Chapter 13

(Prepare for a super long chapter)

Eliza's Current Outfit

I woke up the next morning feeling better than I had since before this all started. I was warm, my stomach was full, and most of all, I was safe. For the time being, I was completely, uninterruptedly, 100% safe. I could now honestly say that I would make it through the winter.

Fast Forward Another Two Months

It must have been a late snow fall because, before I knew it, the snow was gone. I guessed that it must have been somewhere between February and April. It's still pretty cold out though so I've hung onto my warmer jacket. The boots are gone, though. The gift shop had a nice selection of shoes so now, I don't have holes in them! I've got a whole new set of knives as well! Words can't describe how beautiful they are. Just.. Clean. New. Sleek. Perfect. Also, as you may have noticed, by some miracle I haven't lost my glasses! The prescription hasn't changed either so that's good. I mean, I'm not blind without them but everything is a bit out of focus (A/N lol me in real life) so I just prefer to wear them all the time. I really hope they don't break. I was feeling really happy today. I felt on top of the world like nothing could bring my mood down.

And then I remembered. If it's around the time I think it is, my birthday is soon or has already passed. I am (or will be) twelve years old. Mum would have been so proud. Her little girl growing up. I'll be a teenager next year. These past few months have been so quick, unlike the first few after Clary died. Those ones seemed to drag on for forever. I feel better now. I've mourned. I've moved on. I'm still sad about it but you can't dwell on the past. It won't change anything. Twelve years old always seemed like such a big number before this started. Now, it means nothing. My age doesn't determine how well I survive. I determine how well I survive. Well, you haven't done very well. I found that gas station! I'm doing great. But you'll mess up again. Yeah, right! You will! Listen to me! You will mess up again! I'm done listening to you! Get out of my head! I've decided that instead of trying to block out that voice inside my head, I'll just deny it the satisfaction of making me sad or upset. It's not a real person, just my subconscious. That means I can do something about it. Anyways, back to my birthday. I guess I won't be getting a cake this year. No presents either. The clothes and safety that I have are presents enough. Sort of. I mean, I wish my parents were here. I wish Clary was here too. I think they would've gotten along well. Would I have even been very close to Clary if this didn't happen? I mean, we talked but we never really were all that close to each other. Ok, I admit it. I wish I wasn't alone on my birthday. It may not be my birthday exactly but I know it's around this time somewhere...

It wasn't long before the frost was gone. It was still cold so I kept my coat but, no matter how much I loved the little home I'd set up, it's not safe to stay in one place for so long. For the first time in a quite a bit, I started to pack up my things. I had actually collected a lot from the scavenging I've done in other buildings around. My backpack was filled to the brim with food and spare clothes. I hit the road. The walk wasn't too boring today. There were buildings and plants to look at and I was finally realising this affect the end of the world was having on the planet. Buildings were lined with vines and overgrown weeds. Yards that were painstakingly tended too were now overgrown. Animals were everywhere. If I didn't already have more than enough food, I'd be hunting. Deer were everywhere along with rabbits, racoon's, and skunks. There were other animals around that were best I avoid. These would include bears, wild dogs, and house-pets-turned-feral. I felt bad for them. Once upon a time, someone had taken care of these pets but now, they had to resort back to their basic animal instincts just to make sure they didn't starve to death. I had seen them in action. The poor things had turned vicious, tearing apart a rabbit in seconds. It was heartbreaking to watch and almost brought tears to my eyes. I kept going and made a mental note to never cross paths with them. I've been lucky so far so I'm hoping it stays that way until I make my way out of town. I've felt quite down lately. Just... sad. Maybe it's the loneliness finally setting in and taking over. I haven't seen any humans for months and good ones for even longer. I rarely talk. I've almost forgotten what my own voice sounds like. It's as if I've forgotten how. I felt like if I were to speak, I wouldn't be able too. It would come out dry and raspy. Maybe I should start talking outside of my head instead of inside.

