Assassin's Creed (c) Ubisoft

Concept (c) sannam

It was a battle of the wills, a three year old versus a thirty-something year old. Edward stared down at his naked son. He held a pair of training pull-ups that Haytham had refused to put on, while trying to ignore the brown stains on the wall behind him. The image was easier to forget than the smell. "C'mon Haytham, time to put your big boy pants on," Edward said, holding up the pull-ups.

"No!" Haytham shouted. It was his favorite word today. No meant everything from actual no to yes I love it! and everything in between. Edward sighed, glancing at his watch. At the rate things were going he'd be late for the job interview. He needed this second job.

"Haytham, Daddy isn't in the mood for your games, now c'mere and let's get your pants on," Edward growled and took a step towards his son.

"No!" the toddler shouted, before letting loose a giggling scream, bolting away from Edward. Edward swore and took off after Haytham. The boy didn't get far, before Edward managed to scoop him up after a few feet. "No! No! No! No! No!" Haytham screamed, kicking his little legs.

"Haytham… you're gonna," Edward growled, wrestling with his wriggling child, "get dressed, properly!"

"No!" Haytham screamed as Edward forced him into his training pants. Big fat tears rolled down Haytham's chubby cheeks. "No!" Haytham muttered, tugging at the trainers. Edward smacked his son's hand.

"You leave those on," Edward said, before glancing around until he found a tiny T-shirt. "Arms up, time for your shirt," he said. Haytham pouted but held his arms up and Edward pulled the shirt over the boy's head. "Where's Haytham? Where is he?" Edward asked, playfully before tugging the shirt down, revealing Haytham's head. "There he is! There's my precious little sea urchin!" Edward cheered, tickling his son beneath his chin. Haytham squirmed, giggling.

"C'mon, sit in Daddy's lap so we can get your pants on," Edward said. Haytham smiled before sitting in Edward's lap. His father grabbed a pair of shorts and wriggled them onto Haytham. "Now, if ya have to go potty come and get me or someone and what do you tell them?"

"Poddy!" Haytham shouted, twisting around to look at his father with a grin. "I haffa poddy!"

"Good boy!" Edward cheered, kissing his son's cheek. "You say that when you need to go. Now, Daddy has to clean the wall before Uncle Ben comes over."

"Why?" Haytham asked, as Edward set him on the floor. Edward frowned, unsure if Haytham meant why he had to clean or why Ben was coming over. "Why?" Haytham asked again.

"Because ya made a mess of the wall, sea urchin," Edward said, getting up to fetch a bucket of water, rag and soap.

"Why?" Haytham followed Edward, little hands clasped behind his back.

"Daddy has to go talk to Uncle Áddie," Edward said, kneeling before the offending brown smear with his bucket of soapy water. He was secretly glad Haytham was unsuccessful in using the rest of the walls as a canvas for his fecal art. Grumbling he began to clean.

He finished just as the doorbell rang. Haytham began to bark like a dog, giggling in between each woof. Edward dumped the brown water down the sink, washed his hands before heading to the door and opening it. "Ben!" Edward greeted cheerily. Ben Hornigold did not look very pleased to be at Edward's house.

"Edward." Ben forced a smile.

"Thanks for coming, I would've gotten—"

"It's fine," Ben said, patting on the shoulder as he entered the house. "I can watch him for a few hours."

"I really appreciate it, I'll pay ya."

"I want a steak next time I visit then," Ben said, staring at Edward. "You make a good steak."

"Deal. Anyway," Edward said, "Haytham!"

Haytham peeked around the corner, a plastic bucket on his head and a squirt gun in his hand. A devilish glint gleamed in his eyes as he grinned up at the two adults. "Pew! Pew!" he cried, shooting the squirt gun at Ben. Much to everyone's shock, the squirt gun had water in it. Ben frowned, glowering at Edward.

"Make it two steaks," he said, as Edward snickered.

"Alright," Edward agreed, before slipping into his room and changing into a clean polo shirt and slacks. Haytham peered up at him as Edward came out looking almost like a different person. "Haytham, c'mere and give Daddy a kiss," Edward said. Haytham grinned and bolted into Edward's arms. Edward hugged his son tightly, kissing his cheek. "Be good while Daddy is gone, okay? Mind Uncle Ben and tell him when you have to go potty."

"No," Haytham said, smiling. Ben arched a brow.

"His favorite word today is no. You'll have to use a bit of detective work with it to see what he means. He should tell you when he needs to use the bathroom, but if he doesn't ask him and keep asking him until he tells you," Edward said, letting Haytham go.

"Why didn't you get Thatch to watch him? The man's good with kids."

"Thatch is busy, now I really need to go," Edward said. "My number is on the fridge, if you need to get a hold of me, food is in the fridge and… yeah, think that's it," Edward said, kissing his son's cheek quickly. "Bye sea urchin, I whale always love you!"

"Bye-bye," Haytham chirped, waving as his father left. When the door closed, Haytham looked up at Ben with a grin, before firing his squirt gun into his babysitter's face.

Ben cut up the carrot sticks and dinosaur shaped chicken nuggets. He set them on a plate, which he placed on the table. "Alright Haytham, lunchtime," Ben called. There was no answer. "Haytham?" Ben called, trying to crush the panic that wanted to bubble up as he headed towards the living room. He felt relief wash over him when he saw the toddler standing there, blankly staring at the wall. "Haytham, what's the matter?"

