I knew one thing that I didn't want to do was tell Cody about my own gender identity. Maybe I could see how people reacted to Ashley before I made any decisions. I dressed before we walked across the hall. After some texting, we were able to determine that Woody wasn't in the room.
We went across the hall and knocked on the door. I could tell Ashley was nervous. I still wasn't ready to officially call him a girl yet. I wanted to see how everything went. He still wasn't even completely sure if he was a girl or if just liked dressing up as one. There was nothing wrong with the latter.
Cody answered the door. He looked a bit confused.
"Bailey, I thought Zack was coming over." He remarked. "Who is this girl anyway?"
Ashley looked a little scared to speak. It took a lot of courage to go out dressed like he was.
"This is Zack." I responded. "Well at the moment, this is your sister, Ashley."
"Why are you dressed like a girl?" Cody asked. Yeah, I was glad that I wasn't telling him yet. He probably would have thought I had something to do with it.
"I went to see the psychologist today." Ashley explained. He seemed to be attempting a more feminine inflection. "He thinks I might be…transgendered."
"Oh." Cody replied. "Now I remember how you used to put on Mom's makeup when we were younger. It probably would have made more sense for you to be in that pageant."
"Wait, there was a pageant?" I asked. Also did that mean Cody was in a pageant?
"It's a long story." Cody replied.
"Cody accidentally got entered in a pageant because he was trying to talk to a girl he had a crush on." Ashley told me.
"Hey, that girl was my first kiss." Cody argued.
"Anyway, Mr. Blanket wasn't sure if I am transgendered so he suggested that I dress as a girl for a few days to see how I feel." Ashley added. You know I just realized. Mr. Blanket wasn't a doctor, so he wouldn't be able to prescribe necessary estrogen pills, even though Ashley probably wasn't ready for that yet.
"Well if there's anything I can do to help, Zack, let me know." Cody replied.
"You can start by calling me Ashley." She said. I decided I was just going to do it. I had a good hunch. "Anyway, Bailey has helped me a good deal already."
"You know you seem to have done a particularly good job." Cody noted suspiciously.
"That's because I have an older sister that would come to me for help before." I answered. It wasn't a lie. Hadley actually had done that with me, though sometimes I was dressed in girl clothes myself. Mom and Dad had once gone away for the weekend and I got to spend it completely as a girl. In any case, it was a good answer and that was a good weekend.
"You know this is probably something you should talk to Mr. Moseby about." Cody suggested.
"Mr. Blanket probably already told him and Miss Tutweiller about it." Ashley pointed out.
"I understand that, but we've known Mr. Moseby for years now and I think that it would show a lot of trust if you talk to him yourself." Cody argued. "You know deep down he does care for us."
"Aww…" I remarked. Both of them looked at me. "I mean that's a good affectionate statement. I'm gonna go do some guy stuff now because this making me a little uncomfortable."
I hoped he would believe it.
"Actually, Bailey, do you think you could come talk to Mr. Moseby with me." Ashley replied. "I still feel nervous doing this stuff on my own."
I could easily play the supportive friend without revealing that I was transgender myself. I did wonder why I was still hiding. If Ashley could do it, I probably could too. Of course, I would have to reveal that I lied and my parents might find out and there was no way that I could do it. Ashley was braver than I was and she probably didn't need my help.
The two of us headed to see Mr. Moseby. I couldn't help but wonder how he would react to the news. I couldn't help but wonder if there was some sort of protocol for dealing with such things. He was at the desk.
"Hello, Mr. Moseby." Ashley greeted him. Unlike Cody, he seemed to immediately recognize who he was talking to.
"Hello, Zack." He responded. "I've been told about what you are going through and want to do whatever I can to help you."
"You can start by calling me Ashley." She responded. She seemed like she was starting to get used to the name. She also seemed like she was getting more confident.
"Well I think for the time being, it would be a good idea for to stay in the girls' cabins." Mr. Moseby declared.
"But aren't all of the girls' spots filled?" Ashley inquired. They had to be. That was why I couldn't apply as a girl.
"They were but London's roommate dropped out." He explained. Who would drop out so soon into the school year? I then realized a problem. I didn't want her to go because I felt more comfortable around her.
"Wait, we don't have to go that far." I interrupted.
"Do you have a reason why not?" He asked.
I was then hit with a few options. I could let him move Ashley. I could reveal that I was also transgendered and risk getting kicked off the boat. I wasn't sure if they could actually kick me off the boat. I then came up with a better option.
"I think that it should be Ashley's decision." I suggested. "I don't have a problem with her and the two of us are friends. We have a good thing now and I don't think that should be disrupted. Technically, we would not be breaking any rules."
"I agree with Bailey." Ashley replied. "Plus, I don't think either of us wanting London telling her father about me."
"Very well." Mr. Moseby agreed. "For the team being things will remain as they are. But they are subject to change in the future."
I was glad that for now things were going to stay the same. I did wonder if I would have to reveal the truth if the situation came up again. Maybe I would be ready by then. Maybe I could actually come out as a girl by that time.
"We should go get some dinner." I suggested. There was a good number of restaurants on the ship, but the one that stood out the most was the 24-hour pizza bar. I knew that pizza wasn't the most appealing option for healthy food, but the main way to maintain a healthy weight was moderation. Obviously, eating chocolate cake wasn't healthy, but a regular exercise regimen could lead to a high metabolism, which made it easier to eat more food. "Do you want to go to the pizza bar or should we go somewhere else?"
