Prompt Three: Sakura loses her Fangirl Complex
"Sakura… Thank you."
For as long as she could remember, Sakura Haruno had always had a crush on the heartthrob known as Sasuke Uchiha. Well, okay – it was approximately for the past four or five years that she had experienced such intense hormones… But the point is, she liked the guy. She liked him a lot. Within reason, Sakura would do anything for the guy if it meant getting into a long-term, committed relationship with him. Seriously. Contrary to overexaggerated rumors, she was not so single-minded that she would throw away anything and everything to get with her man. … Er, boy. She did have her principles, y'know. Geez. … She would just throw away anything within reason if it meant she could be with her man… boy.
… Don't ask how she came to realize this so early on in her life. Just… don't. The mind of a budding hormonal teenage girl is a thing to behold. Really.
Still, it must be said that despite her intense devotion, Sakura Haruno had not had much success in getting her boy to notice and appreciate her. Okay, so maybe Sasuke-kun liked capable kunoichi, and she hadn't really had much opportunity to strut her stuff. I mean, c'mon, it's not her fault! Their first Not-a-C-Rank Mission had them up against friggin' Zabuza Momochi! And his little partner that had a powerful Kekki Genkai. She wasn't from some ancient, powerful Clan like Sasuke-kun, and she wasn't a freak like Naruto…
Okay, that was a bit mean and really not true. Sure, the idiot could be annoying with his stubborn date proposals, and sure, the guy was kinda reviled by a lot of the villagers and had some weird power going from him, but he wasn't that bad… Sakura had come to realize that much since their days in the Academy. She wasn't spiteful and derogatory toward the blond like another certain stereotype would have you believe; not since they'd become Genin and the guy had started to prove himself, anyway.
And then there was the whole Chunin Exams debacle – again, another case of being outmatched, at least in her case. They'd only been out of the Academy for like half a year or less before Kakashi-sensei got that bright idea into his head to enter three greenhorn Genin into a test that could promote them. … The odds were against them to be sure, but there was always that miniscule chance they could fumble their way to Chunin. What had Kakashi-sensei's plan been if that had happened? Sure! Let's make these wet-behind-the-ears kid soldiers take up (admittedly minor) leadership roles! That'll work out real well for everyone.
… Calm down, Sakura, Kakashi-sensei probably had very valid reasons for allowing you to test for Chunin… Same with Lord Hokage for not only allowing but approving your entry…
At any rate, it wasn't Sakura's fault that most of Team Seven's opponents had been marginally more powerful than her. Bakakashi-sensei had taught them one main thing… one! To walk up trees. Much of their training had been in teamwork, and while Sakura could appreciate that, she could tell anyone who listened that she was the weakest link on the team. As a 'Civvie ninja', Sakura had no prior training to fall back on; and when she had gone to Bakakashi-sensei about this, all he had to say was, "That's good, Sakura, keep it up!"
… While reading that perverted trash, too! Cha!
Sakura had the distinct impression that she was the third (or was that fourth?) wheel on this team. All Bakakashi-sensei cared about was getting Sasuke (and Naruto, oddly enough) up to snuff. True, Kakashi had set Naruto up with some 'lame' instructor – at least according to Naruto – but she could not and did not buy the 'coincidence' that was Master Jiraiya stumbling upon Naruto and taking him under his wing. That was too damn convenient. Too damn lucky.
Oh, and did Bakakashi-sensei even bother to foist her off on someone while he did one-on-one training with Sasuke? Nooo. What the hell was she supposed to do while her teammates trained their asses off for the Exams?! Sakura was used to being cast aside or looked over in favor of more beautiful girls, but this was ridiculous…
Now in one universe, Sakura Haruno would take this lying down and do basically nothing between the Invasion and Sasuke Uchiha's defection. In this one, however, Inner Sakura had spurred her on to take that initiative for training just a wee bit earlier… In the aforementioned timeframe just described.
With Anko Mitarashi of all people.
So basically while Naruto was off looking for Tsunade, Sakura was losing her greenhorn innocence at a respectable rate. And it even continued after Tsunade was installed as the Fifth Hokage. Yet one aspect of her old self that would just not go away was her infatuation with her beloved Sasuke-kun. Sakura could admit it to herself – she had it bad for the heartthrob.
… Until she was rejected one time too many. Theeen everybody was screwed. Not immediately, mind you, but still. After Sasuke-kun knocked her out so that he could defect from the village, Sakura finally saw the light… and oh, how everybody wished the old Sakura-chan would come back. Pretty please?
"Alright… we're all set." Shikamaru remarked as he surveyed the Sasuke Retrieval Squad one last time. Naruto, Kiba, Choji, and Neji all looked as determined as he did, and for that Shikamaru was grateful.
… But why was Sakura of all people walking up to them?
"Oh, Sakura-chan! Don't worry about Sasuke, I promise to bring him back!" Naruto proudly proclaimed as he gave the pinkette a thumbs-up.
… Shikamaru swore he saw something glint in Sakura's eyes just then. And he didn't like it.
