Out of all the hugs she received after waking up in the cryo pod, Moira's was the tightest. She could be a very touchy woman, matching her affection and appreciation for the work Shiloh did on her book. Work that Shiloh planned on picking up again to improve the manual.
"Who are your friends?" Moira smiled at the ragtag group behind Shiloh.
"Former slaves I freed. The Red Lights are crippled if not gone."
"Oh that's nice to hear! Would you like to trade for some food for your group?"
"Absolutely."
The group was able to trade enough with Moira for enough caps to buy the whole group a hearty meal. The man Shiloh had talked to before, David, was already making plans for the group to move on and find work in another settlement. Shiloh left them there, as they were able to grab enough sleeping bags from the Red Lights to be comfortable for the journey.
After getting intel and more location points from the group, she bid them farewell and rejoined Moira in her home. She was surprised to see the same bodyguard standing against the wall from 12 years ago, "Hey Randall."
"Hey kid," he nodded as if she had been here yesterday.
"Randall's still around?" she asked Moira as the two women sat at her workbench.
Moira giggled, "Randy's taken a liking to me, I think." Shiloh raised an eyebrow. Guess Moira wasn't a girl to the merc any longer. She changed the subject, asking about what Moira had been up to. "Lots of trading, a little bit of writing. Hard to get too much done without my research assistant. Nobody seems to want to work with me," she sighed.
Shiloh smiled, looking at the paperwork scattered across Moira's desk, "Let me know how I can help."
"Oh, I was hoping you'd say that!"
Two hours and five assignments later, Shiloh was exhausted. She had just enough time to meet Harden Simms, Megaton's new mayor and sheriff, and his wife Maggie for dinner. They caught up a little, Maggie giving her gossip she got from her adoptive father Billy's experiences in the bar. Shiloh specifically avoided Moriarty's, not wanting to acknowledge that scumbag if she could help it.
Harden gave her the spare key to her house and she took the long route, taking in the sights. Megaton hadn't changed one bit. Perhaps a bit more crowded. The place was long overdue for an expansion. The bomb had long ago been scrapped for parts and the Children moved out, undoubtedly her handiwork. She tried not to think about that too hard.
Jericho's house was dark and quiet as she passed it. Harden told her nobody bought the place yet because they didn't want to deal with all the repairs. Shiloh sighed and turned away from the home, heading toward hers.
She remembered Jericho fondly, one of the few people that would. The former raider was strong and tough, her first companion outside of Vault 101 and he was perfect. He took her stormy nature in stride and didn't ask questions. They had the perfect partnership. Unfortunately, he was also the first companion she'd lost. Age caught up with him and an older man couldn't handle radscorpion venom like a younger man could. She didn't know what to do when he died.
Despite spending months with him trying to not care about anything in the world, she cried and cried like a child the nights after he died. It was a while before she could take on another companion.
Shiloh frowned. That one died too.
She opened the door to the house, shaking off the dust from the mattress and setting her bag down. She weighed her options. Head back to the Citadel or straight for Rivet City? In total, it was almost a week since she was gone. She wondered if she should stay away longer, just to be petty.
Rubbing her eyes, she groaned. She was a goddamned adult. She could handle rejection. Only this wasn't her life on the line, it was Madison Li's. Somehow, some way, she would convince Maxson to understand.
She sighed into the silence. Things just could never be simple for her. She had to go and... have feelings for not only an Elder, but the Elder. Probably the most complicated and frustrating person to have feelings for in the world. Harkness was easier, even if he was embarrassed by the age difference and consumed by his own workload. Butch had been the easiest. They could be two young adults exploring the wasteland and each other. They had a strange codependency. Perhaps that's why it didn't work out.
She wondered what would happen if she just asked him. If she just pressed him to the nearest wall and asked him if he wanted her to be his. That's how things had gone down with Butch after all. None of that subtle, slowness like with Harkness. She couldn't afford that in this world.
Then, a thought hit her out of the blue, as her thoughts often do. What exactly going steady with Arthur Maxson would mean. Holy shit. She sat up, wide eyed. There's no way that the other elders weren't expecting children. There was no way, absolutely no way she would ever be a candidate for that. Physically, there was nothing wrong with her aside from the radiation that everyone else had, but...there were a lot of reasons she would never measure up to that. Did she even want that? She'd been running around focused on surviving and saving people that she hadn't imagined ever bearing children. The thought scared her beyond measure.
No.
No, things with Maxson couldn't continue any longer. Not when that was a factor. She just couldn't be the things he would want. Or the things the western elders would want.
She felt sick and sad, knowing she would need to head straight for the Citadel. She couldn't put this off any longer.
-0-
Shiloh stumbled across the rocky path by the water's edge. It wasn't quite beach, and there were no mirelurks about, but there certainly was danger.
