Chapter Twenty Four
A/N: No reviewers.
Marius crumpled the sheet of paper, throwing it to the floor in frustration. He had to be careful- the prison guards had only given him three leaves, begrudging even that- but it was so difficult to find the right words. How could he express a heart full of love, a life never lived, in only one sheet of paper?
The young man sighed, leaning his head back against the cold stone wall. He still could not believe it had come to this. A couple of days ago, he had confessed his love for Éponine, and she had confessed hers in return. They ought to have been happy for years on end. And yet now, it had all come to this.
Swallowing his tears, Marius put pen to paper once more. True, he wanted the note to be perfectly crafted, but he could not stop himself for the sake of perfection. He would never forgive himself if he left this earth without expressing those valuable truths, no matter how clumsily he did so.
My dearest 'Ponine,
I realise this note is far shorter than either of us would have wished, but I still feel the words it contains need to be written. By the time you read this letter, I will be dead, and much as I regret to admit it, I will never have seen you after we were torn apart at the tree where we spent so many happy memories. I hope it does not spoil the place for you; I could not bear to think that. After all the heartache we have gone through together, I must think that there is something good left of it.
I do not have much space in which to make these confessions, so I must cut straight to the chase. I love you, 'Ponine, more than I have loved any other in all my life. I always thought of myself as something of a scholar, but nothing I read ever came close to describing my feelings for you. I suppose there are some things even books cannot explain.
Tomorrow morning, I shall go to the gallows, but do not be sad for me. I will carry with me the thoughts of what might have been, the wedding we shall never have, the children who shall never be born. It ought to upset me, and in some ways it does, but those dreams are the purest I have ever known, and they are comforting to me, even knowing they will stay as dreams. I hope you can find the strength one day to think of those dreams as happily as I do.
This is the part of my words for you that I will find the hardest, and I may be vain in my hope that you will struggle a little with it as well. I know that a happy family has been your heart's desire since you were young, and I want you to have that, even if it will not be with me. You need to find a good man, one who deserves you and won't look for their own gain out of your relationship, and I give you my blessing now to do that. Do not let thoughts of what might have been hold you back. Live your life to the full; so long as you think of me once in a while, you will be living my life as well as your own.
I love you, Éponine, and I am so sorry it had to end this way,
All my love your whole life long,
Marius.
Marius waited for the ink to dry, but he did not read the words over again. He could not stand to see his deepest thoughts and emotions reflected back at him. It had cracked his heart to write them, but to read the contents of the letter, and imagine how Éponine would read it later, would surely crush the broken shards to powder. Instead, he placed a gentle kiss to the page, then folded it up and placed it on the floor in the centre of the room. A guard had taken pity on him and had agreed to find Éponine after the execution was done. Marius could only hope the man would be true to his word.
As he sat in silence, his head rested against the wall behind him, the young man could not help but wonder how time could go by so slowly. It seemed even his heart knew he was going to his death come dawn, for it seemed to beat slower with every moment that passed. 'Perhaps I'll die here,' the man thought morbidly. 'Before I ever reach the gallows. From what I've seen of them, perhaps that would be for the best.'
Marius' eyes fluttered closed and he thought of Éponine, of where she was or what she was doing. Above all else, he hoped she was not crying. The young woman had always been strong, steadfast as a statue; he could never stand to see her cry.
Suddenly, an almighty crash erupted from the wall behind him, clouds of dust billowing out from the stone. Marius leapt away from the wall, raising his hand to shield his eyes for the dirt. That was when he saw her, stood in the gap where the window bars had once been, shining like an angel from above.
Éponine.
The young woman was quick to reach down into the cell, offering a supporting hand to lift him out of it. The moment he was freed of his prison, Marius locked 'Ponine in such a fierce embrace that it almost knocked the both of them to the ground.
"Oh, 'Ponine." the man sighed, stroking her hair gently. "I thought I would never see you again."
"I wasn't going to let that happen." she answered defiantly, the same fire that was so inherently her that it made Marius beam with joy. "I need you here with me, so I did what I had to do to make it happen. And now it has."
"Now it has." Marius agreed, raising his head from where it had rested on his beloved's shoulder. In the dirt, he could see the window bars that had once secured his cell, attached to a length of strong rope. It must have taken such strength to pull those bars free. Far more strength than a slight girl could possess.
And then he saw them.
The strength of the joy he had felt when he saw 'Ponine was matched by the anguish he felt seeing the group of men accompanying her. The men were rough-looking, weathered skin and scars that could only have been created in some kind of vicious brawl. Their leader was the smallest among them, and yet he seemed to exude power as he smirked maliciously, immensely satisfied with the way his deal had turned out. It was only then that Marius realised the truth.
"Oh, 'Ponine." he sighed, holding the girl at arm's length. "What have you done?"
A/N: Well, that letter was one of the most difficult things I've ever written, so I hope you enjoyed it. Please review!