So... Uh... I suppose I owe everyone an apology for disappearing. I had a lot of stuff going on, both IRL and on the internet. This included an exam period during which I nearly jumped off a bridge. But that's besides the point. Here's a new chapter I have yet to proofread. One of these days I'll reformat this whole thing and also upload it to AO3 (better site), just not now. Just making this exhausted me. Cheers and thanks for the reviews~
The atmosphere on that day could be accurately described as a 'silence before the storm'. Obito was sat on a tree branch, resting before what would most likely be an upcoming battle. Konoha was mobilizing its forces - at least a small group - while Kabuto had just gotten the Zetsus and the resurrected Akatsuki-members ready. However, he wished he could pay attention to the political maneuvers he should've. His last trip to Tsukuyomi had taken a massive toll on him, misplaced images flowing freely in his head and making him question the accuracy of his memory overall.
Mostly, he wondered what Deidara had to do with any of this. He was intelligent enough to not lie to himself and admit that there was something weird going on with that man from Iwagakure. It wasn't even the first time Obito had felt like this about him; he saw his first trainings with Sasori, some bits of their partnership, his behavioral patterns. He knew his background as well as his surprisingly young age. Something was off about him. What the Uchiha knew least of all where to put were his apparent sexual fantasies regarding Deidara. It was as if he'd always been thinking about doing certain things to him, ever since they've started being partners, because he had a sense of deja-vu about the images in his head. Still, he didn't remember imagining them.
Sensing a source of chakra approaching him, he reemerged from his thoughts and opened his eyes. It was Kabuto, and having to deal with him right now brought him to a slight state of irritation. It had to be done, nonetheless.
"We ought to go."
Obito hopped down from his tree, following his ally without saying anything. They arrived to the meetup location shortly, all their summoned fighting entities back from a previous series of battles. Familiar faces. Except the black sclera and the cracks on their skin, signifying their status as the living dead.
It would've been a lie to say that Obito didn't feel any remorse when he saw them. Naturally, they were oblivious to the fact that he had essentially caused them to die, not knowing his real identity. The deceased members of his organization acted as if they'd been alive the whole time; they bickered, chatted and resorted to their usual hobbies. In fact, Deidara and Sasori were currently arguing about some utterly trivial topic. It filled the Uchiha with a bitter nostalgia, knowing that their lifespan would only be prolonged by a few hours. It made him a little confused to look at his former partner after what's been going on in his fantasies, but in the end, it was an interesting change to see him again.
"...And they replaced you with some kind of dumbass named Tobi" he overheard Deidara saying.
Obito decided to step closer, thinking of the amusement he would get out of the blonde noticing that the one he's been badmouthing was standing directly next to him. When the other shot a quick and confused glance in his direction, he suddenly remembered that his mask and outfit had been replaced and perhaps it wasn't so easy to recognize him. Still, he presumed Deidara had thought of the possibility, considering how he had furrowed his brows.
The two artists resumed their conversation. They still had a few hours before the next confrontation with Konoha, so everyone seemed to take their sweet time with the preparations. Kabuto had said it earlier on: Using the zombies' personality is a massively positive factor in battle, but we have to counter their personal quirks with patience instead of expecting them to just obey us. Obito sat on a rock. He wasn't planning to talk to any of the revived members; that would've meant explaining that he was indeed Tobi, as well as the 180 degree turn his personality had taken. Too long of a discourse, and it would make them question the ends of the battle.
He wasn't expecting Deidara to walk up to him, out of all people. Well, great. That would make everything even more complicated.
"You look awfully familiar, un."
No response.
"Are you Kabuto's subordinate?"
After reflecting a little, Obito realized that nothing too bad could happen.
"His ally" he stated, turning the black-and-white mask towards Deidara, who started looking even more confused. Maybe the similar design reminded him. Or… it could've been the fact that when you're the only one in the Akatsuki-circles walking around with a mask, it ironically makes you identifiable.
"Wait a second… Tobi?"
"Please stop before you even start demanding explanations." Obito sighed.
"So you've grown up mentally, huh?" was Deidara's reaction.
"War takes its toll on people." Something livened up inside the Uchiha; the same spontaneity and thirst for amusement that prompted him to construct the Tobi-character. These were only a few hours which didn't matter anything; he'd play the game then. He wouldn't explain a thing.
"You're right; I like fighting, but I hate war" the blonde continued, trying to initiate a casual conversation "It's hard to get food or any other commodity. Your family gets killed, you lose your loved ones. There's no one there to help you, un."
He turned towards the other man who seemed to be a little lost in his thoughts.
"Have you ever lost a loved one, Kabuto's Ally?"
Obito shot a suspecting glance at him - which he couldn't see due to the mask.
