Memories
Taking on Pain
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If you want to use Tora, or any of my other characters, PM me.
"Where were you?"
"Meeting Cap. We were talking about Etana. I gave him a chance to say goodbye."
Logan put his hand on her shoulder.
"They were good friends weren't they?"
She smiled wryly.
"Yes. Very good friends. The best."
Hank frowned.
"He mentioned a Shadow once when I was with the Avengers. We were in a fight and he cursed and said that if Shadow were still alive, we'd have no bother. I never guessed Etana was Shadow."
"Do you know that was her first title? Darkwing, The Black Angel, they all came later. First she was Justice's Shadow. And that's who she was for years. The one in the dark who pointed out the guilty ones to blind Justice."
"You've been talking to her again."
"Yes. It helps me. I know she's still dead but I can still get advice."
"Does she still talk in riddles?"
"All the time."
And Tora turned away.
"I've got papers to mark. I should get them done tonight."
"You're a good teacher."
"I hope I'm better than my old teachers."
"That's not funny."
"Oh but it is."
And she moved quickly, hurrying up the stairs before either Logan or Hank could stop her.
"By the way Hank, the lab's on fire."
Hank froze, sniffed then went charging off, a name coming out in a roar.
"XIIIXXXXYYYYY!"
The three women laughed.
"Did he ever succeed in setting fire to the whole mansion?"
"He blew up the brig on Utopia once."
"He…blew it up?"
"No one knew exactly how he did it."
"He blew up the brig?"
"Yes. That's what I said."
"As in the brig designed to survive in outer space.
"Yes, that brig."
"How?"
"I just said I didn't know."
"That's the old you. Finally."
She moved carefully, going through the motions slowly and precisely. If required, she could do it with the same precision at three times the speed and with fatal results. But at the moment, she was relaxing. So she moved slowly, concentrating on her breathing and the exact position of her limbs. She held each move for three seconds before going smoothly into the next. Back at the facility, this had always been done fast, with her teachers expecting her to get it perfect at full-speed. It was only later that she'd learned how to relax, how to do Tai Chi and so on. As once the moves had made her afraid, upped her heart rate and adrenalin, now they helped her breathe and let the stress out. And she needed to get the stress out.
She was on mission control again and in the last week over eight alternate reality versions of herself had died. One had been unable to take the strain of heroing, teaching and every other little job and slit her wrists in the bath (always trying to be tidy). Another had got on the wrong side of Magneto one time too many and found her body ripped to shreds by the very metal that held her skeleton together. One had been executed for the murder of over eight thousand baseline humans. Yet another had failed to catch Storm's hand as she had fallen down into the sea after blowing up the Sentinel. It turned out drowning kept her dead. Note to self, stay away from deep water. Molecular disarrangement also was a nasty way to go. Another note to self. Next time you go up against a powerful telekinetic, don't tell them to 'do your worst'. Actually, most her deaths had been as a result of her own stubbornness, although she didn't count the accident with the vaporiser. That was Reed's fault. What idiot puts a robot with a vaporiser on guard outside his lab when he knows he has visitors? Idly wondering what Scott had done to Reed, Tora finished the kata. It was quite odd feeling your life slip away and yet knowing you were still alive. The first time it had happened, she'd panicked. But Logan had held her tight as Professor Robson had slowly dissected her for failing on a mission. And out of compassion, Tora had remained, calming X-ii and taking the pain from her. It was difficult, tiring, but she'd managed it. And the relief from her counterpart had been so strong she'd taken to doing this often. Stealing pain and giving the better emotions. It was weighing down on her. The others were helping but there were so few with enough good memories to take the pain on. And then there were realities where mutants didn't exist. In those ones, she could read her own thoughts but they couldn't read hers. Although she could influence them. Not that she would of course. But if she wanted too, she could. She changed quickly, getting ready for lessons. Last day before the Christmas holidays. She was looking forward to some time alone. Peace and quiet. And more time with Eloise. She'd always known the whole X-Men thing wasn't for her. And so she was now quite happy taking the telekinetic lessons. And worrying about her relationship with Luke and whether eighteen was too young to be properly 'involved'. That didn't bother Kitty and Piotr much.
She smiled at Xixy as he walked into the Danger Room after her, his thickened goo forming fearsome black armour. He'd 'come out' as an alien and was actually one of the more popular heroes. Possibly because he kept coming out with ridiculous remarks in front of reporters. Oh well. Win some, lose some. She threw her pen into the air and caught it absent-mindedly, her thoughts already going to May. And the babies.
No smiles. No laughs. Just sadness.
"To do that to a child…"
"To do it to a mother…"
"Jean, it was worse for the child."
"I lost both my children, even if they weren't my children."
"And I lost every single one. They all died while I remained young. I never got a chance… Never had a chance…"
A.N. I've got prelims (mock exams) and I need to revise. Expect updates sporadically. Sorry for any inconvenience caused.