The Madness of Cadmea; or The Lunatic Couturier
SIX
"Your heart is gold,
And how am I the one,
That you've chosen to love?"
-Song by Plumb, Don't Deserve You
Jefferson had almost convinced himself that he would give up his thieving ways on the long journey back to his home village after returning from his last job after leaving Wonderland.
He'd decided to find out exactly how Cadmea was faring, so he might be able to put his worries to rest. SInce he'd thought of the possibility that she might have married, he hadn't been able to concentrate on much else, and had almost completely botched his last job as a result. He'd gotten completely off-track, distracted by memories of her brought on by Maddie's comments and not so gentle reprimands.
By the time he arrived back in the town of his childhood, he'd talked himself into believing Cadmea would have waited for him, that just perhaps, he might be able to beg her forgiveness and take her away with him to be wed and settle down with their own modest but honestly come-by tailor shop.
He arrived late in the afternoon on a cold fall day, his scruff grown out into a neatly trimmed short beard, clad in his new suit, his tell-tale hat safe in a case by his side as he observed the small changes in the roads and structures with an ache in his heart.
Picking up his lone piece of luggage, he crossed the street from his point of arrival and headed for the bustling nearby tavern to ease his thirst, gather his courage, and ask some carefully worded questions about Cadmea and her family.
Once inside the clean, family-owned structure, Jefferson settled gratefully into a small table near the bar and ordered a drink - he knew he should eat, but he was too anxious to have an appetite.
The bar matron who served him was the chatty wife of the owner, he recognized, and he casually mentioned he was a tailor looking for work as he sipped at his ale.
The older woman looked sad for a moment before brightening slightly. "Well, if it's work you be after, you've come to the wrong place - we once had two rather fine shops here, but they've been shut down for a some years now. 'Course, if you were of a mind to open a place of yer' own, you could probably make a killin'. The local folk grow tired of having to travel elsewhere for decent clothing. The stuff the tinkers bring through is so cheaply made 'tis hardly fit for feed sacks."
Jefferson had frozen after the first sentence. He finally gulped down the ale in his mouth and carefully set down the glass.
"Odd, that two such fine shops would both close their doors around the same time. May I ask if you know what happened?"
The matron sighed and shook her head, wiping her worn hands on her tidy apron. "'Tis a sad tale, indeed. First the hatter's son took off to parts unknown, took ill and died if the gossips anythin' to go by. Left behind his poor parents and a fine heritage, not to mention he was s'posed to marry the Metaxas only daughter - they was the family what owned the Clothing House here. The hatter and his wife eventually left the village and never returned. The daughter pert near lost her mind when news of the lad passing came, and tried to kill 'erself - or so it's been said."
Jefferson frowned, blinking uncertainly, his heart pounding in his ears. "This son of the hatter...he died?"
Why had the monks sent news of his death when he'd so spectacularly recovered? And Cadmea...Cadmea had tried to kill herself...?
"Aye, 'tis a shame, he were a decent lad, and a pretty one, too. Went adventurin' and caught a fever - died in a monastery in the north they say. I don't think 'is parents ever even rightly found out."
Jefferson swallowed against the panicked nausea rising in his throat. "And what became of the other shop? The owners with - with the daughter?"
"Oh, one day the lass just disappeared - most folks think she wandered into the forest and died. There was some talk of a letter left behind, but no one knows for sure. The day after she went missing, her father arranged a search party - the men were gone for a week, took dogs and everythin', but her trail ended abruptly - there was no blood, but there was no sign of the poor girl, neither. Never did find her. Her parents waited a year or so, then packed up and left the village - couldn't stand to live in the same place she'd died, I suppose. So much tragedy, just from a boy leaving a girl alone. Not to make light, but 'tis usually the other way around, eh?
Jefferson stared at the gleaming rim of his glass, lips parted, eyes burning and painfully dry. His lungs refused to accept oxygen properly, like he'd been struck a fatal blow.
"Can I get you somethin' to eat, fella? You're lookin' mighty pale for having just come in off the high road."
Jefferson summoned a small smile and shook his head, feeling numb as he fished a coin out of his purse and laid it in the woman's hand. "No, no, thank you. I must - must continue on, if there is no work here. I appreciate your time."
The matron smiled and declined her graying head before turning away.
Cadmea was dead.
The smile dropped off Jefferson's lips as if it had never been, and suddenly he picked up the glass and downed it in two gulps, before pushing back his chair, grabbing his bag, and hurrying out the doors.
The matron had spoken the truth - the shops were closed, his family's now housing a cobblers, and the Metaxas large shop now owned by a local doctor. Their home, however, was boarded up and slightly dilapidated. The roof was missing half it's fancy painted shingles, and some of the expensive windows had been broken in with back garden was overgrown and dismal, the stone bench under the tall tree shoved over and broken. It had once been a bright, lively place - but no one had moved into it, doubtless because of it's sad history. Village folk especially, were wary of such places.
