah it may be a bit girly for a seventeen year old boy, but it kinda suited the dork in an odd endearing sort of way.
And now that Kevin had seen Double D's supposed "secret" it just had him itching to run his fingers through it all the time.
Huh…
Maybe that's why he hid his hair.
The very thought of other people beside himself wanting to touch the pint sized teen's hair made him growl low in the very back of his throat.
Tightening his grip unconsciously around him he leaned back against the headboard and rested his chin on Edd's shoulder marveling at how oddly perfect the dweeb felt in his arms.
The smaller of the two seemed to fit like a lost puzzle piece against him.
He then quickly made a face at his own lame and corny thoughts and hastily batted them away mentally.
"Mmmm…" Still a shivering mess the raven whined softly in his sleep and squirmed in the red head's arms while unconsciously rubbing his pert behind against Kevin's boxer clad crotch.
Stiffening shuddering some at the sudden contact, emerald eyes were no longer clouded over with sleep and were very much now awake as they darted down to see if Edd had awoken.
Mumbling sleepily he smacked pink lips cutely and snuffled his nose against Kevin's collar bone; cuddling up closely to the calming warm and protective presence that was now surrounding him like a cocoon.
After making sure the dork was clearly still asleep Kevin let out a strained hissing moan.
Sighing shakily he tried to shift in a way that didn't cause the raven to be pressed up against him so intimately.
Which only seemed to unfortunately make things much, much worse.
Instead of helping their situation Edd seemed to be unconsciously hell bent on making the poor tall red head harder.
What with the raven accidental rubbing and grinding down on him still blissfully unaware in a deep slumber.
He bit his lip and gritted his teeth hard letting out a hitched breath.
Yeah there was no denying it anymore; he was getting undoubtedly, seriously, fucking hard.
Over a fucking dude…
Okay an effeminate raven haired, cute, and short dude…
But still a dude all the same!
"Fuck…this isn't good."
"Mmmm…?" Double D murmured again before opening sleepy cyan eyes looking confusedly up into Kevin's now very much panicking emerald ones.
Blinking sleepily Edd mumbles softly aloud, "Well…at least a most unpleasant nightmare decided to turn into a exceptionally good dream…"
Smiling happily he replaced his head back against Kevin's chest closing his eyes.
But upon doing so he heard the red head's heart spike, beating a mile a minute beneath him.
Which clued him in on several things at once; one being he wasn't quite sure he was dreaming as he'd previously believed himself to be.
And two he was now very aware that he felt something decidedly hard and warm pressing against him from behind.
Which cleared most if not all of the fog of exhaustion out of Edd's mind.
His blue eyes snapped open startled looking as he jumped backward away from Kevin wide eyed his mouth agape in terror, "K-Kevin…what are you…how did…what is..?"
Before the jock could respond Edd's eyes lowered to the large tent in Kevin's boxer shorts.
The small raven rubbed at his eyes frantically.
"…Am I dreaming again…? Yes I must still be asleep…this cannot be real— " He shook his head back and forth in denial.
"Y-You, would never be…here with me. O-Of all people to choose from, I must be hallucinating…yes…that's it…hallucinations, snap out of it Eddward this is clearly all a mental delusion of some sort brought on by severe stress and..." He then pinched his arm hard and yelped in surprise at the pain.
His eyes watered at the edges before they snapped back up to the red head's emerald ones.
Swallowing hard he sputtered, "….P-perhaps then…you can…explain to me as to why you are in my room holding m-me affectionately in bed…while being so um…" He turned a deep crimson before continuing, "…substantially a-aroused?"
For once Kevin's usual cool stoic mask was cracking apart at the edges like faulty china, a strong tension weighed heavily upon his broad shoulders like heavily rusted armor.
A myriad of emotions were displayed on his face, deeply etching themselves into his eyes.
Fear, shock, denial, as well as something gleaming deep inside; something almost hungry and primal in which made Edd's lower stomach tighten in anticipation and excitement as to what it all could mean.
The ex-bully rubbed a hand over his face obviously very embarrassed, then clumsily combed it through his messy auburn hair before looking back at the smaller teen.
Taking a shuddering shaky breath he spoke in a rather deep husky tone that made Edd shiver upon hearing it, "I've been up for hours, I couldn't sleep. I kept thinking about all the crap that happened today and just couldn't seem to make it stop…so I thought I'd get some water to calm down, but before I could get downstairs I heard a weird noise."
