Chapter 22: If I Had A Heart
Morgan was frozen in fear. It had only been a week, and her bruises had gotten even darker. She couldn't even walk because they had to do surgery on her leg to realign her tibia for proper healing so she wasn't allowed to wear a boot yet. She had a big, removeable cast where they wrapped gauze around her entire leg, then placed two big pieces of a plaster casing over top, to give her leg support and protection from movement or hitting it on everything, and a final thick layer of ace bandages to keep it all together. It was annoyingly heavy and bulky. The unfortunate reasoning for this style of cast was because the doctors needed to be able to remove it to check on the surgical wound and later remove the stitches. She hated every minute of wearing it, but she refused to talk about it.
The lump in her throat seemed like it was getting bigger as she did her best to get dressed, using her ability to hold herself up without her leg putting pressure on the ground. Morgan had already taken a shower, blowdried her hair, but she didn't dare touch her makeup aside from putting some mascara on only her top lashes, making sure that she wouldn't look like a mess later if she cried. Though, she was going to do her best to make sure no one saw her cry. She looked tortured enough after that night. She had the injuries to prove it. After her shower she had put on an oversized t-shirt and a pair of loose soccer shorts before her dad came in and helped her take the saran wrap off her leg that was covering her stitches to keep the water away and put her cast back on, using a fresh roll of gauze. Once her dad left, Morgan used her power to stand up, take off her clothes, and put on the dress that her dad picked up for her a few days before. He went to the stores that he knew her size and made sure it would be comfortable and brought it home for her. Even a new pair of tights since it was already chilly outside from the November air. Morgan thought it was funny because her dad had to help her put the tights on just that one section of her leg under the cast, but it would be even easier to take them off later because they were the ballet kind of tights that have the whole on the bottom of the foot. So all she had to do was pull them over her toes, pull it up through the cast, then stretch it over the cast to take it off.
She used her power to levitate herself over to her mirror. Her hair was parted near the middle, perfectly straight from the hair dryer, and flowed past her shoulders as it always did. Her face was a bit paler than it had been when she first got here. Her freckles were so prominent now that she wasn't wearing the amount of makeup that she usually wore because of cheerleading. She was wearing a thick, knit black sweater dress with a turtleneck to cover the bruises on her neck from the demon trying to choke her. Though it didn't cover all of them. The ones close to her jaw were still slightly visible. She still had bruising on her face, on her cheeks, her right eye was black, she had a small hematoma in her right eye, her lip was split. There was even more bruising all over her body, but the tights and the dress hid them. She grabbed her coat and slid it on. She put a dark purple fuzzy sock on over her cast to keep her toes warm and put the matching fuzzy sock on her left foot before sliding on her black combat boot. She continued levitating herself to the main room where her dad was before he got up. She was dressed in a black suit, ready to go with her. She followed him to the car.
"Is the wheelchair in there?" She asked quietly, her voice raspy from lack of use. Her dad seemed caught off guard by the sound of her voice.
"Yeah, it's in the trunk," He told her as she opened the car door to the passenger seat, carefully sitting herself down on the car seat. Her nose dripped a small amount of blood when she let go of using her ability. She wiped it on a tissue from the pack she slipped into her coat. The engine started and they pulled out of the garage, making their way to the church.
"Remind me why I'm going to this?" she asked, her voice cracking again.
"Because his parents want you there. According to them you meant a lot to him and honestly I think they feel connected to him when you're around because they think he died saving you so just go, and if it's too much we can leave, okay?" Dean told her, and she sighed.
"Okay," she whispered, watching the landscape roll past the window until they made it to the church. There were people walking in already. She just sat in the car, watching them all walking in. People were staring at the car, probably because she was notorious at Oak Hills for being driven around in the in perfect condition 1967 Chevy Impala, which means wherever that car was, she might be. Dean opened the door on her side and wheeled up the wheelchair. She didn't want to look so weak and feeble, but she had to. The doctors preferred, based on circulation, that she be in a wheelchair until the stitches closed and she was in the boot cast, which would start with crutches, then the last two weeks of eight she could just walk around freely with the condition of wearing the boot.
