disclaimer: i don't own dan or phil, nor do i own any social media references, music references, and whatever else you recognize. i do own my oc, abigail elizabeth woods :)

includes: a trial, a blast from the plast, me trying to patch up two-dimensional issues in the previous chapters (you'll know what i'm talking about eventually), reasons why rosa's real bitch, and dodie lyrics (that apply twice in this chapter eheheheh extra bonus points if anyone can spot the link between the story and dodie's master song-writing ;D)

(also includes an apology for not updating — turns out i totally wasn't okay, and that depression is the real bitch.)

enjoy!

side note: i know nothing about trials and law and stuff. i'm just making stuff up, lol. i know zilch.

Chapter 38: Dreams And Ideas Should Not Be The Same Thing

The trial comes too soon for Dan's liking, and as he adjusts his tie, he soon realizes how real that velvet box was.

Hidden away in his closet, he was used to dismissing the possibility of proposing to Abi as a mere fantasy. However, as time passed, Dan becomes aware of everything that velvet box represented.

He was giving his life to someone else,
and of all people, he was giving it to Abi.

The idea didn't seem so big when he bought the ring, he now realizes. But it affects not only Abi, but everyone he knew. His parents barely know that he fancied Abi, hell, he didn't even know if Abi fancied him, and— oh God, would Phil be alone?

The thought sent chills down his spine. How much would change? How much was he willing to change?

"You've been given a second chance."

He has, hasn't he? He stares at the mirror, watching how his foot tap tap tap on the ground, and how his fingers lazily fiddle with the end of his tie.

If he has been given a second chance,
why doesn't he want to take it?

"You've been given something that not many people have been able to get."

There is too much at stake, he decides. There's too much "what if" for him to ever consider passing up another chance. He nearly lost her before, and he nearly lost everything altogether.

Who's to say it can't happen again?
Who's to say it won't?

"Hold it close and never let it go. While you still can."

He is beginning to think he isn't afraid of the trial,
but afraid of everything that comes after.

His mind is blurred with fear. Fear that he might never live to see another day. Fear that he might have to live a world that she's not in. Fear that he could get everything he ever wanted and fear that it could all be taken away in a split second.

He can't lose everything.
Not again.

"Alright?"

'Alright,' he decides, glancing at his open closet. 'I will.'

There's a knock at the door. He turns away from his mirror, and his silence is taken as an invitation. The door swings open, and Phil is standing there in an open blazer, dress pants, glasses, and a yellow tie.

"You okay?" he asks.

Dan's eyes fall on the yellow tie (leave it to Phil to make even a trial a party) and nods.

"Yeah," he says, the image of a velvet box and happy tears flashing in his mind. He smiles, and more confidently; "Of course."

Dan isn't sure when they hired a limo, but he gets in without complaint. Abi is the last to get in, her hair a bit frazzled and her glasses askew. Phil looks at her, concerned.

"Everything alright?" he asks. Dan looks down to see that her hand is holding her phone, and it's shaking.

"The stupid lawyer," Abi whispers. "You'd think that since I paid the guy for doing nothing, he would agree to return and actually...do something."

Her voice is bridging on the edge of frustration, and Phil places her hand on her clenched fists.

"Hey, it's alright." His voice is oddly calm, Dan thinks. "It's going to be okay."

"So he's not coming at all?" Dan asks. He scoffs, leaning back in his chair and adding, "What a dick."

"He is sending someone else from his attorney team, or whatever he said," Abi grumbles. "Something-something Malten, I think."

Dan blinks, a bit startled by the name.

"They were dickheads, don't get me wrong,
but no one ever...did anything about it.

"Except me."

"Remind you of any famous lawyer or something?" Abi asks; "Because if it isn't some Atticus Finch or something, I am not paying that guy a cent."

The car begins to move. Phil is telling Abi something about how he was pretty sure that wasn't how hiring lawyers worked, but Dan couldn't hear them. His stomach flipped at the name.

