A/N: I'm baaaacccck. After almost a year of not updating. I am so sorry, so soo sorry. But I had just started my first year of uni, and I had a shit time with mental illness. BUT, I am getting help and whatnot.
Trying to write while I was constantly stressed was not fun and I always had writers bock, but, here is a new chapter for all you very patient lovelies 3

"Tattoos, after all, are a passionate, usually doomed assertion of mastery of your own destiny, or at least a defiant embrace of one that you cannot control."
― Mark Simpson, Saint Morrissey: A Portrait of This Charming Man by an Alarming Fan

Zoro groaned and rolled over, growling at the angry buzz of his phone. It had been a couple of days since he had met Sanji, and every morning he had woken up to at least one call or text about the guy. Most of them were from Luffy, urging him to go out and find Sanji so they could have their dinner. However, every morning there was at least one from someone who had just heard the news, either congratulating him or complaining about how he hadn't told them himself.

Honestly, he didn't give a shit. Yes, it was cool to meet his soul mate, kind of weird and surreal, but his life was no different. Zoro would still get up every morning and he would still work, still hang out with his crew. There might be an addition, but his life was not changing.

He sighed and reached across his bed, blindly searching for his phone. Whoever had the courage to call him before 7 am was either related to him or a friend of his. Zoro squinted at the caller ID and groaned. If he let it go to voicemail, she would just call again and she would be even more furious. Sighing, Zoro held the phone a foot away from his face and pressed accept.

"WHY DID I HAVE TO HEAR FROM SHANKS THAT YOU FOUND YOUR SOULMATE?!" Perona shrieked. Even with the distance of the phone from his ear Zoro still flinched, "I... Was waiting to tell you in person?"

"That is such bullshit Zoro." Perona snapped. Zoro could hear her tapping her nails against a hard surface in annoyance.

"You promised you would tell me as soon as it happened!" She whined. Zoro snorted, "No, I didn't"

However, Perona went on as if he hadn't spoken, "We're cousins! Close enough to be brother and sister! We were gonna talk about them and I was supposed to meet them! That is so not cute! You have to bring them to meet me! How about today? I'm cleaning the bar this morning and Mihawk and Shanks should be coming in around lunch to help out!"

"Look" Zoro groaned, "I can't get in contact with him, I don't have his number or whatever. I can come and talk to you after I get off tomorrow."

There was a pause and then Perona started giggling. Zoro sighed and mentally went over what he had said. "For fucks sake Perona, you aren't twelve, you know I meant get off of work, don't be ridiculous."

"I've been spending too much time with Shanks." Perona giggled, "I'm not as embarrassed by him anymore, but maybe that's because I'm used to him now. But I can't wait till tomorrow! I want to see your tattoo today! It's your day off right? Come in for lunch."

"I have plans for today." Zoro moaned, dropping his head back onto the pillow. He heard her snort on the other side of the line, "Yeah, sleep, eat, workout, and repeat? You can do that later, come in for lunch, I'll give you two free beers."

"Fine, I'm going to go now, like you said it's my day off and I want to use it, I'll see you later."

"Bye loser."

Zoro threw his phone to the end of his bed and snuggled deeper into his covers. It was days he was able to sleep in that he was glad he'd let Robin and Franky take care of furnishing his room in the house he shared with Nami and Vivi. If it had been up to him, he'd have a dresser and a mattress on the floor. Everything was practical (mostly, that fake fire torch lamp that wasn't so fake had almost caused some accidents) and didn't take up room.

The only reason he hadn't paid an arm and a leg was because Franky had designed and constructed it all out of scraps from his commissions for original furniture. Robin made sure they were actually useful and helpful (how the hell did the lamp get past her?) and wouldn't accidentally kill him. The bed was his favourite part, a frame that had katanas carved into the metal, with a ridiculously comfortable mattress Robin and Chopper had gotten him for a birthday.

He had always been one of those people that insisted he could sleep wherever, and didn't need a pricey mattress. And he could sleep anywhere, it just hurt his back if he slept on a shitty surface too often. And so Chopper and Robin had gotten him a special mattress, and he was addicted to it.

He rolled over and blinked at the clock, willing the numbers to slow down. It wasn't that he didn't want to see Perona, he liked his cousin when she wasn't being morbid, creepy or screeching at him, but his bed was so damn comfortable. He could probably spend all day in it.

There was a loud crash from down the hall.

"GOD DAMNIT, ZORO COME FEED YOUR DAMN CATS"

Never mind.

He sighed and rolled out of bed, almost tripping over his Khao Manee cat, Wado. She blinked her green and blue eyes up at him before walking over to the door and sitting in front of it, flicking her tail.

As Zoro grabbed a hoodie to pull on, Wado was joined at the door by his black Sphynx cat, Yubashiri. Which meant the cat bothering Nami was Kitetsu. Great. Hopefully she wasn't bleeding, he'd be forced to clean the kitchen again.

He stumbled down the hall and into the kitchen, where the rough looking one-eared black Persian was grooming his paw on the counter. Nami was muttering to herself as she swept a broken plate into a dustpan. She glared at him as he walked by her to the fridge.

