Disclaimer: I CLAIM THIS FANFIC IN THE NAME OF FANATIC!
*Calvin and Hobbes are still owned by Watterson, WG owns Sally, and I own all the OC's BUT Sally.*
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Day 2, Week 1 of School year
"And this," Belle said, as she finished the math problem. "…is the answer, 87." She pointed to the answer and tapping it with the chalk. She looked over her students. "So did anybody NOT get that right, besides Calvin?"
"HEY!" The six year old shouted. "It's not MY fault I got the wrong answer!" he held up his notebook.
Belle walked over and took the notebook and stared at it, then her eyes went wide, then narrowed, then she blinked, turned red in the cheeks, rolled her eyes, and set it back down on his desk.
"I don't even want to know.." She said under her breath. As she turned back to the board out of the corner of her eye she saw Calvin, once again raising his hand. She groaned and turned.
"Yes Calvin?" She asked with a groan. The rest of the class sighed knowing full well that like the first day it not only wouldn't end well but they would also get a break from learning.
Calvin put his hand down and looked at Belle. "My dad once said that at one point he had to do math on an Abduces when he was younger and that it would take him, oh, around a couple of minutes, three at the most to calculate math problems until he bought his first calculator that did stuff that his brain would take minutes to calculate would do it in seconds!"
Belle raised an eyebrow and crossed her arms. "Is there a point to this or are you just talking to hear yourself talk?"
Calvin glared at her. "I mean that why don't we just hand over all math functions to the machines and go have Recess all day."
Belle snorted back a laugh, but kept a stern face. She walked over to Calvin's desk, "Okay Calvin we can do that, and then why don't we allow machines to do more like do our chores, walk our dogs, open doors, and stuff like that until the point where us Humans are lazy slobs and then, we get TAKEN OVER BY A MACHINE REBELLION UPON WHICH WE WILL BE SLAVES TO MACHINES!"
Calvin's eyes went wide and he gaped at Belle as she smiled innocently and then walked back to the front of the room.
Suddenly she heard the sound of something hitting the floor. She turned, to see that Moe had thrown his calculator the ground in fear of it, then stomped on it. "No way am I going to be a slave to some dumb machine!" he sneered.
Calvin laughed as Belle face-palmed.
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Same Day
10:55 PM
A truck roared up to a hunting store just outside Calvin's town. It turned around and drove into the Cargo area of the store, where it put on its breaks.
Inside, Cal-R retracted his legs and his height back to normal and looked over at Beth who was staring at him. "Are you ready for this?" She asked.
"My mission is to fulfill your wants and desires even at the cost of my own life." Cal-R said. "My existence is but to serve you."
Bet smirked evilly as she opened her door and got out, and Cal-R followed suit. They walked toward the back loading area of the closed store. Beth looked at the large locked door…which Cal-R promptly kicked open.
"Nice work." She said happily as she walked in towards a large series of crates.
Cal-R ripped open one of the crates and they both looked inside seeing ammunition used for the hunting rifles, she looked at Cal-R and sniffed. "Wrong crates".
Cal-R responded by running over and ripping open another crate, also filled with ammo, he ran over to another one and tore it open, more ammo, ammo, ammo, ammo, ammo, pizza cutters, ammo.
Beth gritted her teeth and growled, "I thought that this was place sold GUNS not ammo." She looked around as well until she found a crate labeled "WARNING GUNS ARE IN HERE DO NOT OPEN IF YOU ARE UNDER THE AGE OF 40! …unless you're a crazy author trying to save the world from crazy hamsters."
Beth grinned and pointed toward the crates as Cal-R walked over and tore it open. True to the label it held the weapons.
"Perfect." She said with a nasty grin, as she and Cal-R began grabbing the firearms.
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Day 3
"…And that, class, is why scientists aren't always correct and Pluto should be named as a planet." Belle said after writing a long debate on the chalk-board. "Any questions?"
