Chapter 16
(This chapter will be based on the episode Killer Within -Season 3 Episode 4-)
To say breakfast was awkward was an understatement. In the short time, Lori was downstairs, she had told everyone sitting there about how she found us. On top of that, I was also the strange girl that was alone for, like, 7 months or something like that. Everyone was staring at me and the voice in my head came back. They'll probably kick you out. No way. They will! You fell asleep with the leaders son! But we didn't do anything! We're like, twelve! Yeah but you're so weird, they won't want you around eventually. Don't you know how annoying you are? Am not! Are so! and I cut off the conversation there. When I looked up from my food, everyone had finally stopped staring and were engaged in their own conversations. Everyone except Carl. When I looked up at him, he looked away quickly and blushed. Strange. Finally, the conversations stopped and everyone looked at me again. I prepared myself for the questions.
"Eliza," Rick spoke up.
"Yes, sir?"
"I hope you understand we need to ask you a few things." Of course... I would have to get it over with eventually.
"Yes, I understand." I enjoyed being polite. It was nice to see people surprised at the way I spoke.
"Ok. Well, my first question is how long have you been alone?"
"To be completely honest sir, I'm not sure. I suppose it's around 7 or 8 months?" At this, the whole table began whispering until Rick shushed them. I knew they'd react this way.
"How did you survive that long?" Oh.. Well, it's now or never.
"There was someone. Her name was Clary. She was my next door neighbour. After my parents died a couple days in, she took care of me. Clary taught me how to hunt and take care of myself. I think she knew I would be alone one day but just not as soon as I was. When she." My voice broke at this point but I kept going. "When she died, that was it. It was just me. We had already driven a long way but I left where we were staying and just walked. I never stopped walking. I mean, I'm from North Carolina and now I'm in Georgia. I've just been travelling since and trying to stay alive. Now I'm here. That's about all there is." A single tear slipped down my face and I wiped it away. Everyone looked shocked when I finished. I left out a few details like Connor or the men in the woods but that could be told another time. I couldn't handle talking about Connor or the fire right now.
After breakfast, Lori took me aside. She offered to help me clean myself up. I hadn't even seen what I looked like in forever. I was ecstatic when Lori took me into a bathroom and there a mirror there. God, I was an absolute wreck. My hair was tangled (not unlike a rats nest) but it looked a bit darker than before. Maybe it was just dirt, though. She showed me the showers and even though they weren't hot, I savoured the luke-warm water flowing over my body, washing away all the dirt and blood and cleaning my cuts, even though it stung. I didn't really care. I was clean and that was all that mattered. I stepped out of the shower and got dressed again. I used the brush Lori left me and when I was finished, I looked like a completely different person. My hair was, in fact, not just dirty but a bit darker and I realised I was even a bit taller too. If I'm being honest here, there was even a slight difference on my chest. It wasn't noticeable but it definitely made me happy. I felt a little more grown-up. Maybe for once, I could feel normal. Maybe I could be happy here. Everyone seemed eager to accept me and once I was ready, maybe I could begin to trust them more.
By the time I had finished cleaning up, breakfast had been cleaned up and everyone had left to go about their business. I felt awkward standing in the middle of the room (is that what I should call it? I don't know). After what felt like minutes of being my awkward self, I decided that I would go and see Carl. I bet he has some comic books I would like. He was the only person my age here anyways so I guess I should make friends with him.
"Hey, Carl!" He looked up from his comics and I was happy I didn't scare him this time.
"Wow." What was with him?
"Wow? Wow, what?"
"I-I just mean you look different. Your hairs all longer and well... you look better. N-not that you didn't look nice before!" Seeing him struggle with his words like this was funny but I put him out of his misery.
"Whatever. Got any comics for me?" He visibly relaxed when I changed the subject, though I knew I was blushing just as much as he was.
"Yeah. You like The Avengers?"
"Well, no duh! Who doesn't?" I took the comic he passed to me, Captain America, and once again began reading with him. I was beginning to notice his taste in comics was really similar to StarDestroyer's. He even had the same Science Dog t-shirt. What a coincidence.
