Give Wolfram Back To Me

A Kyou Kara Maoh Fanfiction.

Disclaimer: I do not own anything but the plot. Otherwise, this wouldn't be a fanfiction.

All rights belong to Tomo Takabayashi, Temari Matsumoto, and Studio Deen

Chapter 25

(Normal POV)

"Well, good for you, Celie, you are the first entry in this diary." Waltorana said sarcastically as he close his eyes in annoyance since it's the question the ex-queen just asked was just repeated.

"You know its contents?" Lady Celie asked shocked. He knows?! But how?! They barely get to see each other since Wolfram was with us and he is at the Bielefeld lands. He rarely visits in the Blood Pledge Castle and Wolfram rarely visit in Bielefeld as well. They can't be that close, can't they... Is that how really poor I give attention to Wolfram that even though we live on the same roof, he never opened up to me like he does with Waltorana?...

"Like I said, I know Wolfram and he knows he can trust me... and that I won't judge him. That means, he open up to me. And yes... I know the contents of that little diary." Waltorana replied. How could he not? Whenever Wolfram will visit him in his lands or he will visit his nephew in the capital, that diary and its contents will always be in their conversation.

Wolfram may not be as open to the other people as to him... that's why he make sure that when Wolfram opens up to him, he will be there for him whatever he will say... may it be to comfort him if it's devastating or to encourage him and praise him if he tell about an achievement or just smile with him if ever they will just talk about a happy moment.

Oddly, Wolfram isn't speaking at all. His head bowed down, his bangs hiding his face. Damian knows that Wolfram is doing this on purpose. Damian actually understand what Wolfram is going through right now.

The whole family is here, bonus for the other main character in Wolfram's diary... they're talking about the contents of that diary... he has the diary in his hands at the moment... which give him the conclusion that Wolfram is finally about to reveal to his family who he really is. Not the forced and fake Wolfram they've known him to be. But of course, it's not that easy. Hell! He even thinks that it will make Wolfram feel better if the ground just open up and swallow him whole.

From his position, Damian saw one of Wolfram's eyes looking at him... as if asking for him to help him. Well, he isn't about to turn down a request from the most beautiful and almost in perfection being in the world... Heck! Just even thinking of turning him down is a crime itself!

He took a deep breath and cleared his throat softly. " Well, I hope you're ready for the worst, everyone. You're just about to meet the real Wolfram von Bielefeld." he said and opened the diary to the first entry. "Umh... I recommend as well that everyone find somewhere to sit steadily." he said. And they did as they were recommended. Then he looked at Lady Celie with eyes full of pity and sorry. Lady Celie swallowed as she noticed this.

"Oh, and before I start. This is certainly not an ordinary diary where you'll find daily happenings or something. It also doesn't start with the usual Dear diary, or something like that." Damian said and they all nodded.

"Well, here goes nothing... *deep breath*

The 26th Maou of Shin Makoku, Queen Cecilie von Spitzweg, or my mother in short. She is the most beautiful woman you would ever see. Her gold-like blond hair in perfect curls past her hips will remind you of the color of the sun. Her verdure green eyes will make you drown in them by just looking. Her perfect body, her curves will make you beg for her attention even just a glance.

She has many friends and many suitors as well. People like her and she just has that interacting skills which I wish I had. She has all the time in the world for every person in need and even just the people that wants her attention. She's so amazing being able to enjoy her social life, going to parties... living her life to the fullest she can, even though she has her duties as the maou.

Everyone likes her. She's unpredictable, she's cheerful, she's energetic, she's optimistic, she's beautiful, she's powerful, she's loved, she's popular, she's just amazing... and I would never wish for any other woman to be my mother but her.

I just wish that she would pay attention to me as well. I'm not saying that she doesn't but... I feel like she's not paying attention to me like a mother would. I don't know but I just feel... neglected... abandoned... ignored.

Yes, she gives me toys... clothes... everything and anything that I want. But I'm not really satisfied with these 'materials'. Heck! I don't even ask for them... All I want is for my mother to spend time with me just like a mother should to her son. I wish she would take even just a little break from her duties and her parties to go and see me. What I want is her attention and love. Not all these things that may just get broken, lost, stolen, or replaced.

Well, she does spend time with me... she would come to see me sometime if she has free time. But all she does is talk to my nanny, asking how I've been... what happened... or something like that. If she would spend time with me, she will pull me in her room and start to put girl clothes on me. Saying how great could it be if I was just born a girl instead since she really wanted to have a daughter.

I put up to it. I let her dress me so girly and others. If this is what I have to endure just to spend time with my mom... it's a little thing. Whenever she will put on a new outfit on me, she would smile so brigth, it's like she's shining. And I love it when my mother is happy. I love it when she smiles and I love it more that I'm the reason why she's smiling.

I know she always wanted a daughter... most of the time when I spend time with her, I become the 'daughter' she always wanted even if it's just for a few minutes. If this is what it takes to make her happy and for her to spend time with me.

