The next morning, Hope feels like someone in a dream.
What happened? There were fireworks-my birthday?-old friends...
For a brief moment, it seems as if his 18th birthday happened to someone else, in a story he once read, long ago. As he swings his legs heavily over the bedside, the angst and rebellious attitude is snug to fit in to. My past was real. My parents are wrong. They know the answers, and they aren't helping me.
One note on his bedside nightstand washes the bitterness away. Blurry eyes discern a folded piece of paper on the otherwise utilitarian smooth surface. Trying to focus on the item out of place, Hope rubs grime from the corner of his eye and looks to the cramped, scrawled handwriting.
Meet me at our place. -Light
Hope's stomach drops. He can't breathe.
All he can think is one thing: Today is the day of reckoning.
With a loud WHOOP!, the boy jumps up, raising the note high into the air in a fist. He can't get to the beach fast enough.
Someone remembered Hope's car had been parked on a beach embankment last night, and had brought it back home for him. Probably one of his parents, assuming that they had all left to go to his party in the same vehicle with Rydea. He had given them a spare key to his car, just in case, long ago.
Fortunately, the Dodge Nitro was parked exactly in the same space where it should be, saving time and trouble. "Thank you," Hope murmurs hurriedly to the cosmos, thankful that his morning can start easier now that he doesn't have to go searching for a possibly impounded vehicle.
The front driver's door is unlocked, and his key ring is lying on his seat. Here lies the second note of the morning. Have a good day. -Mom
Oh, he plans on having a great one.
With the help of a little EDM to help speed him on his way to the beachside, he makes it to the beach ramp that is so familiar to him these past three years. He doesn't remember the drive in all the excitement, but as he pulls up next to an impressive tricked out Hyundai, Hope does glance at the dash for the time before shutting off the ignition-10:02.
Pounding waves assail him as he pops open his door and steps out, mountain boots thudding as they hit the gravel. The little ramp is on a shoulder right next to the two-lane beach road, and cars shoot by as he jingles his keys into his pocket and makes his way round the front of the car.
"You look like someone right out of a Folgers commercial." The most familiar voice in the world, one that he hadn't heard for eighteen years until last night, calls out playfully from the split-log rail in front of him.
Hope pauses for a moment mid-stride, just letting the surreal moment sink in. The sun is half-risen over the waves, limning the water in frothy white. Against the sounds of the ocean and gulls crying, and the traffic intermittently going by behind him, is the sound of the person he has missed more than all of the others combined.
The mid-morning sun also hits Light's unusual hair, one side longer than the other, falling in waves over her left shoulder. She's dressed in civ clothes today, in a collared white tank top and cut-off jean shorts, frayed edges and all. She's wearing boots too, black scuffy things laced all the way up to her knee. Her back is to him, and as he rounds the front of his SUV, he can see the light playing off face of her face, lining her profile. Her hands are folded across her chest, and she has one knee up, resting against the parking rail that abuts the parking lot ramp.
"H-how long have you been waiting here?" Hope asks, making his way to her side and leaning next to her on the rail.
"I don't know. What time is it?" She asks, turning her head and smirking ever so slightly.
Hope looks at the underside of his wrist to his watchface. "Almost 11."
Light shrugs, turning back toward the tide. "I've been here long enough."
Her vagueness is slightly irritating. Hope frowns, brows drawing down into a severe V. "Well, I guess today's the day. Today's the day you reveal where the hell all of you have been for the past 18 years, and decided to just suddenly show up. Today is the day where I'm no longer regarded as a basket case."
"If your parents really thought that you had been missing a few screws, you would have gotten counseling, and would have been on meds since the time you were a child." Light remarks.
Hope tugs on his flannel. "That's NOT an answer!" He rounds on her, the comfortable anger eagerly awaiting him just buried under the surface of his control.
Light is unprovoked at the shoulder-heaving youth by her side, and just calmly switches from foot to foot, propping her other knee on the rail behind her.
"You're right. It isn't. But I am here to keep my promise. Against my better judgement, but a promise is a promise."
" 'Against your better judgement?' Just what the HELL is that supposed to mean?" Hope exclaims, then furrows a hand through his unkempt bedridden hair. He didn't even shower, he was so anxious to finally receive answers. He had just barely thrown some clothes on, and he was out the garage door.
"Only this." Light is somehow dangerously close to him, too close, and Hope takes a half step back, hands coming up. Light pauses, sees the defensive posture, looks...sad?...and then backs off slightly.
"Did you listen to anything Fang and I were discussing last night? About how I wanted to you to have a good childhood for at least once in your two lives? Today it ends. That's not how I would want it. I wanted...to protect you." Her hands clench up at her sides, upper arms vibrating with tension. "If it were up to me, you would continue on your normal life. Even if you had to go on believing you were crazy your entire life...even if we could never officially meet..."