I hoped that she wouldn't think that her dietary habits needed to change due to being a girl. Females could eat the same things as males. Foods didn't have a different amount of fat for different people.
"Yeah, pizza sounds good." She agreed.
We headed down to the pizza bar. I wasn't sure how but she managed to develop a feminine walk pretty quickly. It took me weeks to learn how to walk like a girl. Okay, it was more like a week, but I was still pretty jealous by how fast she was learning. I then realized that I didn't need to be jealous because even if she was learning quickly, she was probably still a good deal of time away from taking estrogen of any kind.
"So should I get less pizza?" She asked.
"Well overeating really isn't good for anyone." I said. "But you don't need to eat less. The pizza is already kind of small to begin with. Just eat until you're full. Or maybe eat about five slices."
Dinner was pretty good. I only ate four slices myself. I normally got full pretty easily anyway. I did notice that they were using nondairy cheese, probably because it was supposed to be lower in fat.
One thing that I did need to work on was teaching Ashley how to eat less sloppily. Mainly, it was to make it so food didn't get mixed in with her makeup. She could definitely learn though.
"You know you're kind of a messy eater." I noted.
"I've never been good at being clean." She said. "I don't like being clean. I don't see why I suddenly have to be neater."
"Well you could be a little neater." I said. "I mean you don't have to change a lot. I'm not asking for a change in personality, but getting your clothes off the floor every now and then would be nice.
"So, what am I supposed to do with my clothes if I decide I want to be a girl?" She asked.
"You don't decide whether or not you want to be a girl." I declared. "You decide if you want to transition. Being a girl is not a choice. You either are or you are not."
"Sorry…" She remarked.
"I know I got a little carried away, but I hate it when people say that being transgender is a choice, just like how being gay is not a choice." I explained. "As for what you should do, you should probably keep some of them. You may not want to fully transition right away. I haven't been able to."
"You've gone a lot farther than I have." She pointed out.
"Well physically, but I don't know if I could spend a full two days dressed as a girl." I stated. "I'm terrified of people knowing about me. Maybe this place won't be so bad, but people can be cruel to people who are different to them and I don't know what to tell my parents."
"Do you think your parents won't love you if you tell them?" She asked.
"Maybe." I admitted. "They've always been pretty conservative."
"Well if you parents really love you, what you are won't change any of that." Ashley replied.
I was pretty sure that they loved me. I just didn't think that they would understand. The only person in my family that I ever really connected with was my sister. My dad and I did both love the Royals. We were probably the only people that loved the Royals. I just didn't know how to tell them.
"Are you going to tell your parents?" I questioned.
"Well it's not as easy to contact my dad." She said. "I'm probably going to wait a few days to tell my mom."
"So you think you're going to keep transitioning after this is over?" I asked.
"I think so." She responded. "I guess I want to see what school is like."
The following morning, we woke up and prepared for school. Ashley seemed to surprisingly already be up.
"So, is it true there are ways to make it look like I have boobs?" She asked. She was wearing a red long-sleeved tee and a black midi skirt.
"You can buy padded bras and there are also these things that you can attach to your chest." I explained. I had experimented with both when I was first transitioning.
"So, what's it like…having breasts?" She inquired, blushing a little.
"It takes a little time to get used to." I admitted. "But I like them. It feels good when I touch them."
"Damn it." Ashley said. "Can you please not say things like that?"
I blushed. I forgot that she would still be able to get an erection. Despite not having breasts, she passed as a girl pretty well.
"Do I look good?" She asked.
"You look like a girl." I answered.
"You know you could do this with me." She suggested.
"I'm not ready for that." I told her.
A few minutes later, we went to class. No one noticed at first. It was good, but I had a feeling that it wouldn't last. It was still encouraging.
"Who's the new girl?" Woody asked.
"What is she wearing?" London replied.
I couldn't help but wonder if it would be possible to get through the whole time without anyone finding out, but I didn't feel that was likely. I just hoped that Miss Tutweiller wouldn't call her out in front of the class.
I was actually surprised by what happened. Ashley actually walked up to the front of the room.
"Hello, everyone, my name is Ashley. Some of you don't know me, but those who do know me as Zack. I'm here before to announce to everyone that I am transgendered. I don't care what anyone has to say about it. I know who I am and there's nothing that anyone can say to change that. Now you can start the lesson."
"What does transgendered mean?" Woody asked.
Miss Tutweiller went into a discussion about what it meant to be transgender and I couldn't help but feel a little uncomfortable. I didn't want to say anything because people might accuse me of being transphobic, which would be very ironic.
After class, Ashley was approached by a girl named Reina. I really didn't know much about her other than she was the girl that wanted to be popular. Usually, that involved by being a bitch.
"So it seems like someone was having trouble getting girls so he decided to be one instead." She replied as her lackeys laughed with her. Ashley only smirked.
"I never had any trouble getting girls." Ashley countered. "In fact, I bet I can still get you to go out with me."
"Sorry, I don't date chicks and I definitely don't date with dicks." Reina declared.
"Well I guess you'll never know about the amazing date that I have planned for us." Ashley replied. "Just because I'm a girl now doesn't mean that I don't know what girls like."
"Are you trying to say that you know some perfect date for me?" Reina asked. "I don't believe you."
"Too bad." Ashley said before she turned her back.
"Wait." Reina told her. She turned around. "I'll go out with you, but only to prove you wrong."
Maybe it wouldn't be such a bad idea to come out. No I still wasn't ready.
So this chapter was mostly about Ashley, but the next chapter will have more Bailey in it. Please don't forget to review.