With Sonya turned Strigoi, now it's time for Mikhail to pick up the pieces and get ready to go vampire hunting… in the most romantic way, of course!

Thanks for the encouraging reviews & comments – it really gives me a boost when I'm feeling uninspired :-)

35. Janus Coin

(Mikhail POV)

I spent most of the following evening thinking through my options before eventually calling Alberta to organise a car, and a few hours later Yuri and I were pulling into the front gates of St. Vladimir's Academy. As we drove slowly through the school grounds, I watched in disbelief to see pockets of students and teachers walking across campus after a full night of classes, laughing and chatting casually as if nothing had happened. Unlike the days of public mourning following the Dragomir car crash, Madam Kirova had decided it would be best for school morale if Sonya's fate remained a secret, meaning that there would be no official acknowledgement of the lives that had been lost – no opportunity for the community to remember them.

Only the Guardians seemed to be aware of the horror that had taken place in the last forty-eight hours, and the mood in the main Guardian Security Centre was grim. As I walked through the front lobby, a few of my colleagues approached me to ask about my recovery but I didn't stop to chat, no longer feeling at ease among these people. I was appalled when one younger Guardian followed me down the hallway to inform me that 'Crazy Karp' finally went over the deep end, before excitedly launching into a detailed account of the events he'd witnessed. I excused myself as quickly as I could and hurried away from him, trying to block out the jarring image of Sonya fighting her way through a group of fully trained Guardians. The boy didn't realise it yet, but there was no honour, no glory in our work. We were trained to kill monsters – monsters who used to be ordinary people just like us. People with hopes and dreams, families and lovers. There was nothing to celebrate in that.

I felt a sense of relief as I stepped through the doorway of Alberta's office, closing the door behind me and pulling up a chair by the desk to sit opposite her.

'I've made my decision,' I began when I was settled, studying my knuckles. 'I can't stay here… and I can't go back to Court.'

'So, what are your plans then?' she asked apprehensively.

'I came to see Sonya, and that's what I'm going to do,' I replied, glancing up at her.

'No, Mikhail,' Alberta paled. 'It's too dangerous. Even if you were to find her, there's no guarantee she will recognise you. It would be foolhardy for any Guardian to take on a Strigoi alone, madness to consider it in your condition,' she shook her cropped sandy-grey hair in disbelief. 'What do you hope to achieve anyway?'

'Sonya would have been horrified to know she had chosen a life of callousness and bloodshed – I have to release her from her fate. I have to kill her,' I announced with quiet resolve, eyeing the woman across from me steadily.

'And if she kills you instead?' the Captain asked incredulously, clearly unable to comprehend my decision.

'Then I won't have to live with the knowledge I let down the one person who truly needed me,' I replied with a sad smile. 'I've got a month off work and I plan to spend every minute of that time searching for her.'

There was still a look of doubt on Captain Petrov's face.

'Don't see this as some kind of suicidal mission, Alberta – think of it as my final gift to the woman I loved and lost,' I finished, hoping she would be able to understand.

The Guardian sat silently for a long time, resting her chin on her steepled fingers as she frowned across at me, her expression flickering from one emotion to another. Finally, she walked around the table and rested a hand on my arm.

'Godspeed, Mikhail. I'm sorry I can't spare any of my men to go with you, but you're welcome to take a car and anything else you need. I'll inform Hans Croft of your decision and hopefully we will meet again soon.'

'Thank you.' I stood to shake my Captain's hand, aware that this might be the last time I ever saw her, and a minute later I stepped out of the Security Centre feeling strangely unsettled. Like a Janus coin, I was stuck in two places at once, hovering between the memories of my past and thinking ahead to the uncertainties in my future.

It was nearly dawn when I collected a set of keys from the Guardian on carpark duty before heading off to the closest supply room to stock-up my bag with food, a few emergency medical supplies, and a spare silver stake. When I was finally ready to hit the road, I headed back towards the carpark but paused as I passed the Moroi Staff Accommodation wing. Maybe I could just have one last look in Sonya's apartment, perhaps take a keepsake to remember her by. I mounted the stairs slowly, hesitating at the door before using my credit card to jimmy the lock.

Everything looked basically the same as when I'd left only now there were several open boxes on the kitchen floor – somebody had already started packing Sonya's things. I felt sick at the thought of anybody else going through her treasured belongings and stooped to pick up a book from the top of one of the boxes – a collection of Klimt's paintings. I wandered over to the couch and sat down, leafing through the pages until I came to The Kiss. Studying the full-page reprint carefully, I ran my fingertips over the lines of the woman's face, remembering how I had held Sonya in this exact pose in our dream. Letting the book slip to the floor, I pressed my fingers to my eyes as the grief washed over me again and sank back onto the couch, burying my face in a cushion that still smelt of her. I must have dozed off briefly because the next thing I was aware of was the sound of keys in the lock and the front door swung open.

