So it goes with saying that only things I own with any connection to MARVEL I bought on Ebay or Etsy. MARVEL COMICS & MARVEL CINEMATIC UNIVERSE are their own creatures and I have nothing to do with either of them aside from the fact I enjoy reading or watching them, and am grateful for the ability to play in their world. I claim nothing, and I receive nothing for this, expect the pleasure of putting something out into the world.
You can also find this story on ARCHIVE OF OUR OWN under the same title and pen name along with a place to post suggestions.
Don't forget to check out the Photobucket album listed on my profile page too. (My apologies. I didn't realize FF removed the links. I have corrected the problem in what way I can, so for those who like the visual additions, feel free to check them out.)
DAY THREE
CHAPTER SEVENTY EIGHT
THURSDAY, MAY 3RD 2012
1314 HOURS
OHIO STATE REFORMATORY
MANSFIELD OHIO, USA
CLINT
She's still again. When he said he would let her say goodbye my teeth hurt I was so angry. I want the best, the nicest things for Nora, but I didn't want that. I wanted him to be mean right now.
It's a small part of me, but being selfish is a part of every human, part of more than just humans. My selfishness wants him to treat her badly, to not care about her feelings, and remind her that he is the bad guy in this situation. But the rest of me wants the exact opposite because this woman has become my little sister, and who the hell wishes that on their sister?
She tensed with a small sniff, but that was the closest thing to resistance she offered him as he pressed a kiss to her forehead before dragging his fingers over the metal on her ankle, the cuff and chain crumbling behind them.
When he repeats the motion on me it stings like someone pressed dry ice there, the cold sensation lingering uncomfortably even though the metal fell away a fraction of a second later. By the time he reached the door and closed it from the other side, both of our chains are nothing but oval piles of metal shards on the floor.
She just stays like that, even as I stand on stiff legs under me and rub the warmth back into my wrists. Even when I bend those stiff legs again, twelve feet from when I straightened them, and try to see her face hidden from me by the hair it took her almost three years to grow, "Nora?"
THURSDAY, MAY 3RD 2012
1315 HOURS
OHIO STATE REFORMATORY
MANSFIELD OHIO, USA
NORA
I'm calm, I'm cool and collected. I'm in control, everything is going to be alright. I'm calm, I'm cool and collected. I'm in control, everything is going to be alright. I'm calm, I'm cool and c... "Nora?" ...cracked. "Shut up." The whisper does nothing to lessen the intensity.
My logic was childish, was stupid and I knew it even as I grabbed it and held it so tightly it hurt. I wouldn't say goodbye, I would keep this moment forever as long as I didn't take my gift. I don't even remember being I child, but I don't think I was ever desperate enough to let myself think that would work before. Then he had to say my damn name, and all the frustration I'd been holding behind the door finally shouldered through. "You goddamned idiot, just shut up. Why?! WHY?!"
THURSDAY, MAY 3RD 2012
1315 HOURS
OHIO STATE REFORMATORY
MANSFIELD OHIO, USA
CLINT
The reaction was stronger than I was prepared for, but that just made me happy. It sounds mean, but I would rather have her angry and on the verge of tears, because at least that means she is feeling things instead of shutting everything down.
Some of that happiness diminishes behind a wave of concern though when she cuts off my "because you're a prin..." with a snarled word that is very clearly not english. "NEI!" Before reverting back to english and a command "Don't ever call me that again!"
My first assumption is that it's German, but my thoughts correct themselves even before that thought finishes. I'm not good at German but I still know that their no is 'nein'.
My next thoughts are hope and fear. There have been times Nora showed herself to be multilingual, though she doesn't remember doing it. The first time was after she woke up. Before they sedated her and got that guy's broken arm out of her grasp, she screamed in German and Russian, though when we tested her for what languages she 'remembered' she could only understand and speak English.
There were a few other times too. Polish, Serbian, Hebrew, Czech, and pretty much every major language of the people the Nazi's hated. Also what they figured was a dialect of Norwegian. They were always spoken in the throws of nightmares. She said a lot of things in those broken sentences, and while the German and Russian were usually pleas for mercy, the rest of the languages were almost exclusively her asking for forgiveness or saying 'I'm sorry'.