She supposed nothing she'd done in the Capital Wasteland came without retaliation, and some Red Light stragglers got a hold of her description somehow. Mercenaries were one thing. They could usually be talked down or out of their hunt if she was smooth enough. Revenge-bound slavers? Well those were a whole 'nother level.
She'd managed to finish them off, despite the ambush they placed on her as soon as she was near the Irradiated Metro. She'd taken the long way home, planning to arrive back four days after her dinner with Harden and Maggie. It was a mix of dread at having to break things off with Maxson and her own curiosity to see if the area was still infested with feral ghouls. No ferals in sight, but she was met with five thugs in slaver gear carrying hunting rifles. She quickly assessed that they were the pump action types, that were cheap and abundant in the wasteland. It made their shots slower and she was able to dodge with ease, picking them off one by one from behind a car. When the fire fight was over, Shiloh slumped against the vehicle, grimacing at the bullet wound in her calf. She couldn't see an exit wound. Shit.
Limping, she sifted through the bodies, finding naught but a couple of bottle caps and some ammo she could pawn off later. The hunting rifles were too poor of a quality to be worth carrying back to the Citadel.
She managed to limp up to the fortress just as the sun began setting. She was shaking now with effort, feeling the bullet in her leg with every step. She couldn't tell how much under the armor Nora'd given her, but she knew she was bleeding a lot from how wet her pants leg felt. Mix that with a diet of brahmin meat and only the water she could carry after a week, she was starting to wobble on her feet. The guards straightened in alarm as she limped toward them.
"Sentinel," one started but she shook her head.
"Don't freak out. I just need help to the medical bay."
"Of course, ma'am," moving from his position near the sentry bot, the guard called over a man clad in standard combat armor to help her inside.
She had to pause a few times on her way across the courtyard. Each time, the initiate helping her asked if she was alright and she couldn't muster the energy to reply to him. She was shaking visibly now, trying her damndest to stay awake so she wouldn't need to be carried down to the B ring like a sack of bloody potatoes. Plus, she wouldn't wish anyone to carry her around in her heavy armor.
Sawbones met her when they reached the medbay, saying something loud and probably horrendous but she was too out to of it to decipher what he was saying. Numbly, she allowed the initiate to help her onto the gurney and she began to remove her armor. The clasps were frustrating, but she managed them open, dropping the pieces on the floor until she was only clad in her sweaty and bloody Brotherhood fatigues.
She spared a weak glance towards the initiate before unzipping the uniform. The man seemed to get the message, turning his back on her and standing outside the room by the door. She pulled the uniform off, now clad in a sweaty t-shirt and pants in tight material. She never went on missions without at least two layers of clothing under her armor, remembering cold nights shivering without a campfire to draw feral ghouls.
The wound was certainly bloody. She couldn't tell how bad it was. Trutfully, just looking at it was making her dizzy. Cade took this moment to enter the room in a rush, taking one look at her before putting on his doctor face. He turned to what Shiloh assumed was a nurse beside him, "Two bags of O-Negative and a bullet kit. Stat." The nurse nodded and left as Cade approached, taking a pair of scissors from a drawer.
She weakly leaned back on the gurney-turned-bed as he cut her pants up from the ankle to right above the wound on her calf. He was fixated on examining the wound, but she knew he was waiting for an explanation, "Got ambushed by a group of slavers seeking revenge on my way back. Hunting rifles, .38mm rounds."
"Revenge?"
"I might have helped release all their slaves and burned down their slavery ring. And killed every member I could find." It might have been brutal by Cade's standards, but she held no regrets at what she'd done. First off, it wasn't the first or even the tenth time she'd done that. Second, you chose your actions out in the wasteland and you paid the consequences if you wanted to do horrible things. People like Cade might not appreciate her brand of justice, but it was black and white to her.
He sighed, but didn't say anything to her in response. She wondered if it was because he knew he was wasting his words, but it was most likely because she far outranked him now and hadn't given him permission to be frank with her. She might give him that permission eventually, preferring that he didn't hold his tongue with her.
She stared at the ceiling as Sawbones rattled on encouraging words and the nurse returned to Cade's side. He warned her beforehand, but it wasn't something she could really prepare herself for. Morphine and any sort of painkiller was nearly nonexistent in the wasteland after 200 years of people abusing them for highs. The best he could do was a cleansing stimpak and a hope that she would pass out as he dug out the bullet. She didn't scream, as much as she wanted to, but she did pass out.
Her nails were still dug into the fabric of the gurney when she finally woke up ten hours later. It was early in the morning now, just in time for most of the Citadel to wake up and get to work. Sawbones loudly informed her that the bullet hadn't shattered her leg bone, but it did do a bit of muscle damage and she would need to avoid using her leg for a week or two. He helpfully provided her a pair of crutches and she frowned.