Edd tilted his head to the side and crawled a bit closer to the taller male while listening intently.
Licking his lips some in a very out of character display of nervousness he continued, "Turns out you were having some kinda really shitty bad dream…and I couldn't just leave you there alone. You sounded so fucking scared, and…you were crying and stuff. I hate when people cry. So I tried to wait and see if you'd snap out of it on your own but you kept getting worse." He shifted back some in extreme discomfort, suddenly feeling very self conscious and aware of his still very apparent hard on.
"I didn't really know what the hell to do…I'm not exactly good at comforting people. But I thought maybe if I did what I did earlier during your panic attack you'd calm down enough or somethin'."
Double D could only guess where this had all lead to; he knew for a fact that he was an avid cuddler in his sleep, and moved around a good deal when he dreamed.
Years ago according to Eddy at past sleepovers in their childhood during those disgustingly mind numbing monster movie marathons at Ed's he would somehow end up from his sleeping bag and into poor Eddy's during the night.
Which would more often than not result in personal space breachings, and extremely awkward awakenings/conversations in the mornings after.
Looking back on it now he blamed it all on his neglected lack of human contact throughout his crucial younger years of development.
But that was another can of worms entirely, one he wasn't ready to open quite yet.
Squirming some he looked back to Kevin and quickly tried to somehow think of a way to salvage the situation and perhaps a bit of Kevin's pride in the process, "…Thank you very much Kevin…for, um…helping me out with my n-nightmare. I most certainly did not mean to warrant such a strong reaction from you in such an intimate fashion…"
His cheeks burned heating up to a dark crimson as he motioned at the red head's shorts feebly, "B-but as we b-both know…you are a healthy teenage boy a-and these sorts of things are extremely normal! Clearly a-any sort of the right stimulation w-would have caused it I'm sure. So there is nothing for you to be really be upset over or embarrassed abo—"
Rough harsh lips crashing against his own soft but chapped ones effectively shut him up, as the muscled tan biceps of the jock before him pressed up deliciously against his much smaller slender heavily bandaged frame.
Which immediately sent pleasurable shocks of electricity shooting up his spine, "Nnnnggg…K-Kev'in…w-hat a-are you do…Mmm!" Edd moaned unintelligibly into the red head's mouth.
Saliva was exchanged in a hot connection of clumsy rash pressing of lips.
Growling loudly Kevin greedily took in the lovely opportunity of Edd's open moist and parted mouth.
Before diving his tongue deep inside of the raven's mouth plundering it hungrily; making sure to savor the uniquely sweet taste that could only ever belong to the dweeb.
Moaning softly Edd in turn pressed closer wrapping his arms around the athlete's neck, his senses quickly setting on overload.
He panted hotly in soft huffs as their tongues battled against one another in a dance of dominance.
After winning, the red head swirled his tongue exploring over the raven's gums as he deepened the kiss further only pulling back every now and again ever so slightly for much needed air to pass between the two of them.
Kevin's body felt as if it were on fire as he literally dwarfed Double D's body with his own.
He pressed the smaller male roughly into the mattress making it creek as he provocatively held one of Edd's wrists pinned above his head against it.
Moving away from the raven's lips, the jock's teeth found their way to his neck as he bit hard against the genius's pulse leaving a sizable love bite behind.
Everything seemed to wind down around them in slow motion, as suddenly something clicked at the back of his mind; and as quickly as things had all began Kevin was scrambling backward off and away from Double D as if he had been struck by lightning.
Blinking in a dazed confusion Edd was still very much sprawled out on his back like a delicious offering, decidedly flustered and panting heavily in soft pained gasps.
Green eyes stared down at him alit with lust and something that made the raven's insides churn in fear, because it looked an awful lot like regret.
Wincing he pushed himself up with his elbows and sat up carefully as to not to cause anymore jostling to his already badly bruised ribs.
His chest burned a bit every time he breathed and his lips felt slightly swollen and moist.
A feeling of frigid deep dread was slowly overtaking his stomach; one he was all too familiar with, because it was usually followed by an inevitable biting rejection of some kind.
"Kevin…?" His eyebrows furred in concern as he inched toward the equally flushed and panting older teen before him, "A-are you alright?" He reached out a shaking hand to touch the red head's, but Kevin quickly pulled his hand out of reach.
"Look…um…Double D…this was a huge mistake…I..I'm not like you…I'm not a…fucking fa—" He stopped instantly regretting what he almost had said at the sudden stricken heartbroken look that was now taking over Edd's face.