Calvin's hand shot up.
Belle sighed- she should have known. "Yes, Calvin?"
"I have to disagree with your statement, Ms. Belle. Scientists have discovered many things throughout the centuries- from fossilized remains of dinosaurs and cavemen to discovering uses of electricity." the six-year-old said, matter-of-factly. "Therefore, I think it's best to trust their own judgements."
"True, scientists have discovered plenty of things- yet sometimes we have reasons to disagree with them, specifically how the universe was created and how we came to be. Some scientists call it the 'Big Bang Theory' and Darwin's Theory and stuff like that, while others of us prefer to believe in The Bible and that God created everything."
Calvin crossed his arms, defiantly. "But what about proof of dinosaurs and other fossilized remains? How do you explain THAT?"
"I have my own theory on that. Do you recall the tale of Noah's Ark, how the world was filled with so much evil that God flooded the earth, and had Noah and his family gather two of every animal? I believe that the dinosaurs and a few other species had to stay behind- which was a good idea, because if they were still around we'd all be dead in seconds."
"And the cavemen?"
"I think those were the remains of all the evil people- they probably mutilated each other so much that some of them probably had deformities that rendered them as the brainless apes they were… In other words, I think they were your ancestors."
Calvin sneered, and Moe laughed. "Hey, that's the first time no one made that sort of joke about me!" the bully laughed.
"But, I have no proof of it. Sometimes only God has the real answers- scientists have theories, I have theories, we all have theories… but that's all they are- theories. Assumptions. Guesses. None of us really know the truth of these things. We have the liberty and freedom to believe in what we want- whether it be science or religion- and to share our ideas with those willing to listen."
The class applauded and Calvin only rolled his eyes.
"Any more questions?"
"Yeah- how did we go from science to philosophy?" Calvin remarked.
"Simple. You started a debate, I responded- and now it's time for art-class. Everyone, draw a picture of what you believe the world will be like in 200 years… Calvin, you leave your picture blank."
"WHAT?! WHY?!"
Belle scoffed. "Because I'veseen the kind of stuff you draw up, and I doubt any of us have the stomachs to see what you'd display."
Calvin grumbled and crossed his arms. This teacher was getting on his nerves!
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12:44 PM (same day)
Beth and Cal-R stood in an old warehouse, looking over blue-prints after their successful raid… and having trouble with the directions.
"Hold it, these directions are in three different languages!" Beth sneered, reading some blue-prints spread out on a table.
"Master, one of the gun-barrels snapped upon insertion." Cal-R said, though Beth wasn't paying attention.
"It starts in English, then it goes into German, and then Japanese!"
Cal-R held up a wielder. "Let me try to weld it back on."
"Why do all directions have to be written in foreign languages? I thought this was America!"
"Oh, dear… I melted it down too much…"
"You'd have to be a World War I and II veteran to figure this out…"
"Master, I hope you don't mind having one less gun, because this thing isn't getting fixed anytime soon."
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Day 4
"Alright, class, I have a special surprise today." Belle announced that morning.
"You didn't crash your car into the teacher's lounge?" Candace asked.
"We won't be hearing loud techno music playing at recess?" Ronald asked.
"You became a fan of a different show?" Claire asked.
"You found some way to keep Calvin's mouth shut?" Filthy Rich asked.
"No, no, no, and not yet." Belle replied. "Today, a college friend of mine is coming in to serve as a Teacher's Aid for the rest of the semester."
"I thought you said it was a special surprise," Calvin scoffed.
"Calvin, don't make me break out the paddle!"
"I thought teacher's weren't allowed to spank their students anymore," Susie responded.
"Well, that's one problem with society today- lack of discipline. …Now then, before I set Calvin in the corner with the Dunce cap again, I'd like you all to give a warm welcome to my friend, Maxamillion Smith."