Sawbones floated outside as she examined the crutches. She swung her aching leg over the side of the gurney and tested out the crutches with her weight. She lifted her head when she heard the reprogrammed Mr. Gutsy salute outside her room. Of course it had to be Maxson visiting her. She swallowed, wondering if it was appropriate to break things off with him in a medical room in front of Sawbones.
Knowing how Maxson felt about Sawbones, she thought that might make things worse.
"IS THERE ANYTHING I CAN DO FOR YOU ELDER MAXSON?"
"Er, no, Sawbones. That will be all."
"DUTIFULLY SIR I WILL KEEP GUARD."
Both Shiloh and Maxson grimaced as Sawbones floated out again to stand guard and possibly harass passerby for check ups. Still halfway off the gurney, Shiloh looked at Maxson awkwardly. Of course, they hadn't spoken since their exchange before she left. And she hadn't bothered sending any word or updates to the Brotherhood in the almost week-and-a-half she was gone. She rolled her shoulders, feeling them pop from moving after such a long sleep, waiting for him to speak first.
He did. "You storm out of here and come back a week later dying from blood loss."
Shiloh played with the mark on her arm where the IV needle used to be, "I wasn't dying."
"The scared initiate who helped you down here certainly thought you were."
"He went to you?"
"Straight to me."
Shiloh sighed, knowing that the Brotherhood likely had an inkling of what was going on between the Elder and the Sentinel. She should just rip off the bandage, end it now, but seeing him stand there disappointed with his arms crossed, she couldn't.
There were so many hard decisions she'd made in her life. She'd literally chosen to throw away her life for her father's project and that decision was easier than the one before her now. He looked angry and tired, and it hurt that she knew she was the reason.
"I didn't get shot being reckless. I was ambushed."
The Elder persona dropped a little, "I know. And I can't stop you. But you can't crawl into my Citadel trailing blood after you and expect me to be okay with that."
Shit. She couldn't look him in the eye anymore, turning to look at the wall. He cares. Trying to keep her voice steady, she spoke, "After storming out of here in anger." Suddenly, he approached her, placing his hands on her hips to steady her. She left the crutches by the wall, not needing them now. She breathed out, "Maxson…"
"I don't know what we are. But I know you're my Sentinel. That's not just a subordinate position. You and I have to see eye to eye on everything. We need to be on the same level. And," one of his hands moved up her back to play with her hair, "you can't look at me with contempt and then come back bleeding."
She reached up to play with the lapels of his jacket, mindful of her bad leg, "Not contempt."
"Might as well have been," he leaned forward, his breath on her lips.
She wanted to bring up the conversation again, but now was not the time. Her wants were a bit eclipsed by how much she wanted Maxson, "Stop teasing, Arthur."
"Time for that later," her murmured before kissing her. She sighed into it, gripping his arms tightly. Damn her leg, she wanted him to slam her against the wall, even if it would hurt her tired body. She couldn't imagine ending things with him now. How could she have even toyed with the idea?
Reaching up, she wrapped her arms around his neck as he lifted her back onto the gurney. They didn't break apart until they heard a clatter from the doorway. They both turned to see the nurse who worked with Cade looking like someone just slapped her. She paled, still staring until Shiloh cleared her throat. Picking up the clipboard she'd dropped, she finally spoke, "Sir, Knight-Captain Cade asked me to find you before the conference in the Great Hall."
He didn't look at her, his blue eyes instead looking at the wall above Shiloh, "I'm on my way, scribe."
The nurse flushed, awkwardly backing out of the room. Maxson grew serious, slowly straightening himself. He didn't seem embarrassed, only like he was lost in thought. Shiloh moved a little closer to him, "Hey, what is it?"
"Just a few unpleasant meetings coming up. A few unpleasant decisions."
"You can tell me, Arthur," but he backed away, distancing himself.
"Nothing you need to concern yourself with, right now. If you're still around, I'll call for you when I have some free time tonight."
So he was definitely still sore with her. She wouldn't apologize for being passionate about Madison Li's freedom, and she would continue trying to convince him, but she would try to have more of a professional conversation with him. So long as they tried to keep their hands off of each other.
-0-
Hours later, Maxson was still in the Great Hall. He was probably buried in paperwork and she wouldn't bother him when he had enough on his plate. She was a little embarrassed to use the crutches, but had no other choice if she wanted to reach the mess hall. The room was small by Brotherhood standards, but more comfortable than the mess hall on the Prydwen.
Sitting at a table with a plate of warm food, Shiloh was surprised when a stunning woman sat across from her. She looked like she belonged in a club in Goodneighbor instead of the Citadel.
"You must be Shiloh. I'm Giovanna, Arthur Maxson's fiancee."