I do not own anything. I'm just translating. The characters belong to the great J.K. Rowling. The story belongs to the amazing Brigi. Her e-mail: tbwtpbe at hotmail .com

My Beta reader, Makurayami Ookami fixed THIS chapter.

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THE BOY WITH THE PIERCING BLUE EYES

Chapter 3 – The battle of wills

Harry didn't really want to go home now. He went where his legs took him. He didn't have any strength to look Snape in the eye. He was terribly ashamed of himself because of what he said and did. He thought the teacher would never forgive him for this. The more he tried to be polite with him the more trouble he caused.

Things seemed easy and simple yesterday. Now everything was complicated. He was scared of himself; of his violent spirit that was capable of doing that terrible thing. What Lestrange said rang in his ears; his hatred toward Snape became very strong. So strong that he could use the Cruciatus curse.

He knew that it was the first step towards the dark side. He had enjoyed using the 'crucio' on the kneeling man in front of him. He had watched his suffering with cruel pleasure…. Thinking about it made him shudder. It was dark when he arrived back. He went upstairs without a word and saw Dudley lurking near Snape's door. He whispered faintly:

"Wingardium Leviosa!"

The spare key flew out of Dudley's grip.

"Don't sneak around Professor Snape's room!" he warned his cousin before he could say anything. "I know a few transfiguration tricks. I could turn you into a nice little ferret. But you already are one, Big D! Get out of here!" The key flew back into his hand and Dudley ran away quickly. Harry stepped to the door instead.

"Alohomora!" The lock clicked and the door swung open before him.

Harry entered the room. It was semi dark. Snape's not here, he thought. He wanted to go through his stuff but the sound of thunder made him change his mind. He walked to the window and started to watch the weather. After a while, he heard some surprisingly light footsteps coming up the stairs. Someone stood at the door and a faint sneer indicated how annoyed he was that he found it open. He stepped in and threw a paper bag full of bandages on the bed. He was taking off his coat when he stopped in the middle of the movement.

Snape noticed that Harry was staring at him. His heart started to beat nervously, though he had nothing to be afraid of. He reassured himself that it was just a kid and he was an adult, a well educated wizard. He can protect himself if needed. But he was still nervous. His hands moved slowly then he stopped hesitantly and then finally took off his coat and threw it on the end of the bed.

"What are you doing in my room, Harry?" He asked quietly but sharply.

"After what happened last night I thought I needed to come…"

The teacher used a shield and a silencing charm on the door.

"So this is why they didn't hear anything…" the boy said wondering. "Though we were shouting and all…"

"Why did you use the Cruciatus curse on me?"

Harry didn't seem surprised, but he didn't answer immediately.

"Because you were torturing me too." He said and was surprised that Snape didn't even try to warn him to be more polite to him.

"You're wrong!" Snape said casually sitting down on the edge of the bed and started to take off his bandages. "I just showed you a few pictures in your brain. Everything you saw yesterday was already in your head, buried very deep… carefully hidden from your everyday personality so you can live without a care."

Harry's eyes widened in shock. This…can't be… It's a lie…

"You're lying!" He shouted angrily, but in his voice a deep-toned man's voice was heard mixed with his own.

Snape stopped playing with the bandages and instead of telling the boy to be more polite he reached for his wand and stood up. He looked at Harry strictly and held out his hand.

"Harry! Clear your mind!"

"Shut up!" Said the stranger's voice.

"I knew you would feel when the kid's mind becomes weaker…" Snape hissed to himself. "I won't let you hurt the boy! Legilimens!"

He felt an enormous amount of resistance in his mind but he soon realized that it was not Harry's. He recognized the Dark Lord's mind immediately because of the darkness and hate. He never thought about ever trying to Ligitament Voldemort's mind, but now he had to. That was the only way to save the boy. He could feel Harry's scared, agitated mind but he couldn't get near him.

"Let him… go…!" He said feeling the pain passing into his body as well.

He felt a strong boost. He fell to his knees and with one hand gripping the carpet he raised his head. He couldn't stop the connection with the other's mind even if he wanted to. He could barely breathe. It felt like invisible hands began choking him. He scolded himself for not concentrating and started to focus on Voldemort again.

"You will never beat me, you fool! Don't even try!" Voldemort said with triumph in his voice. "The boy is mine! He left the light side!"

"He can right his wrongs!" Snape said angrily and he tried to tell this to Harry. He felt the boy's weak but hopeful response. "You won't…" He groaned because the Dark Lord pressed him firmly again. "…ever get… Harry!" He tried to show Harry images like last night.

The smiling faces of his friends made Harry a little more powerful. His self-confidence began to grow stronger.

