Chapter 3

Cheaters

"Hey Hopper…"

Hopper glanced up at his wife, who was dressed in one of her prettiest dresses, a knee-length, off-the-shoulder black gown with white beads threaded in elegant patterns. She wore tall white stilettos with a strap around her ankle and matching jewellery. Her hair was piled up into a stylish mess of a bun, despite the fact that strands of wavy brown hair were already falling in front of her face.

"Yes?" he asked, hoping that she had maybe dressed up specially for him.

"I'm going to the new bar that opened up with Mads, Raven and Cerise," Briar informed, fixing her dangling earrings in front of the mirror.

"Oh," Hopper said, deflating a little. "But it might be dangerous…can't you just stay home?"

Briar grabbed her mini white handbag and placed in her fold-up fire poker (that she carried everywhere).

"Haters gonna hate," she replied dismissively, and strode out of the room. That was probably all she was going to say.

"Bye," Hopper managed, and wondered if he should call Ginger over.

He heard the car revv off, and then got a text from none other then the one who just left:

Briar: Call Ginger or something, I'll be getting too wasted for any romance

—

Raven drove up her Toyota to Cerise's golden-brown subrubian house. Her bestie was waiting in front of the door, wearing the dress that Raven had bought her last Christmas - a simple black bodice and an elaborate lace red skirt, with black flats to match. Her hair was in a braid.

"Hey," Cerise greeted flatly as she plopped onto the seat next to Raven.

"Husband being a douche?"

"You bet."

"Must be something that runs in the family."

They chuckled for a few seconds, then Cerise averted her eyes to Raven's clothes. "Nice," she commented, referring to Raven's spaghetti-strap black jumpsuit.

"Thanks," Raven replied, before they sped off.

Raven parked in a busy carpark after ten minutes of silent driving. They followed glowing arrows to a…

….…

….

Hole in the ground.

"Huh," Cerise said, mystified.

Raven read the intructions on a lit-up chalkboard next to the hole. Shrugging, she stood at the mouth of the hole, gazed in, and jumped.

Raven cried out in fear as she seemed to slide down a very steep drop slide. Her arms dangled uselessly behind her as she sped faster and faster and faster. At last, she fell down on solid ground with a thump, landing on her face.

"Oh dear…"

Straightening her high ponytail, she looked around and spotted a light before a loud scream came from above.

"Uh, Cerise…?"

As if answering her question, aforementioned girl crashed onto her friend. They lay in a tangled heap, both breathing deeply.

"Creative way of getting down here, I suppose," Cerise panted.

Raven nodded. They stood up and walked towards the light. Immediately, they were engulfed in flashing lights. Adjusting to the brightness, the two widened their eyes to see one of the most amazing things they ever saw.

How to explain it? The bar was a beautiful, organised, mess. It was huge, too, with ebony plank boarding along the walls and floor. The tables were huge mushrooms, the little stools likewise. Tucked against the back wall (which was lined with huge floor-length mirrors) was a set of tables of brown marble, with high-backed plushy red chairs to match. The dance floor was in glowing neon tiles that changed colour whenever someone walked on it. Disco lights and a huge silver disco ball hung above the colourful alcove, which was lined with built-in couches trimmed in gold. A giant chess set was propped up near the side, opposite to the further-away bar, which was lined with drinks and wine bottles as far as the eye could see.

"Hey, GUYS!"

Turning towards the sound of Briar's voice, Raven and Cerise spotted Briar, in a stylish black dress, and Maddie, her unusually curly hair in twin braids, wearing a white halter-neck midi dress with a golden sash across her middle. The two were seated at the high-backed chairs.

"Haven't seen you two in ages!" Briar greeted as they came over.

"You're all wearing black!" Maddie cried. "Oh dear, maybe I should have worn black to match."

"To be honest, Mads, I can't imagine you in black," Cerise observed.

Maddie laughed. "Indeed, indeed!" she agreed enthusiastically.

Just then, a waiter in an odd rabbit costume and red waistcoat came along. "Your orders, ladies?"

The four blinked.

"We don't have a menu," Raven said.

The waiter chuckled. "Ah, it's your first time at Wonderland's, I see. Here at Wonderland Grove, you don't have a menu — you tell us the name of something, anything — and we'll make it according to what it seems like."

"I love it!" Briar squealed. "Okay, I'll have a Green Tea, Rose, and Chocolate Martini with extra rose and sugar."

The others seemed happy.

"I will have a rhubarb-dragonsauce-chili-marshmallow-s'mores-barbecue-cracker-potato-tea cocktail," Maddie announced.

"Can you give me a Salted Caremal shake with some booze?" Raven inquired.

"Something that's called the Big Bad Wolf," Cerise said boldy.

As soon as the waiter left, the four lovely ladies slipped easily into conversation, what was going on, any news?

At last, they seemed to come to their problems.

"So, I think Hopper's cheating on me with Ginger," Briar explained. "Like, he totally ignores me and it seems like our love isn't real. Whenever Ginger comes over, I find it so annoying because I can't leave them alone for a minute!"

"Oh my GOSH, that is EXACTLY what's happening to me!" Raven exclaimed. "Dexter likes Cupid so much, I can totally tell!"

"Soul sisters!" Briar cheered.

"At least you guys only suspect your dudes of cheating, I actually saw Daring making out with Lioness!"

"Who's Lioness?"

"Uh…coworker…"

"What a sleaze!"

"What a douche!"

"He doesn't deserve you, Cerise!"

Finally, their drinks arrived, in medium-sized glass bottles with a cork stopper. A small silver label was attatched to each of their bottles with two words in elegant white cursive-

DRINK ME

"Gladly!" Cerise joked, and took a swig of her brown drink. Immediately, she jolted like she was struck by lightning. The taste was almost electric.

