Ok so this is where my writing starts.
Hells Lingering Kiss
Chapter 11- Courage
Dear lord, Help me to have the strength and courage to live each day the right way. Amen.
I starred at the paper after I finished writing down the strange occurrences I had recently. However no matter how much I read over it or how much I rethought everything I was as clueless as I was to start with. I dropped my pencil and leaned forward on my desk. Nothing made since and it seemed like the more I saw these people the less since logic made.
Squeezing my eyes shut and thought back to the conversation with Hotori. Do you believe in God, Amu? Kept playing over and over in my head. My eyes snapped open and I stared at the paper once again glaring holes in it.
God, why the hell did I keep thinking of that? Of course he doesn't exist and if he does he was cruel and had a sick way of showing his 'love'. If there was a god where was he when people needed him? Where was he when I needed him?
Most of all where was he that night? The day Keo was murdered? In a fit of anger I crumpled the paper up and threw it in the trash.
"Nowhere that's where because God does not exist!" I yelled as loud as I could. Then I felt the warmth of tears flowing down my face. I threw myself on my bed then curled into a ball. Only then did I fully allow myself to break down.
~Time skip~
Eyes were watching me. Many different eyes staring at me with expectation clearly written in them. I turned around frightened by the eyes that seemed to peer into my soul. However I caught sight of a pair of eyes that were familiar.
I sat up in my bed sweat beading on my fore head. My head felt heavy as well as my heart. "Ikuto." I whispered when my raged breathing calmed.
His eyes were the ones I saw in my dream; there was no mistake about that. I shivered as I remembered all those eyes on me. I walked to the bathroom splashing cold water on my face. However when I looked up I almost died of a heart attack.
There in the mirror I saw not only myself but Keo as well. I knew that it wasn't really him because Keo was dead. I turned and didn't dare look at the hallucination of my dead boyfriend. I walked through where he would have been and back to my bed.
I covered my face with my blanket and squeezed my eyes shut. It was only a hallucination; he was gone forever and would never be back. I saw him die I knew the most just how dead he was. I cried again only this time I didn't fall asleep.
When the alarm clock went off I stood up groggily stumbling to the bathroom. I hesitated at looking at the mirror but forced myself to. When I saw it was clear of anything out of the ordinary I took in my appearance. My eyes were red and puffy, my hair was messy and my complexion pale.
It was only after I got ready for school that I remembered I was suspended as well as grounded. In a way I was both thankful as well as disappointed. On one hand I looked horrible and did not want to listen to the rumors spread. On the other I had nothing to do which was always bad for me.
Sitting at my desk I opened my laptop and decided to listen to music and work on the 3 page essay for history. I opened up a new document on micro word starter. I had just finished the second page when my eyes started to blur. I rubbed them and tilted my chair back out of boredom.
However when my eyes fell on the computer screen I leaned back to far and ended up on the ground. Slowly I crawled up to my desk and stared at the screen. In place of the history assignment I had just typed were large letters. (You can't run from your destiny) I slammed the laptop closed and ran downstairs and out the door.
I didn't care if I got in trouble. I could not stay inside that house alone.
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I ran stumbling and bumping into people. I didn't stop even when they yelled. I just kept running till I reached a small park. Only then did I stop bending down grasping my knees as I desperately try to catch my breath.
What the hell was happening to me? I made my way to a bench but I felt shaken and my knees wobbled. By the time I reached the bench my legs collapsed and I allowed my head to rest on the bench. I felt sick and I was scared.
I allowed my mind to go blank and soon I felt my eyes began to flutter close. I tried to fight my fatigue but failed I was just too tired.
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I felt something wet and warm on my cheek. I swiped at it only to feel fur. My eyes opened just as a tongue licked my nose. I scrunched my face up while using the back of my sleeve to wipe the slobber off.
Then I found myself staring at a dog but not just any dog it was the dog from before. My eyes widened slightly as I reached out to pat the dog's head. "Hey there fella I thought I would never see you again." He barked as if he was speaking to me.
I stood up and motioned for the dog to follow me. I didn't want to leave him here I mean someone still might call for him. I had just walked into my house when the dog started barking and growling. I tried to calm him down but he just growled worse.
My mom came down the stairs pulling her shoes on and looking alarmed. "Amu why… is there a dog in are house?" She asked cautiously while staring as if the dog would attack her at any moment. I finally got the dog to quiet down.
"I found him and I am holding him till I find his owners." I prayed she would understand and not make me throw the dog out. If he hadn't been going crazy seconds ago I was positive she would have liked him. Now she stood there in her thinking pose.
"Well alright but he is your responsibility until the owner is found and I mean it you have to feed him walk him and keep him quiet." I nodded thankful she allowed the dog to stay. "Oh and I am going to pick Ami up and then go buy groceries." I nodded and waved bye as she grabbed her bags and keys then left.
However as soon as the car pulled away the dog once again went into a barking and growling frenzy. He crouched down then ran up the stairs. I immediately followed him only to find him growling and scratching at my bedroom door. I felt a chill run down my spine as I hesitated with my hand on the door knob obviously something was wrong.
As I stood there with my hand on the door knob I felt like a girl in a scary movie. The one who goes towards the noise then gets killed in a brutal manner. However I kept reminding myself this was not a scary movie no matter how much my life felt like one this was life. My heart pounded in my ears the dogs barking and growling seemed distant though it was right next to me.
I twisted the knob slowly and once I had managed that I pushed my door open a crack. However the dog pushed through as fast as he could knocking me down in the process. I rubbed my back side and cursing under my breath. However I was once again reminded of why I had been acting weird when I heard a crashing noise.