Malten.

He rolls the window down and shakily breathes in the cool air.

Phil is the first to notice.

"You alright, Dan?" he asks as they climb out of the limo. Dan looks at him blankly, freezing halfway out of the limo.

"What?"

"You look like you're doing some deep thinking or something," he explains. "If you're nervous or something, then that's totally fine. You just need to give a testimony or something and—"

"No, I'm fine," Dan cuts him off briskly, climbing out of the limo and closing the door. He pauses, and hesitantly admits, "It's just the name of that lawyer dude. Malten. It sounds...familiar."

They bullied me constantly before, one day,
they went too far.

"Do you think it's an old classmate?" Phil frowns, and nervously adds, "Do you reckon it's from...from a username?"

"No, definitely not," Dan says reassuringly. "It's probably just some weird coincidence. It's fine."

Phil tentatively nods, and leads Dan to the entrance of the building.

"Abi went inside to meet with the lawyer," Phil explains, opening the door for Dan. "I think she's a little pissed, if how she acted in the car didn't give it away. I honestly don't think the lawyer guy will have to do much — we have a pretty strong case."

"That's not how law works, you spork," Dan says, laughing to mask his sudden nerves.

"Still," Phil says, "I don't think this is a trial for fighting, but a trial for the confirmation of justice!"

He pumps his fist in the air playfully, and Dan rolls his eyes. They turn a corner after going through security, following the voice of Abi.

"Okay, well I trust you to do the job," they hear Abi say, followed by hums of affirmation. "Everything you need to know is in the files and— oh my God, did he at least tell you what you are doing today?"

"Of course he did."

Phil keeps walking towards Abi and the lawyer, who are coming into view, but Dan freezes in his spot upon hearing that voice.

"I don't know how I survived."

"Phil! Dan! Over here!" It was too late for Dan to bolt the other way. Abi has already seen him, and the lawyer is staring at him as well as he shakes Phil's hand.

Abi walks towards Dan and leads him to the lawyer.

"This is Mr. Neville Malten," she says, "and he is our lawyer for this case."

The lawyer stares at Dan, almost surprised.

"Daniel?" he asks. "Daniel...Daniel Howell?"

"Do you guys know each other or something?" Dan can't hear Phil speak. His heart begins to race.

Abi is hissing at Phil, saying something along the lines of how "of course he knew who Dan was" but everything begins to spin.

"Holy crap," Neville murmurs. "I—"

Dan doesn't let him finish. He bolts past Phil, Abi, and him and into the courtroom, deciding it would be better to be in there early than to not be there at all.

'this is a sick joke,
this is a sick dream;

this is sick,
i am going to be sick.'

Fifteen minutes pass before people start to flood in. The jury take their seats along the side of the room. Martyn, Cornelia, and Phil's parents rush in, briefly saying hello to Dan before taking their seats, and much to Dan's relief, his parents and Adrian show up as well.

Phil, Abi, and Neville eventually arrive at their table alongside Dan. Neville sits farthest from Dan.

"Are you okay?" Phil asks, taking a seat next to him. Dan watches Abi sit beside Neville, taking nervous glances at him every now and then. Dan sighs.

"No," he whispers shakily. "That's him."

"Who, Neville?" Phil glances at Neville, who is winking at Abi. She is trying to ignore him, murmuring under her breath, "Save your sweet-talking for the judge, Jesus Christ."

"High school," he stammers. "He was one of the people who...who…"

He trails off, not being able to finish. Phil's eyes widen, and he glares at Neville once more, who is now tapping on the desk and sneaking glances at Dan. He turns back to Dan.

"Wait, he—"

"The one with the knife," Dan finishes loudly. Phil looks at him, shocked. Neville visibly stiffens, and Abi looks at Dan, confused.

"Is everything okay?" Abi asks. "Why are we talking about knives?"

Phil motions to Neville with his eyes, a flash of guilt written on Neville's face. Abi frowns, looking at Neville, and her eyes widen when the pieces finally click.