"How is that supposed to be friendly, again? I'm confused. That sounds awful. I would be living a lie and probably go crazy with my memories to boot. I'm glad to be finally getting the truth. I'll deal with it, whatever it is." Hope looks out to sea, sighs, and leans back on the rail himself, shoulders slumping. "I'm ready to be an adult."
There is nothing but the sounds of the wind and waves for a beat, then Light says quietly, "That sounds like something you'd say. We had a vote. All of us."
"A-a vote?" Hope repeats, dumbfounded. "About what?"
"About you. A long time ago. I was the only one in favor of letting you live your life without our interference, or to give you an insight into Bhuinvelze's presence entering this life again..."
Bhunivelze. Just the name sends shivers through Hope's spine, and his mind flashes through a cascade of pictures, as if someone had just opened up a graphic novel in front of him, and flipped through all of the glossy prints in rapid succession. It's a name associated with absolute horror and darkness. Unbeknownst to Hope, a single tear forms from one eye and trickles down the side of his face. With trepidation, he whispers, "Bhunivelze?"
Light is talking, but he can't hear. He grips his arms tighter, fingerless gloves squeezing until the knuckles turn white.
"HOPE ESTHEIM! HOPE!" Light is screaming, but the words only vaguely connect, and it isn't until she starts shaking him that he slowly comes to, shaking his head slowly back and forth.
Everything is a blur, and the intensity with which hearing and seeing come back to Hope is almost earth-shattering. Suddenly, the crashes of the beachside come roaring back to life, and Hope focuses on blue eyes worriedly staring into his.
"Are you okay?" Light asks breathlessly, slightly crouching so that she is at level with him. He nods, gulping air.
"Yeah, just...just give me a minute." He walks to the nearest rock, leaning one hand heavily on its surface. Light gives her old comrade some air, as he grips his knee and regains focus.
"Bhunivelze, my old enemy. So much pain..." A spasm jerks through his back, and he cries out, whipping his torso straight and grabbing his back with phantom surges of pain.
"Hope!" Light comes over to his side, gently placing her hand over his. "Hope, do you need to see a doctor? I can drive your car and take you to the hospital, there's one nearby..."
"No. No...I guess you're right. I guess it's a good thing that I can only remember bits and pieces of the past. If a lot of time went by where I was feeling like this, no wonder I came into this world trying to block it out."
"He, he was my enemy too. I remember some of the pain you've been living your whole life trying to forget." Her words are soft now, careful. "That's one of the reasons I didn't want to tell you. They say that the truth hurts...in your case, that's more fitting than anyone could ever know."
"You're still right to tell me, though. I want to remember. If...you say he's coming back?" Hope asks, more tears forming, but blinking furiously to repress them.
"We've had...reports. A lot of us from the old world chose to go into the military in this life for a reason. This way, if there was any...unexplained unusual activity that threatened the world, we would be the first to be declassified. We would be the first line of defense. I guess old habits die hard. We were protectors before, it was so easy for us to fit into those same roles when we crossed over."
"What do you mean, 'unexplained unusual activity?'" Hope can breathe a bit easier now, thanks to the big lungfuls of sea air, and stands up straighter, wiping his palms on the back of his faded blue jeans.
Light bows her head. "I'm sure you've heard the stories growing up. Strange things coming from the sky that no one can explain. Unidentified activity, like...they call them UFO's or strange sightings or unexplained phenomena here. All of that is simply ridiculous, of course. Most of what you have heard is simply that...lunatic rantings and ravings. But there are some...some that elude what can possibly be. Those are the things we are worried about. Those are the things we are investigating, so see if there are any stirrings from the beyond."
Hope laughs. "You mean those old tales I heard when I was a child? You can't be serious, Light. Bhunivelze..." Here he shivers at saying the name aloud, "is gone. Vanished. A relic of the past. He can't touch us here. We're safe. That was the point of coming here, right? To escape..." As he speaks, long-forgotten occurrences dredge up from beneath, like ghosts from an undersea lake. "Yeah. That's what happened. I sort of remember now." He lays his fingertips on the rock, tracing a pattern in the cracks. "That...feels right. Banishing an old presence...conquering an old enemy by refusing his presence and moving to another place."
"And you don't remember all of it, then." Light furrows her brows, trying to control her anger being roused at having been told her choice of profession, beliefs, and the things she had experienced since living in this new reincarnation are ridiculous. "Hope, I can't expect you to understand right now." She exhales, trying to reach her calm. "It's a lot to take in. Yesterday you thought I was just a possible myth. Now I'm here, now you've become an adult, and now I'm telling you today that the things that go bump in the night have the possibility of being responses from an old enemy trying to reach us from the other side."