With that intro, in walked a young man with slightly messy dark-brown hair, wearing glasses, a long coat, a fez, and a T-shirt with the Full Metal Alchemist symbol on it… and having a bearded dragon resting on his shoulder. "You can call me 'Max'," he said after Belle introduced him. He held up his dragon. "Would anyone care to hold our new class pet?"
Several hands shot up into the air. "Not you, Calvin!"
Calvin pouted.
Max handed the lizard to Sally, then stood in front of the class. "Alright, allow me to share a few things about myself," he said. "I like Harry Potter, anime, Sam and Max comics, horror movies, violent videogames that include bashing zombies and Kingdom Hearts, and anything sci-fi; I hate Twilight, Justin Bieber, and anyone who picks on the weak and/or disabled, and will mutilate anyone who does so. …Any questions?"
The class was silent- even Calvin.
Susie's hand was raised.
"Yes?" Max asked.
"Are you The Doctor?" she asked, referring to the series Doctor Who, as Max had a striking resemblance to David Tennant.
Max turned to Belle. "I wish they'd stop asking that." he whispered, then turned to Susie. "…Yes. And no, we're not taking an interstellar field trip. …That's only for the sixth graders."
"Alright, normally this is the time where we study our English and Grammar… but Max has a different idea." Belle said.
"Who all would like to learn how to write fan-fictions?" Max asked, handing everyone notebooks. He paused at Calvin's desk. "Calvin, I've heard a lot from you- keep it decent."
Calvin rolled his eyes. "Great. There's TWO of them now…" he muttered.
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Same day, a different time, blah blah blah…
Beth and Cal-R looked over at the school from across the street. "Alright, lets sneak over and scout around, learn what class Calvin will be in, find out his schedule, and then take him out when the moment is right!" she whispered as they walked towards the building.
"Master, shouldn't we have brought weapons for defense?" Cal-R asked.
"This is only a scouting mission! Plus, it's a SCHOOL- not a bank. There's no reason for us to bring weapons- not until we set up a trap for Calvin."
Suddenly there was barking just then, and a pack of attack dogs came running at them!
"GOOD LORD! RUN FOR IT!"
They shot off. "What kind of school has attack dogs?!"
"Well, master, there have been many school-shootings so they must have taken measures to keep the grounds safe. …Plus, CALVIN goes here."
"Just run!"
"Shouldn't I vaporize them with my arm-cannon?"
"No- we can't cause a scene just yet and let that brat know we're here! We'll have to try a more stealthy approach."
Five minutes later…
The guard-dogs were keeping alert… when suddenly they saw a cat run by, and they chased after it.
"Works every time," Beth said, popping out of the bushes as they ran for the entrance. "Go, go, go, go, go!"
But they didn't get far, as they saw a more horrifying sight.
"GUARD FLAMINGO'S WHY THE HECK DO THEY HAVE GUARD FLAMINGOS!" Beth shouted as they ran away from the pink birds. "AS IF THE DOGS WERE NOT ENOUGH!"
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Later that Same day
"i'm telling you Hobbes it's NUTS" Calvin said as he munched on a candy bar, as they walked home from the Town's General store, both with a new Comic Book in hand
Hobbes looked at his Candy Bar. "No I think that' 100% Chocolate." Hobbes stated as he munched on his own.
"i'm talking about the Teacher, named Belle, she's absolutely NUTS, INSANE, AND ABOVE ALL ELSE,!"
"C\Walking down the sidewalk toward us!" Hobbes exclaimed suddenly.
"Exactly, WHAT!?" Calvin exclaimed in shock.
He looked and saw his teacher walking down the street, he freaked out and ran into an allyway, as Belle walked down, and than looked at him. Belle looked at him surprised and than patted his head and rubbed it. "Good Kitty." She said sweetly and than walked away.
Hobbes watched her and turned to face Calvin. "She seems nice enough."
Calvin rolled his eyes.
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Chapter Co Written by WG..nExt Chapter it REALLY picks up ^^
No flameing...OR ELSE!