Chapter 15

Dedication: hereisaunicorn, thanks as always for your continued encouragement! I'd also like to dedicate this to my friend and dedicated reader Taarini, thanks for your support.

Note: My lovely reviewer babekitt said that Bonnie should be a vampire and have magic, but as you all know, this just isn't possible - yet. See, as demonstrated by Bonnie's mother, witches cannot simultaneously be vampires unless they are siphoners. I am trying to play by the rules that have already been established in the series and although I might twist them here and there, their premise will mostly remain the same. Anyway, I hope you enjoy this chapter. I worked really hard on it and I'm actually really proud of this one. A lot of the loose ends still remain untied but I'm working on it. Please leave your reviews to let me know what you think and also leave any questions you may have because I'll try to answer them next chapter. Now, go read!

Ps. I know the whole Elena thing is sad, but don't worry too much, I'm sure I'll make up for it later. ;)

Bonnie, Elena and Caroline sat in silence, all draped in a warm blanket, like old times. It seemed as though they were all sixteen again, although now, Caroline had been a vampire for years, Elena was a doppelganger, ex-vampire who would be trapped in a sleeping-beauty state soon and Bonnie was a miserable ex-witch-turned-vampire who couldn't think of anything but blood. Yet, here they sat, all cosy on Bonnie's couch in complete, calm silence, all knowing that this was the last time things would ever be that simple.

The guilt Bonnie felt had lessened considerably once Elena had whispered those two words to her. "It's okay." Even though she knew it would never truly be 'okay', it brought her peace. At least now she knew her best friend didn't hate her. Bonnie glanced at Elena. She looked peaceful. Happy. Content. She smiled at Bonnie as if she read her mind. Bonnie smiled back, and then turned her attention to Caroline who was in a much worse condition. Silent tears were falling down her cheeks as she rested her head on Elena's shoulder. When she noticed Bonnie's concerned gaze, she quickly brushed the tears away and sat up.

"I think Damon and Stefan should be here," she muttered, smiling weakly at Bonnie and Elena before leaving the apartment quickly.

Elena looked worried. "Do you think she'll be okay?"

Bonnie nodded. "She's been through a lot, but I'm pretty sure Stefan and the twins will help her out."

Elena sat up, surprisedly and Bonnie laughed. "You don't know. Caroline had Alaric's twins."

Elena's eyes widened, and Bonnie realised she was making it even more confusing. "Stefan's heretic girlfriend put Alaric and Jo's babies inside her."

Elena stared at her in confusion. "What's a heretic?"

Bonnie sighed.

"You know what," Elena said. "It doesn't matter. Look, how about we talk about the elephant in the room for a second here."

Bonnie wished they didn't have to, but she wanted to honor Elena's wishes.

"There's nothing to talk about," Bonnie said dismissively. "I'll be honest, on my end, I did have feelings for him, but it's not like I can't control them."

"Bonnie," Elena said, grabbing Bonnie's hand. "You listen to me. You're going to live your life. You're going to live as long as you want to, be it thirty more years or a thousand. He's going to do the same. It's not my place to tell you what to do, but believe me, trying to control your feelings never works out. If anything, it makes them stronger. Don't fight them."

Bonnie felt her eyes burn, partly because of Elena's words and partly because she could smell her human blood. "Someday, when I'm gone, you'll be back. Someday, you'll be with him. Someday, you'll both be happy."

Elena flinched. Clearly this caused her more pain than she was letting on.

"I'm not going to stand in the way of 'someday'."

Elena suddenly looked frustrated. She stood up. "Don't you see, Bonnie? There is no 'someday'? Not anymore. You're his 'someday'. You're his 'today'. You both may not see it. Hell, you may never see it. But I do. Sure, I'll have my 'someday', but I already know that it's not going to be with him."

Bonnie was taken aback. "What do you mean?"

"I love Damon. I do. And I know he loves me, but I'm not the only one. I don't know if I ever was. The point is, you're the one for him. You're the one who can bring him back when he reaches his darkest, not me. Stefan told me everything; about the dream world and all, and it makes sense. I understand. Now, please, I'm asking you as my last wish to my best friend. Be happy. Don't let me stand in the way of that. I'm done being selfish. You deserve this." Bonnie just stared at her until she was done. She couldn't think straight. All she could manage was a nod.

"Promise me you'll be happy. Promise me." Elena sounded desperate.

"I – I promise," Bonnie said shakily, finally breaking down. Wow, her emotions really had been hightened. Elena hugged her, but quickly pulled away. She closed her eyes.

"I haven't got much time," she said sadly. She opened her eyes. "I love you, Bonnie. I should go see Caroline and the others. Goodbye." Bonnie hugged Elena again, unable to find the words to explain how thankful she was. Thankful for their friendship, thankful for this conversation, thankful for her existence. She had made a promise and she intended to keep it. She would find a way to be happy, even if she was a vampire. She would find a way to be happy even though her best friend was gone because of her. But most importantly, she would find a way to be happy, with or without Damon Salvatore.

Damon was halfway through his bourbon bottle when Elena returned. They were in what Enzo had said was 'Bonnie's favourite café'. He, admittedly, had cringed slightly when he realised that they were still together. He was good for her. He was nice, protective, brave and would do anything for her, but Stefan had told Damon about the whole Lily situation. Although Enzo's feelings for Bonnie were clearly strong, they weren't enough to pull him back from the edge. Although he hoped Enzo made Bonnie happy, some sad, sadistic part of him wanted nothing more but for the relationship to end. Okay, maybe not just a small part of him.

Elena hugged Stefan, then Caroline, then even Enzo, before she reached Damon.

"Don't be afraid," she whispered when she got to him. He knew she was talking about his relationship with Bonnie. Then, her eyes closed firmly. For a second, he thought she was about to collapse, but she only swayed.

"It's time," she said gravely.

Caroline steadied her. "I'll take her back," she said to the others, her voice quivering. "You guys should stay here."

Damon nodded. He kissed Elena. He knew, deep down, it was a goodbye kiss. Maybe the last one they would ever share. He knew that no matter how hard he tried, no matter what he did, they would never be Damon and Elena again. There was nothing but love there between them, but it wasn't the same. It wasn't romantic. It was simply two people who cared about each other. Genuinely cared about each other.

And with Bonnie – well, with Bonnie, he didn't know. But for the first time in his life, Damon was willing to find out.

Bonnie couldn't waste anymore time sulking over being a vampire. She couldn't waste time feeling sorry for herself, feeling sorry for Elena and thinking about Damon. She'd never been the emotional kind, not even now when everything was heightened. She'd had her moment to think and to cry and now it was time to be strong. It was time to find out who did this to her. And when she did, there was no way in hell they were escaping with their lives.

Do not cross Bonnie Bennett.

Certainly not after the past few months. Bonnie was no longer the self-sacrificing small town girl she had been. She was powerful and with that power came ruthlessness that she couldn't control. That she didn't want to control. She was stronger than she had ever been, despite having less control over herself than she'd ever had. She took a deep breath and swore to herself:

No more guilt.

No more crying.

No more weakness.

She needed to find who did this to her and destroy them. Everything else would have to wait.

She decided that the new Bonnie Bennett would be open to happiness, like she'd promised, but sure as hell wasn't about to depend on it.

She hated depending on anything and in that moment, she swore that she would never do it again.

She didn't realise at the time that her biggest strength was also her biggest weakness.