Jefferson stared at the large, once lovely home, trying to recall just how long he'd been away. Had it been so long? How had everything changed so quickly?
Jefferson sat down hard in the tall grass, his bag tumbling down beside him. He looked toward the windows of Cadmea's room on the second floor, and for an instant saw her small smiling face in it as he had so many times, cheeks flushed, eyes twinkling with pleasure at seeing him approach, her small hand raised in an enthusiastic wave. He blinked, and the vision was gone.
Cadmea was gone, he'd broken her heart, and left her, and she'd died and taken all the fragile life and light and love around her with her. She'd always been so good and kind, so quick to forgive his mistakes. She'd loved him so purely, he knew, had always known, and he'd been undeserving. He'd neglected her. He'd as well as murdered her. She would never be able to forgive this...because he would never see her again.
Jefferson dropped his face into his hands, teeth ravaging his lower lip, face crumpling at the splintered pain in his chest. His breath drew in in hisses and released in raw sobs, but he found he could not weep - and the realization made him think that perhaps Maddie had been right all along.
He truly was a villain.
Jefferson left the village the next day, unsure of where he was going, simply paying for passage on a carriage and pretending to sleep so he would not be coerced into conversing with his fellow passengers. His misery hung over the vehicle like a cloud, though, and no one made much small talk.
He was jolted into unwelcome awareness eventually, when the carriage driver shook his arm hard, and announced they'd reached the end of the journey. The carriage would not be travelling any farther that night.
Jefferson's only response was to push the man out of the way, stumble to his knees in the darkness outside the carriage and empty the meager contents of his stomach into the dirt.
The hired driver dropped his bag next to his side and muttered something about 'drunken louts' before striding off into the night on bowed legs to attend to his horses.
Jefferson knelt on the ground until his head stopped spinning, and then wiped his mouth carelessly on the back of his hand. His breath hitched, the ache in his chest still so deep he could hardly breathe. Gulping air like water to stave off the panic he felt rising, he dropped his head back on his shoulders - and caught the sight of his hat case sitting on the ground beside him. His eyes widened as he stared at it, his head lifting, turning like a predator's. A haze of red settled over his vision, and then he bared his teeth and growled, narrowing his eyes and stretching out one arm to land a ferocious blow to it.
The bag flew several yards, thumping onto it's side in a stand of tall grass. Jefferson stood, muttering expletives, and shaking the sting out of his gloved fist. He stomped towards it, intent on setting his boot into the tough leather and crushing the precious item inside along with it - when suddenly he was brought to an abrupt stop by the appearance of Rumplestiltskin before him.
"Get out of my way," Jefferson bit out, lowering his head to glare into the golden eyes of the shorter male.
"And watch you wantonly destroy such a powerful magical item? Don't be foolish, my dear boy. You'll re-gret it," the maniacally grinning creature sing-songed.
Near-crippled by his pain, Jefferson none-the-less drew himself up and stared down his nose at the beast. "So is that why you're here? To keep me from crushing my own property into the dust?"
Rumplestiltskin huffed. "Believe what you wish, dearie, but someday you'll thank me; your work is hardly begun." He blinked at Jefferson slowly and hummed thoughtfully. "Why, Jefferson, is that heartbreak I smell on you? I wasn't aware you even had a heart."
Jefferson clenched his teeth at the insult, knowing he didn't really have a leg to stand on - the life he'd led this past few years hadn't exactly been tempered by any other emotion save greed.
"What makes you think you know anything about me?" Jefferson snarled, taking a threatening step forward, knowing even as he did that the dark creature before him could end him with a flick of his fingers - and perhaps that was what he wanted.
Rumplestiltskin seemed infuriatingly unmoved. He simply crossed his arms over his chest and brought a hand to his face, tapping a finger against his jaw. "Do you really think you could hide anything from me? I know your soul, portal-jumper, and the darkness it bathes in. This, what you're feeling now?" he commented with a grin, "This is simply the price of your selfishness coming due."
"It - it wasn't supposed to be like this!"
"Like what? What did you think was going to happen when you turned your back on True Love, Jefferson-lad? But there's the rub, ay? You didn't think, did you? Just went on your merry way, without a thought to the mess you left behind. Honestly, it's refreshing - I haven't seen anyone screw up this badly since - well, we won't go into that. Suffice it to say, nothing ever goes as planned, boy. You got to say goodbye to your better half, take refuge in that, at least."
Jefferson went limp, all of his anger leaving him as he found himself clutching fistfuls of his vest and shirt as if trying to ease the pain in his chest. He breathed shallowly, quickly, eyes darting around restlessly.