"I know, Naruto. That's why I'm coming along. He doesn't get the chance to leave." Sakura replied in a voice that chilled the whole of the Sasuke Retrieval Squad to its core.
"S-Sakura…" Shikamaru licked his lips delicately as he considered his words carefully. "I personally handpicked these guys 'cause I believe they're the best chance we have at tracking down and recapturing Sasuke… I think your presence might…"
Shikamaru hesitated as he felt Sakura's heated fixed gaze on him.
"Might… what?"
"I-It m-might… might throw our whole strategy off. Yeah." Shikamaru winced as a small spike of Killing Intent hit him. Gosh that glare of hers was discomforting…
"It's okay. I won't get in the way, I promise."
"B-But Sakura-chan! You're not all packed like us!" Naruto babbled worriedly. Sakura only gave him a sidelong glance.
"I don't need it, Naruto. This will be short and sweet."
"O-oh… O-okay…" Naruto trailed off uncertainly, obviously not getting the drastic change in Sakura-chan's personality.
"Now let's go." Sakura said tersely, and promptly bolted out of the front gate, leaving the boys in the dust. A few seconds later, the boys hurried after her… cautiously…
Gosh this was going to be one awkward mission…
As the Sasuke Retrieval Squad (plus Sakura) pursued and encountered the members of the Sound Four, it went about as well as any mission could go if a team comprised of first and second year Genin (and a Chunin) were to go up against a team of powerhouses. … Which is to say, it wasn't going very well. First, Choji split off to deal with that Jirobo guy… Then, Neji split off to take on Kidomaru… Then Kiba got separated to deal with that Sakon guy… And of course Shikamaru stayed behind to take on the Tayuya chick.
Things really went downhill when that Kimimaro guy showed up from out of nowhere and bolted off with the pot that held Sasuke. But that was also where things began to go really, really right for a change. 'Cause you see, that was when Sakura began to deign to step in. Now, you might be thinking Kimimaro was way too strong of an opponent for Sakura-chan to take on her own… But this was not the frail, wringing-hands Sakura-chan that begged and pleaded Naruto to bring Sasuke-kun back to her. This Sakura-chan had been training under Anko Mitarashi ever since Naruto went off to fetch Tsunade. This Sakura-chan was a woman… er, girl scorned one time too many.
And most importantly… This Sakura-chan had integrated Inner Sakura into her main personality.
"I don't know why you're even bothering to try and fight me, trash… But I'll tell you what. Return home to your worthless village, and I'll spare you. It is simply not in my nature to waste my time with such a pitiful girl like you…"
In that moment, an ominous feeling went up and down Kimimaro's freaky back. He didn't know why, but he got the distinct impression that he shouldn't have said that… Hell if he knew why, though. This brat had pink hair. And wore a vivid red dress! It was impossible to take her seriously. Lord Orochimaru would severely discipline him if this fight lasted over ten seconds, because that was how insignificant the brat was to the young Kaguya. Hell, five seconds would be overkill.
But then the pinkette cracked her knuckles… loudly. At first Kimimaro could only scoff at what was obviously a case of overinflated bravado; but then she used a simple kunai to deflect the projectile finger bones when he aimed his hand at her to wipe her out, and it was only then a trickle of sweat began to form on the young Kaguya. He lifted up his other hand to shoot off two waves of finger bones… But again, one kunai was enough to keep the pinkette out of harm's way.
"Not bad for a pink-haired bitch… But let's see how you do hand-to-hand!" Kimimaro charged forward, despite that ominous feeling returning… tenfold…
Next thing the young Kaguya knew, he was propelled backwards. By a single punch. Despite the fact he had underestimated the girl's strength, it was not the "simple" punch that filled him with dread… It was that twitchy smile, closed-eyes smile.
And the way she casually strutted over to him even after landing a good punch. It was like she had complete confidence he could do nothing to harm her. The nerve…! He had been Lord Orochimaru's previous ideal choice for a host body, and this pink-haired bitch was treating him just like any pathetic underling. It seemed as though he would need to teach her that one lucky strike was far from winning a battle…
Ah, but then the pinkette's eyes reopened, and Kimimaro was completely mesmerized by the murderous, unholy fire that was contained in those orbs… He was unable to do… anything… And that was when he, Kimimaro Kaguya, began to shamelessly scream for his mommy – err… Lord Orochimaru… - as the pink-headed abomination tore him a new one and actually managed to crack some of his strong-as-titanium bones.
The worst part, however, was not that the beating was so severe that he was a quivering, bloodied pulp in a matter of minutes… The worst part was that she had not been merciful enough to just end his pitiful excuse for a life. Apparently it was his burden to atone for his sins – for indeed, Sasuke Uchiha had apparently awoken in the time Sakura was walloping on him and had run off who-knows-where, pursued by the blond Uzumaki – by living in a perpetual state of near-death.