Raven had a sip of her own light brown drink, and smiled in satisfaction. Briar's drink was bubbly, like champagne, and very pink. Maddie's was aqua and it seemed to fumble and fume like smoke.

They enjoyed their beverages immesely. Later, they ordered some food - strawberry chocolate mousse for Briar, salted caremal cake for Raven, cherry coconut ice cream for Cerise, and a BLT for Maddie.

Soon, the four started getting a little tipsy.

"You-You know…" Briar slurred as she licked off her mousse-covered spoon. "Hopper doesn't even seem to realise that I-I hate him!"

"Oh my goooooosh!" Raven mumbled. "Yes! Same! Like, why is Cupid better than me anyway?" She sighed, taking a sip of her shake. "Curse you fringed, pink-haired s-sirens!"

"Curse you!" Briar agreed, raising her bottle. "L-Like, they're whores! Ho's! Magnetic things n' stuff…"

"Yeah, even Santa said it!" Cerise cried. "Three h-ho's…L-Lioness, and 'den Cupid and Ginger…Ho ho ho…" she ended with a hiccup.

"Who iiiiiiiis Lioness?" Maddie asked, perched on the table as she swung the pepper shaker around.

"Like, a ster-IPPER!" Cerise howled. "Such a s-slut! I saw her making out with Daring like he was an ice-cream!"

Cue stereotypical record-scratch.

"Wait, Daring's co-worker is a stripper?" Briar asked, apparantly sober now.

"Mmmm, I know…" Cerise replied, groggily. Suddenly, she straightened up, looking alert. "Wait, what?"

"You said that Daring was…OH MY GOOOOSH!" Raven shouted. "Daring's a stripper?"

"Yeah, and you guys don't tell a living soul."

The three nodded quickly.

"Tell a living soul about what?"

Four heads turned to see Reece, who was holding a jet-black drink and looking confused.

Briar gave a loud whistle. "Wow! Who's this?"

"Reece?" Cerise asked.

Briar turned to her friend. "You know him? Cerise, I'd leave Daring for this guy ANY time!" She nudged her suggestively.

"Be quiet," Cerise hissed, but Briar only giggled and took another swig of her champagne-like drink.

Reece only smiled amiably. "Hi, guys. I'm Reece."

"Raven," murmured a half-conscious Raven.

"Hello, I'm Maddie!" Maddie shouted hyperactively. Then again, she was always hyperactive.

"Bond. James Bond," Briar greeted, a little more than tipsy.

He shook their hands (well, tried to shake Raven's) and then left like nothing happened.

"You-You liiiike him…" Briar cooed, twisting a strand of dark brown hair around one finger. Cerise shook her head. "No, I'm faithful to Daring."

"Whhaaa?! Daring wasn't faithful to yoooouuuu, Cerisey," Raven pointed out as a downed another mouthful of her drink. "Why don't you pay h-him back?" She started playing with the hem of Briar's skirt.

"By having sex with Reece?" Cerise deadpanned.

"Yeeeeeesssssss!" her tablemates answered.

"Doesn't sound too bad…" she admitted, intoxicated by her Big Bad Wolf. "Do you think his…uh, junior…is bigger than Daring's?"

"Why don't you find out?" Briar replied, giggling.

Maddie and Raven cheered in agreement. "Yo! Reecey-Poo! Come over, would you?" Raven called. Reece, who was sitting alone two tables away, obidiently obliged and plopped himself down on the arm of Raven's chair.

"So, how's life?" he asked.

"Terrible," Briar, Cerise, and Raven moaned.

"Great!" said Maddie cheerfully as she sipped enthusiastically at her bottle.

"Do you think Cerise is preeeeetttttyyy?" Briar asked, stretching out the last word. Cerise turned the colour of her skirt.

"Yes?" Reece replied uncertainly.

"Say it with more confidence," Raven muttered, clucking her tongue like she was some fashion show judge.

"Yes, I think Cerise is pretty," Reece repeated, his ears turning red.

"He's bluuuuuushing!" Maddie teased, and then gave a sudden loud snort. "Do you think she's beautiful?"

Reece sighed and rubbed his temples. Although he was secretly enjoying it. Maybe. "Yes, I think Cerise is beautiful," he fumbled, practically turning into a tomato. Maddie snorted again.

"Cerise, do you think Reece is handsome?" Briar asked, nudging her friend.

"Maybe," she answered, trying (and failing) to hide her blush.

"Oh, Cerise, I'm hurt," Reece teased, holding his heart dramatically.

"You heard the guy. D'ya think he's handsome?" Briar repeated. "You know you do." She paused. "I know I do."

"Briar! You're married!" Raven scolded.

"So are you, and here you are getting wasted and flirting with Cerise's boyfriend," Briar retorted, stirring her straw in her drink. "This is a free country! I can proclaim who I think is handsome."

"Wow, four pretty girls who love me," Reece joked. "I'm flattered."

"I don't love you," Maddie answered. "I love Earl Grey. More than ANYONE!"

"She's in love with a cup of tea?"

"It's her pet mouse."

"Ah."

And then, suddenly, their night was ruined.

The large double doors that were now closed burst open and in rushed a dishevelled-looking blonde. Cerise stared and instantly buried her head in her hands. Next trailed Dexter, glasses askew; and Hopper, who was running around screaming because of some unrecongisable living thing on his head. Raven ran towards Dexter, who crashed into a table and passed out, and Briar watched unmercifully as her husband screamed for his life.

Daring, running towards his fianceé like his life was going to end (which would have made Cerise a little happier), slipped on a ham sandwich, skidded towards their table, and ended up on his knees in front of her.

"Cerise, my love!" he shouted a little too loudly, and Cerise winced. "I can explain!"