"You ready?" Her father asked, holding out his hand to help her. She shook her head, but grabbed his hand anyway. He lifted her from under her shoulders, but she used her ability to hold her weight since the way he would've lifted her would've irritated her still broken rib. Once she was in the wheelchair, Dean closed the car door and started wheeling her over to the church. They had to take the ramp up to the entrance. The moment she entered the church, all eyes were on her. She didn't dare show any emotion as every single one of her classmates that were in attendance began whispering. She was wheeled past rows and rows of people she knew, until she wheeled past a few rows of Jonah's family and close family friends, until the family greeted her up at the front of the pews. Right in front of his body, the open casket where she could see the boy that she stabbed.
"Thank you for coming, Morgan," Jonah's stepmom greeted her. "He would've wanted you to be here." She told her quietly. Morgan nodded until her dad put her at the end of the first pew where they left an open space for handicaps. Dean sat next to her at the end of the pew as more people came in and the service began. Her head started to hurt as she was hearing a mess of thoughts from everyone in the room. That was a lot of people. Her nose started bleeding, from listening in on all of those thoughts at once. She shut them out, and cleaned her nose with her tissue.
It was a long service about how Jonah was somehow an integral part in the community. How he was some great football player, student, and classmate. How his murder was a tragedy. People kept bringing up Morgan, about how he saved her life and how they were so close. Morgan could bet that a lot of people in this room wished she had died instead of him. Infact, she knew that. It was one of the many thoughts that were screaming inside her skull until she shut them all out. When it came time for everyone to pay their respects, Morgan stayed where she was while Jonah's family went up by the casket, everyone passing by them. No one came up to Morgan, moreso because she just kept looking at the floor. Instead of looking at the people and how some of the kids in the crowd were crying over her dead boyfriend even though they didn't even know him that well, she focused on not crying, on holding it together. But when she looked up and saw the photo next to his casket, Morgan could feel her eyes welling up. Her vision was blurring. They decided to pick the photo of him at Homecoming. It was a candid of Jonah smiling, looking at something. Morgan was in the picture, pinning his boutonniere on his jacket. She didn't even blink, the tears started falling. Once everyone was sitting back down, Jonah's step mother came to collect her. Kandi wheeled her to front and center of the church, just in front of the platform that Jonah's casket and the altar were on. Morgan wiped her eyes and took a deep breath.
"Sorry, I… uh… have never really given a speech, for anything. I had almost made a little eulogy for my mom, who actually died earlier this year, right before I moved here…" Morgan could feel all the emotions welling up inside her. She looked to Dean and he nodded, assuring her that she would be okay. "I guess everyone wants to know what happened to him, since I was there when it happened. What you all should know, it that he did save me. He saved me that night and you know what? He saved me when I first moved here. I had been living here in Kansas maybe a month when my dad took me to the Fourth of July festival. He ran into me on the fairgrounds. He had recognized me from all the times I was running errands around town with my dad and my uncle. Apparently everyone knows them as the marines. It was funny because we weren't even talking more than two minutes and he offered to buy me the best milkshakes in town, asking me what my favorite flavor was. He didn't even know my name yet.
"Jonah was my first friend here. Kind of my first friend in a long time actually. I had a hard time transitioning to attending Oak Hills, and he went out of his way to make me feel welcome. He even introduced me to my other friends here. Jonah was a really good kid. Great Friend. He once outright asked me if I was acclimating okay. He noticed that I wasn't talking about certain things. Most people don't know that I moved here after my mom died and what my life was like before living here. And when I didn't want to talk about it, he backed off. He knew I'd talk about it in my own time and he was okay with that. He just wanted to be there for me. I think we all knew that. Jonah just wanted to be there for everyone, help everyone, and he did. Right until the very end…" Morgan took a deep breath. People were crying, but Jonah's parents were smiling at her through their sad eyes. They were proud of their son. Even though he was gone.
"I think if he was with us, or at least watching his funeral from the great beyond, he would tell us to stop being sad, that we need to smile and love each other and hold our relationships and happy memories close, because we don't know when they're going to be taken away from us. Or in Jonah's case, given up because he sacrificed himself to protect me. Just like he always tried to help and protect everyone else. I guess that's all I have to say aside from, he cared about all of us, and I hope you all cherish his memory." Morgan stopped. Her dad got up from his seat and wheeled her back to where she was before. There was some singing, but she stayed silent. Then it was over. Her dad wheeled her back to the car, helped her in, and they left. She didn't stick around. She didn't even want to go to the wake at the Maifeld's house. She just wanted to go home.