Jim came around slowly. At first he just lay there, bright lights searing into his skull. The metronome of steady beeps fading in and out of focus. Distantly, he was aware of the solid warmth at his back. The soft touches trailing down his side. The rightness settled deep in his gut. When his eyes grew tired, he blinked. Time passed, people bustled through the room. More than once, he made out his mother's voice. A few times there was a phantom ache in his back. Memories which made him want to retch, scream and struggle. Every time, a large hand would settle across his forehead and the reaction would stop. He'd feel calm and peaceful again. The hand would then trail down his cheek, follow the curve of his jaw and brush ever so lightly against his lips.
It felt like love and care and Jim didn't want it to end. He knew, without a shadow of a doubt, that when they did, it would start to hurt again. His body, mind and soul. So he clung to the soft presence inside his head. Clung to it like a child and wished it never to leave. Surely, he would break under the pressure.
Three days passed, each as unproductive as the last. The only time Jim felt any real awareness was when Spock left. In the brief moments of clarity, Jim remembered. His brain threw every detail at him. Every person who served with him. Every man, woman and child he'd been there to help. Hoshi, Kevin, Zayra, Thomas, David. Sam. Not his Sam but another, clearly a scientist with an appreciation for antiques and a fiancée who supplied his meagre library. He could see his brother in that. Could see Aurelan in the girl who'd penned message after message in the covers. It hurt his head and his heart.
When Spock was gone far longer than his customary 5-10 minutes, Jim's thoughts spiralled. Worries, for the others, for Phil and Abbey, for Xverjabdene and Nidiss, the kids, swirled round and round. His mind was not a comforting place. Not the safe haven he'd once thought of it. He was alone and vulnerable and- Spock was back.
Instead of crawling back into bed and wrapping his body around Jim, he sat at the chair placed flush against it's side. A hand encased Jim's and he was no longer alone. The warmth of Spock's mind settled against his own. They were now distant enough not to be drugged by Spock's mere presence and could focus on other things. Like the small army who had somehow invaded his room.
Abbey helped David scramble onto the bed and across the covers to Jim's side. Kevin was already tucking himself in, resting his head over Jim's steadily beating heart. Zayra and Thomas followed more cautiously. They sat on opposite sides of the bed, leaning lighting into his knees. By the door, Nidiss sniffled. The sound startled Xverjabdene, who's silver eyes widened when she watched tears tracking down green cheeks. Phil sighed and scrubbed a hand down his face, probably lamenting about his choice of friends. All of whom were marginally crazy. Abbey just laughed, an honestly happy, relieved sound.
Without conscious thought, everyone was soon echoing it. The urge just bubbled over. Even Spock looked vaguely emotional. He wasn't laughing, not by a long shot. His eyes were dancing in that way they did after Jim had done something stupid yet still came home in one piece. Affectionate, the look was all affection and relief, mixed with the promise of a personal health and safety lecture later. Struggling for breath, Jim held up an empty hand, imaginary champagne flute within his grasp. He could feel Spock sigh in his mind, a curious sensation he'd definitely have to explore later.
"To making it out of that hell hole in only a few pieces." Jim toasted, clinking his imaginary glass with everyone else's. As one, they pretended to throw back their imaginary alcohol like a shot.
Jim took stock of his friends, the faded bruises along Abbey's neck, jaw and cheek. Phil's broken arm. The protective way Xverjabdene watched everyone, ready to step in at the first sign of anyone's distress. The tired lines around Nidiss' eyes that spoke of long nights, little food, cold temperatures and a truck full of anxiety. Zayra's pearly white hair, faintly glowing with the force of her feelings. Thomas' wary eyes, watching everything like he expected it to be taken away. The way Kevin kept reaching out and taking grapes from the fruit bowl someone left by his bedside and stashing them. More pointedly, the way everyone ignored the behaviour. David's unconscious body, head resting on his outstretched arm. The warm grip of Spock's mind. A promise to never let go.
Eventually, Abbey and Xverjabdene came forward and plucked David and Kevin's sleeping forms from Jim's bed. They murmured a quiet goodbye, promising to come back when they'd finished their scheduled meeting with the admiralty. Nidiss and Zayra came forward and kissed him on the cheek, Nidiss throwing rather suggestive looks between Spock and himself. Thomas had glared at Phil, waiting until the older man left the room before launching himself into Jim's arms. They stayed curled in an embrace for a minute or two, before Spock warned them of approaching footsteps. Thomas slipped off the bed and nodded once to Spock before wrenching the door open and striding into the hall.
"That kid has way too much attitude for a ten year old." Phil said as he slipped through the door. He held a medical bag in his fee hand, walking around Jim's bed and grabbing the PADD on the table.
"I'm pretty sure he's twelve, Phil." Jim replied, keeping an eye on the doctor. Phil was probably the most gentle doctor Jim had ever met. One of the nicest too. Not at all condescending, totally patient, pretty much the exact opposite of his usual demeanour. It was almost like he slipped into a totally different person. Jim had even made the mistake of telling him that once. His neck throbbed for three days.
"So, you're stay earned you multiple lacerations, two broken ribs, blood poisoning, hypothermia, dangerous weight loss, a nice dose of mental instability and a husband. Good job Jimmy." Phil put down the PADD and turned to face him. A penlight was suddenly pulled from the bag, light shining straight into Jim's eyes.
"Your responses are good." Phil muttered, waving the light from side to side. "Okay, roll over so I can take a peak at your back."