"I swear, if he knocks over one more plate I'm kicking him out." She hissed.

"You wouldn't." Zoro snorted, "He's an asshole, but you secretly like him. I saw you feeding him dinner scraps last week."

"It's called a bribe. I hate him, and he hates me. It's war." She scowled. Zoro snorted, grabbing the can of wet food from the fridge. Instantly, three small bodies were winding themselves around his legs. He trudged over to the three bowls on the floor next to the dining table, being careful not to kick one of the cats. It had happened before, and he'd felt guilty for a week.

As soon as he started measuring out the food, the cats abandoned his feet and rushed for their bowls. Nami was still glaring at Kitetsu, "I don't know why you keep him."

"He needed a home; I was the only one he didn't bite when I picked him up." Zoro yawned, grabbing a mug from the cupboard, "You didn't complain when I brought him and Yubashiri home, you went out and bought them beds and toys so Wado didn't have to share."

"Wado is different, she's a good cat. And I like the freak more than I like him, at least the freak doesn't growl at me." Nami muttered.

Zoro sighed, "Don't call him a freak, you said it yourself, Yubashiri is an expensive breed. People pay 2 thousand for cats like him. Besides that's what all cats look like without hair, and I didn't see you complaining when he curled up in your lap during the movie last night."

He grabbed a banana and a muffin from the counter and walked over to the breakfast bar, careful to avoid the cat toys that always seemed to end up under the stools.

"He's still freaky looking." Nami sniffed, but smiled as Vivi walked into the kitchen.

"What was all the yelling about?" Vivi asked, walking into Nami's arms, "did Kitetsu attack you again?"

"He knocked over a plate." Nami sighed, "I hate him."

"It's because you're a dog person, cats and dog people just don't get along." Vivi said, reaching for the tea Nami held out to her. Nami nodded, "Maybe if we get a dog the cat won't be so evil, he'll be to busy being scared. We could get a rottweiler."

Zoro snorted, "Kitetsu would eat the dog, sorry but I guess you'll just have to live in fear."

Nami rolled her eyes, turning to watch Vivi rummage through the fridge before turning back to Zoro.

"What if Sanji's a dog person?" Nami asked, glancing at Zoro and sipping her coffee innocently. Zoro glared and tossed the peel of his banana at her. She squeaked and threw it back at him.

"Seriously though," Vivi asked, sitting next to him at the bar, "what if he doesn't like cats or is allergic?"

"Then he wouldn't be my perfect match right? Platonic or otherwise." Zoro muttered into his coffee, "even if he doesn't like cats or whatever, I'm not getting rid of them. Not even Kitetsu."

"Seriously? Even if he attacks your soulmate you wouldn't get rid of that demon spawn?" Nami sighed, leaning on the counter across from them.

"He's not that bad, he hasn't attacked me yet, so I count that as a plus." Vivi said, stealing a bit of Zoro's muffin, ignoring his half-hearted swipe at her.

"That's because everyone loves you." Nami grinned at her. Vivi's smile turned sickeningly sweet as she bumped her shoulder against Nami's and leaned in so their foreheads were pressed together.

"Right, I'm leaving before I get a cavity." Zoro sighed, picking up his mug and walking down the hall.

"You love us!" Nami yelled after him.

"Nope! I'm only here because I have nowhere else to go!" He called back.

He got back into bed and set an alarm for ten thirty. He had nothing to do, so why not sleep. Three small thumps alerted him to the presence of his cats on the bed before they cuddled up next to him.

Zoro banged his fist against the bar door, peering in through the glass. For some reason it had taken him way less time to get here than it usually did. They must have added a shortcut or something, maybe a new road?

"We're not open!" A voice called through the glass.

"So I can go back home and sleep?" Zoro called back.

"No!" There were rapid footsteps before the door was flung open, and he was pulled into the dim interior of the bar. Perona dragged him inside, threw him at a seat at the bar, and raced back behind the bar.

"So? What're they like?" She asked excitedly. He sighed and slid onto a stool and pointed at a beer. She pouted but grabbed the bottle and slide it into his hand while looking at him expectantly.

"He's an asshole." Zoro said, popping the cap off his bottle.

"He's an asshole? That's it? That's everything? What else happened? Luffy barely told Shanks anything!"

"What about me?" Shanks asked, walking into the room, looking up from his phone. He stopped when he saw Zoro and turned back to yell into the office, "Zoro's here."

"Zoro!" Shanks yelled and grinned as he turned around, waving his prosthetic arm in the air. He walked over to the bar and flung himself down next to Zoro, "so?"

Zoro groaned, "might as well wait, I'm not repeating myself a thousand times so everyone can hear the stupid story."

"Who says I even want to hear about this." A low voice asked. Zoro raised his beer as his uncle walked out from the office, his sharp golden eyes glaring at the three of them.

