The second part I was talking about in the previous chapter that I already had written that was going to be used in a future chapter is now in this one. I wasn't expecting this all to happen so fast in the story, so I had to go back and change how far along Zoe is. Instead of her being 6 months along in the pregnancy with Boyd she is now 7 months along.
Falling asleep in the chair was the last thing he remembered before total chaos was going on around him. He had been kicked out of the hospital room and forced back to the waiting room that had felt more like a jail than anything else. He was scared and freaking out and the one person that he needed the most he couldn't have in his arms. He didn't even remember calling anyone but Jesse was there shoving a cup of coffee in his hands and Lavon was there to lend his support. He tried to tell them what it was he could remember, but after the erratic beeping of the machines and doctors and nurses rushing into the room, he was at a loss on what was taking place around him.
"Wade, why don't you go outside and get some fresh air," Jesse suggested, getting dizzy from watching his brother walk from one end of the waiting room back to the other end. Wade shook his head; there was no way he was going to leave the waiting room when there was something going on with his wife and son. Everything was supposed to be good, not take a turn for the worse.
"I'm not leaving," Wade told his brother. Waiting was getting tiresome but there was no way he was going to leave when he didn't have the answers he wanted. He really wanted this to be a dream and for it to be over with. He wanted to wake up with Zoe in his arms and his little boy to be healthy in her stomach safe and sound. The way it should be.
"I'm not asking you to leave Wade. I want you to go get some fresh air because you need it," Jesse told him.
"No," Wade told him making Jesse sigh and slump back in his chair.
Wade started to pace again and Jesse closed his eyes with a groan not wanting to deal with his brother. Lavon walked up to Wade and put his arm around him and led him from the small room. Lavon was worried that a fight between brothers was going to start and that was the very last thing any of them needed to deal with. Wade needed to get out of the small room with his emotions on high alert and Jesse even if he didn't want to admit it was scared and worried but he was holding it together for his little brother.
"I said I wasn't leaving," Wade hissed, turning to head back inside coming out of the trance he was in to see that Lavon had led him outside. Lavon was there in his way. "Move!" Wade demanded. Lavon shook his head and crossed his arms over his chest.
"You need to breathe and relax, Wade. We're all worried about Zoe and little Boyd," Lavon started out saying. "It's not doing you any good to let this rage you feel at the universe come out. You need to stay level headed about all of this because Zoe is going to need you when this is all over with."
Wade sighed and fell to the ground, his back resting on the rough brick wall of the hospital. What Lavon said had made sense. "I don't know what to do, Lavon. It feels like my life is falling apart and I can't stop it from happening. I want to help, but I can't. Do you know how that feels?" Wade asked, his head falling to the brick wall looking up at the dark sky.
"No I don't know how that feels, but Wade I wish there was something that I could do to help out as well," Lavon told him with a sigh of his own. "It's not fun watching this thing tear you apart piece by piece."
"You're doing something to help by just being here. You don't have to be here, but thank you for the support Lavon," Wade told him. "You and Jesse have saved me more than once tonight. I can't thank either one of you enough for that."
"You don't have to," Jesse said joining the duo. "We want to be here, Wade. Nothing you can say is going to make us leave." Wade nodded and cracked his first real smile in what he felt like was ages even if it was only a few hours since the last time he smiled. "You doing okay?" Jesse checked.
Wade shook his head. "It feels like my lungs have a shit load of sand in them, like my heart is in this vice and it keeps tightening with every beat and I feel so sick to my stomach that I can't think straight," Wade told them both.
With that being said, they three of them remained quiet listening to life move on all around them. Talking about anything didn't feel right; worrying about what was going on around them made it hard to focus on anything else. Listening to the world around them, breathing in the fresh air the city had to offer was a welcome change from the stuffy waiting room they had been stuck in with the only noise to fill the void was the ticking of the clock that had drove them crazy, so the change in noise was a welcomed one.
It was about an hour later when they headed back inside. On their way back upstairs Jesse had made them stop at the little chapel the hospital had to offer. Wade had stopped at the nurse's station to see if there was an update on Zoe. But the young nurse with a sad expression on her face informed him they hadn't heard anything yet. An eerie silence had taken over the little waiting room they were sitting in. Wade sat in a chair, his head in his hands.
The doctor walked in with a grim expression on his face. Wade could feel the bile rising up his throat. He had to force himself to listen as the doctor told him that they had thought they had everything under control but things had gotten worse with Zoe and that they had tried everything but they just couldn't save his little son. Hearing that he had lost his son the world fell apart and he was on the floor.
"Zoe?" He questioned afraid to hear the answer that was waiting for him.
"She's still in surgery; there have been a few complications along the way. I'm sorry," the doctor told them. "Please if you have any questions don't hesitate to ask," he said. When no one said anything he took that as his cue to leave.
Jesse had gotten up to make the necessary phone calls to let everyone know what was going on. When he entered the waiting room, Wade was up and pacing the room once more. Jesse looked over at Lavon and Lavon shook his head. He wanted to comfort his brother, but words were failing him, it wasn't like he could tell him that things were going to be okay, because things weren't okay and they weren't going to be okay. He had never lost anyone the way Wade had. The most he could do is hug his brother and he did just that. Wade fell into his brother's embrace and let the tears flow out as fast as they wanted to come.
Wade could remember back to when Zoe had told him that he was going to be a father again and that one little moment was a priceless one, a moment he wouldn't ever forget. He never thought of having more kids after everything with Aggie. Braxton had been more than enough but it was Zoe and Ariel coming into his life to show him just how much he was missing out on with having more kids. For the past 7 months his life had been on cloud nine and it was taken away from in the blink of an eye because of complications, ones he didn't even want to know. He didn't need to know everything that happened in the room, all he needed to know was that he wouldn't get to play catch with his son or get to watch him grow up. It was so wrong and not only had his heart been ripped out and stepped on, his whole world had fallen away. To make matters worse, his wife was in surgery and things could go either way. And the more time ticked past him the more it ate him up on the inside not hearing from any of the doctors or nurses on how she was doing. He felt useless because the only thing he could be doing was stay sitting in the stupid uncomfortable chairs the hospital had to offer or pacing the room waiting to hear back, he wanted to be doing so much more, waiting on news made him feel useless.
"She's my world now and I can't relax until I know what's going on," he said to the protests he could clearly see on Lavon and Jesse's faces as he moved from his brother's embrace to pace the little room that felt as if it was closing in on him. "I already lost my son, the son I won't ever get to know, I can't lose Zoe too, not after everything we've been through," he gulped falling to the floor holding his head in his hands. "You can't understand what I'm going through," he sobbed. "I can't go through this again," he whispered looking up towards the heavens.
Without saying a word Lavon and Jesse moved to sit next to him, giving him the comfort he needed to fill right now. They couldn't make it go away but they could do there part in helping Wade cope and deal with things until they were told what was going on with Zoe.