A/N Thank you for the reviews/alerts/ favorites. Hope you like this chapter. Don't forget to review I love reading them. Till next time. :)
"Excuse me?" I said, not believing what I had just heard. "Did you say interfacing?"
"Yes," the Autobot medic replied. "You are with Ionhide now, and it's my duty as a doctor to explain to you how interfacing works."
He can't be serious right? I mean, I know he's a doctor and that it's his duty to explain these kinds of things, but I'm thirty years old for crying out loud.
"Ratchet, I'm thirty years old; I think I know how it works" I said.
"Yes, when it comes to interfacing between humans, but when it comes to interfacing between Cybertronians and humans you don't know nothing," Ratchet said. "Now pay attention," he said, as he inserted the CD into the computer. Suddenly a Cybertronian hologram appeared in front of me.
"Now, let's start," Ratchet said. "Interfacing between Cybertronian and human is called mating, but interfacing between two Cybertronians is called well, interfacing" he said. "There are two ways how Cybertronians can mate with h,umans; they could use their holoforms or they could change their size and be almost the same height as human" he said, pressing the button on the computer. I watched as the hologram began to shrink in front of me.
Ok, so far so good. Nothing scary, I thought.
"As you know, our holoform can't produce CNA when overload ergo it is the safest way to mate because you can't get pregnant. But if you chose the other option I recommend withdrawal, because birth control don't affect us and you'll get pregnant," Ratchet continued to explain.
This is not so bad I thought to myself. I thought it would be much worse.
"Now, I want to show you where our sensitive parts are," he continued, as he pulled out a pointing stick from the table drawer.
I spoke too soon or in my case I thought too soon.
"Our sensitive parts are here, here, here and here," he said, pointing at the helmet or to be more accurate on the antennas on top of the helmet, neckline, chest and thigh. "However, it can vary from Cybertronian to Cybertronian."
Alright, now I'm starting to feel uncomfortable. Please God, let this be the last lesson I thought nervously looking around.
"And now we come to my favorite topic," Ratchet said proudly. "I will tell you about our interfacing rods or just rods."
Oh dear God no. Don't get me wrong I was not uncomfortable with the subject, I was uncomfortable with him explaining this to me. I know he's a doctor, but he is Ironhide's friend first and some borders are not to be crossed.
"As you see, our interfacing devices are located between our legs behind the codpiece; when you remove the codpiece it will expose our rod," Ratchet said, as he pressed another button on the computer and the codpiece disappeared from the holoform and the rod appeared in front of me.
"WHOA!" I said, as I raised my hand in front of me trying not to look, but to no avail. Their penises were very similar to those to the human males, but instead of skin they were covered with silicone rubber.
"What's wrong, you act like you never seen a rod before," Ratchet said, looking at me.
"No," I muttered. "I've seen it before, but this is wrong on so many levels," I said.
"I don't understand; why?"
"Because you are Ironhide's friend and it's just wrong."
"Well, too bad and as you humans like to say suck it up," he said, in a serious tone. "Now where were I? Oh yes, the rod is covered with silicone rubber and beneath the silicone are a multitude of sensors similar to those of nerve endings in humans; the surface of the rod is covered with grooves for extra stimulation and pleasure."
My God, he's enjoying this I thought to myself. At this point I was ready to take a screwdriver and stick it into my skull.
"When aroused the rod extend to its full length; once the rod is at full length the only way to get rid out of it is to overload it; after overload the rod produces transfluid. The transfluid is purple fluid and it's not dangerous for humans. I guess you know what happens then? "
"Yes," I mumbled quietly.
I never felt so embarrassed in my entire life.
"Good," Ratchet said. "Now for double pleasure you have to stimulate the spark and the rod at the same time…."
Suddenly there was the knock on the door.
Saved by the knock.
"Come in," Ratchet said, as he ejected the CD.
The door opened and Ironhide entered. I was so happy to see him. I jumped from the chair, ready to get the hell out of there.
"Ah Ironhide, just the mech I wanted to see," Ratchet said, as he approached him.
"I came to take Miss. Jones home," Ironhide said, looking at me.
"Bumblebee can drive her home," Ratchet said, as he put his servo around Ironhide's shoulder, dragging him toward the big metal chair. "Miss. Jones you are free to go," he said. "Ironhide and I are going to have a little chat."
I watched as the door of the med bay slowly close, and deep down I knew about what the conversation will be.