Memories

Grieving

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Logan closed his eyes as he heard Alex and Steve talking quietly, explaining exactly what had happened. Admitting there had been secrets and mistakes on both sides –admitting that they were responsible for the devastation across the country. And then quietly explaining what had happened –how the Avengers had been too quick to judge and the X-Men too secretive. About how it had led to pain and suffering and ultimately the death of an innocent child –a child whose mother had the power to change things. And because she was a mother first and a hero second –because to her, her child meant more to her than life itself –she changed, allowing a darker, more primal part to take control. Blood had been spilt, but it had only been a mother trying to protect her child. Protecting her from those that should have protected her. The only difference between Dragon and a normal, human mother who happened to carry a gun or Taser was that Dragon had the potential to do a lot more damage –a lot more than she actually did. That somehow, a rational part of Dragon's mind limited the destruction caused and allowed her to go to her death, knowing it would be the only way to stop the terror. Then Storm stepped forward.

"I've known Dragon for years –since we first found her chained and caged, forced to eat her own flesh to survive. She could barely stand and yet the first thing she did on her release was try and walk away from us –to protect us. That instinct served her well for many years. And then when she had children –one of whom is my goddaughter- that instinct was focussed and strengthened. She would be prepared to do anything to protect them. I myself admit that when I saw an innocent girl lying dead in her mother's arms, all I wanted to do was kill the one responsible. And yet what Dragon did was more than that. She did not deal death, as I would have, but gave life. That is what must be remembered of her. All she did, she did to save a life. A child's life. And maybe that pushed her too far. Maybe we pushed her too far. But she wanted to save an innocent life."

Storm closed her eyes and a single tear slide over her cheek.

"She came so far, and could have gone further. But she chose to die as a human rather than live as a god. We can do no less."

She stepped back and Logan looked away, knowing she had lost almost as much as him. Her stance –protecting Tora, defending the X-Men; had caused her marriage to fall apart. And Logan finally walked forward, feeling numb.

"I want to ask that my family is left alone. We're going through a…hard time… It's…not the best way… My family needs time to try and heal and we want to –need to be left alone."

He turned and walked away, ignoring the voices, ignoring the whispers. Wolverine and Dragon were married… Wolverine was the one who killed Dragon… His daughter was killed… He looks terrible… How can he live with himself…?

Logan ignored them, because he had to go.

Phoenix whistled.

"It was terrible what happened to him."

Curt sat curled up in the small storage room in the sub-level. He wasn't crying. He wasn't. But then, Maman also wasn't dead. And the last thing he'd said hadn't been "I hate you!" Because if it had, why was Curt still here? He had hurt Maman. He'd seen it in the way her shoulders had slumped as she walked away. Had he broken her? Had he been partly responsible for her death?

His head darted upwards as he heard the crash as someone walked into something.

"Who's there!?"

"Just me."

The woman stepped forward into the light; her long, riotously curly black hair framing dark grey eyes. The eyes that scanned his face and then glanced away.

"You look like her."

Curt shrugged.

"Evie looks more like Maman. I think it hurts Dad a bit every time he sees her."

Eva smiled slightly then pointed at the upturned bucket next to him.

"Can I sit down?"

He shrugged.

"I don't mind."

She moved gracefully and resumed staring at him.

"You look more like her than you'd think. Of course, I'm referring to her as a child."

Curt sat up.

"What was she like?"

Eva shrugged.

"Very…intense. She would always focus completely on the task at hand. She would do everything in her power to be the best she could. But I don't know how much was her and how much was just…desperation. But she was kind. She was always kind. When I fell, she picked me up. When I couldn't continue, she carried me. When I was injured, she protected me. I owed her my life, countless times over."

Curt smiled.

"She owed you hers."

Eva laughed bitterly.

"How? How could I ever save her?"

"Maman said you stopped them breaking her. She said you made her Xii, not Weapon X-ii."

Eva smiled sadly.

"When we first met, she didn't understand smiling. I smiled and she just looked blank. I couldn't understand. How could you not understand a smile?"

