Hogan vs. Quark
by 80sarcades
Deep Space Nine
One week later
"...and you still can't charge me with anything, Odo!" Quark argued in a never ceasing argument as the pair stepped off the transport. "I'm merely an innocent businessman!" He tried, and failed, to slip from the shapeshifter's grip and growled in frustration at yet another failure. "Besides you have no proof!" He added indignantly. "All of that so-called kemacite is gone! Along with my ship," the Ferengi bartender bitterly added, this time truthfully sincere.
The constable harumphed, unimpressed. "We'll let the arbiter decide your guilt, Quark," he growled as he walked his charge onto Deep Space Nine. "In the meantime, you can enjoy the comforts of a holding cell."
"Excuse me," a new voice called out. The lawman and his prisoner, both annoyed at being interrupted, turned to see a human male wearing a black nondescript uniform. A silvery tube, carried in the his right hand, proved to be more interesting than the man himself.
"That looks a little big to be a neuralyzer, whoever you are," Odo idly commented. Quark and the stranger gave him a blank look.
"Sorry," he said unapologetically. "Doctor Bashir was kind enough to show me a human movie...but never mind. Who are you?"
The figure bowed slightly. "Geoffrey Borren. Federation Archive Service," he replied in a flat, almost emotionless tone. "You must be Constable Odo." He flicked his eyes to the left without moving his head. "Would I be correct in assuming your name is Quark?"
"We are," the security officer's displeased voice snapped to both statements. "What is this about?"
"I have a message for you."
Odo stiffened as Geoffrey used his fingers to undo a catch on one end of the tube. A small puff of white vapor, vaporizing in the station's air, slowly escaped from the newly opened seam. The pair watched in fascination as the lid swiveled outward on hidden hinges before locking into place with a soft click. The representative then used his slender fingers to retrieve two off-white objects from the depths of the tube before the cap was rotated back into place. The thin man then carefully, if not reverentially, handed an envelope apiece to the shapeshifter and the merchant with a solemn air of formality.
Paper envelopes.
The Ferengi's interest suddenly peaked at the interesting twist. Quark couldn't remember the last time anyone actually used paper outside of the Rules of Acquisition.
"Sign here," the man brusquely ordered before he held out a PADD. Quark and Odo casually thumbed the reader before the device disappeared into a small bag on the stranger's shoulder.
"Thank you," Geoffrey said stiffly, his voice as emotionless as a desert. "Have a good day." He turned to leave before the shapeshifter's voice stopped him.
"Just a minute," Odo inquired. He held up his envelope. "What, exactly, are these?"
"That's not my place to know," the messenger smoothly replied. "I was merely instructed to deliver these messages after Stardate 51954.6." The man gave the duo a small smile of satisfaction. "Obviously, I have done so."
"And just who was the sender?" the security chief pressed though the answer was readily apparent. The same thought suddenly occurred to Quark as well. He warily eyed his envelope - marked with his name in the human tongue, of all things! - with an air of foreboding.
Geoffrey gave his interrogator an indifferent look before he let a resigned breath escape his lips. "I do not concern myself with the origin of the messages," he declared haughtily. "Merely to their successful delivery." He paused. "Will there be anything else?"
Odo merely shook his head.
"Then I bid you good day." With that crisp farewell he departed leaving behind two very confused beings. The security chief merely rolled his eyes before he looked at the envelope with unabashed curiosity.
"I'd rather not know, if it's all the same to you," Quark mumbled, eyeing the message with distaste. "Besides, he's dead anyway," he pointed out. "What difference does it make?"
The taller man looked at him in annoyance. "And here I had forgotten how the Ferengi treat their dead," he said acidly.
"At least we value their remains and treat them with dignity," the bartender retorted.
"Only until the highest bidder...or bidders, rather...take possession," Odo said, his ire rising by the moment. Quark merely shrugged.
"Nothing like going out on the top...bid," he said innocently, needling the shapeshifter once more.
Odo merely grunted before he reformed his index finger into a slim knife that barely made a whisper as it sliced through the top flap of his envelope. He withdrew a thin letter from within and read the contents before a deep chuckle tore itself from his throat.
And then, much to Quark's horror, the constable started to laugh.
"What's so funny?" the alien demanded, a sinking feeling permeating his stomach as he looked at his longtime nemesis. Odo gave him a bemused stare.
"Why don't you open your envelope?" he teased, an air of humor curling on his thin lips. The smug look infuriated the bar owner though he tried his best not to show it. Angrily, he ripped the container open and removed the contents in one swift motion. To his surprise a picture slipped from the closed letter and fell onto the floor. Quark picked it up-
...and froze in disbelief. The old-style paper photo showed a pile of Kemacite in all its colorized glory sitting in the cargo area of a Ferengi ship.
His ship. He looked up just in time to see a copy of the same damnable photo clutched in the security officer's fingers.
"You know, I rather think I like General Hogan," Odo deadpanned, satisfaction permeating his soft tones. "He was pretty interesting, for a human. Not to mention smart if he figured out how to deliver these. How...?" He pondered the question silently before he grinned with the answer.
The PADD, he realized. He must have seen the stardate somehow. And since I told him I was from Deep Space Nine...
"An interesting human," Odo repeated, unable to keep the humor - much less sincere admiration - out of his voice. The bartender rounded on him.
"And how would you know?" Quark demanded, indignation clouding his features. "You..." Just then, a bolt of belated realization finally struck home. "You knew!" he growled accusingly, pointing at the letter in the changeling's hand. "You were talking to Hogan the entire time!"
The security chief merely harrumphed in response. "Hardly," he replied, though there was something behind the misshapen features Quark couldn't immediately identify. "Although I may have mentioned a few tidbits here or there."
"And I bet you enjoyed that!" the Ferengi yelled, rising to the moment. "You probably revealed yourself right after we arrived!"
"I had better things to do than talk to strange humans…at least at first!" Odo flared, though he kept his temper in check. "Namely, I was trying to figure out how to help you escape!"
"And then you went to Hogan!" the bartender finished. "Some help you were." Strangely, the shapeshifter seemed withdrawn for some reason. Quark, sensing victory, went in for the kill.
"Admit it, Odo," he pressed in a low voice. "You probably waited until he was alone. Then you…" The hint of uncharacteristic embarrassment that showed on the other being's face stopped him in his tracks.
"Not...exactly..." his nemesis murmured, suddenly reluctant to speak.
"And what does that mean?" the other being asked, now curious.
"If you must know..." A pained grimace of embarrassment settled briefly over Odo's features before reasserting their normally placid form. "...he caught me."
A/N: