Ever wondered how spirit dreams work? Here's what Sonya found out!

27. Not Really Alone

(Sonya POV)

Returning to the classroom after my phone conversation with Mikhail was surreal. After all that had passed between us over the last few days, it felt like I had been transformed into a new woman, and I struggled to contain the glow that burst out from my aura. Thankfully the students were so wrapped up in their own business that they didn't pay any extra attention to me and I made it through my evening classes without arousing suspicion.

When lunchtime rolled around, I finally had a chance to sit quietly and begin to process everything that had happened since the Dragomir crash;

Five people had died, three royals were remembered, and one survivor was left to carry on her family name. Victor Dashkov's spy had found out about my magic, and now the prince expected me to leave my job at The Academy to work for him instead. I had revealed the secret of my magical powers to Misha, and in return he had declared his love and bonded himself to me. Avery Lazar had discovered my affair with Mikhail and I was forced to wipe her memory of the event by using compulsion. And to top it all off, my lover was now over two thousand miles away in Pennsylvania, which left me feeling off-centre and exposed.

There was so much to take in, but as I sifted through the information there was something else that niggled at my mind – a connection I should have made earlier. Suddenly, I realised what had been eluding me… How had Avery Lazar managed to resist my compulsion for so long? I'd only tried using compulsion magic a few times before but I had never met anybody strong enough to resist my will. Was it possible that Avery possessed the same kind of magic as me? I already knew that Misha's sister Catalina could read auras, so maybe there were even more people out there with similar powers?

During the remaining classes I found myself easily distracted and I constantly looked at the clock, willing the time to pass more quickly. I longed for Mikhail to be back from Court so I could tell him about my theory – it wasn't the kind of thing I felt comfortable discussing over the phone, especially when Victor might still have a spy on campus, so there was nothing I could do but wait.

When school finally finished I stayed late to plan out my lessons for the week before returning home right on curfew. I grabbed a snack then slowly began to clean up my apartment. Everywhere I looked there were reminders of Mikhail – our coffee mugs rinsed and turned upside down on the sink, the plate with blini crumbs still sitting on the kitchen table, my beautiful green dress draped over the arm of the lounge where I had left it after the banquet. I even found my knickers half-hidden under the rug on the floor and a single lace glove stuffed under a cushion – I had no idea where the other one had gotten to.

As I opened the wardrobe door to find a garment bag for my ball gown, I noticed the white bathrobe hanging neatly where Misha had left it. I reached out to stroke the soft material and couldn't resist burying my face in the collar – it still smelt of him and I breathed in the sweet, musky scent greedily. Without hesitation, I stripped my clothes off and shrugged on the robe, moving over to sit in my armchair so I could snuggle down into the warm fabric and replay our last hours together.

After he'd taken me in the shower for a third time, I realised that I needed a break. Ever since the funeral I had been obsessing over Mikhail and I thought it was probably healthy to get a piece of my own mind back – to go somewhere that was just mine. I closed my eyes and whisked myself off to a special place I hadn't visited in a long time.

The sun was shining as I picked my way down the rough stone stairs that led from the main Torma house to the private gardens at the bottom of the hill. Terraced gardens lined the path, which branched off into narrow, grassy avenues edged with rosemary and lavender, jasmine and mock orange. I passed them all, descending lower and lower until I reached a secluded courtyard surrounded by camellias and roses of every shade. I had grown up in these gardens and they had left an imprint on my soul – no matter how tired or lost I might feel, I could always find myself here. I breathed deeply, taking in the crisp, fresh air and the perfume of the roses, when I noticed a different note to the fragrance. I turned my head and froze when I saw a figure emerging from a strange haze at the far end of the garden – it was Mikhail.

At first he looked pleased to see me then his brows knotted in confusion.

'Sonya? What's going on? You can't be real – you're two thousand miles away. How are you doing this – is this one of your illusions?' he demanded, stopping a few feet away from me as if he was afraid to get too close. He clearly didn't trust what he was seeing.

'What are you doing here?' I asked the phantom in return. 'I've never invited anybody here before. This is my secret place. How did you know where to find me?'

The man looked searchingly into my eyes before speaking again. 'Sonechka?' he asked uncertainly, taking a step closer. 'I was asleep and now I'm here. Are you a dream?'

When I first saw Mikhail I had assumed he was a figment of my imagination, just like the rest of this garden in my daydream, but he seemed to have his own thoughts and reactions. Could I somehow have summoned Misha into my private thoughts?

'I'm real – you're the daydream,' I replied crossly, thinking that the whole conversation was absurd.

'I feel real enough – look,' he challenged me, stepping even closer and slowly reaching a hand out to trace the outline of my face.

His fingers felt warm, and they left a memory trail that tingled on my skin. I closed my eyes and leant my cheek into the curve of his hand, hardly believing it could be real.

'I missed you Misha,' I breathed, and suddenly his lips were on mine. It was like it had been on the balcony of the ballroom and afterwards in my apartment, only now his kisses were more bold, more certain. He knew exactly what pleased me and my body responded to his like we were moulded from the same clay.

When he finally pulled away and I opened my eyes, the haze had lifted and I could see him clearly. It was my Misha, without a doubt. Somehow he was here in my daydream, or I was in his dream. It didn't matter how – I was just glad to see him again.

'What is this place?' he asked, looking around in wonder.

Of course this was my daydream, I realised – he didn't recognise where we were, but I knew this place like the back of my hand.

'We are on the Torma Estate – this is one of my father's gardens,' I explained, slipping my fingers through his and leading him through the courtyard. 'I guess you crashed my daydream after all,' I smiled up at him as he shook his head in astonishment.