"You don't have a chance!" Screamed the voice furiously, trying to suppress the emerging positive, loving feelings. But to no avail. Harry started to fight with all his power when he saw the picture of Marie.

"What? No!"

But the boy destroyed everything like they were black clouds. When his mind was clear he shouted and passed out. But before he fell on the ground Snape caught him. He couldn't lift him because he didn't have enough strength left and the boy was too heavy. But he dragged Harry to the bad and laid him down. He sat down and wiped his sweaty forehead.

Voldemort managed to possess the boy's body and mind again. If he wouldn't have been there Harry would have fall victim to the attack. So he can attack the boy when he's awake now. At the same time he thought that last night's events had an effect on Voldemort too. He felt that Harry was weakened and he struck down. He felt pain for a moment. His Dark Mark started to burn for an instant. That made him shiver. It reminded him when he was a Death Eater too. He felt immense hatred towards Voldemort.

He wondered if He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named realized who saved the boy. Is it possible that he recognized his aura? No, the Dark Lord's not stupid; he obviously knows who stood in his way. Maybe…

The boy whimpered and turned to his side. Snape stopped his contemplation and turned to him. Harry continued wailing and began rubbing his lightning-shaped scar obsessively. The teacher raised his hand to stop him but hesitated and paused. He felt something weird and he looked at the boy almost lovingly. He was horrified, realizing his own reaction and moved further away from the bed. But then Harry's hand swung forward and caught his.

"Don't… leave me… alone! He'll come… back to… kill me…" He said in horror and barely prominently.

"Can you hear me, Harry?" He asked. "Give me some indication that you hear me…"

But the boy just looked at him in silence. He looked pathetic. His eyes were filled with tears. His hair was disheveled and his forehead was red. He didn't even blink. He didn't have the strength to. His whole body was shaking.

"It's okay." Snape said lovingly after a while and stroked the boy's forehead. "It's okay. Stop rubbing it. It won't be better…"

He understood the pain Harry was suffering. He felt the same when he turned his back on the Death Eaters. The mark never disappeared from his arm. It burned and ached constantly. Reminding him of his treachery.

"Try to sleep, Harry! I'll help clean your mind…" He whispered.

These were the last words Harry heard. He fell asleep immediately.

It was late in the morning when he woke up. He was half asleep. He turned to the other side, grabbed a pillow and tried to fall asleep again. He had never slept so well before. And in such a comfortable bed (except his bed in Hogwarts, maybe). 'This bed is…' he smiled. 'It's soft, silky and soothing like a bath of feather.'

He didn't wake once even though there was a storm outside. He could still smell the rain, the fresh, cool summer breeze flew by. He could feel it coming in through the window in the guestroom. He heard noises from outside, slamming of a car door, cars, and clatters of dishes. Most of the neighbors were up and preparing for breakfast. Parents went to work because the new week just started. However Harry was lying in bed with a healthy smile on his face. He scratched his face with a bored gesture and stretched lazily. He scratched his belly too and grinned sardonically. He looked at the commode opposite the bed. On top of it was an old-fashioned clock that showed the time: half past ten.

The fact that he didn't wake up early and went to work didn't bother him. He groaned and pulled the blanket up. He sighed and buried himself in the cushions and tried to fall asleep. Then he heard a reproaching hooting in the silence. The boy raised his disheveled head; his hair looked like a haystack. He looked toward the window squinting as if the light was hurting his eyes.

"H-Hedwig?"

He heard a familiar hoot. However it sounded very annoyed. Harry realized.

"Oh, Hedwig, I'm sorry! I'll give you something to eat! I just… slept sooooo well…" He grinned.

He kneeled on the bed and rubbed his eyes.

Snape stepped in through the open door. He was struggling with the bandage on his wrist. Judging by his annoyed face; he was trying for a while now…

"Mmmm, good morning" Said Harry politely.

Snape stopped and looked up so the bandage fell down.

"It was about time to get up! You've slept enough!"

"S-sorry" Said Harry sheepishly. "I just… slept so well!"

To his surprise, Snape shrugged.

"No wonder you couldn't sleep. Your brain was full of nonsense. If you concentrate on so many things you won't be able to learn either."

"What exactly did you do to my mind last night?"

"I just put everything in place. That's it! It was needed."

"How is this possible?"

"Everything is where it supposes to be. Look!" He said with irritation in his voice when he saw the confusion on the boy's face. "Do you still feel depression about the past? Fear or self-accusation about Sirius' death...?"

Harry bowed his head and appeared to be sad.

"No… but I should…"

"No, you shouldn't!" Snape howled. "You never listen to what I say, do you? To properly learn Occlemency you need to clear your mind from every unnecessary emotion!"

