These characters are under copyright by Atsushi Ōkubo, Squar Enix, Yen Press, Shōnen,
Akatsuki Yamatoya. Madman Entertainment, Manga Entertainment, Funimation, and/or others. This is a work of fanfiction, for no monetary gain.

Chapter 11 – Secrets and Lies: What Are You Hiding, Spirit?

Maka frowned as her father entered the Infirmary again, this time with Soul in tow. She was about to tell her father to leave her alone, when he headed for her bed, until she saw the grave looks on both his and Soul's faces.

"Oh Lord Death. Has something happened to Kid?" she demanded anxiously.

"No, sweetie, nothing like that. Kid is fine, and no, there hasn't been any word about Justin. But I need to talk to you about something. I'd like to come home with you and Soul," her father said.

She crossed her arms and glared at him. "I'm not going anywhere with you. You've seen I'm alive. You can go back to ignoring me now. I'm sure there are a couple of dozen other 'young ladies' that are eager for your attention," she snapped acidly.

To her surprise, Soul frowned at her. "Maka, you need to let him come home with us. This is something important."

Why isn't Soul on my side? She looked around for an alternate ally. "Dr. Stein? I shouldn't leave the Infirmary tonight, right?" she asked, as he reentered the room.

He frowned. "No, you need to rest here for at least a day and preferably three."

"Told you," Maka said smugly, wincing at how childish she sounded, and at the ridiculous urge to stick her tongue out at her father.

"Stein, Lord Death has authorized Maka and Soul to rest in their own home, unless there's a medical reason they can't. Maka and I need to talk about a serious matter, one that's long overdue. It's past time she learns the truth," her father stated cryptically.

Maka swallowed at the way Dr. Stein went still, the shadowed look that flitted through his eyes. There was fury there, chilling hatred, and then it was gone, as if it had never been. "The whole truth, or the version Lord Death believes?" he challenged.

Her father turned a pleading look on Stein, sharing some kind of secret message.

"So you finally agree she's ready? Good. Maka, Soul, you're both released. You're to go home with Spirit as your guardian, to ensure you reach there safely, and to protect you as long as he feels it is necessary. Good luck, Spirit," Stein said emotionlessly.

"I thought you don't believe in luck," her father said sardonically, with a weak smile, the kind he always made when he was desperately trying to get her to believe his latest lie, about how much he loved her and her mother.

"I don't, but you do. And after all these years, I think you're entitled to some good luck, for a change. The world is all about balance and imbalance. It's past time the balance in your life is restored. We weren't all born to be askew," Stein claimed.

"How about you follow your own advice and buy Marie a drink, once you finish up here. I'll see you in the morning, Meister o' mine," Spirit said, and then he winced, as if in physical pain, as he looked at Stein.

Maka turned, but she couldn't see anything different about him.

"Sorry. I didn't mean to say that," her father said, his voice strangely gravelly.

"Of course you didn't. It's fine," Stein said, in an impassive voice, as he turned away.

Maka had the distinct feeling it was anything but fine. What in the world is going on?

0 0 0

It was ridiculous how, after all these years, just a few words from Spirit could still turn his neatly stitched world back into shards of broken glass so easily. When will I ever learn?

So tonight, Spirit's going to tell Maka part of the truth, the half truth Lord Death believes. The only ones who know the full truth are me, Spirit, though he never believed it, and that bitch Julia. I think it's long past time I narrow the field down to just one. How convenient that she's back in Death City, though I doubt she bothered to let either Spirit or Maka know. But none of that will matter, after tonight.

"Nygus, you can take it from here. Yesterday and today were both supposed to be my days off. I have plans," Stein said, heading for the door, his madness howling to be released. It was time to give it what it wanted, what it always wanted: blood and death. But before he visited Julia, he needed to pick up a certain little present the Witch Medusa had so graciously provided.

0 0 0

Soul couldn't help but notice Spirit was walking slower and slower, as he approached their house, and it wasn't for Maka's sake. She was plunging on ahead, obviously anxious to get this over with.

"What's wrong? Second thoughts?" Soul prodded.

Spirit turned and looked at him guiltily. "Yeah. But not the kind you're thinking. I told myself I was going to tell Maka the truth, but I'd still be lying to her, the way I've been lying to Lord Death all these years."

Soul's eyes widened in surprise. "Why would you lie to Lord Death? You're his Death Scythe."

