Chapter 19
In a blue sweatshirt and a pair of gray sweatpants, Piper paced around the narrow walkway between the bed and the wall. Her long strides made the already small room feel even tinier. She had returned to Alex's room after dinner, but the owner of the room was nowhere to be seen. At first, Piper thought that Alex was taking her leisure time trekking. But, as hours passed, her worries grew into a nerve-wracking paranoia. She had taken a few walks between the two dorms, hoping to run into anyone who had seen Alex. No such luck tonight.
Midnight was right around the corner, and the door finally burst open.
Piper spun on her heels. Her lips broke into a broad smile at the sight of Alex. She literally leapt at her, running her hands through the dark hair, her face and shoulders. "Where have you been!? I was so worried. I thought that something might have happened. Why didn't you—" Piper broke from the embrace when she felt her girlfriend trembling. She had briefly thought that Alex was crying, but she wasn't. What alarmed Piper even more was how ashen Alex appeared. Her eyes were bloodshot and sunken. The usually luminous emerald shade was bleached out to a sick, pale green. Her hair was sweaty, messy strands matted to the sides of her face and neck.
Piper immediately shut the door behind them. She turned around and cupped Alex's face with both hands. Alex appeared to be shuddering from the cold, but her body was sweating like mad. "Alex, talk to me," she demanded.
Alex stared blankly at Piper. Her lips were quivering. She tried to speak, but no words came out.
Piper placed one hand at the back of Alex's neck and pulled her closer, their foreheads resting against each other. "Please," she pleaded, her voice small.
"N—Nicky… she… she's awake." Alex managed a strained smile. The look was a combination of mild confusion and joy. Piper wasn't sure how to feel about it.
"That is great news!" Piper tried to sound enthusiastic. She pulled back a bit, studying Alex for any peculiar signs. "Is that why you came back late? Do you want to sit down?"
Alex stared at the bed. "I… I'd love to—oh—" Her nose began to bleed. For a moment, she just stood there, her hands reaching out slightly. Blood was already dripping down her chin and onto her black jacket, but she didn't wipe it away.
Piper quickly pinched Alex's nose, letting the dazed woman breathe by her mouth. "Here, like this," she said, leading Alex to the bed.
"I… I got it. Thanks." Alex motioned for Piper to remove her hand, and did the pinching herself. She sat down on the bed, and leaned back against the old, cracked wall.
Piper helped Alex out of the jacket. There were already several patches of dry blood on her white sweater. She pressed a hand over Alex's forehead, noting the mild fever. "How are you feeling? Are you all right? Do you want to go to the infirmary?"
Alex tiredly snickered. "I just came from there."
"What were you doing there anyway?" Piper asked, but Alex remained silent. After a few quiet moments, Alex's gaze seemed to be a little clearer. Color had returned to her cheeks, and her breathing sounded normal now. Piper gently stroked the pale face. "Alex, please, talk to me. We have to work together. You can't keep me in the dark like this."
At Piper's plea, Alex was snapped out of her trance. She softly clutched Piper's hand with her free hand. "I'm sorry. I just missed Nicky." She turned away, staring out into the dark through the gap between the curtains. "And I just got carried away by the old days. Too much reminiscence can be bad for your health. Take note." Her free hand pointed at the patches of dry blood on her sweater.
Piper believed that Alex had missed Nicky enough to sneak a late visit, considering how the woman had behaved strangely this morning. What failed to convince her was how messed up Alex looked right now. "I'm not going to repeat myself again. What happened?"
"It's just a nosebleed."
Blue eyes watched Alex like a hawk, and Piper felt her lover slightly recoil. Piper was exhausted from the long day—the lack of sleep, the intensive trainings, the fight with Jessica, and then Red. She was in no mood for games and tricks now, and she could see that Alex sensed how serious she was.
"I, uh… I ran into Red. Stuff happened. Lucky day." The confession finally came.
"Stuff? Clarify that, please."
"We pissed each other off. Nothing unusual. She kicked my ass, if that's what you want to know. Please, don't tell anyone. Let me keep the little dignity I have left." Alex sounded a little strange with her nose still pinched, but Piper found it adorable even when she should not.
Piper rolled her eyes. "I'm glad you can make jokes." But Piper was far from being relieved. She fought Red for the first time today, although briefly, and it still gave her goosebumps when thinking about it. The invisible force drilled into her conscience. The powers that commanded her against her own will. Her body became just a shell—a puppet, while she could only watch it move. The thought sent chill down her spine. "What did you do this time? You know that you can't afford to fight her," she said, frustrated.
"She hates my guts, you know that—wait." Alex leaned in closer, squinting as she examined Piper's face. "What's that bruise over there, above your right brow? Looks pretty rough. Oh, there's another one. Whoa, Pipes, how did you get them?"
"Your girlfriend." Piper lightly slapped Alex's pinching hand. "You kinda look like a fish now," she remarked offhandedly.
"My girlfriend?" Alex raised her brows. A moment passed, and she gathered what Piper had meant. "You got into a fight with Jess? Why? When? What happened? Are you ok?"
Piper felt a little relieved that Alex seemed to have regained her composure, and her many questions out of concern warmed Piper's heart. "Please stop calling her, 'Jess'. It makes it sound like you two are close, and I don't like that."