Call off… all emotions? Harry went to his room shivering. It's impossible! Without emotions his life would be completely empty…

He gave a treat to Hedwig then plopped down on his own bed. He clasped his hands and looked up at Snape who followed him and was now leaning on the doorway. He wore a strange expression. Harry couldn't explain it. But the man caught his gaze and watched the owl instead. The boy pulled out a drawer and took out a photo album. The one he got from Hagrid four years ago. He opened it and began browsing. He touched every picture which showed his parents or Sirius.

Snape watched him. He saw the boy staring quietly and sadly at the pictures.

"Don't long for them, Harry." The boy looked up. "It won't be easier if you watch their pictures all day long. They won't be there with you when you're in trouble."

"They… mean everything to me… If they weren't here I would have given up a long ago."

"Because you can't stand on your own two feet. This is why you are weak. And this is why you're an easy prey for the Dark Lord."

"If I deny my emotions I'll become empty and won't have a reason to live. What would be the motivation to defeat him? Weren't… my feelings that saved me last night?"

A muscle twitched on Snape's face and he turned red. He went to the window and looked out.

"It's easy for someone who doesn't have anyone to worry about…." Said Harry resignedly.

The teacher's hands trembled then slowly clenched into fists. He paled. He wanted to slap the insolent kid, but deep in his heart he felt that Harry was right. He stared forward; he felt uncomfortable because he knew the boy was watching him. His face turned gray and he felt the desperation he hadn't experienced for many years.

"Please… forgive me…" Harry said finally. "I didn't want to be disrespectful. I don't have the right to judge you. Anyway… I owe you… you saved my life…"

Silence. No one said anything. Snape turned back and looked into the boy's eyes. He seemed to be very concerned about something. He wanted to say something he just didn't know how to start. Harry realized it so he closed and hugged the photo album and looked at his teacher.

The man sighed.

"Among your memories… I saw that you used to cry a lot when you were a baby." He said slowly. "But… No one ever picked you up…"

Harry was shocked. This is what made Snape concerned?

"At my parent's house or… here at the Dursleys?"

"I think, here… the house seemed familiar…"

Harry smile and thought he understood what the professor wanted to say.

"Thank you for telling me." He said softly but with a smile.

His kindness made Snape surprised. He found himself in a helpless situation. And it was not the first time. He became more and more uncertain as he watched the boy's big eyes. The similarities…

His thoughts were interrupted by a thud. Someone was calling him from the drawer.

"Severus! Severus, answer me!"

Snape recovered immediately and ran into his room. Harry followed him excitedly. Snape took out the mirror.

"Severus Snape!" He said and sat down on the bed.

Harry sat down next to him and watched with his mouth open that the mirror was like the one he got from Sirius.

"It's a…" He started but Snape put his free hand on his mouth and frowned.

"Don't say a word! And you can't be seen in the mirror!"

So Harry hid behind Snape and listened.

Kingsley appeared in the mirror.

"Kingsley! What happened?" He asked suspiciously.

"Tonks was wounded while on a mission. Molly and Remus are taking care of her but she won't be able to work for a while. She has some serious injuries. Those Death Eaters…"

Snape frowned and Harry's heart almost jumped out of his chest. He hoped to finally learn something about what the Order is up to. He was surprised that Snape didn't order him out of the room.

"Understood… I'm on my way."

Kingsley nodded. "Thank you, Severus. Be careful!" Then he disappeared from the mirror.

Harry stood up and looked at the mirror.

"Where did you get it?" He blurted out finally.

"Every Order member has one. This is how we communicate with each other."

"And I broke mine!" Harry slapped his forehead. He jumped off of the bed and ran back to into his room. Harry came back with a mirror frame and some broken glass.

"How did you get one?" Snape asked surprised.

"I got it from Sirius. It was a Christmas present. He said to call him with this if I need him…. After… he died I had a foolish idea; that I can still see him with this. When I realized I can't I threw it away and it shattered."

Snape rolled his eyes. "Reparo!"

The mirror became whole again. Harry smiled. "Cool!"

Snape stood up and went to the drawer. He took out a few things and put them in his pockets and went to the next one. Harry looked up when he heard a rustle.

He saw that Snape was in his robe already. But it was not the usual black robe he used at school. It was an elegant black robe. The borders were dark green and the material was so fine that Harry barely dared to touch it. He hadn't seen such elegant and dignified wizard robes since Lucius Malfoy. Snape continued rummaging among his belongings so he didn't notice Harry watching him. But once he almost fell over him he growled.

"Harry! You've heard I must hurry! Get out of my way!"

The boy stood repentant, but he couldn't not watch him with glittering eyes.

"Where… are you going exactly?"