Spirit closed his eyes, then opened them again, and Soul wondered what he hadn't wanted him to see in them.

"Yes. Yes, I am. But I was Stein's Weapon first." Spirit turned back to face Maka. "Maka, honey, I know you won't understand, and I know it's just going to make you hate me more, but I can't speak to you yet. I need to tell Lord Death something first."

Maka spun around, a look of fury on her face, but before she could say anything, Spirit continued. "He's been… unpredictable… lately, and I'm afraid I might upset him with this. If… if I don't come back, I want you to know I've always loved you, and I never once betrayed your mother. I betrayed you. It was for the best of reasons, the best of intentions, but the road to Lord Death is paved with good intentions."

Maka was staring at him, eyes wide in confusion, and then narrowed in anger and hurt. "Wait. What are you talking about? What do you mean you didn't betray her, you betrayed me? What do you mean, not come back? Are you running away again? For good this time? Well fine! Go! I don't need you anyway! You never loved me! You don't know how to love!"

Spirit wordlessly turned to go and Soul stared. Something in Spirit's eyes had shattered, and twin tears were streaking down his face. "No, Maka. The problem is I do," Spirit whispered. He looked up into Soul's eyes. "Don't ever hurt Kid, Soul." Then he ran, heading towards Death Mansion.

"Don't you run away from me! You coward! You womanizing bastard! You're a pathetic excuse for a father!" Maka screamed after him, furious, but Soul could tell she was fighting not to cry herself.

"Maka, stop it! He's hurting enough without you screaming at him," Soul scolded, thinking about everything he'd seen and heard. Spirit had said Lord Death was unpredictable, but it went far beyond that. Lord Death had been acting completely unstable; he'd lost control. He'd already tried to kill Spirit once, and when he'd come to rescue Kid, he'd looked even more terrifying, like he was about to kill everyone he saw, until Kid calmed him down. Which meant the reason Spirit might not come back… "Shit! We have to stop him. That idiot is going to get himself killed!"

"What? What are you talking about?" Maka demanded. "If anyone's going to kill him, it's going to be me!" she snapped, but with a flicker of worry in her eyes.

"You were still unconscious when Lord Death came to rescue Kid. He was like in the Death Room, only worse. If Kid hadn't calmed him down, Lord Death could have killed all of us. He was acting like the Kishin," Soul explained.

He saw the anger change to skepticism and then shock. "Wait. Are you trying to tell me that whatever my father plans to tell Lord Death could…? But he's Lord Death's Death Scythe! He'd never hurt my… He was choking him," she whispered. "And when he stopped, and my father stepped between him and us, and told us to go, I thought he was just being melodramatic, trying to look heroic, but… You mean we were really in danger? From Lord Death?"

Soul knew Maka idolized Lord Death, but he hadn't realized she'd actually discounted what she'd seen, that she hadn't believed her own eyes. "Yeah. Come on. We have to keep him from getting… Damn it. We'll never catch up. Neither of us can run right now." Then his eyes lit with inspiration, and he took out Nygus's mirror and Patty's eyeliner pencil, which he'd found lying in the street after the battle, and wrote on the mirror with it, 42-42-564 and recited the familiar chant. "42-42-564, whenever you want to knock on Death's door."

"Yes? Oh! Soul. I think this might be for you, Kid," Lord Death said, a smile in his voice.

Perfect. He'd planned to ask for Kid, to speak to both of them together.

"Soul?" Kid asked.

"Kid, listen. We're on our way, but we can't make it to you in time. Spirit is on his way to see your father. You can't let him talk to him. It would be really dangerous," Soul swore.

Kid frowned. "Spirit plans to hurt my father?" he asked in disbelief.

"No. Just the opposite. Spirit's planning to tell your father something that is going to upset him a lot. You have to keep them apart until Maka and I can talk to him. Convince your father to go to the Death Room until… No. To go somewhere without a mirror, because if he's watching, and hears… Please, Kid. Just trust me," Soul urged.

Kid's puzzled frown turned to a look of pure faith. "With my life," he swore, echoing what he'd said earlier.

Soul exhaled in relief. "Thanks."

"Father, you heard. You need to leave," Kid said firmly.

"Very well. But I expect you to tell me what all this is about, Son," Lord Death said.

"I will, Father. Whatever I can, as soon as I learn it. I promise," Kid swore.