Before she could speak, the jury's murmurs quickly silence. Noticing the change in volume, Dan, Abi, and Phil turn around and watch Rosa walk into the courtroom, followed by a woman with a briefcase and two police officers — one being Harry.

Abi's eyes widen at the familiar face, but Phil immediately looks down before he could see that damn smirk.

She's decked in an orange jumpsuit, her red hair in a pony-tail. She's wearing red lipstick that paints a smile on her face; one that makes Dan sick.

Rosa and the two police officers pass by their table. Neville straightens, as if trying to impress the woman following Rosa. Abi rolls her eyes, and as they walk by, Rosa trails her fingernail across the wooden surface of the table with a smug smile, before her wrist is yanked away by Harry.

Abi notices Phil's fist shaking, clenching in a tight ball. She gently places her hand over it, rubbing his skin with her thumb gently. His grip loosens.

The opposing side arrives at their table to the left of Dan, Phil, and Abi. Minutes of tense silence pass, before an officer announces, "All rise for the Honourable Judge Clifford."

Everyone stands up as the judge enters the room, and Dan, Phil, and Abi suck in deep breaths; this is their beginning.

The first half of the trial produces idealized results. Dan and Abi give their testimonies to the judge, and through multiple cross-examinations between himself and the other lawyer, Neville is able to prove that he is at least decent at his job.

However, when the judge calls recess, Dan knows that something bad is bound to happen.

Dan, Phil, and Neville exit the courtroom, while Abi stays behind to talk with Harry.

When the three are out of the room, Neville breaks the silence.

"Look, I know this is going to sound really bad, but—"

"Save it," Dan grumbles. "I don't want to talk about it."

"Dani—"

"My name is Dan," he snaps before Neville could say anything. "My name is Dan, and you do not know anything about me, or the shit I went through after what happened after senior year. The nerve you have to...to think that apologizing will erase the hell I went through after what happened, I...I can't—"

"Dan, calm down," Phil says quietly, looking at Neville sternly.

"I know it won't fix anything, Dan," Neville says quietly. "But I was an idiot back in high school. And I'm not saying that jail changed me or something — it was the worst two years of my life. I nearly threw my entire life away, but when I was hurting the most, I had to remind myself that it was because I almost took your life away. For that I will forever be sorry."

Dan remains quiet, feeling as if the scar on his stomach was burning through his clothes. He wraps an arm around his stomach subconsciously, and Neville seems to notice. He sighs.

"I can never erase what I left on you," he says. "I don't intend to, actually, because I don't think I can. I already wrote the damage — the most I can do now is to try and re-write our story. Just...let me help you. Let me help your family."

Dan feels Phil and Neville's hot stares on him. He looks down.

"Do not ever try and contact me again," Dan whispers.

Silence.

"Of course," Neville says, almost hurt. Phil says nothing as Neville begins to walk out, but gives Dan a look that was all too familiar to him. Dan sighs.

"Neville?" The former bully turns around upon hearing his name.

"Yes?"

Pause. "Thank you for wanting to try. It...it will never change anything, but it gives me closure. And that is one of the most important things you could ever give me. So...so thank you."

Neville flashes Dan a small smile. Dan tentatively smiles back, and Phil beams.

"Alright, well that was fun!" he says. Dan's smile falls, and he rolls his eyes at him. Neville nods, turning around to walk back into the courtroom once more.

"One more thing?"

He turns around once more. "Yeah?"

"If you ever try and hit on Abi again," Dan says, "I will sock you in the nose. And you're leaving without a paycheck."

"I don't think that's how it wor—"

"Noted." Neville cuts Phil off with a small, all-knowing twinkle in his eyes, and Dan can't help but blush, leading them back inside the room.

When recess is called, Abi decides to go up to Harry.

"Hi," she says softly, catching his attention. He looks up from his paper and flashes a small smile.