'I see you wore my favourite dress,' he eyed to the gown I was wearing. 'I thought you were perfect at the banquet, but now you're something else.' He stopped walking so he could admire me properly. I was wearing the same green gown from the banquet but I'd torn the front panel of the skirt off at the knees to allow me more freedom to move, leaving the delicate train to trail on the grass behind me. I was barefooted and wore my hair loosely over one shoulder, with a sprinkling of tiny jasmine flowers woven into my auburn locks.

'I see you've dressed up for the occasion,' I countered, with a twinkle of mischief in my eye.

Mikhail looked down at his own clothes then glanced back at me, a look of faint amusement spreading across his face.

'What on earth am I wearing?' he asked incredulously.

My imagination had done a very good job. Misha looked like he was ready for a day at the beach, dressed in a white cotton shirt with the sleeves rolled up to the elbow, unbuttoned at the front to expose his muscular chest. A pair of long, tan-coloured linen pants sat low on his hips and clung to his delicious bum in a very satisfactory manner. The only other detail was a small wooden key that hung from a thin leather strap at his neck.

'It's a nice change from your Guardian uniform, don't you think?' I asked cheekily, running my fingers across his skin, watching as his nipples hardened before slipping my hands under the back of his shirt to explore the muscles of his lower back.

'You little minx,' he laughed as he grabbed me playfully, scooping me up in his arms and kissing me without restraint.

Eventually we split apart, and when he lowered me back to the ground I led him to a garden bench that sat under an archway of red and white roses.

'So, how is Court?' I asked when we were seated.

'I've actually had a pretty good night,' he replied. 'After I booked my return flight, I spent an hour or two in the gym and then caught up with my old boss Hans Croft over lunch. As the Captain of the Royal Guard, Hans was the first person to look out for me when I arrived from Romania, and apart from you, he's the closest thing I've got to family in the US.'

I sometimes forgot that Mikhail was far from home – he always seemed so confident and self-assured but even he needed people around him to give him support.

'Hans said my old Guardian buddies have missed me but they're all surviving perfectly well without me,' he added, before pausing to take my hand. 'I've been thinking about this for a few weeks now, Sonya, but I'm wondering if I should request a permanent transfer to St. Vladimir's… so I can stay closer to you. Would that be something you'd like or am I moving a little too fast?' he asked shyly.

'There's nothing I would like better,' I answered honestly, then brought his hand up to cover the pendant on his necklace. 'Everything I have, everything I am is yours.' Tears welled in my eyes as I felt the complete freedom of sharing my secrets with the person who loved me most in the world. 'Besides,' I tried to lighten the mood, 'there's plenty of room in my apartment for two, and you can always use your quarters as a private escape if you get sick of me!'

Misha glanced from the key in his hand back to me, and I blushed at the depth of emotion in his eyes. When he sat forward in the chair I thought he was coming in for a hug, but he reached behind me and plucked two small roses from the trellis – one red and one white.

'You are my passion and my peace, Sonechka,' he twined the two stems together and tucked the blooms into my hair. 'I can't wait to get back home and start our life together.'

When Misha kissed me softly I melted into his lips and knew that there had been no happier moment in my life.

'I will need Alberta to sign my transfer request,' he interrupted the kiss, ever the organised Guardian, 'but I can get things started from this end with Hans while I'm here, and submit the rest of the paperwork as soon as I get back. My flight is booked for eleven tomorrow night so I will be home with you by 7:00am – providing there are no delays.'

My heart leapt at the realisation that it would only be one more day until Misha was here for real. My smile broadened a moment later when I caught Mikhail trying to hide a yawn behind his hand – I forgot I'd dragged him out of bed to visit my daydream. I was about to let him go back to sleep, when I suddenly remembered what I had been meaning to ask him.

'Would you mind doing something for me before you come home?' I asked, pulling back to look at him.

Mikhail nodded, raising an eyebrow to enquire what I needed.

'I think I've figured out something about my magic. I can read auras the same way your sister Catalina could, and I'm pretty sure Avery Lazar has an uncanny ability with compulsion like me too. What if there are others out there who can help me understand my powers – maybe even learn how to control them so the darkness can't affect me?' I grabbed his hands and I could see his excitement rising too. 'Could you try looking in the Public Archives to find out if there are records of other people like me?'

'That's a great idea, Sonya,' he beamed at me. 'I won't have a lot of time before I need to leave for the airport, but I'll see if I can find anything that will give us a place to start.'

He wrapped his arms around me tightly.

'Now, do you mind if I go back to sleep? I have a feeling you won't be letting me get much rest when I arrive home tomorrow,' he teased, and I grinned into his chest, already planning ways to keep him awake.

I kissed him one final time then focused on releasing him from my daydream, letting him fade into the gathering haze before I found myself sitting back at home in my armchair, wrapped in the robe that smelt of happiness and love.

Author's Note:

I always planned to have Sonya visit Mikhail in a spirit dream, but the idea to make it her first spirit dream experience was a very recent development. I thought it would be nice if they got to go into the dream as the first time for both of them. (Losing their spirit-dream-virginity together! Ha ha!)

There are a few call backs to one of Rose's first spirt dreams with Adrian (Did you like Mikhail's outfit by the way? I put lots of thought into that one) :-)

On an entirely self-centred note, I based the layout of the Torma estate on my grandparents' backyard - my grandfather built the terraces & my grandmother tended to the gardens.

And now you know the significance of the roses on the cover-page image!