"Please tell me that you two didn't fight because of me." Alex giggled, earning a small push from Piper.
"She started it. God, she's obsessed with making people's lives miserable! You can't imagine all the shit she's said about you in public."
"I've heard it all since I was thirteen, trust me," Alex said. She let go of her nose for a bit, testing to see if it was still bleeding. Fortunately, the nosebleed seemed to have stopped.
Piper stroked Alex's face, lifting her chin, turning her face left and right. She examined Alex as she pleased. "That bitch is obviously in love with you. But I gave her a few lessons. That should be enough to warn her to stay away. Now, don't let me see her around you again. You've been warned, Alex Vause."
"Ooooh, I'm so scared—ouch!" Alex yelped when Piper punched her arm. "Someone is incredibly aggressive tonight."
Piper snickered when Alex wrapped her arms around her, pulling them both to lie down. It was the powerful embrace, the intensity in it. She was in Litchfield, one of the most dangerous places on earth, but nowhere else could have made her feel this secured. She just wanted to be in these arms forever.
Piper glanced at the switch by the door, and the light was turned off. Soft pool of moonlight shone through the curtains, lending some visibility inside the room.
"That was useful. Thanks." Alex sighed into Piper's ear.
Piper peeked over her shoulder. Alex had already shut her eyes, her hold on Piper's hands relaxed. It had been an incredibly long day for both of them, and Piper was just grateful to have each other now. She brought Alex's hand to her lips and kissed those fingers.
"Hmm, that feels good," Alex hummed sleepily.
In her little spoon position, Piper smiled to herself. For a moment, it felt like one of those peaceful days of their past. Piper clutched Alex's forearm and pressing her back harder against the taller woman. Alex's warm breaths that were tingling on her ear and neck assured her that the woman was still alive. Piper closed her eyes and contentedly let exhaustion took over.
"When will you learn not to piss Red off? She's Red, you know. You're not very bright, are you?" Nicky chewed a toothpick. She might have lost several pounds during the coma state, but she seemed rather energized, generally happy that her friends were here, waiting for her when she woke up. To be fair, Piper thought that Nicky looked better rested than Alex.
Alex was occupying the chair on the right side of Nicky's bed, Lorna on the left. She glanced up, visibly annoyed. "I'm not scared of her," she grunted.
"Like I said, not very bright. She could have made you into another Mendez. There's already an example for you. Look it up."
"You talk too much. Release date?"
Nicky pouted. "Sick of visiting already?"
"Hey, Alex was very worried about you," Piper chimed in. She was standing at the footboard of the bed, feeling uneasy at where the conversation was going. She knew that Alex had a fight with Red last night, but not in details. She didn't even know that Nicky was awake when it happened. Now the whole conversation felt as though the threat to Alex's memories was nothing. No, it wouldn't be nothing. It would kill Piper.
"Well, Blondie, I saved your girlfriend's ass again. Glad to be of help," Nicky said, and turned to Alex. "You're one lucky bastard. I was pretty sure that Red wasn't going to make you her new driver. She was probably planning to make you into a six-year-old again."
Piper stiffened, and Lorna quickly touched Piper's arm. "It wasn't that bad. Nichols here is probably exaggerating it a bit."
"No, I'm not. Vause was down on the floor, busted! She couldn't even properly count one to ten in the first two hours. Daya wanted to admit her and make her spend the night here. She was completely out."
Piper felt bile rising up her throat. She recalled how battered Alex had appeared last night. Alex had made light out of the situation. Even now. Piper had no idea how serious it was.
Alex groaned, arms across her chest. "Come on, she knew that I couldn't do much, if I didn't want to lose my residency here. Given a fair fight, I can fry her fat ass in seconds—"
"Do you think that's funny? You think that it's some kind of a joke?" Piper interrupted. Her voice was so loud that all the other occupants in the room stopped whatever they were doing and turned to look at her.
Conscious of the stares, Piper took a deep breath in. She turned and left the room. She could hear Alex getting up from the chair, jogging down the corridor after her.
"Piper…! Pipes, come on. Don't do this." Alex grabbed Piper's arm, pulling her to a stop.
Piper turned to glare at the raven-haired woman. "How many times do we have to do this? When will you be honest with me?" Piper felt stupid. She should have known by seeing Alex's condition last night. She was frustrated that she kept being blinded by the thin veil that was Alex's lie.
Alex bit her bottom lip. "I didn't want to worry you. It wasn't the first time she tried this with me, you know that. Besides, I survived it. Everything is fine now."
"That's not good enough, Al," Piper said, and walked away.
Lorna peeked at the empty doorway, and then frowned at Nicky. "You are in so much trouble. What was that for?"
Nicky's eyes widened, chewing her toothpick. "Vause would never tell Chapman what really happened, so somebody had to do it."
"No. No. No. You're just messing things up!" the smaller woman hissed.
"I almost lost my best friend, OK? From what I saw, Red was fucking serious. She was going to kill her memories! Vause is gonna need all the help she can get. And her girlfriend is pretty badass, you know what I mean."
Lorna started to fiddle over her crochet. "You should start worrying about yourself, Nicky."
"What do you mean?"
Lorna continued to pretend to focus on her handiwork, her voice a little shaken. "You know, you just came out of the coma. Shouldn't you be thinking more about yourself, your future? I'm sure that those two can take care of themselves. They've gone through some tough situations before."