"Hey," Harry replies. He chuckles. "That was one tough testimony you gave."

Abi shrugs with a sly grin. "In all honesty, my argument was…very emotionally-driven."

Harry laughs quietly. "How are you holding up?"

"Alright, I think," Abi says. "The lawyer we hired turned out to be a...blast from the past for Dan, Phil is really anxious for his testimony, and there's still a possibility that this will all fail somehow, but—"

"But there is a possibility that this will go exactly as planned," Harry finishes for her. "You guys are going to get what you deserve, I promise. After everything you've went through, you can at least be at peace knowing that Rosa will never be in your lives again, no matter what her sentence is."

"Thank you, Harry." She holds his hands gently and smiles. "And thank you for agreeing to speak at the trial today. I really appreciate it."

"Of course," he says reassuringly. "You know I am always here for you."

"I appreciate it," Abi says. Harry nods, and a beat of silence passes before Harry breaks it.

"I didn't mean about today," Harry blurts out. Abi looks at him, confused, and Harry corrects himself; "I mean...when I asked how you were doing, I meant...I meant how you're feeling. Not about the trial but...but like—"

"How do I feel about being at a trial," Abi finishes off for him. Harry meekly nods. She leans against the edge of the table and crosses her arms.

"It feels weird," Abi admits, "knowing that never in my life has a judge dictated my success, but rather the people I am up against. The worst things in my life happened in front of a judge and now...and now I feel like I am finally going to win in terms of justice. Part of me is thankful, but…"

She trails off when she sees Dan, Phil, and Neville walk back into the room. She sighs.

"But part of me knows that in some ways, we've already lost," Abi says, staring at Phil, who was fiddling with his thumbs nervously.

"This is a step forward." Harry puts a hand on her shoulder and squeezes it softly. "There will always be sacrifices that you need to take in order to move forward, and this is only one of them. You'll get through this, just like you have been able to get through everything you've ever faced thus far. This is only going to help you, I promise.

Abi smiles. "Thank you, Harry. I...I love you a lot."

"I love you too," Harry says, ruffling her hair. She giggles, and retreats back to her seat and sits down, a new-found sense of confidence blossoming in her.

The sound of the gavel echoes in the room.

"Order in the court!"

Abi glares at Rosa, who happens to be staring back. She smirks.

Round 2.

The trial seems to go on forever, with counter-argument after counter-argument, testimony after testimony, and Phil feels as if his ears were going to bleed if he ever heard the word "objection!" coming out of Rosa's stupid lawyer's mouth ever again.

But eventually, his time arrives, and he takes a deep breath when he hears Neville announce, "I hereby invite Philip Lester to the stand."

Phil slowly walks up, feeling the stares of everyone in the room drill into his chest. He stands in his small booth besides the judge, a hand to his heart. His eyes lock with Rosa's dark ones, and her smile nearly sets him off completely.

"Mr. Lester?" the judge asks. "Are you alright?"

"O-Of course, Your Honour," Phil says. He straightens up and declares loudly, "I solemnly affirm that the evidence to be given by me shall be the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth."

The judge nods, before looking at Neville. "Proceed."

"Mr. Lester, please describe your relationship with Ms. Rosalina Sals to the jury," Neville states. Phil looks at the jury, and while knowing they are patiently waiting his response, he feels as if their stares were burning into him. He then looks at his family, and then at Abi and Dan.

"You're okay," Dan mouths. Phil shakily smiles, and leans closer into the mic.

"I-I met Rosa at a moment of what felt like desperation," Phil begins. "My friends were becoming closer, my job felt less satisfying, and my fear of everyone moving forward started to become a reality, as I was grounded in the same spot as the same person."

He stares at Rosa. "And then I met her."

Rosa's cold stare feels as if it is going straight through him, and for a split second, Phil considers running off in a blur of panic.

Then he locks eyes with Abi, who nods for him to continue. He takes a deep breath.