He lowered his green eyes guiltily looking anywhere but Edd's sorrowful cyan orbs "I-I'm not gay dude…I like girls…hell I liked Nazz for like forever you know? I dunno what the hell that was, or what happened just now. But you just make me so goddamn crazy an confused…but this can't happen…better yet it didn't happen at all okay? Just do us both a favor and pretend it never did." He quickly scrambled away climbing off the bed on shakily limbs.
Silently blinking back rapidly oncoming tears Edd just sat there on the bed staring off at the wall and nodded not even bothering to look at Kevin.
Each word had been hammered into his heart painfully like a nail into slowly rotting wood, drilling holes into it harshly.
He didn't trust his voice at all, so he just opted to stay quiet, only soft chocked hiccuping noises managing to break the surface of his lips.
Kevin looked at the floor trying in vain to ignore the pained noises Edd was now making.
It felt like barbed wire was encircling and clenching over his heart as he did so.
Clenching his jaw shut in a sudden resolve Kevin left without another word silently closing the door, not even bothering to glance back behind him.
The moment the door had clicked shut Edd closed his eyes tightly, before letting out a mournful strangled cry as he hugged his knees to his chest.
His finger nails found the flesh of his thighs and dug deeply into the skin leaving pink half crescent moon shaped markings behind in their wake.
Hiccuping shudders wracked his body as salty tear tracks flooded down his pale flushed cheeks.
Yes a mistake…
That's all he'd ever manage to be.
He should have known better then to believe even for a second that Kevin would be different, that he could ever truly want him…
No one ever did.
Everyone left eventually, so why was he so surprised?
Why had he let these feelings of infatuation and admiration fester so deeply inside of his already bruised and battered heart?
He clenched a hand over his chest digging his fingers harshly into the bandages ignoring the spikes of pain it caused the bruises beneath.
Perhaps he was a masochist.
Rubbing the backs of his hands over his still leaking cyan eyes he crawled underneath the covers touching the still warm spot in which Kevin had previously been seated in.
Sobbing softly he forcefully willed himself to be silent.
This was the last time he'd hope.
The last time he'd believe in something good happening.
He would not be weak.
Not now, and not ever again.
Soon only the quivering shake of his slender shoulders betrayed that he was still indeed crying.
The morning sun streamed in lazily through the open curtains most annoyingly as it was coincidentally if not ironically angled specifically over his closed eyes.
Grumbling weakly Eddward sat up and rubbed the eyelids of his now sore itchy reddened blood shot eyes.
Looking outside briefly before pulling back the warm comforter away from his body he sighed.
Swinging his legs over the side of the bed he stood wobbling and made his way over to the drawers he had packed full of his clothes the previous night.
Sticking his tongue in-between the gap of his teeth in concentration, he searched around trying to decide on what to wear for the day.
Finally after a few minutes of deliberation he pulled out a plain long sleeved black fishnet undershirt, a dark purple Invader Zim tee with GIR on the front ranting about something nonsensical involving tacos, and a nice pair of matching form fitting dark purple skinny jeans.
Quickly dressing he walked over to his satchel bag and opened one of the side pouches.
Digging around he finally found what he was looking for, a smooth easy roll on black eyeliner pencil, liquid cover up, and a concealing powder compact.
He knew for a fact if he didn't put any on himself he would never hear the end of it from Marie.
For he was pretty sure he had a darkening bruise on his neck where the blood vessels had been broken by Kevin's sharp persistently tugging teeth.
Bringing his fingers to his neck he skimmed his fingers over the now blemished pale flesh hesitantly.
His very first and last hickey, it was all pretty depressing if he dwelled upon on it long enough.
It was like a final branding of the painful yet lovely connection in which they had so briefly shared.
This too would vanish soon enough.
Fumbling slightly he stared down at the items in his hands.
Hopefully with the help of the makeup no one would notice how red his eyes truly were or the bruising evidence of his late night encounter.
Flicking open a small red compact mirror Marie had also gifted upon him, he surprisingly and quite skillfully much to his surprise applied two layering's of black eyeliner to the water line of his eye, and then all the way around it.
Then he unscrewed the cap to the liquid cover up and smeared a generous amount of it across his fingers slightly and carefully covered the spot on his throat before taking the powdered concealer and patted it down gently over it.
Putting everything away and wiping off his hands with a wash cloth he studied his work as he stared into the tiny mirror.