"Hey, you didn't see what happened last night. The shit came right out of a horror movie." Nicky grumbled. "But, hell, I'm alive and kicking. What more do I want? Can't get any better than this." She impatiently peeked up at the IV bags on the pole.
"Ms. Claudette said that you should refrain from using your powers for two more weeks. She advised that you shouldn't leave Litchfield until further notice."
"You gotta be fucking kidding me. I just woke up from a long-ass coma. I want some real food, not frozen meals in the canteen. Fuck that shit."
Lorna glowered at Nicky. "Well, that sounds a lot better than what we got in the South. Appreciate what you have, Nichols."
"I don't need your lecture." Nicky grumbled like a child. "By the way, how did the wedding go? I was unconscious for weeks. You must have been married by now."
There was a silence before Nicky looked up again. Lorna just watched her with a reluctant smile.
"You were in the coma for a month," Lorna said. "Vause was injured, too, and she was here for a week. They had to hide you two in the SHU, because the police came looking for Vause. Everyone wanted to be optimistic, but honestly, no one thought that you'd ever wake up again. Not even Red." She lifted her newly threaded, lime-colored crochet. "This isn't the first I've finished, while being here… every day. I've made three bags, a purse and two scarfs. This is my third hat."
"That's a lot of work." Nicky then took a long moment, studying the tiny woman. "You look very beautiful today, Morello. I think I haven't told you that."
Lorna tucked her hair behind her ear, smiling timidly. "Thank you."
They both stared into each other's eyes, and Lorna felt readier to open up.
"Christopher and I were never a thing. He asked me out once, but he never wanted to see me again after the first date. He told me that it wouldn't work. He said that I was just wrong for him."
Nicky remained quiet as Lorna continued to confess.
"I lied to everyone about dating him, because I felt that it was the right thing to be. For a long time, I thought it was. Until… until it looked like that you'd never wake up again. It got me thinking." Lorna dryly chuckled. "It was a little too late, but—"
"Not too late."
Lorna looked up at the wild-haired woman. Nicky did look a little exhausted after an intense morning, but the woman had refused to rest. Her gaze was confident, very much relaxed.
"I always knew that you were right for me," Nicky said.
Tears brimmed Lorna's eyes.
"And you can have my frozen meals, if you would marry me."
Lorna laughed. She got up from the chair and sat down on the edge of the bed. She pulled out a small, crimson-colored, crochet purse from her pocket. She hovered it over Nicky's open palm and shook it slightly. A paper ring slipped down and rested on Nicky's palm, light like a feather.
"Oh, my God, I didn't see that," a raspy voice interrupted.
Nicky and Lorna looked up to see Alex by the door, leaning against the doorframe. The newly engaged couple was grinning from ear to ear.
"No problem. I want a witness anyway," Nicky joked.
"Congratulations," Alex said, smiling.
"Thanks," Lorna said, shyly holding Nicky's hand.
"You look like shit. What happened?" Nicky asked.
Alex pushed the glasses up her nose. "She got mad. Thanks to you."
"Well, she has every right to be."
Alex groaned. "Nicky, I'm drowning right here. I can barely get by a day without getting into a fight with someone, and Piper is the last person that I want to fight with."
"Then start being honest with her!" Nicky slapped her own forehead.
Lorna nodded in agreement with her fiancée.
Alex moved into the room, taking up the seat again. "I wish that it's that easy. It's... complicated."
"What happened last night wasn't OK, Vause. If Red succeeded, we'd have lost you forever. It was just your goddamn luck that I just fucking happened to wake up right then. You won't get so lucky like this next time. Chapman has to know, so she can help you."
"And have her end up like you?" Alex shifted uncomfortably in her seat.
A moment of silence passed, and Nicky spoke again. Her tone softened. "Come on, it was an accident. Shit. You're still blaming yourself over it?"
"With me, there's never an accident. I keep hurting people around me, and it wasn't just you. You have no idea." Alex kept her gaze on the floor. "I can't lose her."
Nicky studied her friend, sighing. Alex was gone from Litchfield for eight years, and while Nicky knew a little about her new faction, she had no full details of what really happened. All she knew was that it had changed Alex. It had brought down the ruthless giant—shot down the burning star. It had toughened Alex, but also hollowed her out. She wouldn't ask, because her friend would never tell. Whatever nightmares she had. Whatever terrible things that had happened.
"She can't lose you either," Nicky simply said.
Alex didn't respond. Her hands clutched the armrests.
Loud music blared through the first floor of the dance club, the crowd moving along the blinding rhythm. Inside a private room upstairs, Alex finished the third line of white powder on the table, inhaling deeply. She leaned back against the couch, and let her mind go wild. Away. She needed to be away. Tonight was one of those nights that the pain became unbearable. She needed to take her mind away from Piper. She wanted to forget Piper. She must.
Piper had moved again. It had been nearly ten months since their breakup, but Alex still checked up on her occasionally. She wanted to make sure that Fahri hadn't found out. She still wanted to see Piper's face, but it cut deep into her heart every time Piper smiled for someone else that wasn't her.
Piper had moved for the third time in ten months. Three different boyfriends (excluding a few other men and women she went on a date with).