I lifted my eyes to see Ikuto crouched on top of my dresser while the dog was growling and jumping up trying to get Ikuto. I was torn between hoping Ikuto would just leave and hoping he would tell me everything he knew. "Hey you think you could get this beast away from me." Ikuto hissed while glaring at the dog.
I snapped out of my battle in my head. Sighing I walked over to the dog and put him in my bathroom closing the door. However I made sure there was no cat lazing around first. Then I turned to find Ikuto sitting on my bed smirking.
Oh how I would love to smack him silly right now. I wasn't in the mood for his riddles and games. "What do you want Ikuto?" I asked impatiently while tapping my foot to let him know I wasn't in the mood to deal with him.
He ignored my question and his smirk didn't falter once. "Awe Amu you can't say you didn't miss me." He fake pouted but when I only glared his pout became an even bigger smirk. The word devil entered my mind but I waved it off.
Instead I decided to ignore him. Going to my desk I unpacked my folder and note books. Sitting down I looked over my homework and chose the work that would be the most time consuming. Grabbing a pencil I set to work.
However Ikuto only decided to grow even more annoying. "Hey Amu?" "Amu?" " What cha doing?" "Why are you doing homework?"
I ignored him and continued my work. However when he kept asking again while poking me I nearly snapped. I gritted my teeth and kept trying to write however Ikuto wouldn't let me he grabbed my paper looking it over. Commenting on how I had gotten problem number 3 and 8 wrong.
So I did the first thing I thought of I stabbed him with my pencil. He dropped my paper and rubbed his leg. I was hoping that would get him to leave but I was proven wrong. Instead when he looked up he smiled darkly.
"Big mistake Amu now I get to punish you." I shivered and shrank back slightly. My mind yelling get out now! But I was frozen.
He leaned forward trapping me at my desk. My body was pressed against the desk and I was unable to move. I shivered as I felt coldness of his fingers on the back of my neck. However the cold grew to heat as he stroked the small area of exposed flesh.
His fingers moved and he leaned down to the side of my head. I looked from the corners of my eyes to see him staring at me with a smirk present on his face. His blue eyes showed he enjoyed the fear he saw in my own eyes. That made me struggle to get him off my back.
However after a moment he let up and I got up from my chair. However as soon as I had I found myself now pinned to my bed. Shit! I screamed in my head as I struggled harder to get him off.
"Amu I can do this all day if I wanted to. So why don't you just except your punishment." He said clearly loving every second of this. However I only struggled more.
After all he had almost raped me last time. "Get off Ikuto!" I yelled as loud as I could. However when I tried to say it again I found myself silenced by his lips.
My eyes widened but I snapped out of my stupor and tried to turn my head away. Only this worked for him because he only moved his kisses to my neck. It burned but not in a painful way. The fact that I felt heat growing all over me made me wants to cry and smack myself.
His kisses stopped and I felt his mouth move to my ear. He licked the shell of my ear then sucked on my ear lobe. My eyes widened for that was one of my most sensitive parts. I clenched my teeth not wanting to give him the satisfaction of getting a reaction out of me.
"Your mine Amu just accepts it." He whispered in my ear before allowing his mouth to go back to my neck. My mind that was about to shut down on me. However when I closed my eyes I saw an image of Keo staring at me in disgust.
My eyes snapped open as hot tears pulled in my eyes. "P-please stop." I managed to croak out. He looked up and through my tear filled eyes I saw his eyes waver from guilt to anger.
After a moment he got off and I curled into a ball immediately. I felt horrible I was disgusting. Why had I even allowed him to just stay even after all he had done. Was I that stupid to allow someone who had almost raped me twice now to just come in my room.
I heard the closing of my Balcony door but made no move to check. Instead I laid there feeling like I was the lowest of the low. I could only lay there crying and wallowing in self-hatred. Because I had not only been stupid but in a way I had liked the feeling Ikuto gave me when he touched or kissed me.
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I was in a field of wheat again only I wasn't alone. I looked over to see Keo standing further down in the field. I ran trying to get to him however he turned and ran away. I had caught a glimpse of his face it held disgust and betrayal all over it.
I ran harder I needed to explain. "Keo wait please!" I yelled but he just kept going. As I ran however the wheat around me began to grow until I could only see the top of Keo's head.
I ran towards him though it was hard through the thick enormous wheat growing in the field. However I was thankful when I noticed he stopped. Finally I had reached him and he was in a circle that was empty of wheat. I reached out to touch his shoulder.
However he started to shake with laughter. I was going to ask what was wrong when he grabbed my wrist. He slowly turned and as he did his image morphed into someone else. It was Ikuto, I tried to pull away but couldn't.
His mouth started moving fast as if he was saying something but no words came out. It began to move faster and finally I heard something. "Mine, mine, mine, mine, mine, mine, mine, mine, mine, MINE!" As he yelled the last word his teeth grew sharp as his eyes turned into slits like a cat.
I screamed but nothing came out no sound not even a croak. Laughter that was twisted and sick sounding filed my head. Then the field of wheat disappeared and I was now strapped to a stone table. I looked around only to see a menacing twisted figure coming near.
My lips moved and a word came out on its own as if I was being controlled. "Devil."
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I sat up screaming and flailing around. I could hardly breathe. Then I noticed I was far from alone in my bed. There on the end of my bed watching was none other than the cat that always came and went mysteriously.
Usually it ignored me but this time it came up and licked my hand. Rubbing against my hand as if to say it was ok. I petted the cat as I tried to regain my breath. It mewed as if to say it was there don't be scared.
I laughed a little I felt crazy and for all I knew I probably was.
Ok so that's it for now. I would really like to hear what people think so far. If you have questions feel free to ask but I won't give away spoilers.