Carl and I had been reading for a while when I saw a few men walk past the doorway. I hadn't seen them at breakfast and decided to check it out.
"Hey Carl, I'm gonna head out. Walk around for a bit. See ya'."
"Ok, see ya." Carl was so engrossed with his comic he barely noticed me leaving. I noticed the men were arguing with Rick. Something about their cell block not being as nice as ours? I heard Rick tell them they could either live in their cell block or leave. I decided this didn't concern me and went over to Hershel's cell. When I knocked on the wall, I heard a gentle "Come in." and entered.
"Hello, Eliza." The old man said.
"Hello, Hershel. What's going on?"
"I was just about to take a walk around on my crutches!" I was confused for a moment until I looked down and, for the first time, noticed Hershel's leg was gone!
"Oh my god Hershel! What happened?"
"Nothing to worry about little miss. I was bitten a few days back. What's done is done. It was either the leg or my life."
"I'm so sorry."
"Don't be. It's not your fault. Now, help an old man to his feet." I grabbed Hershel's hands and helped him up. He grabbed his crutches you could've sworn that man had used them his entire life. He was a natural. I followed him around, just exploring in a comfortable silence. When I spotted Lori, I decided to go hang out with her for a bit. I said goodbye to Hershel -who wanted to go outside now anyways- and headed over. I'm not sure why but I just felt like I would like Lori. She was so nice and caring. She would never replace Clary, of course, but she was definitely in my good books.
"Hey, Lori!"
"Hello, Eliza. Need anything?" She cringed a little as she spoke.
"No, I don't but do you?" I couldn't help but be concerned for her and the baby.
"Oh, it's nothing. This baby has been kicking for days. They'll be due any time now." Lori replied with a smile. It would be so great to have a baby here, no matter what challenges it would bring. It would be a small child, uncorrupt by the world. I spent the next few hours with Lori, talking and bonding. I felt so close to her, almost like her daughter. She had even told me she felt the same way. In the short time, we had known each other, she had helped me fit in, relax, and make friends. We eventually went out into the courtyard for some fresh air and a break from the cold, musty prison. The sunshine felt nice on our skin. It wasn't long before something went wrong, though, like always. We were startled from our conversation by screaming and when we turned around, lo and behold, there were walkers coming out of the prison. We were suddenly grabbed my Maggie (who had Carl with her as well) and ran into the prison, away from the walkers. We could hear gunshots and screams all around us until we were cornered and had to hide in the boiler room. Alarms were sounding and there were lights flashing in the corridor as well. I could see Lori was struggling and in pain.
"What are those alarms?" She asked.
(Listen to add emotion.)
"Don't worry about it," Maggie said, guiding Lori to the other side of the room. Carl and I followed them. "Lori, let's lay you down." She continued, seeing her obvious discomfort.
"No." She said. "The baby's comin' now." Carl suddenly spoke up.
"W-we have to get back to our cell block and have Hershel help-" but he was cut off by Lori.
"No, we can't risk getting caught out there." and then Maggie said it.
"You're gonna need to give birth to this baby here." No. No no this is bad. This is very bad. Suddenly, Lori's breathing sped up. It sounded like she was having trouble. I finally spoke.
"What's wrong? Can't she breathe?"
"She's fine," Maggie said. Now speaking to Lori she continued, "Come on let's get your pants off." She then looked up at Carl, me standing behind him, and said, "You're gonna need to help deliver your baby brother or sister, you up for it?" The two of us just nodded. Maggie started talking about stuff like seeing if Lori was 'dilated' when Carl asked if she even knew how.
"Dad told me but trust me, it's my first time." and after looking for a second she said, "I can't tell." Lori suddenly began to stand up.
"I gotta push, I gotta push." She stood up, Maggie reassuring her the whole time. Before any of us could react, she was screaming. Carl grabbed my hand and we held on to each other, feeling absolutely terrified. All we could do was stand there and watch. Maggie said her body knew what to do but I wasn't so sure. She just kept screaming until Maggie spoke up.