The first was Alex's doctor, Dr. Madison. They dated for about six months. For a while, their relationship threatened and scared Alex. He was handsome. He had a respectable career. He had a bright future to offer Piper, something Alex didn't. Alex relished when Piper broke up with him and moved out. Alex only checked back on Madison's apartment once after their breakup, contented to see him sit alone on the couch in his dark living room, drinking up his Scotch. Piper left him. Piper didn't want him, his future or the security he could bring her. In the back of Alex's mind, it was a strange sort of triumph, an invisible battle she didn't fight, but won.
Piper's next relationship was short-lived. She moved in with a male model she met in a club, but left only after a month. She lived at her parents' house for another month before hooking up with another man.
The third boyfriend was a Jewish, modest, young man. He was timid. He was nowhere near as handsome as Madison, or as charming as the model. He possessed nothing that could intimidate Alex, but Alex couldn't help but fear again. It agonized her every waking minute. It tortured her with all the possibilities he could have with Piper. It wasn't his wealth or his harmless career of a terrible writer that threatened Alex. It was the genuine, caring look he always gave Piper. This man truly loved Piper, and Alex could see it even from the distance. Deep in her heart, Alex knew that love was the only thing that she could offer Piper, and it was what made Piper stay with her. But now someone with the same ardent passion came into the picture, rivaling their past.
Within two months, Piper moved in with him.
One night, the young man took Piper to meet his father, and when it turned out to be Howard Bloom, Alex's heart sank to the bottom of the ocean.
Alex knew that her hate for Howard was unfair. Unlike her own father, Howard had done nothing wrong to her mother. He had loved Diane and helped her, but Alex just didn't want to get used to kindness. She refused to fall for the illusion, afraid to get hurt again. But, now, his son was doing everything for the woman Alex loved, while she could just watched, powerless.
Flashes of lightning began to blaze in the night sky. Alex couldn't help it. She couldn't control it. She felt a heavy trail of tear slide down her beating heart, and she was angry with herself that she still felt things that she should not. She was standing just outside the window to the living room of the Blooms mansion, watching Larry and Piper fight for the TV remote control, laughing with each other. Then they talked about their diets, updated each other on their friends' lives, and debated which parties they wanted to go this weekend. They seemed to be even more in-tune with each other than Alex had previously thought. Larry was in the same league with 'Piper Chapman'. They fitted like two pieces of puzzles made for each other. Alex couldn't feel more like an outsider—an old painting, left forgotten in the attic, never to be found again.
"To what do I owe the pleasure of this visit?"
Alex stiffened by the voice interrupting. She silently reprimanded herself for being so reckless, but it was to be expected whenever her mind revolved around Piper. She was her weakness.
Alex suppressed her sigh, and turned to smirk at the man. "Hey, Howard."
"It's been a long while since you've paid me a visit. How is life treating you?" Howard was in a crimson sweater and a pair of khaki pants. His glasses were new and clear. His hands were warm in his pockets. He glanced into the living room. "Are you here for her?"
It didn't surprise Alex that Howard instantly caught on that Piper had to be one of the recruits Alex was after. She could sense the hint of worry in his voice. As far as she knew, Howard's son turned out to be an ordinary human. Larry would be defenseless against an intruder like Alex.
Alex took one last look at Piper. Just Piper, excluding the competitor—the fears. She just watched Piper. Her precious. Her love.
Alex turned to Howard again and said, "No, I'm not here to take her. She's found her place." With that, she walked away. She didn't know where the dark, lonely path would take her, but she knew that she had to go. It was time. It was for Piper.
"Everyone will eventually find their place, Alex." Howard's words followed her, but she didn't look back.
"I've found mine," Alex said.
"I'll be waiting for you."
Alex kept walking. She wanted to laugh at Howard's optimism. She didn't know what he saw in her, or what he had hoped of her. Perhaps, it was just his love for Diane that had blinded him. Perhaps, it was just her own fears that had blinded her.
That night, Alex returned to the club, where Fahri and the rest were partying at. To Fahri, her drugs abuse sprung from the grief over Piper's death, and Alex was just too happy to play the part.
"Slow down, will you? I can't afford to have you OD." Fahri shook his head.
Alex cut out another set of three lines of white powder. She took them in. She let it take her away. Far away from all her dreams. From Piper.
Alex never saw Piper again until their paths crossed in Litchfield three years later.
The large warehouse located along the south shore of the island, serving as an auto repair, or just about any mechanical repairs the residents need. There were at least six mechanics working, and quite a few dozens of residents hanging around. Scooters, motorcycles, three-wheelers, PlayStation and Xbox consoles were among popular items in the warehouse.
With her blonde, silky hair and fair skin, Piper hardly blended in with the crowd. It was the first time she had been to the warehouse. She didn't feel particularly interested in all the mechanical stuff, but they didn't appall her either. Stella had shown Piper around like it was her own backyard, and it had been a fun, few hours for Piper. At any rate, it managed to take her mind off things, in particular, her concerns over a certain, stubborn brunette.
Piper pursed her lips at the hundredth time her mind revolving back to this morning. She wanted to touch Alex again—to grab her shoulders and shake some sense into her. To tell her how much she meant to her. But she doubted that Alex would understand. Alex seemed to understand anything but the depth of Piper's love for her. Alex was devoted to her without expecting anything in return, and that just killed Piper.