Blood shot blue eyes glared back at him harshly in response; both orbs filled with a tired defeated sort of look to them.
Sighing softly he supposed make up could only do so much.
At least now no one would ask questions about the reddened puffiness of the skin around his eyes or the love bite on his throat which was pretty much hidden by his shirt anyway.
Looking over to the desk table at Jim he automatically painted on a smile out of pure habit.
Turning his eyes downward he picked up his treasured black and white beanie.
Clenching it in his small hands he ran his slender fingers over it, basking in the security that it gave to him before placing it on his head, this time not bothering to tuck away his shoulder length black hair inside of it.
Leaning down he picked up his grey messenger bag filled with his for once very much unfinished homework and un opened books.
Oddly enough though for the very first time in his entire life that he could properly recall he could not bring himself to truly care about whether or not he had done his schoolwork or not.
Which was probably, a metaphorical yet blaringly obvious glowing red stop sign hung up just before the inevitably huge plummet off of a cliff's edge.
But it was more than clear to him that he wasn't quite feeling himself today.
In fact come to think of it he wasn't sure when the last time he'd really felt like his old self at all.
Had it been months?
Years perhaps?
He couldn't recall when this numbing feeling had really all begun to set in taking hold over him.
All that he did know presently was that he could barely piece together a time in which he had felt truly "happy" and or "content" with everything in his life.
Of course there were those snippets of past laughter and joyous unforgettable adventures he'd always hold dear to his heart, but they too had faded over time.
Like black and white film grain memories, each flickering into the darkness of the back corridors of his mind like helpless silently dying stars, all in which over the years had begun to erode crumbling away leaving long lost bitter phantoms of what once was in their place.
He couldn't tell you what it felt like before the sharp cold claws of depression had ensnared his senses and shattered his once infuriatingly cheery optimism.
Loneliness had always gone hand in hand with being who he was.
It was so ingrained into his life, that he had learned to ignore it the best of his abilities.
He had become undeniably used to it.
Though as a child he had tried to combat it with falsified cheerfulness, blinding smiles, scientific endeavors, and childish unrealistic hope.
He grimaced pursing his lips distastefully.
Now look where that had all brought him, be barely had one friend currently.
If he could label Marie even that.
Their relationship was shaky at best of times and he wasn't quite sure he could bring himself to dub her "friend" for he was fearful of what that might mean.
He learned at a very tender age of the realistic cutting biting taste of disappointment, and what it does to your trust when it repeatedly occurs.
For the moment you establish and acknowledge the reality of a bond, the ever more closely you are to breaking it all apart at the seams.
Swatting his thoughts away with a swift shake of his head he leaned down to put on long black socks.
After mechanically pulling on his lace up black high heeled boots he brushed down his pants free of invisible lint or dust and made his way out of the guest room.
Sparing a quick glance around the room to be sure he had not left anything behind he swung his grey messenger bag over his shoulder securely and continued on his way.
The first thing that assaulted his fogged senses was the distinct crackle of bacon being cooked.
Sniffing absently he made his way down the carpeted stairwell slowly forcing his feet onward.
He passed by a hanging clock on the wall and took note that it was only six am, he could only assume it was Rosemary making breakfast and not her son.
Or perhaps that was just large pitiful hoping on his part and not astute reasoning.
Though thankfully upon reaching the kitchen his assumptions were proved to be correct.
A soft smile tugged at his lips as he took in the scene before him.
Humming cheerily Rosemary Barr wiggled her hips to the music that was spouting blaringly loud from her bejeweled emerald encased Iphone on the table.
She was still in her pajamas from the night before and her hair was a disarray of copper ringlet curls bobbing here and there out of place as she danced.
Turning the bacon over in the pan she grinned happily as she plated a bunch of the meaty strips onto a blue and white serving platter; before moving back to the stove and cracking open several eggs into the skillet.
Suddenly having somehow sensed the raven's presence the copper haired woman turned to the side and smiled brightly winking in greeting, "Good Morning Eddward, early riser I take it?"
Smiling politely Edd took a seat at the table, "I've never been one to sleep in, especially on school days."
"If only Kevin could take on some of that good morning routine of yours! I swear it's like waking a coma patient with him, I sometimes have to pour a jug of water on him to even get a reaction." She snorted and blew some curls out of her face as she turned the eggs and then plated them alongside the bacon.
His lips twitched downward against his will to keep his faux smile going so he simply chose to stare at the floor instead of responding.