Two elderly Moroi entered quietly then froze inside the doorway when they noticed me. One of the newcomers was a thin man in his mid-sixties who would have been considered tall in his prime except now his back was rounded with age. His companion was a sprightly woman of a similar age, dressed simply but fashionably, and my eyes lingered on her thick mane of grey hair, streaked with a familiar shade of auburn. Sonya's parents, I realised at once. Quickly rising from the couch and retrieving the book I'd dropped on the floor, I straightened my wrinkled trousers nervously and took a few steps towards them.

'What are you doing in my daughter's apartment?' the old man challenged me in a clipped British accent, barely able to contain his anger, and he stepped in front of his wife as if to protect her from the intruder he assumed me to be.

'I…' I trailed off, not knowing how to start. I wasn't even sure if Sonya had told her parents about me yet. How was I supposed to tell them who I was, what she meant to me.

'Hush, Thomas,' the woman admonished him and advanced boldly towards me. 'I know who this is,' she concluded, holding her hands up to cradle my cheeks.

'I knew you'd be handsome,' she shook her head in admiration. 'Now come and sit down and let's all introduce ourselves,' she continued, leading me towards the kitchen table and indicating for her husband to join us.

I sat there awkwardly, avoiding the old man's suspicious glances as Mrs Karp boiled the kettle and prepared some tea. An age later we all sat together and this older version of Sonya opened her mouth to speak.

'You can call me Mariya, dear,' she offered kindly, the wrinkles around her eyes deepening as she smiled. 'And this is Thomas,' she patted the old man's arm as if he was a sulking child. 'And clearly you are the one Sonya told me about.'

'I'm Mikhail Tanner,' I replied, gripping the handle of my teacup firmly for confidence. 'There's not a lot to tell you about myself except to say that I loved your daughter more than anything in this world, and I would have given my life to protect her. I'm so sorry I wasn't here to keep her safe.' The corners of my mouth tensed and I bit the inside of my lip to hold back the emotions that were threatening to escape. We should have met under happier circumstances, but instead I had to sit here and tell Sonya's parents I was the one who failed to protect their child.

'Don't be silly, dear,' Mariya replied, patting the back of my hand. 'Sonya had her difficulties but she always knew her own mind. If she decided to do something you can't blame yourself for her choices. It just makes me happy to know that she was loved before the end.' The old woman's chin quivered slightly and her husband reached out to stroke her arm in support, unable to bring himself to speak.

'I loved her, I promise you that,' I looked from one to the other, seeing Sonya's features echoed in each of their faces. 'I still do,' I added quietly, reaching up to undo the chain around my neck and placing the diamond and ruby ring on the table between us for Sonya's parents to see.

'I was planning to ask Sonya to marry me, Mr Karp,' I continued on cautiously, unsure of how he might react to the news. Sonya had once told me her father hoped she would make an advantageous match – certainly not with a lowly Dhampir – and I didn't know if he would take my admission as a comfort or an insult. 'I would have asked for your blessing and I'd set aside all of my savings to provide for her to the very best that my means allowed.'

The old man humphed to himself before fixing me with his watery blue gaze. 'If she loved you that is more than enough for me,' he answered in a deep, raspy voice, extending his arm out to shake my hand and gripping it for a moment longer. 'I always wanted a son,' he added, his lips twitching into a faint smile.

'I always wanted a father,' I replied seriously before releasing his hand, and in that moment I realised that even though I'd lost Sonya, I'd gained a family.

'So, Mikhail. Are you staying here at St. Vladimir's or are you based elsewhere?' Mariya asked curiously.

'I'm on leave at the moment actually, due to an injury' I explained, indicating to the strapping that peeked out from beneath the collar of my shirt. 'I plan to take the month off, maybe do some travelling while I try to come to terms with what's happened,' I answered vaguely, not wanting to cause them more distress by revealing the true nature of my mission.

Thomas eyed me curiously and looked like he was about to speak but Mariya got in first.

'Well why don't you come and stay with us for a while?' the old woman suggested warmly. 'There will be no memorial for Sonya here, but we will take time to remember her in our own way and it would feel wrong to celebrate her memory without you there too.'

I hesitated, feeling I should continue after Sonya while the trail was still fresh, but I could see it would be difficult to refuse Mariya's request, and with my own mother living so far away a part of me longed for the comfort and simplicity of home.

'You'll be well looked after, dear,' she pushed on in an effort to convince me. 'Thomas is practically a druid when it comes to poultices and herbal remedies, and there's no problem my chicken soup can't solve.'