Pools of sunlight shone down through the row of five skylights. Piper followed as Stella and her friend, Kyle, the mechanic, examined Falcon's broken arm on one of the large, wooden tables.
"I need Wedge to get these items for me. These parts are very old and rusty. That's why it broke easily." Kyle pointed to the messy web of wires inside the robot's arm, which Piper had no idea what exactly he was pointing at.
Stella lightly elbowed Kyle. "Now you make it sound like it wasn't Chapman and Red's amazing powers that broke his arm!"
"It was. But Falcon is old, too. Another reason for it to break." Kyle was a bearded, fifty-year-old man with short, gray hair, and a kind smile. "I think that it'd take only about a week to fix."
"Thank you. But Red specifically told me to fix it." Piper inwardly grumbled.
"You can help. I can show you a few things. But don't worry about it. I doubt that Red wanted you to become a mechanic. I don't plan to retire anytime soon. I love Litchfield!"
"I'll give the list to Wedge today. Thanks, Kyle," Stella said.
"See you guys tomorrow." Kyle tipped his cap and walked off.
Stella turned to Piper. "See? Piece of cake. You don't even have to lift a hand. The other mechanics are too scared of Red to take up the job. Kyle's the man!"
Piper walked out of the warehouse, a cup of hot black coffee in her hand. She took a sip, gazing down at the distant, southern shores below. Alex's favorite spot was about ten miles south. Although Alex was likely at the infirmary with Nicky, Piper briefly entertained the idea that it was where her girlfriend might be. She liked to imagine Alex relax along the shore, humming and smiling at the bluest sky. She liked to imagine them in each other's arms, safe and contented, away from all troubles. But she knew that those days were only a distant dream. Not when Kubra still had Diane. Not when Red was trying to get Alex. Piper had to be strong enough to protect her.
"Chapman… Chapman..."
"What?" Piper snapped out of her thought. She turned to see a frown on Stella's face, which was now only an inch next to hers. She immediately took a step back, and Stella laughed.
"I called you for about five times, and you weren't here. What were you thinking about?"
"I—I just thought that maybe I should try to fix Falcon myself. What if the others tell Red that Kyle helps me? He could get into trouble."
"There's no need to worry. Red and Kyle are old friends!" Stella laughed, and Piper began to relax. "But I don't think you were really thinking about Falcon. Is something troubling you?"
Piper raised a brow, a smirk tugging at the corner of her lips. "I thought that you could walk through walls, and not reading mind."
"I could walk through the wall of your heart." Stella put both hands on her chest.
Piper narrowed her eyes. "That is the cheesiest thing I've heard in a long time."
"You're not impressed," Stella groaned.
"I have a—"
"An Alex?"
Piper stopped for a second. "That sounds about right," she said. For a complete stranger, Stella surely had paid attention to her. She had been spending time in the South, but mostly kept to Alex's room. She didn't recall having seen Stella before. Perhaps, she had been concentrating on Alex so much that everything else was just background.
"Right. I've been fooling around for too long now. I've got something to show you." Stella pulled out a contraband cell phone out of her pocket.
"What are you doing!? People could have seen us!" Piper hissed, trying to use her body to block out the view from the warehouse.
Stella handed her the cell phone. Piper took the device and held it low, glancing around to make sure that nobody was watching them. She then began to slide through the images on the screen.
Piper paused. Chill ran down her spine, gripping her to the core. There were a few photos taken of her in the North campus. Some showed her coming in and out of the South. Several with Alex. But what struck Piper the most was the lone picture of Diane. It showed Diane seated on a chair in the center of what appeared to be a dark room. Her hair was greasy. Sweaty, blotchy skin. Dilated pupil. Clouded gaze. There were no wounds visible, but the poor woman looked scared out of her mind.
Piper shoved the phone at Stella's chest, growling in her face. "What do you want?"
"You have an obligation to fulfill, Chapman."
"Talk."
Stella peeked past Piper's shoulder, and then smirked. "Stay still," she ordered. Then she closed in on Piper and pecked her on the lips.
Piper froze. She stared down her nose, blue eyes cold. "What the fuck was that for?"
"Behave, or Diane gets hurt."
Piper closed her eyes. "I will fucking break your fucking neck, Carlin."
"Have you killed? I doubt that you have it in you. I was surprised when Danny called me to keep an eye on you." Stella shrugged.
Piper clenched her fists. "I'd suggest you not to test me right now."
"Will you kill for Vause? Really? You'd murder, forever damning your own life, for someone like her? Once you commit it, you can never take it back, Chapman."
Piper took a step back from Stella. Nobody had to tell her that she was scared. The idea alone terrified her. Murder was unimaginable to her. But when Alex's life was on the line, Piper didn't feel that she had any other choice. "I will do anything to keep her safe," she said, and she meant every word of it.
"We'll find out soon enough." Smirking, Stella then held up the list. "I'll give this to Wedge. I truly wanna help." She winked at Piper before going back into the warehouse.
Piper fought to restrain herself from punching that wink into oblivion. She wiped her lips with the back of her hands. Fucking bitch. Only when she turned around that she saw Alex at the foot of the hill. She had no idea how long Alex had been standing there. Alex's face was expressionless, and Piper stiffened at once, realizing why Stella kissed her.