… Or at least until he slowly bled out to death. Whichever came first, the pink-headed abomination had said. At any rate, that was the state the pinkette had left Kimimaro Kaguya in – a quivering, whining-for-Lord-Orochimaru, pitiful excuse of a shell of a man. When Gaara had shown up some time later to assist the Sasuke Retrieval Squad, he had been seen as a merciful savior because he had seen fit to put Kimimaro out of his misery.
No epic battle in a field of bones required.
Sasuke Uchiha had never felt so much relief as he hovered over his "best friend" and rival's unconscious body. It had been a battle of epic proportions, but he had won. He had earned the "right" to defect from the Hidden Leaf and begin true training that would ultimately lead him to kill Itachi. Once and for all.
Coughing up a little blood for good, dramatic measure, Sasuke shakily stood up and began to once again walk in the direction of the Land of Sound. But before he took even five steps away from Naruto, he got the distinct feeling someone was behind him. Whipping around, he witnessed a silhouette striding toward him through the thick woods surrounding the Valley of the End. Sasuke shakily pulled out three shuriken from his hip pouch and got in a defense stance as he waited for the silhouette to become clear.
… His one mistake was dropping his guard when it became clear that it was his other teammate that was here to try and bring him back. Idiots. Didn't they realize it was of the utmost vital importance that he take his revenge on Itachi?!
"Hn. The weakest link is here, too? When will you people learn?"
Just as Sasuke was about to turn around and (not limp, never limp) walk away, he heard the distinct sounds of Sakura running across the soaked ground to close the gap between them. He had been prepared to break out of a tight hug, because that's who Sakura was; a useless fangirl who never learned her lesson. … Which is why he was quite shocked (and in great agony) when he felt Sakura twist his left arm hard enough to dislocate his shoulder. Sasuke collapsed to his knees and nursed his injured appendage, but then suddenly found himself shoved flat to the ground by Sakura's foot to his back. When she dug her foot into his back sharply, Sasuke let out another scream of agony.
"Wh-What the hell?!" Sasuke yelled as he tried to look up at Sakura to discern why she was doing this. Didn't she have a thing for him?
"Oh, I'm sorry, Sasuke-kun! Did that hurt?" Sakura asked in a saccharine tone. She grabbed a hold of his right leg. "Here, let me help take your mind off that!"
Again, Sasuke howled as she bent his leg back harshly enough to make a sound that sounded suspiciously like a 'Crack!'. … Yup. That leg was broken now.
"Y-You bitch… If I can't get out of here before a real challenge actually arrives, I will end you…" True to his word, Sasuke began to call upon the Cursed Seal's power… again. Given Sakura's apparent demeanor, he didn't feel ashamed in the least to be "wasting" such a fantastic power on her.
… So why did he feel the suspiciously familiar reapplication of a certain Seal on him…?
"Nope. Sorry, Sasuke-kun, but Anko-sensei would be quite disappointed if I couldn't apply the improved Evil Sealing Method to someone like you."
Sasuke gritted his teeth painfully.
"B-But that relies on my willpower to remain active! I want to use the Cursed Seal!"
"I just said it was an improved version, didn't I?" Sakura shot back dryly. "I'm far from an expert in Seals, but between me and Anko-sensei, we found a way to make the Evil Sealing Method stronger. Kinda works like a shock collar now; you try to use the Cursed Seal, and, well… you get the idea."
To spite her, Sasuke attempted to draw on the Cursed Seal again, but he quickly found the pink-haired bitch wasn't lying…
"Does this make you feel vindicated, Sakura? Are you happy now?" At this rate he would never get vengeance on Itachi…
"Sasuke-kun, you brought this on yourself, so don't even start. I could take the fact that I'm not your ideal choice of a girlfriend… But then you refused to let me come with you, let alone promise me you would return. For that you must pay."
Sasuke let out yet another howl as Sakura broke his left leg… Shit that burned…
"That doesn't make any sense! I'm not going to swear loyalty to a village that won't help me get stronger, Sakura, so you can forget… NNGHN!" Sasuke shivered in pain as Sakura casually snapped his right arm. "WHAT ARE YOU!"
"I'm just a pretty little girl…"
Author's Note: So… Yeah, that happened. My main source of inspiration for Sakura's 'anti-quirkiness' came from Mandy of the Grim Adventures of Billy and Mandy (if you couldn't tell from that last quote). XD Her heart simply grew ten times too small after that last rejection from Sasuke. Hope you enjoyed it a little. ^^
A few of you guys offered up suggestions for the next character – Kakashi, Hinata, Black Zetsu, etc. And some of you guys really want to have the separate universes connected… I probably would attempt that under normal circumstances, but I think one character with anti-quirks is quite enough for one universe, don't you? I think one universe would literally explode if a hippy Sasuke and caffeinated Itachi were to ever occupy the same universe. XD Doesn't mean the option is completely off the table, but it does mean I won't be trying it in the near future. … Even I have my limits. Sorta. lol
So yeah, for your guys' sake I'll consider Hinata, Kakashi, or Black Zetsu next. No voting, 'cause I'll be getting to each of them eventually, but do think of who else you might want to see… 'tweaked' with. I'll be brainstorming as well. ^^