And besides, I'm pretty sure she really wanted me born as a girl, not a guy, which I am. I mean she already has Conrad and Gwendal as her sons... and they are both great sons and I'm sure mother I so proud of them.. I mean Gwendal is very smart. He's also a great sword and maryoku wielder. He has great control of his emotions and he just has that air that speaks of authority and demands respect. He's also very efficient and organized in his work. I really look up to him.

Conrad, on the other hand, has this gentle smile and a very kind attitude. He's also a great swordsman, I could only wish I have even just half of his ability in wielding swords. Both of my brothers are good-looking as well. And me, I'm nothing. I'm just another son that has nothing special. My brothers already have it all. What do I have to compete with them? My unbelievable resemblance to my mother or to Shinou?

If I could turn back time, I would wish that I was born a girl... so that even though I'm nothing but a third child... I can still have something that my brothers doesn't have. And besides, mother always wanted a daughter to accompany her and do girly stuff. But fate certainly has other plans.

But then she became busier and busier. She barely come to see me. Then the time came that I almost wished I had a different mother, someone who has time for me... but I blocked that thought. I shouldn't think about her that way. I should understand that she also has her duties as the maou. She practically has to take care of a 'whole kingdom.'

I would often just watch her do her work, sitting on one of the chairs in her office or just stare at her from afar. I often see the other children of the servants in the castle spending time with their mother. I'm so jealous of them. They may not have the wealth, but they're happy.

Well, she still attend parties... she would even take me and my big brothers. But whenever she does, she always gets too absorbed in mingling with the other guests than paying attention to us. Everytime she does that, I always wish that I'm just another guest... at least she would take the time to entertain me, to pay attention to me.

Then one day, she decided to step down the throne... many were sad but I was ecstastic. Now that mother doesn't have to perform her maou duties, she finally have more time with me. Or at least, that's what I thought. But then, she actually doesn't stay much in the castle. She goes cruising and travelling around the world searching for 'FREE-LOVE'.

I don't understand. Why does she have to go out there and travel the world to find love... when all the love she can have is in the castle. I have all the love I can give. Is it not enough for my mother? Is the love from her son not enough? Or she just doesn't see it? I thought that when she finally have the time, she would actually come to see me and spend time with me. But I guess I was wrong. I will always just watch her as she board her ship and wave goodbye at us with a smile on her face.

Don't get me wrong... I don't want my mother to change... I just want her to be a mother more.

I know how childish it is for someone my age to yearn for a mother's love but... I can't help it, maybe it's because I barely get any of it when I was a child. But still, I want to experience it. To spend time with my mother and just chat about things. Enjoy each other's company.

I waited for her to stop searching for love but it never came and I lost all hope she would. I started distancing myself from her... I started to think that it doesn't really matter if she cares for me or not now. I've already grown up... she wasn't even there to witness it. Now, I don't force myself on her... because, imprinted in my mind like a permanent tatoo, that if I force myself on her and she doesn't pay attention or worse reject me. I don't so that I won't feel ignored...

But I can't deny that deep within me, my heart still shouts, begging for attention from her. My soul still yearns for a mother's love. My whole being silently aches for this need. Silently, I'm still hoping that she would finally notice me and make it up for me eventually. But everyday, every hour and every minute, that hope gets crushed... but it still never vanished.

How could it vanish? No matter what I do, even if I turn the world upside down and make oceans part... she is and always will be my mother. Someone who occupies a big part of my life... and I just wish I am to her as well. And still I just wish that one day, magically, my wish will come true. Because I still have a lot of love to give to her.

I love you, mother... No matter what."

Damian looked up from the diary and wipe the tears that escaped his eyes with his sleeves. He then looked at Wolfram, who still has his head bowed down, but it's obvious that he's crying since he can see tears falling. He then looked at the rest of the party. Their faces, their eyes screams out one emotion. The strongest coming from the subject of the first entry.

"W-Wolfram" she started... her voice quivering. "I- I'm so sorry..." she went and held Wolfram's shoulders ever so gently. "I never knew you felt like this." she said between sobs. She cupped Wolfram's cheeks ang slowly lift her youngest son's face.

She kissed his forehead and hugged him tight. He hugged back. Wolfram buried his face on his mother's neck while his mother buried her face on his hair. More tears fell, not just from the two but from everyone on the room.

"Please know that I never wanted you to feel that way." Lady Celie said. "You are so not nothing. You are very special Wolfram... don't say you can't compete with your brothers because you can. Don't look down on yourself." she started stroking her son's hair.

"And please, don't ever think that you're insignificant to me. You're very special to me... I care for you. I love you... you may be a third son... but you ARE MY THIRD SON. I could only wish now that you didn't feel that way towards me. Because that's not how you are to my eyes... I love you... you're my son... my baby. And you'll always be no matter what age you are." she kissed the top of Wolfram's head.

Wolfram clutched at her mother's clothes as if she's gonna lose her and just cry... not uttering a word. These scene actually warms my heart... finally... his mother now knew about how Wolfram see things in his point of view.

One down! And many to go!

(To Be Continued)