Nora's nightmares were memories, those memories made her speak in tongues. Nora is remembering her memories, and retaining them now even after she wakes up. I have to assume that the 'nei' means she is getting even closer to really remembering. I hope like hell I'm right on that, and scared as shit at the same time.
Her remembering means she might realize how devious or wicked this guy is, and turn against him. Which is good, and I want that, but only if she has a chance at beating him and getting away. I don't see him as the kind to take her rebellion lightly so ...God what the hell is wrong with me... I need to make sure she doesn't.
THURSDAY, MAY 3RD 2012
1316 HOURS
OHIO STATE REFORMATORY
MANSFIELD OHIO, USA
NORA
"Okay, I won't..." I can see the habit almost slipping that word in, and part of me wants to smirk at that. " But what happened?" However his sentence murders that urge just like I...
His fingers catch my chin after the first inch it drops down. "Hey, no, you had to, you did good." There's unspoken knowledge in that sentence, the knowledge of a name. "You knew it was him?"
His smile is more of a tight line and he nods. "Yeah, the timing was way too convenient. Did that Scottish bastard hurt you?" This time it's my turn to nod, but for his next question I shake my head the opposite way. "Did he do that to your hands?"
THURSDAY, MAY 3RD 2012
1317 HOURS
OHIO STATE REFORMATORY
MANSFIELD OHIO, USA
CLINT
The 'no' shake of her head confuses me, as much as if not more than the way she looks at those damn lines and smiles. "I..." Her sentence trails of with a soft chuckle before she turns the scars to me almost proud. "...I bought a Christmas miracle."
Okay, that is vaguely confusingly terrifying, the terrifying part because of the roots of suspicion forcing their way deeper into my thoughts. "Nora, you need explain that because I don't understand." And please don't let me be right.
"I cried a plant." Is the answer I get, and it makes no sense, but it wasn't supposed to. I can tell, even as she continues, that this is really just her attempt at putting time between her anxiety and my answer. "It was so pretty. I wish you could have seen it, I'll sho..."
THURSDAY, MAY 3RD 2012
1317 HOURS
OHIO STATE REFORMATORY
MANSFIELD OHIO, USA
NORA
"Nora, why did you cut up your hands?" He knows, he knew, of course he knew. And of course he is mad. I don't even need to tell him it was with his knife. That would only make him angrier with me. Everything at this point is just going to make him upset, because I didn't listen and left. Even my meek reply doesn't make him feel any better."Nat didn't say you could die okay, I had to."
"Dammit Nora." The disappointment makes him close his eyes with the sharpness of a wince, and tilt his head as if he can shake away the sour taste my actions leave in his mouth. Then he gives up that brief attempt and just lets the bitter taste of frustration fill him "Why would you...?!"
"YOU HAVE CHILDREN!" I woke up with the the frightening intensity from a nightmare, then that intensity turned to joy at seeing him alive, before it ricocheted right back to frightened at the sound of Loki's voice. Loki's voice which only ended up turning that intensity to heartbreak with his verdict 'Say goodbye'. "YOU THINK YOU CAN JUST TELL ME THAT AND EXPECT ME TO..." It was only after that when my emotions started to let go of some of their intensity. That was an illusion though because it only made room for a different kind. "WHAT RIGHT DO YOU HAVE TO BE MAD AT ME, IF I HADN'T KILLED..."
THURSDAY, MAY 3RD 2012
1318 HOURS
OHIO STATE REFORMATORY
MANSFIELD OHIO, USA
CLINT
That's about as far as her words get before they turn to sounds of sobs and angry grunts as I force her into a bear hug, choking back the sound each time her half successful struggles brush against my still injured side.
The fact that she didn't have a gun when I passed out doesn't mean anything. I saw this coming. Post shooting trauma is the technical term nowadays because that's how it usually goes down, but it should really be post 'I just killed a person up close and personal' trauma.
When I woke up and he wasn't in attendance I had my suspicions, and every minute that passed without him walking in and rubbing his victory in my face made me even more sure that the fake Scottish merc got what was coming to him, and was buried in a grave of last years leaves. I was just hoping that his death was on Loki's hands, not her's.
THURSDAY, MAY 3RD 2012
1323 HOURS
OHIO STATE REFORMATORY
MANSFIELD OHIO, USA
NORA
He took five minutes of me, 300 seconds, at least after I started counting.