Hope has lived his entire life in this plane with one method of realism, with one method of thinking. He has been at war with his private thoughts for so long, he hadn't known what was real. It seems as though hearing what is actually occurring doesn't help matters much. He is the literal juxtaposition of worlds, and one part of his Earth-reared brain refuses to accept that anything other than his American bred life is out there. The other half; the older, repressed half, is slowly nodding silent agreement with what Light is saying.
There can't be any peace, Hope realizes now. He had wished for the truth, and upon hearing it, it is not the balm to soothe his aches that he always wanted. Instead, he finds the same split inside tearing him in two.
"You're right, Light. It's not even noon and you telling me about the fact that there is an old, vengeful god from our home planet still out there is a bit much for me to digest right now."
"He will always be out there. We knew that when we banished him, and ourselves. We will never be rid of him. I know my place, and so do the others. The war will never stop. But it is a burden we will gladly take up to protect everyone else. We are the only ones who know, who remember. Those that were integral to helping send Bhunivelze back into the chaos still cling to the knowledge of what happened, of why this world came into being, of why we are here. Everyone else leads a blissful, ignorant life." She turns back to the sun, placing a gentle hand on Hope's shoulder. "We must make sure that everyone else sleeps. We don't want the people to wake up. They are the ones encased in crystal now, Hope. We are the silent guardians, protecting, ever watchful, over their slumber. I had wanted peace, so at first, I rebelled against my fate." She clenches her hand to her chest, bowing her head. "I came, WE came, to this world to sleep, too. I didn't want to stay awake, scanning the horizon for trouble, anymore. I wanted to lay down my arms. But now I know that's just the price we paid. I think it's worth it. For now, we bought some time. It's enough to know that if he ever comes back, we can defeat him again. We always will. What has been before, shall pass again. Over and over. We are on one side, he is on the other..."
"Enough." Hope pushes her away, slightly, and Light inhales as Hope walks off a few paces, back turned. "I said I couldn't take any more. Why do you keep on? Just...just give me a moment. This is all too much to take in. I didn't ask for any of this. I don't want this..."
Light sighed. "That's what I told them. That's what Fang and I were talking about. You're right to feel this way. This is how I felt, too. You, of all of us, deserved the most peace. You could maybe sleep, because of your memories and how you came into this world still a baby, innocent."
"I SAID STOP!"Hope cries out, whirling on his friend. He gets what he asks for, for Light, upon seeing the green eyes flashing, closes her lips and exhales deeply through her nostrils.
There is a tense pause, Hope's chest heaving.
"I-I'm sorry...I know there's nothing you can do. You have no choice. I get that. I just need...a little more time." The boy says, scratching his arm.
"Understood, soldier." Light smiles, and for a moment, she is taken aback by the fact that instead of having to bend down to look into Hope's gaze, she has to tilt her chin up. He's grown, she thinks. Then she snaps herself out of her reverie. That's silly. Of course he has. He just turned eighteen. He probably isn't done growing up, either.
Light thinks for a moment, not wanting this meeting to end like this, wanting to part on a good note.
"Hey...seeing as how you told me earlier you'd just woken up...you wanna grab breakfast?" The warrior woman asks, cheeks faintly blushing, trying to change the subject. The kid had a lot to take in on an empty stomach, and she had wanted to break it to him gently. It definitely hadn't turned out as she had planned, so she fell back to what soldiers focused on in the field when things went wrong-their next meal.
Hope places a hand lightly on his flat stomach, grinning wryly. "Now that you mention it...yeah. Food sounds great."
Happy that now they are on a more friendly footing, Light grins. "Great. I'll drive."
"Nuh-uh."Hope shakes his shaggy head, holding his other palm up. "Not while I have the keys."
"For now." Light feints a quick grab at the jingling ring that Hope produces from his pocket, but Hope snatches the keys away before Light can make the catch.
"I rode with you last night. Now it's your turn. I'll let you chose the place. Let's go."
Light sighs, tossing a spiky lock out of her vision. "At least you haven't lost any of your stubbornness."
Hope guffaws as they turn toward the Nitro, and almost loses his balance as he plants his feet on the soft gravelly soil. "ME? Stubborn? Coming from YOU? Now that's rich!"
Light just huffs, but Hope catches the barest whisper of a smile that touches her lips before she rounds the front of the vehicle and the top of the Nitro shields the lower half of her face.
With a loud CHIRP! The alarm disengages and the two pile in, slamming their doors in succession.
Hope slides his fingerless gloves over the top of the wheel after he switches on the ignition, letting his trusted baby for the past two years hum to life. "So," he sighs, easing back into his seat with a practiced adolescent lounge and glancing at the beach road behind them in the side mirror. "Where you wanna go?"