"I-I broke her," he finally breathed, releasing his cramped fists to run them shakily through his hair.
Rumplestiltskin's cold eyes held no pity for him. "Everything breaks eventually, lad," he quietly allowed.
Jefferson's eyes darted back to the creature and he dropped his hands to fist at his sides, swallowing and licking his lips nervously. "Bring her back."
The creature cackled at him. "You know better than to ask me for the likes of that. I can't bring anyone back from the dead," Rumplestiltskin said.
"B-but she didn't deserve what happened to her! It's my fault! I don't care what you have to do, who I must kill, what I have to steal, just bring her back, exchange me for her, I DON"T CARE! JUST DO IT!" Jefferson roared.
Rumplestiltskin only lifted a brow. "Can't. Sorry, not sorry. Speaking of, I do have a job for you - but it's dangerous. Could end up losing your head." He stifled a small smile.
Jefferson, huffing and wide-eyed, barely heard him. "Swear to me...swear to me that you can't bring her back from the dead."
Rumplestiltskin sighed, voice wheedling. "Y'know I can't."
"Swear it!" Jefferson spat, red-faced.
"I swear on my honor, I cannot bring your lady back from the dead. Happy now?"
"I don't believe you. You - you always have something hiding up your sleeve! Nothing happens that doesn't have your hand in it!"
Rumplestiltskin tilted his head. "I will tell you this true, lad - if I could bring her back from the dead,
I would - if not just to shut you up. I think you might be going a bit 'round the bend."
All at once Jefferson wilted, all the fight gone out of him. Exhausted, body and soul, he stared at the ground between his feet. Then, out of nowhere, his lips slowly parted. A shy smile peeked out, bit by bit, and then a full blown grin that stretched sharp and white from ear to ear, accompanied by a loud, unsteady laugh.
"'Around the bend!'" he repeated with tremulous joy. "That's it!" he yelled.
Rumplestiltskin lifted a brow.
Jefferson looked at him, eyes and hands thrown wide in excitement. "Don't you get it? I must be a little mad!"
"Looks like more than a little from here, dearie," the imp muttered behind a simpering smile, playing along. "Why are you suddenly claiming to be insane, lad?"
Jefferson threw his head back and laughed, but then by and by, the laugh turned into sobs - and then he was crying. At last.
He dropped his head to look at Rumplestiltskin and his eyes were red-rimmed, overflowing with fat tears, running down his lean cheeks and dripping off his jawline. His dark brows twisted with despair as he looked at the imp with a broken, struggling smile.
"I must be mad," he whispered to himself, and then to Rumplestiltskin, "It makes sense, doesn't it? No...no man in his right mind would have left her in the first place."
Silence fell then, as Jefferson stood and simply cried. His heart really did feel like it was breaking.
If this was how Cadmea had felt when he'd left her...Gods, then he wanted to die, too.
"Still not interested in the job?" Rumplestiltskin finally asked cajolingly over the crickets and other night sounds..
Jefferson slowly unclenched his jaw, absently rubbing the painful hinges with his fingers. He wiped at the wetness on his cheeks, and tried to think. He really did not have the energy to go scarpering off for the imp at present - but what else would he do? If he did not distract himself, he would find a crate of spirits and drown himself to death with the alcohol.
Perhaps if he was lucky - or unlucky - enough, he might find his doom anyway.
"Villains do not get happy endings," Maddie's voice echoed in his swirling mind. It was a terrifying reminder. She had not been threatening him, but trying to warn him. As if she'd already known what he would find if he returned home. Villains do not get happy endings...
'No,' Jefferson thought to himself, 'that they don't - but they also don't care. They don't feel.' Villains answered to no one, not even their hearts. They took what they wanted, and they did as they wished - and woe betide anyone who stood in their way.
Jefferson dropped his unsteady hand to his side again and looked up at Rumplestiltskin from beneath wet lashes - but this time his eyes were cold and hard. One more sniff, and he blinked away his agony. He smoothed his hair, and set his sore jaw. He straightened his waistcoat with an efficient tug, and resettled his leather coat upon his shoulders. He turned away to retrieve his hat case, and then walked stiffly back to the imp with a strange, fierce little smile on his face.
Rumplestiltskin thought that the smile looked feral, like a sharp-toothed fox that had cornered it's prey - and then Jefferson spoke.
"Tell me."
A/N: Hey, guys! :) There is another new chapter posted after this, so be sure to check it out. I'm sure you can tell roughly where this 'job' is headed - or can you? Don't jump the gun, a lot is going to happen in the next two chapters after these. Please let me know what you think! I try to research and get as many facts right as I can, but I'm sure some things slip. Please forgive me if I fudged any details. Thanks to all who read, commented, faved and followed. I truly appreciate every reader.