She sighed.

"I didn't understand then. I do now. She had nothing to smile about."

Curt looked over.

"Did you find your family?"

Eva shrugged.

"My parents were killed –civil war, barely a small scuffle –doubt it even made the news here. One of my older brothers is dead as well. Another is married –has two kids, one called Eva. Makes me think he didn't know. The last of the brothers I knew is in a local militia. And I also have a baby sister. Catherine. She's in university. I may go and visit her. One day. Maybe. What about Xii –sorry, Tora?"

Curt shrugged.

"Grandpapa and Maman get –got on quite well. He's cool. He took me fishing. Grandmama… Not so much. Her and Maman never really got on. They had a big fight. I don't think Grandmama approves of Dad."

Eva smiled sadly.

"At least her parents looked for her. Mine gave me up when they found out I was a mutant."

Curt smiled sadly.

"They told me that. The people who took me. They said Maman and Dad abandoned me. I didn't realise exactly how much that hurt Maman when I said that. Or how much losing me destroyed her."

He looked away.

"She was a good mother. She didn't think she was, but she was good. She… She knew how to balance protectiveness with giving me a chance to live my own life."

Eva smiled softly.

"I got that. Just the way everyone speaks about her."

Curt smiled back at her, and this time it was genuine.

"Thanks… I have class but… can we do this again?"

Eva smiled.

"Of course."

Phoenix smiled softly as Curt rose and walked away.

"That healed him more than he could possibly know."

The masked woman shrugged.

"Yes. It did."

Logan woke to the soft, insistent knocking on the door. Blearily, he looked up.

"Yeah?"

The door creaked open. If Tora had still been alive, she'd have oiled it –she hated creaking doors –but as it was, it was left creaking.

"Dad?"

"Jamie?"

"I can't sleep."

Logan groaned and lifted the covers.

"Come on then."

Ice cold feet pressed up against his legs and a head snuggled into his chest. At times, you forgot that Jamie was just six –he was too bright –but he was still a child. Still a kid who'd lost his mother and wanted comfort. Logan wrapped his arms around his son and smoothed his hair back.

"It's going to be okay, kid. It's going to be okay."

He just wished he believed it himself.

"He's not grieving very well. Curt's managing much better than he is."

Phoenix shrugged.

"That's Logan for you. He held his emotions too close to his heart."

Wanda sat on the park bench, staring ahead blankly. So long ago –it felt like millennia, but it had only been some seven years back –she had sat here with Tora…

The air was cool, the smell of spring fading into summer was thick in the air –according to Tora at least. Wanda groaned as she allowed herself to sit on the bench. Tora –not quite as far along as she was, and not carrying twins –sat down a lot more gracefully and then handed Wanda the bag of doughnuts. She herself was glumly looking over at the coffee stand. Wanda laughed.

"Uh, uh. No caffeine."

She looked back at Wanda pleadingly.

"One cup can't hurt that much, can it?"

"One cup leads to another."

"But I can smell the coffee!"

Wanda laughed.

"You get used to it. At least you don't have Tony swanning around with far too much coffee."

Tora groaned again.

"I'm dying for a cup! I haven't had one for months!"

Wanda patted her back.

"Get used to it."

Tora glanced over.

"What makes you think I ever want another kid? I kept puking all through the night, I can't have coffee and I resemble an inflatable whale."

Wanda laughed.

"Cheek! Anyway, you look fine. Just… You know… pregnant."

"I still feel fat."

"Does Logan agree?"

Tora wrinkled her nose.

"No. It irritates me."

Wanda laughed.

"Oh, you're so…silly about all this."

Tora playfully swatted Wanda around the head.

Wanda felt hot tears sliding down her face. She looked out over the still lake, set alight by the lights of New York.

"Goodbye…"

Phoenix looked away sadly.

A.N. Yes, I know I've only just come back, but I'm off again, and I don't know when or how often I'll have Internet access. Sorry. S-99