Frowning slightly Rosemary wiped off her hands and put the food on the table, "Something you want to talk about Eddward? You seem a bit more quiet than usual."
Cyan eyes darted upward quickly looking into soft concerned emerald eyes, near identical eyes to the ones that still haunted him.
Swallowing a lump in his throat he pasted on another smile and shook his head warily, "Nothing more than the day before…I'm very sorry to be such a bother..I can only wonder what it's like to suddenly have a stranger thrust upon you and living in your home. Let alone a strange teenage boy with…special needs."
He gripped his pants tightly with white knuckled hands.
Elegantly gentle slightly larger hands covered his own making him look back up confusedly at the sudden act of affection.
Rosemary was now sitting across from him her hands blanketing his smaller set, "I may not know what it's like to be inside of your head Eddward, but I do know from my own experiences what it's like to be alone. What it's like to feel like you will always be alone, and that no one will ever reach out to bother or notice your pain."
She smiled sadly to him her eyes clear and shining with such genuine sincerity that it made his chest feel tight, "I don't know what you've gone through before now, and I can only imagine it's been one hell of a painful experience to get to where you are now. But I'm not going anywhere, I promise you that. We may not know much about one another but I know enough to see you're a good boy. You have a good heart, and are very kind despite what people have done or said to you. That takes courage, and strength not many people have."
Giving his hand another soothing gentle squeeze she pulled them away and giggled some, "You're not a bother either, no one and I mean absolutely no one who can make my tough guy attitude driven son blush brighter than a ripe tomato could ever be a bother to me!"
"Now then let's eat some of this before Kevin comes lumbering down growling like a bear and eats all of it before us."
Still absorbing all of the kind words, compliments, and warmth of their conversation the raven merely nodded with a soft noise of agreement.
Kevin's mother was such a jarring spontaneous reinterpretation of everything he had once thought he had known a parental figure to be.
Nothing she did made sense.
She always put him off guard, making him feel surprisingly warm on the inside.
He wasn't used to affectionate gestures, or soothing touches.
It was all so very new and foreign to him.
Between the day's previous happenings, last night, and now this morning; his brain was nearing a system overload and imminent internal shut down.
He soon busied himself with nibbling on some bacon as he let his thoughts sweep him away.
Yawning dramatically the red haired jock scratched the back of his neck as he walked into the kitchen fully clothed for school.
Looking around he spotted his mother sipping coffee while she aimlessly stared out the window in thought by the back door.
Frowning he took in the absence of Edd right away a sinking feeling overtaking his gut, "Where's the dork?"
Frowning chastisingly at her son she walked over and leaned up on her tippy toes to smack the back of his head, "Be nice, he had a rough day yesterday, and it looks like he got little to no sleep last night the poor dear.." She sighed, "Barely ate any breakfast too…"
"Where is he though?" Kevin questioned again rubbing his head gingerly as he tried to sound casual while he picked up a few pieces of bacon to snack on on his way to school.
"Oh he left already; I tried to get him to wait so you could both walk together but he got very jittery and rambled on about not wanting to impose his unwanted presence on you." She eyed Kevin her emerald eyes flashing dangerously, "I don't suppose you know what he meant by that do you Kev?"
Nearly choking on a piece of bacon he downed some orange juice quickly and coughed sputtering some, "W-What? Why the fuck would I know what the dweeb's going on about? He's always rambling and nervous, why's that gotta be suddenly my fault?"
Looking away from his mother's accusing glare he picked up his worn red back pack, "Look I'll try to find him later to walk home with him or somethin' I ain't got any practice after school so I'll make sure he gets here unharmed. Alright?"
Frowning deeper she nodded before blinking she then smiled some and pulled out two black and white checkered wrist bands holding them out, "Here, I forgot to give these back to him. I'm sure he'll feel more secure with them on. Make sure he gets them, and also fix whatever you did."
Snatching the bands from her he groaned loudly, "I didn't do anything!"
She glares at him an eyebrow raised, "Maybe that's the problem."
"Eh?" He blinked in return.
"School now Kev, try not to make a mess of the rest of the day hmm?"
Grumbling the jock quickly stuffed the wrist bands into his orange jacket pocket and hurried outside into the biting cold.
This was gonna be a long ass day and he was already dreading it.
Fuck why did he have a really bad feeling?
Shrugging he ran down the side walk and toward Peach Creek High trying to push down the barrage of emotions spiraling in his chest.
If he had really made the right decision.
Why did it have to feel so wrong?