"Hey—" Piper moved towards her girlfriend, but Alex turned away. "Wait. Alex…! Alex!" She sprinted after the taller woman, having a bit of difficulty catching up with Alex's long strides.
Out of breath, Piper caught up. She grabbed Alex's arm and turned her around. They were a good distance away from the warehouse now. The sound of waves crashing against the shores grew louder as they had trekked down the path.
"It wasn't what you think. She just kissed me, that asshole. I didn't do anything. In fact, I just knew her yesterday. I swear to God, Alex. You have to believe me. There's nothing going on between us."
Alex studied Piper for a moment, her facial expression calm. "You didn't pull away," she remarked.
Piper stalled. She couldn't possibly tell Alex what she and Stella were talking about. And she wondered if Alex had heard any of their conversations. "I—I was shocked. But I did warn her not to do that again. I was very upset."
Without another word, Alex just sighed and started walking down the hill.
Piper felt her heart twist in panic. She was frustrated and angry at herself for letting Stella play her so easily. She hurried after Alex. "Alex! It was really nothing! Do you want me to prove it to you? I can. I can go back right now and kick her ass, if you want. Al, please, you have to believe—ouch—" She ran into Alex's back when the taller woman suddenly stopped in her tracks. Frowning, she rubbed her nose a bit and looked up at Alex.
Alex turned around and said, "Shut up. I believe you."
"Really? You do?" Piper beamed, her cheeks hurting.
Alex let out a snicker. "C'mere." She put her arm around Piper's shoulder.
Piper immediately clutched the hand hanging down her shoulder, afraid that Alex might change her mind. She kept gazing at Alex all the while they started down the path together. The leafy, tall trees made a perfect roof over their heads. The mild wind brought along the smell of salt from the sea.
"Watch where you're going."
Piper grinned like a fool. "I'm happy that you believe me."
"I don't think that she's your type. Ninja turtles tattoo. A Justin Bieber wannabe." Alex rolled her eyes.
Piper stopped, her hand slipping from Alex's. She couldn't believe what Alex had just said. Alex simply didn't trust her.
"By the way, good news from the infirmary. Nicky and Morello are getting married. Can you believe that? God knows how many times they've hooked up and broken up before. I wanted to come find you to deliver the news, but that Carlin just kinda ruined the mood now." Alex strolled down the path, hands in her pockets.
"That's great. I'm happy for them," Piper said. Her voice was a little strained, and Alex was quick to pick it up.
Alex stopped in her tracks and looked over her shoulder, their gazes locked.
"I mean, I'm not surprised at all. Lorna visits Nicky every day. Of course, she loves her. When there's love, you can always see it in their eyes." Piper kept her gaze on Alex for a long moment, and it was Alex who looked away first.
Alex kicked at the dirt and continued down the trail. "You know, there's an old warehouse about fifteen minutes from here. It was smaller than the one running right now. They keep old stuff there. You might find something interesting."
Piper followed the raven-haired woman, hugging her arms tightly. She wasn't cold, but her anger was seeping through to the surface, burning her inside. She wanted to tell Alex how much she loved her. She wanted to show Alex all that she felt, but she wasn't sure how to make Alex believe her.
Alex took a left turn, and led them to the abandoned warehouse. It was a high-ceiling, crimson-painted building. She pushed the door open with her foot, the dust fuming out. "This was where Falcon was manufactured. She's one of the oldest models that's still in use. The older models were left to rot here. Now they just buy from the Japanese and the Germans."
Piper followed into the building. The floor was vastly empty, covered with a thin layer of dust. A few, long tables, chairs and shelves were left scattered, some knocked down. There were a twin set of large windows on the left wall, letting light stream into the warehouse.
"Why are you showing me this?" Piper wondered aloud.
Alex moved further into the building, and then stopped in middle of the warehouse. She began to kick the dust on the floor.
"Alex, what the hell?" Piper buried her nose at the crook of her arm, coughing at the fume of dust.
Alex bent down to grab what seemed to be a ring-shaped handle secured on the floor. She pulled up the door and pushed it back, letting it slap down against the floor.
"Sweet." Grinning, Alex turned to gesture at Piper. "C'mere."
Piper waved away the dust as she moved closer to Alex. They were kneeling side by side, but she still felt an invisible wall between them. She wanted to reach out for Alex, but she wouldn't.
Alex gestured down at the nine bodies of metal lying in the underground compartment. They were much slimmer and smaller than Falcon. Their average height was only about eight feet tall.
"The one on the left is 'Ava', the first robot ever made here. Howard was very proud of her. She made it to the covers of a few magazines, you know. Damn, it was so long ago. I can't remember the names. But she was too slow, and short-circuited a lot during trainings. After a few years, she had to be replaced by newer models."
Piper bent a little to get a closer look at the robot. "God, she's beautiful," she murmured in awe.
Gold-painted body. Although in some parts, the gold had peeled away through the years. A single, narrow visor acted as her eyes. Her facial structure was slim. Her body had sharp curves that were accentuated as armor. Her arms and legs were long and slender like those of elves. Ava appeared more of a work of art than a training robot.
Alex proceeded to explain the other robots. Piper looked up, watching green eyes sparkle as the woman spoke. She was surprised that Alex still got her every time, even after all these years, or even now that she was still upset with her.
