The good news is I have most of the next chapter already wrote out so I should have that up within a day or two. Remember to vote in the poll on my page if you haven't yet. Thank you to everyone that's still hanging in with this story and thank you to anyone that has just started to read this one. Enjoy!
Zoe was feeling nervous as they waited to be called in for their family therapy session. It had taken them a few days to find the right therapist for them and once they had they made an appointment right away. She laid her head on Wade's shoulder always feeling a lot calmer when she was wrapped up in his embrace. He wasted no time in wrapping an arm around her, holding her against him the best he could with the arms of the chair between them. He kissed her head, whispering that everything was going to be just fine. She smiled taking a much needed deep breath.
Being called into the office, they had taken a seat on the couch, Zoe's hand firmly in Wade's. Introduction's had been made. "What brings you to therapy today?" Dr. Oliphant asked pen and paper ready. Zoe was the one to explain what was going on and that they thought that a family session would be for the best. The doctor nodded her head, writing things down as Zoe went on to explain the situation to her. "When did this happen? How long ago?" She asked.
"Around three and half months ago now," Wade told her, squeezing Zoe's hand. She nodded her headed scribbling some notes down.
"Has it had a chance to tear your marriage apart?" She asked. "You're family?"
"Not our family but it has put a lot of strain on our marriage; we tried to keep a united front for the kids," Zoe said. "It was easier to pretend that things were good for their benefit." Another nodded from the doctor.
"We thought we could get through it without anyone else helping us and we wrong about that. We didn't know what to do and that was part of the problem," Wade added on.
"Braxton, Ariel, what do you feel about that? How did it make you feel?"
They shared a look with each other. "It was hard, we heard them fighting but we didn't know what we could say or do to make it stop. We know that sometimes people fight, its life," Ariel started to say.
"We hated it but like Ariel said we didn't know what we could really do about it. We had to wait for them to see that what they were doing was getting to us too. I know how big this whole thing is, I've been through it before when I was too young to know what was going on and I was sad because I really wanted to have a little brother to hang out with, but on the other hand, I'm happy that I still have my family. I don't want anything to happen to my dad, my mom or even my sister," he told them.
"I feel the same way," Ariel piped up. "As long as I have these three people in my life I know everything is going to be okay. I feel bad that I feel like that, that I don't have this big connection with the brother I had lost, but I didn't know him," she told everyone being honest.
"That's something you don't have to feel guilty about. You know your parents and brother better than you did your little brother. You weren't given that chance to build any kind of connection with him yet. It's normal to feel like that," Dr. Oliphant told them. "Hearing that, how does that make you feel?" She asked looking over at Wade and Zoe.
"A mix of emotions," Zoe said. "I'm happy that they love us that much but bad that they weren't given the chance the way we were to have any kind of connection with their brother. I get that it can't be helped, but I feel like there was something we could have done."
"I agree with Zoe," Wade said, taking over. "We were able to bond and create a connection right from the start because it was our child, but at the same time I feel like we could have done more," he sighed.
"But there wasn't and you can't do anything about that," the doctor told them. "This whole thing is hard to cope with for everyone, but together you can get over it. Be the family you once were and just have fun together and be carefree for a day or two. It never hurts to spend a day thinking about the what ifs when it comes to the little boy you lost, let yourselves as a family create this life you would've had, dreaming isn't a bad thing. Close your eyes and picture your family with that little boy and tell me what it is you see," she instructed them.
The sun was sitting high up in the sky as Wade and Zoe sat on a blanket in their backyard. Braxton and Ariel were running around the yard, a year and half old Boyd chasing after them. The day had been too nice of a day to waste inside after the last week they had with rainy weather. Keeping all three of the kids inside was slowly driving the parents crazy and since it was summer they couldn't even get a break during the weekdays. They each took turns when it came to work and staying home, they made sure their schedules matched up to where one could be home while the other one worked.
"This is nice," Wade commented, resting his chin on the top of his wife's head.
"It really is," she agreed, leaning back into his embrace from the spot between his legs, his arms wrapped around her.
They laughed as little Boyd, ran up to them and jump the best his little legs would let him onto his parents, Zoe catching him. She kissed his nose, calling him a silly little boy. Wade got up, taking the little boy from his wife and pretended the boy was an airplane flying around the yard chasing after Ariel and Braxton, who put their arms out and pretend to be airplanes as well. Zoe leaned back in her spot and laughed as Wade climbed up the five little steps to the slide and slid down with a laughing toddler in his arms.
"Mom come join us," Braxton yelled. Zoe shook her head but found herself getting up to join in with her family. Wade flew Boyd over Zoe's head and she reached up and started to tickle the little boy causing even more giggles. Soon enough Wade was able to escape. Zoe grabbed Ariel and started to tickle her, earning laughs from her daughter. Braxton was right there to save his sister when he started to tickle his mom, causing Zoe to fall to the ground in a fit of laughter. Boyd started to wiggle in Wade's arm wanting down. Wade set him down laughing when he ran to his brother and started to tickle him. Not wanting to be left out he ran up and started to tickle all four of them.
They laid on the ground in a heap smiles on their faces a few small laughs escaping every now and again as Boyd sat on his dad's chest bouncing and clapping his hands to do it again. Catching his breath Wade was on his feet his son in his arm as he made airplane sounds.
"Can we have the squirt guns now?" Ariel asked.
"As long as you don't spray your little brother," Zoe told them, getting to her own feet, missing the look that Braxton and Ariel shared.
A few minutes later Zoe shrieked running when she was hit with cold water in the back as the rest of her family laughed at her. "You want to play like that, huh?" She questioned rushing over to grab the hose and spray the two oldest kids along with Wade. Boyd was playing in the sand box curious about the sand more than what was going on around him.
"You're going to pay for that," Wade told her with a smirk, fighting Zoe for the hose. She fought back but Wade being stronger than she was came out with the hose and sprayed her. Laughing Zoe ran to her youngest and picked him, not caring that his sand was going to mix with the water she was drenched in. "You can't use him as a shield, Zo," Wade laughed shaking his head, quickly spraying the other two kids.
"I can do as I please, I am his mother and he's going to protect me," she stated with a smile.
"You sure about that, babe?" Wade smirked, turning the hose to a mist and spraying his wife and son. Zoe laughed watching as Boyd wanted to cry before he burst out into a fit of giggles, his little palm hitting Zoe's wet shoulder.
"You can always share the life you had imagined with each other from time to time, but you can't make it an everyday thing because that wouldn't be healthy for anyone." Zoe nodded her head on her husband's shoulder. She had never thought about letting herself imagine a life they could've had with Boyd and it had really helped her out, as long as she didn't let herself do it all the time. But this once was nice.