Haytham looked up at Ben and smiled mischievously. "Tee-Tee!" he squealed, reaching for Ben's face with grabbing little fingers. The man placed his hands on the boy's small shoulders to prevent those grabbing little hands from reaching his face.

"Do you have to go potty?" Ben asked. Haytham stopped trying to grab Ben's facial hair. The little boy stared at his babysitter, eyes growing wide.

"No," he said, though it was hesitant.

"Haytham, do you have to go potty?" Ben asked again. Haytham looked away.

"No," he repeated. Ben pulled Haytham close and peeked down his pants. No poop or pee, so maybe Haytham didn't have to go. Ben frowned, not liking Haytham's attitude.

"C'mon, we're going to use the bathroom," Ben said, scooping up Haytham.

"No! No! No!" Haytham screamed, wriggling frantically in an attempt to get free. Ben held him firmly as he went into the bathroom. He lifted the lid to the toilet and yanked Haytham's pants down before sitting the boy on the toilet, gripping him beneath the arms. Haytham whimpered, but Ben was rewarded with a tinkling sound and then three small splashes. He peeked into the toilet, nodded upon seeing the waste.

"Good boy," he told Haytham, who looked at him as if Ben was the most wretched horrid creature known to man. Ben cleaned Haytham up before tugging the boy's pants back up to his waist. He flushed the toilet and Haytham squirmed free, making a break for the door. "Hey, wash your hands first!" Ben said, grabbing Haytham around his middle.

"No, no, no!" Haytham squealed in protest as Ben forced him to wash his hands. The little boy gave him another withering scowl, but it only made Ben smile.

"Now, let's eat."

Edward came home that evening, a brown paper bag in his hands. "About fucking time, Kenway!" Ben roared.

"Daddy!" Haytham squealed in delight, rushing towards Edward.

"Did something happen?" Edward asked, worriedly, as he maneuvered his way to the table and set the groceries down. He then bent and scooped up Haytham.

"That kid of yours is a terror," Ben said, jabbing his finger at Haytham. "I refuse to watch him until he can speak properly and wipe his own—"

"Fuck!" Haytham shouted, a big grin on his face. "Fuck, fuck, fuck!" he said in a singsong voice. Edward blinked, staring at his son, before scowling at Ben.

"Butt…" Ben finished lamely, looking away. "So… you off Friday?"

"In the evening yeah, but I work now from eight to three at the mechanic shop Áddie runs," Edward said.

"Was there any doubt Ádewalé wouldn't give you the job?" Ben asked. Edward shrugged.

"Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck," Haytham sang.

"Don't say that word," Edward said, bouncing the boy a little bit, "it's a daddy word." Haytham ignored him and continued to sing his song consisting entirely of the word fuck. Edward frowned. "Haytham Kenway!" Edward thundered, shocking his son out of his own little world. "Don't say that. It's a daddy word. Do you want a spanking?"

Haytham looked up at his father, then hung his head. "No," Haytham mumbled, resting his head against Edward's shoulder. He grabbed a fistful of Edward's shirt. Edward smiled, patting his son on the back.

"I need to go," Ben said, feeling awkward.

"Steaks go on the grill at four," Edward said.

"All right, I'll be there," Ben said, before leaving the house. Edward sighed, pulling out the mail from the bag of groceries. He sat down, settled Haytham in his lap and flipped through the mail. Bills mostly, which made Edward groan and rub his forehead.

"Dada?" Haytham asked. Edward glanced at his son, and smiled.

"Hey, sea urchin," Edward whispered, ruffling his son's dark hair. "You were good for Uncle Ben?"

"Yeah."

"Good." Edward looked at the bills in his hand. "Don't worry sea urchin, we'll pull through. Daddy always pulls through," Edward sighed, "somehow."

Haytham looked up at Edward, an innocent look in his eyes. Edward chuckled and gave his boy a one armed hugged, resting his cheek on Haytham's little head. "I love ya, Haytham, love ya so much. We'll be alright, I promise. Daddy won't let anything bad happen to ya." Edward whispered before pressing a kiss against Haytham's temple. "I promise."

The boy giggled and looked up at Edward. "Wuv you Dada," Haytham said. Edward smiled and held his son tightly.

"You were good for Uncle Ben?"

"Yeah."

This is part is where I hear Ben going "Lies, Edward! All lies!" Hahaha. So, this chapter is a tad bit sad at the end. Edward is a single parent working two jobs with a small child to take care of. It's tough and stressful, but this story is ultimately happy, so while there are some sad moments, I always aim for a happy-ish ending for each chapter.

Tomorrow Haytham begins kindergarten! Yay! And yes, Edward works as a mechanic for Ádewalé.

I'm glad you people are enjoying this.

Tee-tee is what my nephew calls cats. My cat is named "TC" so, last year when my sister and her family was living with us, he kept hearing "TC" for all the cats, so now he calls cats "Tee-tee". Ben being mistaken for a cat by Haytham comes from another comic from DA, where Edward gets drunk and mistake Ben for a cat (it's the mutton chops, they look like cat whiskers. Haha!)
My nephew always does the pew-pew thing. It's really cute because he cups his fist with one hand points both index fingers at you and goes "pew-pew" with this infectious little grin on his face. The bucket on Haytham heads in an idea MohawkWoman tossed to me last night. See! I was able to work the bucket in!

A "daddy word" is what we called swear words when I was a kid, since my dad was only ever allowed to say them. This they became "daddy words". I remember getting upset with my sister when she said those words when we got older and scold her for saying a daddy word.

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-Nemo

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