"Because he's our nephew and we love him." Shanks snorted motioning for Mihawk to hurry. The black haired man glared at him and continued at his steady pace. Perona was practically vibrating across from Zoro at the bar, evidently wanting to see his tattoo and hear about her grumpy cousin's soulmate. For all her morbid creepiness, she loved the idea of soulmates and all the true love bullshit.

"Dad can hear from there, now tell!" Perona demanded.

"You know how Nami takes me to those tattoo things? I went to one, and he showed up during my reading, my tattoo coloured and then we fought. Happy?"

"So when's the second date?" Shanks asked. Zoro rolled his eyes and shook his head, "For one, I don't have anyway of contacting him, and two we were around each other for like an hour and I haven't seen him since, how the hell is that a date?"

"Luffy did say you'd gotten into a fight." Shanks laughed, "You guys are gonna have wild s-"

"Shanks" Zoro groaned, cutting him off. Perona sighed and dropped into a stool next to Zoro, "I can't believe I have to call you my father."

"I can't believe I have to call all of you my family." Zoro muttered, grunting when Perona elbowed him. He rolled his eyes at her when she stuck her tongue out at him, "Yes we fought, within an hour of knowing each other. That's definitely not a date."

"Zoro, the men of your family consider fighting foreplay." Shanks smirked, eyes flicking to his unamused looking husband.

Both Zoro and Perona grimaced, Zoro choking on his beer, "I did not need to know that."

"They aren't your dads, be grateful for that." Perona muttered, walking behind the counter again and pouring herself a very generous shot. She tossed it back before looking mournfully at the bottle, "I'll need the whole thing to forget that."

"Oh be quiet, we're two adult men in a happy and healthy relationship and you're an adult, you know we have sex." Shanks snorted, jumping over the counter and reaching past Perona for a glass.

"Doesn't mean I want to hear about it." Perona whined, dropping her head onto the bar.

"Stop torturing our daughter and nephew, and out of three of you, two of you shouldn't be drinking, seeing as you're both working tonight."

"But we have a date tonight." Shanks complained, "I don't want to work."

"I wasn't talking to you." Mihawk rolled his eyes, nodding his head at Zoro, who sighed, "Will I get payed this time?"

"Possibly."

"Possibly won't cut it." Zoro snarked, draining his beer and motioning for the promised second. Shanks shot a challenging look at his husband before grabbing it off the shelf and holding it just out of Zoro's reach.

"You'll get this, and payment for working tonight, when we see that tattoo." Shank's shit eating grin grew as Zoro dropped his head on the wooden bar in defeat.

"Yes! Let's see let's see!" Perona cheered, leaning all her weight on the bar excitedly.

Zoro sighed and stood up, turning his back to his odd family. He pulled his shirt off and stared boredly at the doors to the bar as they awed and oohed over it. Well, Shanks and Perona did.

"It's realistic, not stupid or frilly." Mihawk said, the barest hint of approval in his voice.

"Well, my soulmate is stupid and frilly so there's no real representation there I guess." Zoro snorted, flinching slightly when one of Perona's stupidly long nails dragged over his skin.

"Of course, I'll have to meet this soulmate of yours to judge that for myself." Mihawk muttered, turning to walk back into the office.

"This would look so much better if there was blood near the shark-y thing." Perona sighed wistfully. Zoro groaned and shrugged her fingers off his back, ignoring the small sting from her nails, "Perona, what the actual fuck is wrong with you."

She stuck her tongue out at him and pouted as she flounced off into the employee room. Shanks chuckled, "She's definitely her father's daughter, such a flair for the dramatic. And a little blood thirsty, not that that's all that bad, I don't mind it when your uncle gets a little blood-"

"Nope!" Zoro clapped his hands over his ears and glared at his uncle, "I swear to god, if you continue that sentence I am going to vomit and you'll be the one cleaning that up."

Shanks pouted at him, and Zoro could tell Mihawk wasn't the only one who passed down dramatics to their daughter. And god what a horrible thought that was, Perona was a mixture of his two uncles, oh god….

As if sensing his thoughts Shank's pout turned into an evil smirk, "You know, I think a family dinner might be in order, now that there's a new addition to the family…."

Oh, so Shank's was going down another path. A worse path.

"He already hates me, if he ever meets you lot he'll run for the hills screaming." Zoro muttered, pulling his shirt back on and looking around the empty bar, "So, as much as I hate bar work, it's better than this conversation. What needs to be done?"

Shanks snorted and jerked his thumb over his shoulder, "We just got a delivery of supplies, you know where it goes."

"It's like you knew I was going to be here." Zoro scowled as he walked towards the hall that lead to the back loading area.

"We're just that good" Shanks cackled. Zoro shook his head, not fighting the small smile that was stretching his lips.

A/N:

I thought maybe cats would be a fun way to get Zoro's swords in there. We'll see how that goes. I own a sphynx cat named Smeagol (I'm a dork I know) so I couldn't resist throwing a wrinkle baby in.

So many people were messaging me about how I made Shanks and Makino platonic soul mates, but you see I had this planned, and I needed an example of platonic soul mates.

Hopefully I'll get the next chapter up soon!
Until then :)