"What if I have?"
"I've tried to make some guesses, you see, un." he smiled. "Since you're not Kabuto's subordinate, that must mean you're as powerful as him. Yet, the two of you have an alliance, despite what a demanding, untrustworthy, insufferable prick Kabuto is. There must be some strong motivation in you in order to team up with him. Like the death of a loved one, un."
Obito's pulse fastened as the chat took an unexpected turn. Firstly, he had to remind himself sometimes that Deidara had '9/10 intelligence' written on his info card. Then again, it was hard to believe he'd be able to come to such a precise conclusion about someone he barely knew a thing about.
"I'd rather call it desperation" the dark-haired nin said.
"Well, I wouldn't know. After all, I don't really remember my family, nor did I have any significant bonds. Last time I tried to give someone advice on this, they made it clear that it was a sensitive topic to them… In a pretty violent manner."
Where had the Uchiha heard that before? He felt like he was going crazy for a second. He just had another rush of memories, similar to the one that overcame him when he spoke to Kabuto. Deidara continued.
"Such a nasty world we live in, un. But it won't always be like this, will it? Not when the plan is completed."
"You know about the plan?" Obito asked in shock. The blonde shifted a little, leaning against the wall of rock with his back.
"Oh, maybe."
"I had no idea Kabuto went around telling people. I need to reprimand him for this."
"Don't worry, he wasn't the one who told me." The Iwa nin sat down too.
The older of the two started to make a reconstruction in his head. Ever since he woke up from his last meditation, his memories were messed up, as if he had just forgotten about a period of his life; everything he didn't understand afterwards seemed like a clue pointing at past events. It was all somehow connected to Deidara, and the Uchiha - not being a halfwit himself - came to the conclusion that he had met him during some times he couldn't remember. Said man interrupted his train of thought a moment later.
"Why do you wear a mask,... Tobi?"
"Why do people wear masks, usually?" he responded in an ironical tone "I don't want to be recognized."
"There are things you can't hide with that, un."
"For example?"
"Your chakra, your techniques, your mannerisms."
Obito was getting uncomfortable with the exchange. He felt an incredible superiority in knowledge on Deidara's part and he became childish and defensive in response. How much older was he? Ten years? Still, he was being mocked by a teenager; a violence-crazed maniac, moreover.
"Maybe more people know you than you think, Kabuto's Ally. Un." Deidara added.
In the meanwhile, Kabuto was calling out for the fighters, so the Iwa nin left, giving the other man a pat on the shoulder as he stood up. It was a natural and fearless gesture, one for which the Uchiha would've punched anyone else into the ground for disrespecting him. Not now, though.
He was left speechless, his hands shaking and his shoulder burning where it had been touched. How would he not know that sensation? It was a hand that had held onto his nape during kisses, stroked his skin, reached out to him. He was hopelessly, desperately in love with the person who had just departed to a battle where he would most likely die. His headache worsened.
-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-
Deidara took a long sigh as he quietly traveled on his clay bird, hair flowing freely in the wind. He'd never been a fan of exaggerated sentimental displays; the war had taught him to keep his cool even when he felt like his life was collapsing in on itself. It was the same as the first time Sasori had died: the news left him with a mind numb from the loss, unable to think properly. His only outward reaction was silence, but inside, it was as if a part of his life had been cut away. It would've been a stretch to say he had loved Sasori; the Iwa nin found his artistic ideals outright ridiculous and his personality unbearable. But the Akatsuki puppetmaster was smart, capable, undenibly a great artist, and most of all, Deidara was used to him.
The blonde took a glance at Sasori's reincarnation, moving with lengthy jumps a few meters below him. As much as it had hurt to lose him and as much as a delight it was to talk to him again, Deidara forced himself to be apathetic on the outside.
Which made him question whether Obito had been faking his reactions or had really lost his memories. The moment he reappeared in the human world - when Kabuto inserted his soul back into his reincarnated body - his mind was hazy too, but it didn't take him too long to put the bigger picture together in his head. Not only did he remember everything that had happened in Tsukuyomi in detail, but he also found out about a sensation he was starting to be familiar with; his soul being yanked back and forth between dimensions. It was hard to put it into words. To say the least, it was unpleasant. The last thing the blonde remembered from Obito's inner world was noticing how his own body was dematerializing, then his vision blurring and his entire being getting suctioned into what he presumed to be some kind of dimensional breach.
It was the same thing he had felt before appearing in Tsukuyomi, he reckoned. The second time, however, he was able to build up some resistance not to let himself painfully fall apart in the transition. It was almost like Deidara had gained some control over his own spirit. The same thing probably didn't apply to that damn Uchiha, considering that he couldn't even move in and out of his own spiritual haven without erasing his memories. The artist sighed. And he was the one who wanted to replace the entire world with a new one!