"This isn't a date." Light blurts out before she can think, and immediately regrets her timing and words. She can feel the blush creeping up her neck. She closes her eyes and bows her head, refusing to look at her old partner.
To her embarrassment and anger, Hope starts laughing. Startled, she opens her eyes and whips her head to look at him, the sunlight bouncing off his hair as he chortles.
"Sorry...I'm not laughing at you." He makes out in between fits of laughter, holding up his hands in defense at seeing the smolder behind her expression. "I...ah...never said this was a date. I'm just taking you out to breakfast, letting you choose the location. It's a meeting between old friends. Yeah." The more he talks, the more Hope realizes that he's not helping the situation. What he's describing sounds EXACTLY like a date. This is frustrating. If Light were a guy, none of this would be happening. But now that she's broken the ice, the fact that Hope is an adult now and they are of a differing sex throws the sitch into startling clarity. He decides to stop talking, letting his sentence end and just choosing not to let it continue. Instead, he clears his throat. Which, in the silence of the car, is even more unsettling and awkward.
"IHOP is fine." Light provides, just thinking of the nearest and most commercially breakfast oriented restaurant in order to get them on the road and maybe start talking about something else. How did this happen? One minute she was discussing the events of the past eighteen years-albeit reluctantly-with her old comrade, and the next they are having a most awkward silence when the subject of dating gets thrown around.
And it's all my fault. I really made a spectacle of myself. Way to go, Light. Hope is backing out onto the roadway, and she twists her fingers in her lap. Why did I mention that this isn't a date? Of course it isn't, that's not what she wanted. Hell, she didn't even want to be having this conversation in the first place. If it wasn't for her respect for the idea of a democratic vote between their old group, and the fact that she and Hope had the best camaraderie out of all of them, she wouldn't even be in this position as diplomatic negotiator. This breakfast meeting wouldn't have at all had the same undertones if Sazh or Snow were the ones who seemed the most likely to meet up with Hope the first day after he turned eighteen.
The compromise was that Hope should, indeed, have his childhood here, but the jig would be up after eighteen years. Then the cold hard shock of reality would be made apparent to him.
And just WHO was decided to be the herald of doom? HER. It was always Light. Even in this new world, it seems she can't escape the pressure of being the catalyst to bring change. That had been her old job description. She can't escape fate, even in another reincarnation.
They've made it out on the road.
"So, wanna listen to some music?" Hope suggests, and Light lifts her chin incrementally. She still can't look at him for some reason yet. Nor can she speak. She fears that if she does, something equally disturbing will blurt out as it did before.
Hope seems casual enough as he changes the dial on his dash to the local rock station. Commercial. He dims the audio out of reflex and the asinine jingles and incessant chatter recede slightly as they drive along.
Light shifts her gaze to Hope's steady fingertips as they hug the wheel, his effortless movements. He doesn't seem perturbed. This is good. There are a lot more important things that they need to be worried about. In fact, the only time Hope seemed to lose his cool so far this morning is when she brought up the thought of Bhunivelze still being around, or at least looking to come back into this world. Of course that would disturb anyone who remembered how things were back on Gran Pulse.
She shivers, unable to control the thought of doom.
"Oh, are you cold? You should have said so, I can change the heat..."
"No, I'm fine." Light's cold, clipped words come out as completely bitchy, and she winces inwardly to hear her own voice. Hope says nothing, and smartly decides to focus once more on the road, allowing the subject to die.
WHO is the one acting like a teenager? This is ridiculous. There were plenty of times her and Hope had been alone, adventured alone, back on their home planet. In fact, this reason was why she seemed the most likely candidate to drop the bomb on Hope's earth life out of all of them.
Of course, he was only fourteen in that time. Well, at first. Well, and then there was that time, when he was sleeping and I had first watch, that he confused me for his mom, Nora. That was awkward, too. But the kid had been sleeping. He hadn't known he had called out to her as "Mom," back then, and she never told him that he did that. He was young, and there was no time to discuss silly things like that. Besides, it was only once. He grew up emotionally on the road they traveled together.
Now he's grown up, literally. Argh, she'd already noticed that! Shaking her head angrily, she forces herself to snap out of her reverie and focus on the mission at hand. She had always been good at that.
"We're here. IHOP sounds good. I'm hungry." Hope is saying, and as Light snaps out of it, she realizes he's right. They're pulling into a parking space right directly in front of the dining room windows. Hope throws it in park and shuts of the engine, playfully tossing the keys and then snatching them out of the air as he pulls them out of the ignition.
"Wanna grab that bite?"
Still a kid at heart, though. Light smiles at Hope, then nods once. "Yeah, let's get some grub. I'm starving."