"She treated me unlike anyone has ever treated me before. She was...she was undeniably sweet, and she, at one point, I believe, cared about me."

He sighs. "But then I realized that she wasn't after me."

He is shaking, his heart racing and his mouth threatening to leak words he didn't want to spill.

"I was so blinded by the possibility that someone could love me more; that someone could love me better." Phil's fist tightens. "And all she ever did was manipulate me. She used my vulnerability to get what she wanted and I was okay with that. When she was hurting me, she managed to convince me that I should be so grateful that it was me. And even without her influence, I was relieved that it was me suffering."

Phil can hear his mum sobbing and Abi's small intakes of breath. He bites his lip.

"But it came to a breaking point when she began to hurt my family. Not only did she use me, but she wanted to use me to hurt more the people I love. Whether that be ending one of them, or...or trapping the heart of another."

He faces Rosa, his fists trembling. Tears begin to fall.

"Rosaline Sals, I have never been more ashamed in my entire life to say that I was in love. And...and as unfortunate as it is, what happens today doesn't change the fact that I know you. I know that you will walk out of here — your destiny in someone else's hands — and the thought that you possibly ruined my chance at loving someone ever again…," He shakes his head, almost frustrated, "that thought will never cross your mind."

The room falls silent. He locks eyes with Rosa, and his words come out through broken sobs.

"So Rosaline Sals, I...I hope you burn in hell."

(Rosa's laugh is all he hears.)

It takes thirty minutes for the jury to decide, and Dan notices that Phil remains silent as his family surrounds him, teary-eyed.

"We love you, Philip," his mum sobs. He says nothing, but pulls her closer.

After speaking with his own family, Dan starts walking towards Abi, who is watching as Neville talk with Harry.

"You okay?" he asks softly. She jumps at the sudden presence, but relaxes upon seeing Dan. She pushes up her glasses.

"Fine," she sighs. "I just want this to be over."

"Me too," Dan says. He looks down shyly before asking, "Are you still okay with dinner?"

Abi giggles. "A bit of an inappropriate time to reaffirm a date, don't you think?"

Happy tears.
A velvet box.
The promise of forever.

"I just want to give you an escape," he whispers, pulling Abi closer to him. "An escape from it all."

She blinks, their faces inches apart. If she leaned in a little closer...if she just—

"Ladies and gentlemen, the jury has reached a verdict."

Dan and Abi turn around, and they suddenly notice that the seats the jury had taken were filled in once more. They return to their seats wordlessly.

The room falls silent as the judge shuffles papers. He takes a deep breath and finally gives out his statement.

"Ms. Sals, you are hereby sentenced to ten years in prison for the persistent harassment of Daniel Howell, Abigail Elizabeth Woods, and Philip Lester; and for attempted murder, and to two years' probation afterwards, on condition that you complete a court-approved rehabilitation course after you serve your time in prison, and fulfill the terms of a permanent restraining order."

Abi grabs Dan and Phil's hands, her eyes wet with tears. Neville breaks into a big smile, and for the first time, Rosa remains silent.

"Case closed," the judge says. "Please take Ms. Sals to her cell."

As Harry and the other officer take Rosaline by the hands, she manages to lunge at Dan, Phil, and Abi once more when she passes by them, despite the attempts the officers make to restrain her.

"You'll never be happy, Phil! Do you know why?!" She glares at him manically, and everything around Phil seemingly freezes. "Because you're always going to come last."

Phil stares at her, and Rosa almost takes it as fear.

She's wrong.

"Goodbye, Rosa," he grits out, "fuck you."

And as she leaves, he finally breaks down, slumping back in his seat and sobbing. Dan and Abi begin to cry as well, and they surround him, holding him close.

"It's over, isn't it?" Abi whispers. Dan looks at Abi with a teary smile.

A dream flashes in his eyes;
a dream of a new life.

"I think it's the beginning," he whispers. "Life's about to get really good."

And he smiles.

"I promise."

reviews are totally rad, dude :)