"That's Victor. He's small, so they used him to train children, or newer residents. But he kept breaking down, and it was getting really expensive to fix him. Once they had to send him to Germany due to some mechanical problems. So, after a while, they… they stopped… using him..." Alex's words trailed off when she glanced up and met with the blue eyes.
Piper held their gaze, her chin resting on her palm. She was making sure to let Alex know what was on her mind.
Alex didn't look away this time, but she didn't speak further either. Alex had been trying to distract them from the anger and frustration, but they both knew that it wasn't working. That fire was still burning in their hearts, waiting to explode.
Piper winced when Alex grabbed her face. Alex pulled her closer, her right thumb wiping along Piper's lips. The movement was agonizingly slow at first but roughened up until it hurt. It was as though Alex was trying to brush off any marks Stella had left on Piper. Alex's touches were anything but gentle, and Piper bit back the cry. She wanted Alex to brush it off, to reclaim her. She couldn't hold herself back anymore. She pressed into the taller woman, capturing Alex's lips hungrily. Alex immediately returned her the attention she needed.
"You're mine." The husky voice whispered as Alex bit Piper's bottom lip.
Piper moaned into her lover's mouth, their hot breaths mingled. Alex. If only Alex could hear her—feel what her heart was beating for.
It was almost dusk when Piper woke again. Warm, pinkish light streamed in through the murky windows, partially illuminating their bodies. They were lying naked on the floor, their jackets and sweaters spread out beneath them. Piper rested her chin on Alex's chest, studying the sleeping face. She had let Alex take her again and again, and she claimed Alex in return. She wanted Alex to know that they belonged to each other, body and soul.
"And you're mine," Piper whispered, entranced by the sight before her.
Alex opened her eyes, groaning a little. She rubbed her eyes, glancing around. "What time is it? I can't believe we overslept."
"Did I wear you out?"
Alex chuckled. "That's more like my question."
"Well, in that case..." Piper pecked Alex's lips before climbing on top of her, straddling her thigh.
"Piper?" Still a little groggy, Alex ran her hands up and down along the blonde's sides.
Piper began to move her hips, slowly at first, but then picked up the pace. They moaned in unison, instantly aroused. Green eyes were clear now, staring up at Piper. Alex's hands eventually slid down to her buttocks, gripping her, urging her to go faster.
"You're so beautiful," Alex muttered hotly, thirst in her voice.
Piper tried to muffle her cries, only to break down into louder, choked sobs. Her juices wetted Alex's thigh, dripping down to the jacket beneath them. Soft, low groans escaped Alex's throat as she slipped one hand between Piper's legs, drawing a heated cry from the blonde. Gripping Alex's shoulders, Piper lifted her hips up a little higher, riding hard as Alex worked on her.
"Oh… oh, God, Al…!" Piper panted. She was almost there, but abruptly pulled away, earning a frustrated groan from her lover. She shakily repositioned herself, so that their faces were between each other's legs. Piper dove her head down and caught Alex's sensitive flesh in her mouth, sucking it. Alex's hips jerked repeatedly in response.
"Pipes—ah—"
Piper moaned against her lover's heat, kissing her deep. Alex was already wet that Piper didn't have to work very hard to arouse her. She tried to lick her dry, taking in all of her scent.
Breathless, Alex responded with equal passion, giving all her attention to Piper's needs. Piper could feel the woman trembling under her, and she knew that Alex was closer than she had thought. She picked up the speed of her tongue, while holding down Alex's quivering thighs.
They both rocked against each other's face, their centers burning. Their lips were bruised and hungry. Piper slipped first, crying out Alex's name again and again, and Alex soon followed with deep, throaty moans. They rode hard until they couldn't feel their legs anymore, completely spent. As their orgasms subsided, they lied back down, gasping for breaths.
Alex took a moment to collect herself. "C'mere," she muttered.
Piper obeyed. She moved up, meeting Alex with light kisses before lying down next to her. Still slightly shaken, she rested her head against the pale shoulder, one hand on the heaving chest. She loved how she made Alex come. How deep and soft Alex's cries were compared to the sharp, violent rocking of her body. Piper pecked the freckles on the shoulder, claiming them. They were like stars in the milky sky.
In comfortable silence, Alex was staring up at the ceiling. The pinkish light was streaming down through the skylights, softly illuminating the warehouse. "This warehouse was my favorite place to hang when I was a kid. Not that I was into mad trainings or something, but it was the only place I could let off some steam."
"Poor robots. Imagine the angry, little Alex running around, blasting lightning for fun," Piper joked. But then her face fell a bit. "When we were together for a year, you hardly ever talked about your childhood. But you knew about me. That's not fair. I want to know more. Tell me more."
Alex chortled. She traced her fingertips along Piper's sun-kissed shoulder blade. "Well, according to my mom, my father is a rock God, who left her even before she gave birth to me. I believe that they still communicated, but I didn't ask. I didn't want to know, and mom just kind of respected that."
Piper grimaced at the mention of Diane's husband. Lee was the reason Diane's safe house was found. Danny must have tracked Lee down, and he sold Diane out. He unknowingly put both Diane and Alex in grave danger, trapping Piper in this web of retribution. She didn't want to imagine how furious Alex would be if she found out what Lee had done.
"We didn't have much. Mom had three—no, four jobs, and her health deteriorated as she grew older. She had some serious back problems, and needed surgeries. So I planned to leave Litchfield to get a job. We really needed the money."