Eventually, I made it out of town. There were three walkers following me but I wasn't in the mood to deal with them. I'll get tired of the growls eventually but for now, I'll just leave it. That's basically my life motto. Why do something when it can wait for later?
"Grrrrrr." You know what? Never mind, I'll get rid of them now. I turned around and started walking towards them. They sped up, coming towards me, and I shoved my knife through the first one's forehead, its brain and blood spilling all over my jacket. Damn it, now I need to use the one in my bag. The second one was much too close for comfort. It almost scratched me but I won't go down that easily. I may have taken out that one but I was too late to catch the third one. Before I knew it, I was on the ground, desperately trying to push the walker off of me. My knife had fallen just out of my reach. The walkers disgusting smell took over my senses, making me wretch. I was lucky for my jacket because, without it, the walkers' nails would have straight through my skin. I raised up my feet and pressed against the walkers' chest. This allowed me a free hand. I started wriggling, moving towards my knife. The teeth clicking above me, slowly getting closer, encouraged me to push onward, despite how tired I was. It was useless, I realised, when I had been on the ground for at least 3 minutes and I was nowhere closer to the knife than when I started. My next best chance was to push this giant walker off of me and get up. I pushed as hard as I could, my feet starting to crush the bones under its' rotting skin. When I slipped, I thought it was all over. The walker was less than an inch to my shoulder. I closed my eyes, still pushing, beginning to accept that this would be the end of me. Here I was, in the middle of the road, alone and cold, about to be eaten by a walker. I could almost feel the walkers' teeth in my skin when suddenly, it collapsed on top of me, lifeless. I quickly pushed it off of me and jumped to my feet. Standing in front of me was a boy. He couldn't've been more than 8 or 9 years old, even younger than me. He had a large kitchen knife in his hand and was wearing tattered clothes. On his back a small backpack but there was only one thing I really noticed about him. It was the sickly look he had, his skin pale and clammy. His eyes had dark circles underneath them and he looked weak and as if he were going to collapse at any second. If it wasn't for one thing, I would've thought he was on drugs or something. As he looked at me, he fell to the ground. That one thing was the three long scratches dragging across his chest.

I had quite the problem now.
1-There was a small child who had just saved me.
2-He was laying in the middle of the road.
3- He had been infected by the virus.
I mean, I couldn't just leave him there. I knew he was going to die soon but he had saved me! I decided that since it would be dark soon, I might as well find some shelter and take him with me. Just to be safe, I tied his hands and feet together with duct tape and put some over his mouth. I didn't know when he was going to turn! I couldn't try to help him, only to die myself! I recalled a small shack I had passed some ways back and decided it looked sturdy enough. Who knows, maybe that kid even lives there. When I picked him up, either I had gotten a lot stronger or this boy was weaker than I thought. He was almost as light as my backpack. I felt so sorry for the kid. It seemed like he was all alone. If he was, how long had it been? As I entered the shack, I was relieved to see it was empty. Not only that but the boy indeed lived there. There were candles all around and a sleeping bag on the floor. He also had a few cans of food but I assumed he wasn't eating because he was sick. I placed him down on top of the sleeping bag and sat down on the floor beside him. It wasn't long before he woke up, just before dark. His eyes fluttered open and I instantly saw the fear in them. In a flash, I had reached over and taken the duct tape off his mouth. He instantly attacked me with questions.
"Who are you!? How did you find my base? Why am I tied up!? What happened?" I could tell he was scared and instinct told me to gentle with him. The voice I put on surprisingly reminded me of the tone my mother used when I would fall off my bike or accidentally break something.
"Hey, hey! It's alright, ok? I'm not going to hurt you. How about we start with your name and then I'll answer your questions." The kid visibly calmed down so I guess it worked.
"M-my names Connor. Connor Montgomery. What's your name?"
"I'm Eliza. Eliza Connors actually." I said with a chuckle. " How old are you Connor?"
"Nine." He replied in a shaky voice. So I was right. He was younger than me.
"Ok. So you wanted to know why you're tied up. I hope you can understand but I noticed your scratches. I didn't want you to... turn..without me noticing. Do you get it?"
"Y-yeah. I understand. But how did you find my base?" I could tell he was upset at the mention of the scratches. I was determined to make sure I answered all these kids' questions. He was already doomed but maybe I could make his last day or two better.
"Well, it was sort of an accident. I didn't know it was your base, it was just the closest safe place I could find. You did a very good job finding it Connor."
"Ok then... Hey, I remember now! I saved you!" Though the boy was weak, his enthusiasm was not to be diminished. He was clearly proud of his accomplishment.
"Yes, you did! If it weren't for you Connor, I'd be done for! That was very brave." I could see the boy was getting tired now. "Maybe you should try to sleep now? I'm sure you're very tired."
"Yeah I really am. I still want to-" he was cut off by a yawn, "-talk to you." Before I could reply, he was already asleep. I pulled the sleeping bag over the top of him and nestled myself into a corner. I was so tired, I didn't even care that I was sitting on the hardwood floor. I was quickly pulled into unconsciousness.