'I'd love to come,' I nodded in thanks, feeling overwhelmed at her generosity. An hour ago Mariya didn't even know my name and now she was treating me like a long-lost son. 'You live near Seattle, don't you?' I clarified. 'I'm still adjusting to this shoulder injury, but I think I could drive that far with a few rest stops.'

Thomas finally cut in to speak. 'I wouldn't hear of it,' he chastised. 'You can fly home with us today – we plan travel in the heat of the day and should arrive home by late afternoon. Our spare room is yours as long as you need it and whenever you're ready to leave we will arrange a vehicle for you then,' he concluded decisively.

'I can't thank you enough,' I looked at him with gratitude, before standing to help Mariya clear the table.

We talked a while longer but time was getting on and there were still a few things Sonya's parents had to do before our return flight. Before I left them to complete their arrangements, I took a final glance around the room, wondering what had been packed to keep; Thomas and Mariya planned to have most of Sonya's belongings donated to a charity but they were sending a few boxes of items back to the Torma Estate by courier.

'We're nearly finished in here. Is there anything you'd like to take?' Mariya asked me as she bustled past with an armload of books, and I paused indecisively before moving to the wardrobe to find the gift I'd bought for Sonya nearly a month ago. Unzipping the storage bag for a quick glimpse of the ball gown, I heard an aah from behind me and Sonya's mother came up to inspect the garment.

'It's beautiful,' she breathed, reaching out to stroke the delicate fabric. 'I can just see Sonya in it – you two would have made such a handsome couple,' she glanced up at me almost cheekily, before zipping the bag and returning it to me.

On my way to the door I added the Klimt book to my bundle of treasures, along with one of Sonya's favourite scarves that always brought out the flush in her cheeks and the rich warmth of her hair. Promising to meet the Karps at their guest quarters in an hour, I tucked the prized mementos into my bag and headed out for some fresh air, wandering aimlessly around campus until I had the great misfortune of bumping into the one person I never wanted to see again.

'Guardian Tanner, what a surprise to see you here,' Victor Dashkov appeared more frail than I remembered him, and he leant heavily on his cane as he stood in the shadow of St. Vladimir's statue.

'And yet I'm not surprised to see you here, Prince Dashkov,' I replied coldly.' If it hadn't been for this man's selfishness and scheming, Sonya might be walking beside me right now, talking and smiling and safe.'

'I'm only here because I was alerted that my beloved Goddaughter, Vasilisa, has gone missing,' the prince defended himself.

'Rumour has it that Princess Vasilisa ran away from The Academy,' I challenged him. 'Why do you think she might have done that?'

'Teenagers are notoriously fickle, don't you think?' Victor countered innocently. 'And poor Vasilisa has been through so much recently it's only natural she'd want to let off a bit of steam.' His explanation was so convincing I knew nobody would ever believe he was the predator who'd frightened the Princess away.

'But I'm not too worried yet,' he continued. 'I've got my people searching for the child and I'm sure she will turn up soon enough. Even so, I wouldn't count this as my most fortunate week. Between the inconvenience of Vasilisa's escape and the unfortunate – and frankly abhorrent – lifestyle choice made by Miss Karp, it seems that we have each lost something we prized.'

I bristled with anger but held myself back from the urge to thump his smug face into the ground. At some point I wanted to return to my position as a Guardian, and that wasn't going to happen if I murdered a royal in cold blood.

'Never mind, Guardian Tanner,' the prince responded to my stormy expression by giving my arm a demeaning pat. 'At least you still have your health,' and he threw me a sly wink before meandering off in the direction of the Royal Wing.

If only he'd been here when Sonya turned Strigoi, I thought maliciously, then forced myself to take a step back. Victor Dashkov might be a complete bastard but in the end he was a terminally ill man and the only people who had the power to save him were far away from here. I turned from the stooped figure that shuffled away from me and dismissed him from my mind completely – I wouldn't waste another second of my life on that man.

Author's Note:

This chapter ties up a few loose ends for Mikhail as he distances himself from his old life and looks to what is ahead (Janus Coin – thank you Warehouse 13/Ancient Roman Empire for the reference!)

It was such a pleasure to write the scene with Sonya's parents – they are kind of an extreme version of my mum & dad (Mum is over-confident & very loving but highly inappropriate at times, while Dad is more reserved in temperament but equally generous once you get through to him). I just wanted to give Mikhail some kind of life-line so he wasn't wallowing in hatred and self-loathing for the next few chapters!

Also interesting to give some closure to Mikhail & Victor's stormy relationship & see how the loss of Sonya & Vasilisa affected his warped mind.