"It's better if you don't know…"

"So…" Harry started seriously. "You're going to the Death Eaters… They… wear these expensive… and beautiful robes…."

Snape paused for a moment and looked at the boy.

"Don't let the clothes fool you. These don't make you a more powerful wizard. And those who became Death Eaters because of the clothes are fools!"

"It's not what I meant… So this is why you don't wear fashionable clothes ever… so you can forget the Death Eaters easier…"

"Correct!"

"You're going to spy on the Death Eaters, aren't you? This is one of the things that the Order members do, right?"

"W-what? How… do you know that?"

Harry just grinned.

"I don't just play in Hogwarts, you know. Tonks is a metamorphmagus: she can change her appearance. So she can never be recognized. She, Kingsley and Mr. Weasley are watching the Death Eaters in the Ministry. Moody's eye can see through everything. You're a professional when it comes to Occlumency so you can lie to Voldemort too. He will never notice. Plus there are Auror's in the Order and they have a real werewolf too. It's obvious that they keep an eye on the Death Eaters and try to gather as much information about V… the Dark Lord's plans as possible. Am I right?"

Snape didn't know whether he should smile or frown.

"It's reassuring to know that you're so knowledgeable." He said finally. "But we have plenty others tasks too."

"Isn't it dangerous? To be with Death Eaters? To look V… You-Know-Who in the eye? And… what if… someone gets caught?"

The man paused for a moment but then continued without saying anything or looking at the boy. He knew that the boy meant him but he didn't want to see the concern on his face. He never cared about the danger when he went to the Death Eaters. All Order members knew what the risks are and even though they cared about each other they knew there are things worth dying for. Though, Snape never thought that anyone was concerned about him. His role was to bring news and if he failed they'd just have to find a replacement. But now, there is this insolent kid who doesn't say 'professor' or 'sir' when he talks to him; the child of his childhood nemesis… and he is worried about him. He realized it was a pleasant feeling but he tried not to show it. When he found his pockets full enough he stopped and looked around sighing. He tried to figure out what he would forget to take. Then he saw Harry's anxious eyes.

"What is it?" He asked frowning.

"How… will you do this after you fought against V… him last night? You faced the Dark Lord and sure he realized that you were protecting me. What if… it's a trap?"

"That's for me to worry about… He's smart…" He acknowledged silently.

"I…" Harry started then his face lit up like a light bulb. "Wait for me! I'll be back in a moment!" He yelled and ran to his room.

The teacher heard the opening of a truck and some rattling and saw books flying in every direction. Harry came back with a bright greenish-black thing in his hands. "Here!" He placed it in his hands. "Take this with you!"

"What? This…" He asked frowning.

"An invisibility cloak!" The boy grinned.

"You… still have this?"

"Of course! It belonged to my father so I cherish it." The teacher wanted to step on it when he heard this, but he was very impressed by this rare and magical thing that no word came out of his mouth. "I got it for Christmas when I started at Hogwarts. The one who gave it to me didn't sign the letter. But the letter said that my father gave it to him before he died and it's time I get it. I have had it… since then. It's a great thing! We used to roam the school hiding under this. Mr. Filch almost caught us a few times but…" He realized he shouldn't have said that. "So it's very useful."

Snape was clutching the cloak like he would never give it back, but his face turned serious suddenly. "Listen, Harry! What will you reveal next time?"

"That's my business!" Harry said mysteriously. The teacher smiled involuntarily. "Please take it! You'll find it useful! At Christmas I heard that the Order lost Moody's last invisibility cloak when they arrested someone. And when I got this it was written in the letter to 'Use it well.' And I think you can use it better than me right now."

Snape nodded as a sign of consent. This somewhat reassured Harry. The man looked around one last time.

"Harry, listen! I want you to practice while I'm gone! I don't know how long this mission will last but don't do anything impudent! The Order members are watching you but there will be no one close to you. Don't complicate things for them! I'll return as soon as possible!"

Harry nodded and liked the tone he used when he spoke to him. But before he could 'escape' he grabbed Snape's arm.

"If you can't find any memory to cling to… think of me." He said tentatively.

For a long moment they just looked at each other in embarrassment. Harry tried to figure out what kind of affect he had on the professor, but his stone-like face didn't show anything other than dismay. He smiled reassuringly.

"L-let go of my arm, Harry! I can't Apparate."

"Oh, sure." He stepped back.

Snape cocked his head slightly and eyed his student suspiciously. "I must have done something wrong with your mind last night…" He said mischievously and Harry breathed in relief. He closed his eyes for a moment. When he opened them the man was nowhere to be seen. With a faint pop he Apparated from the room…

That's all.

So what's next? Will Snape arrive back safely? What will Harry do while he's gone?

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Hermina