Speaking of which, he had almost come to terms with the fact that his relationship with Obito was destined to fail. It was more convenient for everyone if Deidara just kept it inside; after all, he was the only one who had any recognition of their affair. It was as if it didn't happen at all. He felt bitter about it, sure. But this was real life, not some fantasy dimension. He had to move on.
So he shrugged. He made a motivational remark to Sasori, and when they arrived, he threw himself right into the battle.
-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-
Obito ran at full speed. Occasionally, he executed a kamui to make his steps faster. He knew he was about to do something foolish, interrupting an important tactical confrontation, but the issue was having too much of an emotional impact on him. According to his calculations, it would compromise his decision-making ability if he didn't sort out his complications regarding Deidara. Or, putting it more simply, he just couldn't proceed with the plans in his current state.
He was already breathing hard and overexerting his chakra, and yet he hadn't found the bomber. If only he had paid more attention to Kabuto's rambling about the locations… Suddenly, he heard a loud rumble at an estimated few kilometers from him. Obito's expression lit up. He quickly hopped on top of a tree with a few jumps to see the scenery clearly. His suspicion was confirmed as another bomb went off in nearly the same place.
-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-
"Wha-" Deidara landed on a stone block with a surprised gasp.
He quickly collected himself, standing up and brushing the dust off his clothes. He looked around, puzzled. The place was apparently made of the same, cubic pieces of rock.
"What the hell?" he mumbled under his breath. That's when he noticed Obito, sitting not too far from him. He had taken off his mask and was glaring at Deidara.
"Don't worry, these are just a few seconds of your actual life."
The Iwa nin smirked.
"So you've finally stopped playing games, huh?" he said, stepping closer to the older man.
"I honestly didn't remember until now" Obito stated in a neutral voice, almost pointing at a lack of interest, but not quite.
"Must've meant a lot to you then, un."
Deidara was now standing directly in front of him, looking down upon him with anger and bit of cruelty, even. He was about to burst. No one had the right to treat him like that, messing with his emotions and soul, not even letting him die peacefully.
"I've brought you here because it means a lot to me."
Obito was punched in the face. It was much more serious than last time, full of force and frustration, and it sent him falling on his side. He rubbed his face - Deidara even hit him on the injured side - and looked away, not sure whether he could say something appropriate or not. Then he stood up and inched closer to the other who got paralyzed by surprise. The Uchiha kissed him tamely, as if it was an act of forgiveness.
Strangely enough, the artist didn't resist. Rather, it looked like he had given up and just didn't care anymore. Obito pulled away and started talking.
"I understand your anger, but just think! There's hope for everyone. We'll both live happily, everyone will! There's so little to do left-"
"You know, Obito" Deidara interrupted him, stepping farther "Your personality has one basic defect."
The dark-haired man gave him a puzzled look as he paced around, about to continue his monologue.
"I've been thinking about this for some time. You dissociate from reality. One bad thing happens to you, you put your entire life on the line to undo it. You expect perfection from everything and everyone and cling to delusions when the world doesn't go out of its way to appease you."
"There's nothing wrong with wanting to create perfection when there's a realistic chance in succeeding!" Obito yelled angrily.
"Oh? Realistic? Having the entire world live under a genjutsu? I'm sure no one is going to oppose that, un." the younger man laughed bitterly "Yeah, they'll be down for it! What a lovely idea!"
Before the ex-Konoha nin could rebut, Deidara spoke again.
"This is why you'll never understand my art, un. You are unable to appreciate the present, the fleeting moment you live in. You constantly cling to the past, that's why you summoned me in Tsukuyomi."
"I… didn't…"
"Oh yes, you did. You just don't have enough control over your powers and your mind not to use forbidden techniques impulsively or to remember doing so, for that matter."
Deidara was suddenly surrounded by chakra, a look of forceful concentration on his face. Obito was still speechless, concluding that the artist was probably right about everything.
"I can only hope you'll realize one day, un." And with that, his body started to decompose into small particles.
"Wait!" the raven stretched out his hand to grab ahold of the other man's arm, cloak, hair, anything. It was useless, his body was already semi-transparent. All that was left of the Iwa nin disappeared inside a vortex resembling kamui, which closed itself a moment later, leaving Obito alone in Tsukuyomi.
-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-
Deidara quickly regained consciousness. He stood up from the ground and quickly analyzed his surroundings.
"Where was I at?" he scratched his head.
"Oh, right. Here I come, Uchiha Sasuke, un!"
With that, he ran off into the woods. The sky had started to turn dark and the full moon had never looked so white and luminous.