I woke up rather abruptly to a loud yell. I sat up and look over at Connor. It was dark outside but the last candle still burned. I saw him, trembling with fear.
"Connor? Connor, look at me? Are you ok?" He was paler than before if that was even possible.
"I-I-I had an n-nightmare." The poor kid. If he's alone, I can't even imagine the kinds of things he's seen.
"It's ok Connor," I reassured. "It was only a dream ok? It wasn't real." He looked slightly more relaxed but I could tell he wouldn't sleep anytime soon if I didn't do anything. Suddenly, my very favourite Disney movie popped into my head. Peter Pan. I remember a song someone had made up based on the movie and I had known it by heart. I began singing as I held Connor in a hug.

(I suggest listening to Lost Boy by Ruth B here.)

There was a time when I was alone
Nowhere to go and no place to call home
My only friend was the man in the moon
And even sometimes he would go away, too.

Connors' eyes looked up at me in wonder. I guess I'm a good singer?

Then one night, as I closed my eyes,
I saw a shadow flying high
He came to me with the sweetest smile
Told me he wanted to talk for awhile
He said, "Peter Pan. That's what they call me.
I promise that you'll never be lonely."
And ever since that day...

As I sang, his eyes started to drift shut.

I am a lost boy from Neverland
Usually hanging out with Peter Pan
And when we're bored we play in the woods
Always on the run from Captain Hook
"Run, run, lost boy," they say to me,
"Away from all of reality."

Neverland is home to lost boys like me.
And lost boys like me are free.

As I sang the last few words of this part of the song, I felt my own eyes become heavy. Within minutes, I had managed to lull both me and Connor back into the world of dreams, where anything was possible and I really could go to Neverland. My night was filled with pictures of pixies and pirates as I flew through this gorgeous new world where I would never grow old...

When I woke up the next morning, I knew today would be Connors last day. His skin was soaked in sweat and he was trembling even more than yesterday. His fever was high and I could tell he was scared.
"Connor, do you know what's going to happen today?"
"I'm going to d-die, aren't I?"
"I'm afraid too but don't think of it as dying! Think of it as going off to a new world, Heaven, where you'll always be happy. You'll never get sick or hurt and you can have anything that you want.. It'll be better there than in this world."
"Will you be there Eliza?"
"I'm sorry but I won't Connor. You see, I made a promise with someone that I wouldn't go yet. I promised that I'd keep going as long as I could. Someday I'll be there but not yet.."
"O-" Connor went to reply but was cut off with a sudden fit of violent coughing. It seemed to go on for ages, making me want to yell at him to stop, and when it stopped, he was silent.
"Connor? Connor are you ok?" He wasn't moving. I went to reach for his wrist and when I couldn't feel a pulse, I couldn't help but cry. Tears ran down my cheeks and sobs escaped my mouth without my consent. I broke down completely, devastated by the death of this poor boy. He didn't deserve this! No one did! He was only nine! Nine years old and he had died, scared and sick, with no family! He was all alone just like me! The only human that was kind since Clary had died and now he was gone too! The same as her! Everyone left me! Everyone! Why does this always happen to me! The tears that raced down my cheeks began to make a small puddle on the floor, as well as dampening my shirt. What felt like hours was only about ten minutes but it felt like the end of the world to me.

(If you're still listening to the song, now would be the time to pause it for the rest of the chapter.)

I eventually had to pull myself together. I decided I need to put Connor down. I didn't want him to turn. It was difficult but necessary. I took what little food he had and, once again, began walking. The highway was long and boring. I passed the walkers that were killed yesterday and spat on them in disgust. It was one of them that did this to Connor. It was their fault he was dead now. I walked miles, my feet tired and aching and my heart heavy with grief. Nothing could make me feel better. I decided to turn and go into the woods for the night. I would set up in a tree again, considering I could not be reached up so high. I wasn't paying attention and before I could stop myself, I had tripped on a rock and began tumbling downhill. My arms and face were scratched and I hit my head more times than I can count. When I finally stopped, I looked up, still in a considerable amount of pain, and gasped in shock. Standing there before me, just at the bottom of another hill, was a prison. Better yet...

There were people there.