"Lori, stop! Don't push! Something's wrong." No! Not now! "You aren't fully dilated yet. No amount of pushing is gonna help."
Lori was out of breath as she spoke.
"I know what it means and I'm not losing my baby. You've gotta cut me open." Carl and I looked at each other in horror as Maggie was talking to Lori.
"No. I can't"
"You don't have a choice."
Carl stood up, saying he would go get a bucket, but Lori stopped him.
"Look, Cara's the one that did that, dad only taught me the steps, Lori."
"Please."
"I have no anaesthetic, no equipment."
"Carl has a knife."
"Well, you won't survive."
"My baby has to survive. Please. My baby. For all of us. Please, Maggie! Please." Lori sounded as desperate as she looked and we all knew there was no other way.
"You see my old C-Section scar?" Lori showed Maggie.
"I can't"
"You can. You have to." Carl and I were kneeling down on either side of her now. "Carl? Baby, I don't want you to be scared ok? Either of you." she said, looking over to me. "This is what I want. This is right." The tears were streaming down both of our faces. "Now, you take care of you daddy for me, alright? And your little brother or sister, you take care of them?
"No, you don't have to do this." He cried but Lori continued, speaking to the both of us. "We are gonna be fine. You are gonna beat this world, I know you will. You are smart, and you are strong, and you are so brave and I love you." Suddenly, a memory flashed into my head. I realised I was basically re-living Clary's death over again and that brought a fresh wave of tears.
"I love you too." I heard Carl say.
"You gotta do what's right baby. You promise you'll both always do what's right. It's so easy to do the wrong thing in this world. So.. So if it feels wrong, don't do it." I had a feeling she was talking about Shane now. "and if it feels too easy, don't do it. Don't let the world spoil you." Her voice cracked here and Carl and I both had tears dripping off our cheeks. "You're so good. My sweet boy. You're the best thing I ever did. I love you." She pulled the two of us into a tight hug. "I love you. My sweet, sweet kids... Ok. Ok now." Carl and I clung tightly to each other as she pushed us away, desperately seeking comfort from the other.
"Maggie, when this is over you're gonna have to do it. You have to do it, it can't be Rick." She took a deep breath. "Alright. Alright. It's alright. It's alright." Carl handed his knife over to Maggie but the two of us never let go of each other. "Goodnight, love."
"I'm sorry," Maggie whispered as she began to cut into Lori's stomach. Carl and I began yelling as Lori let out a gut-wrenching scream.
"Stop it! Stop! You're killing her!" I heard Carl yell as we both watched and Maggie asked us to help. "Carl, gimme your hand. Guys please, I need to keep the sac clean. If I cut too deep, I'm gonna cut the baby." We were crying still, staring at Lori as we helped with the baby. At this point, I think Maggie was talking to herself more than anything. "I see it. I see the uterus. I"m gonna pull em' out. I can't tell if this is the arm or the leg. Ok. I'm gonna pull the baby out." The sounds coming from Lori were awful. It sounded disgusting. All we could whisper was "Ok." and then the baby was out.
"Maggie! Maggie why isn't it crying! Maggie!" I suddenly yelled. I knew babies weren't supposed to come out silent. Until it started crying and it was one of the most beautiful sounds I had ever heard. Carl took off his vest and handed it to Maggie, so the baby wouldn't be cold.
"We have to go," Maggie said but Carl finally spoke up.
"We can't just leave her here. She'll turn." Maggie reached for her gun but Carl stopped her. "No. She's my mum." He said,pulling out his gun. Maggie turned away from us, walking out with the baby.
"Carl? Are you s-sure about this?" I asked him, my voice shaking.
"I need to do it. It needs to be someone who loves her."
"Then I'll stay with you." We both turned back to Lori, staring at her dead body. We instinctively grabbed each others hands and Carl raised his gun. We both flinched as it fired, gripping each others hands with tears streaming down out facing, telling the words we couldn't speak. Maggie only stared as we walked past her without a word.