Jim did as he was told, knowing instinctively that their would be consequences if he didn't. Last time he had been stubborn, Phil refused to give him a lollipop. As a patient, it was his right to a free sweet with every painful consultation. It just went to show that Phil was a sick and twisted individual.
"Well, you're looking pretty good. Little to no scaring. Skin a little tender?" Phil asked, brushing it lightly with the base of his palm as he swept a tricorder over it. Jim flinched, memories of different hands on his skin burning bright in his mind. Spock flowed forward, mind embracing and protective, soothing the panic and hurt.
"Physically, you're gonna be fine kiddo. Just take it easy and lean on Spock when you need it." Phil sighed and ruffled Jim's hair. "Call me if you need anything Jimmy. I'm glad you're okay." With that, Phil left the room, door clicking shut behind him.
Jim closed his eyes. The bed hissed as Spock joined him, arms instantly drawing him into a hard chest. Jim felt safe. Tired enough to sleep for another few days, this time without sedatives. And yet, he was confused, a little hurt and anxious to get answers from his Vulcan. Especially while they had time to themselves. Who knew how much longer Sarek was holding Winona and Amanda at bay. Maybe he should get him a thank you hamper. He was about 95% sure the Vulcan who rescued him was Sarek. Which meant that Spock got his badassery from his father. Totally awesome.
"You wish for me to explain." Spock stated, drawing Jim from thoughts of Sarek in spandex. Maybe it was Spock who deserved a hamper. But then, that just led to the thought of Spock in very tight synthetic material. Which wasn't necessarily a bad thing. In fact, it was sort of hot.
"Jim, please focus." Spock sighed -actually sighed- as Jim began to squirm a little. It wasn't his fault! He just felt a little hot, like he had an itch just under his skin. Something Spock could scratch with his-
"James. Stop." Spock commanded, pulling Jim flush against his chest and holding him there. "Do you want answers or not?"
Jim pouted but stilled. Being this close to Spock was good enough. And, he did want answers. He was just a little afraid of what they might be.
"After receiving your message, I sent it to T'Pau who took it before the High Council. As it would have been illogical for me to remain with my posting when I could no longer perform to the best of my abilities, Admiral Archer gave me leave and I travelled to Vulcan. I got there in time to argue for your proposal. Once it was accepted, our fleet was mobilised and crews gathered. We shipped out, arrived in time to receive a weak signal from a group of Starfleet survivors. I'm told my father led a group into the city." Spock relayed.
It sounded heavily edited and answered none of Jim's questions. Actually, it added more.
"Wait, start from the beginning. Why couldn't you stay with Archer's Super Secret Club? Why didn't you come down to find me?" Jim asked, cursing the way his voice broke in his last question. He'd been so sure Spock would come for him and then he didn't. Not really. Not the way Jim needed him to.
"Ashayam, this began long before Tarsus." Spock began, voice soft. "You recall the meld T'Pau broke? It spontaneously linked our minds. We are t'hy'la."
With infinitely careful movements, Spock's hands cradled Jim's body. He felt himself be lifted and turned over. Face to face, blue bored into brown. Spock's eyes seemed so old and tired. Like he was buckling under the weight of entire worlds.
"Your mind is the most beautiful thing I have ever felt, even filled as it was, with disgust and contempt. It has been the perfect bitter sweet agony, joined to you." Spock paused, letting the information sink in. Never had Jim felt like more of a fuck up.
"Although we do not share a full bond, our link is strong. I have been feeling echoes of your emotional and physical state. When he touched you, when they hurt you, I too suffered." Spock growled, radiating a thinly veiled destructive rage. "A number of medical personnel were required to sedate me and kept me confined to this room."
Jim lifted his hand and traced his fingers over the seam of Spock's lips. He smiled at the soft look in Spock's eyes. It made his heart beat double time. The monitor beside the bed followed the pace, each hurried beep drawing them closer together. Jim's lips met Spock's gently. Nothing more than the slightest pressure pushing against him. One of Spock's hands found its way to his shoulder and pushed him back against the bed.
Spock hovered over him, arms keeping him just centimetres from where Jim wanted him. Brown eyes were almost pitch black with the same desire Jim could feel curling in his gut. The last space between them disappeared as Spock's weight finally settled on Jim. The crush felt heavenly. As did the little sparks of electricity shooting up his arms when Spock interwove their fingers.
Jim arched up as much as he could, rubbing himself shamelessly up and down Spock's body. The hint was clear and heeded. Not a moment later warm lips were back against his own. Spock moved against him, sucking his bottom lip before nipping at it. He swallowed Jim's moans, taking advantage of the opening and sliding his tongue inside his mouth. Spock's tongue was rough and warm and oh so very nice when it trailed along the roof of his mouth. Jim sucked on it. Liking the involuntary thrust which accompanied the action.
"Maybe now's not the best time." Amanda's voice filtered through the lust clouding Jim's mind. As did the slight growl which rumbled from Spock's throat.
"Looks like we're finally getting those grandchildren! Jimmy's just going to be a beautiful mother." Winona added and from his place beneath Spock, Jim watched as they exchanged high fives. Well, that killed the mood.
I hope this can somehow make up for Tarsus?
Guesty: I missed you! I'm glad you're back. I feel like you read my mind. How do you keep doing that?
:D
Just wanted to thank all my reviews and stalker viewers for being amazing, awesome people. Getting notifications from you guys just makes my day. And keeps me writing. ;) I love you!