Nathan looked down at the CD, just staring at it. He had this sudden gust of wind go through his body, he shivered. This was giving him the goosebumps. The thought of every answer that he wanted from Brooke was in the video. This video that was on the dining room table. Haley watched Nathan look at the CD for a while now, she wondered when he'll move or say something. She wanted him to watch the damn video so that they could move on. Just watch the video. She kept repeating her mind.
"I can't do it." Nathan finally looked away from the CD, he took a step back.
"No," Haley walked fully into the dining room. Haley thought that he was trying him best and that he would finally watch the video and get the closure that he needs. "You were doing so good." Haley picked up the CD, seeing Brookes handwriting.
"I know, I know but I just can't." Nathan didn't know how to explain it. There was something that was stopping him from watching the tape. He didn't even want to look at it.
"Nathan, Brooke made you a CD." Haley placed the CD back on the table. She thought this was amazing, Brooke did love nathan. She made a CD just got him, so that he could move on. "If you don't, then your going to be stuck where you are now."
"I'll be fine with that, hales." Nathan said to her.
"Well I'm not. Your going to watch this Danny video." Haley raised her voice, having enough. She was going to get him to watch this video.
"I can't." Nathan explained.
"Why?" Haley asked him.
"Because it will mean that she really gone." Nathan said to her. Haley rubbed her forehead, she knew that there was something more to why Nathan didn't want to watch the video.
"We all have to move on sooner or later." Haley lowered he voice, almost to whisper.
"I've heard that a million times. I tell myself to move on but then..." Nathan rubbed his face in frustration. He was do tired that he felt like he was never getting any sleep.
"Nathan," Haley placed her palm on his chest. She didn't want him to think that he was alone. "You are not alone in this. I'm here for you. We can get through this together." Haley started to say. "Brooke wouldn't want you to be like this. And Jamie wants his father back." Haley told him. Nathan couldn't argue with that, he did really want to know what was the video. "Go see what Brooke wanted to tell you." Haley kissed Nathan on the cheek. Nathan grabbed the video and walked into the guest room. In order for Nathan to keep going and putting the CD in the video player was for him to not think about anything. He sat down in a chair and pressed play without giving it a second thought. There was a pause, a long silence. Then he heard movement, the camera turned over and had a close up of Brookes face. She was trying to see if it was playing, she had this confused and desperate look on her face.
"Nathan!" Brooke called out, slapping the camera. She was beginning to get frustrated. Brooke heard nothing but silence. "Nathan!" Brooke lifted the camera up, studying it.
"What?!" Nathan yelled back from the kitchen. Nathan waited, trying to see if Brooke would answer back but there was nothing. "What?!" Nathan yelled, trying to get her attention. He groaned in annoyance. He walked out of the kitchen and into the long hallway. He saw Brooke at the end of the hallway, looking down at the camera.
"Never mind," Brooke saw the flashing red light on the camera that told that she was tapping. "I got it to work, thank you." Brooke said, focusing on the camera. Nathan turned around and walked back to the kitchen. Brooke placed a bright smile on her face, facing the camera towards her. "Alright, Nathan Scott. Welcome." Brooke raised her eyebrow. "I never thought that this will be the last time that we will reallly...kind of talk." Brooke shrugged her shoulders. In that moment, she wishes that nothing will happen and she will surivive this. "If your watching this, which I hope you don't. It means that I'm dead from giving birth to my boy..." Brooke had a smile on her face when she talked Bout her son. "And I'm okay with that. I'm okay with dying for the person I love." Brooke said honestly. "I want you to know that, I'm okay. I know we haven't talked much, especially about my cancer but I thought I would make you this tape. Because out of everyone, I know your going to be the strongest. I need you to be there for everyone while they morn. Especially Haley, Lucas, Jamie and my son. They need you. I need you. I know this is hard, and that this is a lot of your plate but I know your the person to do it." Brooke placed a fake smIle on her face, she didn't want to show how in pain she was. "Lets go see what your doing." Brooke quickly changed the subject. Brooke turned the camera around, facing what was in front of her. She walked into the kitchen and starts to film Nathan. "Nathan say hello to my camera." Brooke asked him, standing beside him. Nathan laughed, still cooking the stake in the stove.
"Why do you have a camera?" Nathan asked her.
"Just to film me before I have the baby." Brooke shrugged her shoulders casually.
"Brooke your nine months pregnant, you could have this baby any second.". Nathan turned over, giving Brooke his full attention. "Go sit down." Nathan pointed to the bar chairs next to the island in their kitchd.
"Okay, boss man. We're you like this when Haley was pregnant?" Brooke kinked her eyebrow.
"Pretty much. I'm just trying to keep you from having baby all over my kitchen floor."
"Oh, I'm glad that your worried about your floor." Brooke said sarcastic. Nathan laughed. "The baby is on the way, ready to be a godparent?" Brooke asked. Nathan stopped what he was doing and turned around. Brooke had just said something that Nathan had been waiting for but he was surprised by it.
"Your choosing me to be the godparent?" Nathan asked her, making sure that she was thinking clearly.
"You and Haley," Brooke corrected herself. Nathan nodded, feeling a little bit better.
"Really?" Nathan asked her, drying his hands with a papertowel.
"Yea," Brooke chuckled a little, seeing the excited look on his face. Nathan walked over to her and wrapped his arms around her. He squeezed tightly, he was never so proud and excited for something in his life. He was happy that he had friends like them. "I love you, Nathan Scott."
"I love you too." Nathan held her tightly. Brooke laughed, knowing that Nathan wasn't going to let go. "We've been through a lot me and you."
"We've changed a lot too." Brooke informed him. Nathan could agree with that, he took a step back and looked down at his friend. Brooke was proud of the both them, seeing how they have changed for the better. "Haley changed you and Lucas changed me." Brooke smiled.
"Does Haley know?" Nathan asked her, walking back into the kitchen. Brooke shook her head.
"I think Lucas is going to tell her." Brooke answered him. Nathan nodded, understanding why Lucas would want to tell Haley.
"I'm happy that you told me Brooke." Nathan said to her, turning around. Brooke put the camera down, taking in this moment because she had this thought that she will never see Nathan again.
"I'm glad that you are here to hear it." Brooke raised her shoulders. Nathan was filled with excited, he couldn't sit down. "And I just want to know, that if something were to ever happen to me-"
"Brooke," Nathan said, starting to feel uncomfortable.
"I want you to know," Brooke started again. "I'm okay." Brooke said to him. Nathan narrowed his eyebrows.
"How will you know if your going to be okay?" Nathan asked her.
"Because I know that Lucas and my child are going to be safe with you and Hales...I'm going...I am...okay." Brooke said to him, Nathan rolled his eyes slightly. He turned over and wanted the conversation was getting a little weird.
"Alright, Brooke. I'm sure I'll be fine." Nathan shrugged his shoulders, thinking nothing of words that Brooke said to him. Brooke smirked, watching Nathan finish cooking.
"I love you, Nathan." Brooke assured him.
"I love you too, Brooke." Nathan said without looking back. Brooke slowly walked back into the hallway, trying to sneak off without Nathan noticing. She turned the camera towards her, she brushed her hair away from her face and stared into the camera.
"I'm okay, Nathan." She said again into the camera, knowing that he's watching this later on. "And If I'm okay, there should be no reason why you shouldn't either. I'm gone, that's it. I'm gone and theres nothing that you can do that can bring me back. You could cry, scream, be angry, pray but I'm still going to be gone. I'm telling you this because I know that you can take it because you are strong Nathan Scott. Strongest person I know- right next to Lucas of course." Brooke corrected herself, she laughed a little. Her smile quickly faded and she was serious. "I want you to take care of Lucas for me and Davis...and Hales and Jamie. Make sure to tell them that I love them everday, because I do. I love you...see you soon." Brooke quickly turned the camera around and shut it off.
Nathan had no words coming out, he was so shocked and amazed the video that he just saw. He had so much emotion building up, he felt like he was going to break. The emotion that he felt the most, was anger. Anger because Brooke didn't tell him that she was dying, that he couldn't read between the lines. That he wasn't there for her like he should have been. Nathan was so furious with himself, that he didn't hear Haley walk into the room. She stood beside the door, seeing Nathan look at the blank television.
"Nathan?" Haley called to him. Nathan sniffed, tears falling from his eyes. He picked up the remote, rewinded the tape and played it from the beginning. Haley watched as he did, wondering what he was doing.
"She was right there," Nathan mumbled under his breath with anger, but Haley could hear him. She took a step forward, wanting to shelter her husband.
"Nathan-" Haley shook her head, she didn't want him to blame herself. If there was someone to blame, it would be Peyton.
"She was right there!" Nathan slammed the remote against the floor, it shattered into pieces. He quickly stood up and turned around towards Haley. Haley could see the hurt in his eyes and the anger in his tears. "She was right there," Nathan calmed down, pointing to the television behind him. Haley looked over at the T.V, she saw Brooke talking to Nathan. She seemed so happy and calm. "I mean, why wouldn't she tell me...why wouldn't she tell me that she was sick." Nathan asked Haley.
"Because she knew that you wouldn't be able to take it. She already had Lucas stressing her about cancer, she didn't want someone else." Haley answered him quickly.
"Wait, did you know about this?" Nathan asked her. Haley paused, she swallowed her fear and answered him.
"Yes." Haley said to him.
"Wh-What?! You knew about Brooke dying and you didn't want to tell me?!" Nathan yelled.
"Brooke didn't want me to tell you. She thought it would be better if you didn't know." Haley tried to explain that he wasn't her dicussion. It wasn't her choice. Brooke was in charge of everything that happened in her life.
"No! I'm her friend! I should have known! I could have been there...I could have done something!" Nathan tried to tell her, he didn't know what he would do but it was better than nothing.
"It was Cancer! Nathan! There was nothing that we could do!" Haley yelled back. "She was dying." Haley cleared her throat, trying to calm herself down.
"And Peyton killing her was just the icing on the cake." Nathan said sarcasticlly. Haley rolled her eyes, she hated arguing with him.
"It was the cancer that killed her Nathan, the doctors couldn't save her." Haley said to him.
"Is Brooke dead or alive? Haley, pick one. Because I pick dead. You had no right, you had no right for not telling me." Nathan shook his head.
"That's what Brooke wanted. She wanted someone that wouldn't look at her differently, that wouldn't look at her like she was sick. You treated her like Brooke...and that's what she really needed." Haley tried to explain to him. Nathan started to listen to his wife. "In Brooke's last moments, she wanted you there to treat her like a person because she knew that you would. You made it bareable for her." Haley told him. Nathan calmed him down. Haley walked over to him, grabbing his face, forcing him to look into her eyes. "Brooke...Brooke is dead." Haley forced the words from her mouth.
"Haley, please," Nathan shook his head, sobbing.
"She's dead and she's never coming back." Haley told him. Nathan cleared his throat, looking to Haley's eyes. He could tell that she didn't believe that. Nathan leaned in and whispered in her ear. Haley listened closely, she pulled away. "Are you sure?" Haley asked him. Nathan nodded. Haley didn't wait a second longer, she grabbed her phone and dialed the first number on her list.