"We're on our way. Thanks, Kid. Thank you, Lord Death," Soul said sincerely. He smudged the numbers on the mirror with his finger, breaking the connection. "Come on, Maka. We need to find out what this is about."

0 0 0

"I'm sorry, Spirit. My father is no longer here," Kid told his father's Death Scythe, greeting him at the front door when he rang the bell.

"Oh. Where is he?" Spirit asked, looking like a man who'd been given a moment's reprieve from the headsman's ax, while he sharpened his blade.

"I'm afraid I can't tell you that. And don't bother to try calling him. He promised me not to answer, until I talked to him first," Kid replied, folding his arms, over his chest, the effect spoiled by the cast, though at least he was properly dressed now, in a short sleeved white dress shirt, the left arm of which had barely fit over the cast, and a pair of black dress slacks, and polished boots. His eyes fell to the ward, and his unease at his appearance vanished.

Spirit frowned. "Why would…? Soul. He called Lord Death, didn't he?" he exclaimed, with sudden insight.

"Yes. What's going on, Spirit? Why is Soul afraid to let you speak to my father? He said it was to protect you, not my father. What have you done? Are you going to confess some kind of crime or betrayal?" Kid pressed. He hadn't promised Soul not to find out what was going on before he got there with Maka.

From the look of pain in Spirit's eyes, Kid could tell he'd guessed correctly.

"What did you do, Spirit?"

Spirit exhaled heavily and looked Kid in the eye. "I betrayed the people I love most. That's all I can tell you. I need to talk to your father, Kid. I don't know how he'll feel, after I do. I don't know if he'll hate me, if he'll understand, if he'll forgive me for lying to him all these years, but I need to tell him the truth. To tell them. Everyone who's involved. I know I probably won't be your father's Death Scythe anymore, but I don't care. He can't have a Weapon he can't trust. I never should have been his Weapon in the first place."

Kid knew Spirit was one of the youngest Weapons ever to achieve his status as Lord Death's Death Scythe, but at the moment, he looked old, worn and weary, like every bad thing that had ever happened in his life had come crashing down onto him in an instant.

"Please, Kid. I need to talk to him, alone, now," Spirit urged.

"I promised my father I'd tell him what this was about as soon as I learned, but I can see I won't learn anything. I told Soul I trusted him, but I didn't promise him I'd keep you away from Father, and I trust you too, Spirit. Come with me. Father's in my bathroom, where there aren't any mirrors. You can talk there, you can use my room. I'll make sure Soul and Kid don't disturb you."

Spirit sagged in relief. "Thank you, Kid. And promise me something, OK? If this doesn't go well, don't blame your father for what happens. But most importantly, don't let this get between you and Soul, alright? The last thing I want to do is mess things up for someone else, when I'm trying to fix them."

Kid looked him in the eye and said with quiet conviction, "My father would never hurt you, Spirit. But I promise. I won't let anyone or anything come between me and Soul."

"Good. You're a lot smarter than I ever was, Kid. You're going to make a great Lord Death someday, but hopefully many, many years from now."

Kid led Spirit up the elevator, and then down the hall to his room. He knocked on the closed door. "Father, it's me. There's been a change in plans. I've brought Spirit to talk to you."

The door opened. "I see. Come in, Spirit. Thank you, Son. I'll speak to you later."

"Alright Father. Please, no matter what he tells you, remember I love you and I'm here for you. And whether she realizes it or not, Maka loves her father, and he's a good man, a good Weapon. I can see it's taking him a lot of courage to speak with you like this. Hear him out and don't do anything rash. Like you've always told me, there's more than one answer to every problem, and sometimes when bad things happen, it's for good reasons, it's necessary in some way," Kid said, reluctant to leave the two of them alone, in spite of what he'd told Spirit.

"Thank you, Kid. I'll see you later, once Spirit and I talk."

"I'll be resting in the guest room I was using before," Kid replied. Then he closed the door, leaving Reaper and Death Scythe alone together, hoping he wasn't making a grave mistake.

0 0 0

"You have something to tell me, Spirit?" Lord Death asked softly.

"I do. But first, I have a request. Can you take your mask off for me? Please? I need to see your face," Spirit asked hopefully.

"Why?" Lord Death asked curiously.

"Because it might be the last chance I have to look at you," Spirit replied honestly.