I couldn't straighten my elbows out the whole way, he maybe gave me enough room to move them 10 or 15 degrees, so instead of hitting him with my fists I threw my forearms against his chest softly. My verbal protest had nothing to hinder their strength though.
"IDIOT, FOOL, BASTARD! HOW COULD YOU?! I DID THIS FOR YOU! WHY DIDN'T YOU JUST RUN, LEAVE ME BEHIND?!"
"I KILLED HIM, HE HURT YOU, HE HURT ME, HE WOULDN'T STOP, HE WASN'T GOING TO STOP!" He learned after the first utterance of it not to repeat those words. "Shh Nora, its okay, its not your fault. My arm almost breaking free taught him that "I HAD TO I HAD TO I HAD TO!"
"Your daughter, how could you do this to her?!" By this point he choose silence over response, and just held me half against my will, his arms absorbing my shivers and fury, as his hands traced patterns over my hair and back. "I did this for her!"
"Why would you come back, why would you abandon your family for me, how could you do this to me, to them?" And the volume finally finished falling from echoing intensity to a wet and somewhat breathless whisper into his collarbone. "Why, why would you go back to him?! Why?!"
THURSDAY, MAY 3RD 2012
1325 HOURS
OHIO STATE REFORMATORY
MANSFIELD OHIO, USA
CLINT
When she 'hit' a little too hard and a little close to the drainage tube still in me and bag taped to my side I decided exhaustion was the better option than persuasion. So readjusting my grip to a better one I waited her out, not that it took her long, a bit over 6 and a half minutes from the start, given her already emotional and physical fatigue.
Why would I go back to him? She's not stupid, she knew exactly what we meant when I said 'Why don't you just hurry up and do what we both know you're going to do' and Loki said '...and I will not give you his (freedom)'. I volunteered to let him put me back in the passenger seat in my own flesh again, and even I don't have a 'good' answer to that, but I do have an answer. "Because its how we both walk out of this room, Princess."
The word slips, and her dislike for it flares in her eyes even before the second syllable finishes, but exhaustion or resignation makes her permit it this time with not much more than a frown. Her bigger concerns is shaking her head 'no' and the drops prickling at the edges of her eyelids.
"Yes." I counter with a firm tone. "I know this sucks, but you know this how it has to be. He won't be talked out of it and... " The change in my tone and her confusion cuts her off. "...I don't want you to try."
"This is how I stay with you, and keep you safe." Those tears aren't just prickling any more, they're on her cheeks and in my name. "I'm just taking a vacation, I broke free before, and I'll do it again. You just need to wait for me, here with him. He will keep you safe, and when I come back, we'll find your daughter." The mention of her child makes her confusion return with a different shade.
"She's your daughter silly, I love her already for that, no matter who her father is. I'm not gonna be mad about something that happened before." Nora came to us already grown into the form of a woman, so it's always been something we knew, that she had a past out there somewhere. I can't fault her for that, or him. Maybe he was a better person once, if she was really with him he must have been.
"I'm on your side in this, we will figure out what to do about the rest later. " That brings out a relief chuckle that's been stuck in her for far too long.
It kills me to send that scurrying away on its belly. "He won't let me hurt you again." I hate reminding her of what 'I' did to her back in her house, and I hate even more that I'm promoting his 'goodness' right now, even if it's true. "He didn't know I would do that before, but he won't let me do it again, so don't be scared."
"Now I need you to do something for me." Smart girl. She doesn't even need me to say it, or give me a chance. "No. Clint, no?!" The last no is more plea then a question.
"Yes, Nora. You have to let me go." I fail at reassuring her but I still try, taking her hands in mine and giving them a desperate reassuring squeeze. "I'm coming back. For you, for my kids, for your kid. You just need to wait."
"I can't." She tries. "You can" I push back. "I don't want to."
God, she is making it so hard not to cry. I can't do that right now. If I do that there's no way I'm gonna convince her. "I know. But you have to..." I can see her refusal take that the next step toward 'I won't' before the shock of my betrayal sinks in with the sound of plastic teeth.
The zip ties were in my pocket so they were warm enough for her to not recognize them right away, and letting the weight of my hands draw hers back down after that reassuring squeeze I carefully put one of them back to that ring in the floor before I tied her to it and pretended I couldn't hear how painful my name sounded on her lips. I'm sorry. Just wait for me Princess, please.