Piper pressed her body closer to Alex, twirling the dark strands of hair around her fingers. "Is that why you left for other faction?"
Alex paused for a long moment before she said, "No. Howard helped us out financially. They had a brief affair, but he's loved her for many years."
The admission took Piper by surprise. She lifted her head, gazing at Alex. "I've heard Polly mention it, but… it's nice to hear it from you."
Alex pulled Piper closer, if that was possible, and kissed the top of her head. "I'm sorry that we didn't have an honest start. I'll make it up to you this time, I promise."
Piper smiled widely, nuzzling up against Alex's neck. With Alex's arms wrapped protectively around her, there was no other place in the world she would like to be right now. It felt like a dream to her. Just a month ago, she was still engaged. She still had a normal life waiting for her out there. Some kind of an idea of security—a future. But things never seemed to go as planned whenever Alex was involved. It was inevitable to her. Alex was.
"I'm so glad we met again," Piper murmured.
Alex hummed happily, "Me, too."
"My life was kind of boring. I had everything, but I still felt empty. I wanted to go out there. I wanted to face all the adventures, you know. I wanted to feel alive." Piper sat up and gazed down at Alex. "But my adventure stops here. With you."
There was a look of both surprise and happiness in Alex's eyes, and Piper just felt warm in her heart. She brushed the strands of raven hair from the pale face. "When I leave Litchfield, I'll start a business. I'm really into skin products. I've talked to Polly about it. She seems to like the idea a lot. She makes soaps and shampoos, but she's pretty clueless about marketing. It could work. I think it'll work."
Alex rubbed Piper's arms. "I'm sure you'll work something out. You're a bright, young woman."
"And you can go back to school. Get a real degree. Get a job. We could have a normal life together."
Alex raised her brows, chuckling. "That sounds like a plan."
"I'm serious! We have to make it work. We can make it work. Don't you believe in us?"
Alex sighed. "I'm on the run, Pipes. I've got very few options left. Either I have to hide here forever, or I have to kill Kubra. The second choice doesn't seem to be very practical. He's surrounded by his bodyguards at all times." Alex grumbled as she traced her fingers along Piper's clavicle. "Can't we just enjoy what we have now? Let's not worry about tomorrow, because I don't know what's gonna happen. God, I've fucked up so much. You have no idea how many times I've wished to turn back the time. All the fucked up things that I've done. I… I'm so sorry that I—"
Piper bent down to silence Alex with a deep, feverish kiss. They both were a little breathless when Piper broke away, cupping Alex's face with both hands. "I'm not sorry. I love you, and I don't regret it." She kissed Alex again, needing to breathe her in. She murmured against the full lips. "Will you marry me?"
Alex stared at Piper, momentarily dumbfounded. "What?"
Piper wasn't sure what she had expected, but her face turned cold. She straightened up as Alex stuttered for words.
"I—I can't. No, Pipes, we can't."
Piper felt her heart crushed in her chest, but she managed to keep a straight face.
Alex sat up, so that their faces were leveled with each other. She tenderly held Piper's hands, her thumb caressing Piper's fingers. "Listen, we've just got back together for three weeks, Pipes. Everything is still so… so uncertain. But, at least, we've got each other now. What's the hurry?"
Piper stiffened as Alex studied her, her hands cold in Alex's hold. In truth, she was scared of what tomorrow might bring. She was scared that she wouldn't be able to fight Kubra. She was scared for Alex's safety even more now that Stella was in the picture. She was scared that she wouldn't be able to get Diane back. She was scared that if she fucked it all up, there would be no turning back. All her fears were flooding fast, driving up tears to her eyes. She didn't want to cry, but she couldn't hold back anymore. Tears founded their way out, sliding down her cheeks.
"Pipes? What's wrong? What's going on?" Alex looked alarmed, holding Piper's face.
Piper smiled a little as Alex's thumbs wiped the tears from her cheeks. She shook her head. "I was just thinking… how we wasted four years of our lives being apart. I always thought about you even when I was with someone new. Even when I got engaged to Larry. You were always on my mind." She gazed into the green eyes, sensing how Alex's hands slightly grew rigid. "I always compared them to you. They were better—safer choices, I knew that. They were what I should expect. But, here I am, regretting it. I wish that I could get those four years back. I want them back. I want more time with you." More tears flooded down her cheeks, and she couldn't control her sob now.
Alex instantly pulled Piper close, her left hand caressing the back of Piper's head, her other hand on the small of her back. She cooed into her ear. "Hey, it's ok. We're ok, Pipes. We're together now. That's all that matters, right?"
Piper slowly broke from the embrace. She watched Alex for the longest time, her hands stroking her face. "If something happens, you have to know that I love you."
Alex frowned. "Piper—"
"Say it. Tell me that you believe it."
"What's this—"
"Please, Al… Please."
It took Alex a long moment before she sighed in defeat. She gazed into the blue orbs, clutching the hand that was caressing her face. "No matter what happens, you know that I love you, too."
Upon their confessions, their bodies reacted on their own. They moved closer, and their lips crashed against each other. Their hands roamed all over their hair and bodies. For a fleeting moment, they felt like nothing could come between them.
Nothing at all.
A/N: story is outlined for 24 chapters. Not too far now. Thanks for reading! xoxo