"Why?" Lord Death prodded, his voice more cautious than curious now.

"Because I've been lying to you for years, because I was afraid of hurting you, but I can't keep lying to you, and I'm not sure you'll ever want to see me again, once I tell you the truth," Spirit told him.

Without another word, Death removed his mask. It had been so long since Spirit had seen Death's face, years, but it hadn't changed at all. Spirit drank in every feature, from his black and white hair to his blood red eyes, to every nuance of his face. He looked like Kid might, in his prime, if he were wearing red contact lenses. No, the lines of Kid's face were softer, the striking bone structure less pronounced on Kid. Kid was handsome, but Death was breathtaking.

"Does it look right? I haven't made this face for you in years," Death asked, almost shyly.

Spirit's breath caught. He'd never asked in so many words, but Death had told him more than once that not only his soul but his body was linked to Death City. In a sense, he was Death City.

"So, is this what you used to look like, before you made Death City? Or just something you created? Because Kid looks a lot like you," Spirit asked.

"Of course he does! He's a handsome fellow, after all, a chip off the old block!" Death replied goofily, flexing the muscles on the arms that suddenly appeared at his side.

"Death, I'm serious," Spirit scolded, both hurt and annoyed by Death's childish display.

Death immediately stopped hamming. "I'm sorry, Spirit. But acting that way is part of what keeps the Madness Wavelength at bay, and as you've seen, it hasn't been easy for me to control it these past couple of days. In answer to your question, I used to look like this, hundreds of years ago, when I was first formed from my father. Kid looks a little different, because he was formed from only a fragment of my soul, not my entire soul, the way I was formed."

"So when you told me, years ago, that it would be odd to have a physical relationship with me, because you couldn't always be who I expected or needed you to be, that was what you meant?" Spirit asked.

Death looked surprised. "Of course. I thought you understood that…" He frowned and then a look of compassion and understanding flashed across his perfect face. "Is that what this is about? The feelings you have for me?"

Spirit nodded. "But not only for you. It's about Stein. And Julia."

"You love us, but not each in the same way," Death said knowingly, without hesitation.

"I love all of you. But exactly in the same way," Spirit corrected.

"But you've only had a physical relationship with your wife. Of the three of us, I mean. Because there are those other women. I never understood that, Spirit, how someone like you, who loves so deeply, could hurt someone he loved," Death scolded.

It was an old argument, one that had never been resolved, because it was steeped in fallacies and lies.

"Stein and I partnered our first day at the Academy. While all the other Meisters and Weapons were zeroing in on who they thought looked the strongest, or the coolest, he and I both slipped into the shadows of the tower and watched the rest of them interact. We didn't even notice each other, at first, we were both so quiet." Spirit paused, remembering how awkward he'd felt, how out of place. He'd been ready to run, to just give up. There was no way he'd ever be as cool as any of the kids he saw.

"That's when you first caught my eye. You were so beautiful, and so oblivious to your own beauty. I remember thinking, 'His hair is the color of my eyes.' I know, that was vain of me, but I've always been vain. Unlike you." Death admitted.

Spirit started in surprise, drawn back from the images of the past in his head to the present. "Really? You never told me that. About my hair and your eyes, I mean. I've always known you were vain," he said with a teasing smile.

He heard a gasp and then an exhalation like a sigh. "You're still beautiful. You just made me breathe again, for a moment. I'd forgotten what that felt like, to have lungs that aren't made of stone."

Spirit shook his head at his folly. "I've been so stupid, all these years. You're so human, I forget you're a God. Although that's the problem, you are so human. I know you can be hurt, emotionally I mean, and you're one of the last people I ever wanted to hurt." He sighed heavily. "But I've always excelled at hurting the people I love most, the ones I most want to protect."

"Maka," Death said knowingly.

"Stein, you, Maka. Take your pick," Spirit said sadly.

"Not Julia?" Death asked in surprise.

"Not in the same way, no," Stein replied.

"I'm not certain what you're saying, Spirit," Death said, sounding confused and a little frustrated.

"Do you remember when you taught me and Stein resonance? How you taught us?" Spirit asked.

"Of course. You were the only two students in the class who couldn't seem to get it right, which made no sense, since of all of them, the two of you were the most perfectly in synch, the most perfectly matched Weapon and Meister I'd ever seen. So I resonated with you, so you could feel what it was meant to feel like, firsthand," Death replied.

"That's right. You resonated with us both. The three of us were joined as one in that moment. It was like nothing I'd ever felt before. I'd always felt awkward and out of place, but you were a God, you were perfect, and Stein, he was just amazing, and with the two of you, it was like I was someone special too. I'd never felt so accepted, felt such belonging, such… love. That was the moment. The moment I fell in love with you both," Spirit admitted bravely.

"I know. I felt it," Death said, his voice uncharacteristically tender.

"How did you feel it? Did you feel my love for you, or did you love us, too?" Spirit asked, looking into Death's crimson eyes, voicing the question he'd never before dared to ask, because the answer would have hurt too much, regardless of what it was.

"I love all my Weapons and Meisters, all my students equally," Death replied.

Spirit dropped his gaze, his head falling forward until his chin rested against his breastbone. He'd thought he was ready to hear the truth, but he sadly realized that wasn't the truth he'd been expecting to hear.

He was shocked to feel a finger under his chin, smooth and warm, human feeling and gloveless, lifting his head with both strength and gentleness. "I wasn't finished, Spirit. I love all my Weapons and Meisters, all my students equally, all except for you and Stein. I love the two of you in a different way."

Spirit felt his heart race.

But then Death lowered his hand. "Stein was the strongest Meister I'd even seen and you were the strongest Weapon. But then Julia revealed Stein betrayed you, and Stein fled, and while I was too stunned to act, Julia stepped in and won your heart. And before I knew it, you were married, and she was pregnant with Maka. She could no longer wield you in battle, but together you both realized your full potential. She forged you into a perfect Death Scythe for me. She got to have you, but I was the one who got to hold you."

Spirit winced at the distorted, echoed memory of the marriage vows he'd taken. "She never forgave you for that. Or me. Julia was always so jealous, even at the start. She and Spirit used to glare at one another, they fought like cats and dogs whenever they saw one another. Back then, she was only a good friend. I was shocked when she told me what Stein had been doing to me, that she discovered he'd been drugging me and experimenting on me. I wouldn't have believed it, if I hadn't woken up in his lab, tied to the bench, with her unstrapping me.

"She was so brave, rescuing me like that. So many people were afraid of Stein. I never really understood why. He was always so good to me, so kind. It was the Madness, of course, though I didn't realize it at the time. It wasn't his fault. That's why I was able to forgive him, to work with him again, when he returned, after my divorce. That and what he did to himself, to try and fix himself. All those horrible scars. And he installed that freakish screw. He told me it was because he had a screw loose, and it gave him a way to tighten it again. And you forgave him too."

"I never forgave him, not for hurting you, or hurting himself. But I learned to bury my feelings, so the two of you could work together, so you could salvage what you could of your relationship. You were both so miserable apart," Death said, sounding lost and frustrated.

Spirit's eyes widened. "You let him come back for me?"

"Of course. I told you, I love you, Spirit. I couldn't bear to see you hurt. I only wish Stein loved you as much as you loved him," Death said sadly.

Spirit jumped, jarred out of the poignant moment by frantic pounding on the bedroom door, which was flung open before he could reach it.

"Marie!" Spirit cried, in shock and concern. She was panting and gasping, like she'd run halfway across the City, Kid at her heels, looking even worse. Spirit's eyes flew immediately to Death, and to his relief saw he was fully cloaked again, his face masked and hidden. Spirit looked back at Marie. He hadn't seen her look this frantic since the worst days of the Kishin War, when Stein was…

"What's happened to Stein? Is he…?" Spirit asked, leaving the sentence hanging. Is he mad? Injured? Not dead. He can't be.

"Gone. He's gone. I wasn't supposed to go to his lab today, but I know he doesn't eat when I'm not there to remind him and… He left a note. He's going to…to kill…" Her hand shook as she held out a piece of paper to Lord Death.

He took it as Spirit's eyes widened in disbelief as he guessed what it said. "To kill himself? Oh Lord Death," Spirit swore, his heart pounding.

"He's gone to kill your ex-wife first. And then he's going to… She's here, in Death City. We have to get to her, immediately. We have to stop him, save him," Death demanded.

The tone of his voice would have jarred Spirit out of his shock, even if the hand grabbing his arm and yanking him towards the wall hadn't. In the next moment, they were stepping through the ornately framed full length mirror in Kid's bedroom.