"What do you mean, she left?" Bella stood with her mouth agape, looking at Carlisle, who didn't move.

"She left because I couldn't give her what she needed anymore."

"You…," she didn't know what to say to that. "You two were the parents! You were the one thing that held this family together! How could you let her go? I know you changed her because she was your mate!"
Had she been the reason? Had this… fight which was going on because of her put an end to a marriage which was supposed to live forever?

"We. Are. No. Family," he answered slowly, pronouncing every word correctly.

Alice next to Bella flinched and Jasper stepped forward. "Carlisle… don't."

"We are not! Bella, we are… we were a coven, no matter how much we wanted it to be the real deal. A family, with parents and kids and a house,…" he spat, disgust shown on his features, waving his hand around the room "… fitting decor and money as much as we liked. It's not the way vampires live normally. I should have known it wasn't going to work."

He had come closer as he looked around the room. Standing directly in front of her now. She grabbed the crutches in a death grip, but she wasn't going to show him what the words were doing to her. Not now. She was surprised by his outburst. Never had she seen Carlisle looking so completely matching his humanly age. His hair wasn't smoothed back anymore but was tangled wildly and his eyes were so outraged, she had never seen him like this before.

"I can't offer you what you want! You wanted to be a part of this family, this supernatural allegiance, but it's not there anymore. Esme, Rosalie and Emmett will not come back and Edward is gone, too. Maybe Alice and Jasper will stay, but it's not the charade of a family anymore."

Bellas heart jumped in her chest. He was standing so close again, she could hardly breath. It wasn't until he brought a hand up to her face, that she noticed she was crying. But she wasn't crying because of what he had said or who had left, but for his loss. The pain in his voice had shaken her to the very core. The beautiful gold in his eyes burning into her heart like a branding iron.
He wiped away the tears which were rolling down her face and her stomach made a flip. Without a second thought, she grabbed the collar of his shirt and pulled him to her. She must have gotten him off guard, because he stumbled forward and his mouth came crashing down on hers.

Carlisle inhaled a sharp breath, when her soft lips met his cold ones. His feelings were all over the place. Edward had left her and he could finally claim what was, for all that he understood, his real mate. But could he? She was only human, she didn't need to be with him as it was and if he didn't act on his feelings, he could let her live a happy life without the sorrow he already had put himself and everyone else through. At least that was what he thought before she had grabbed him.
He didn't stop the kiss. He couldn't. She pressed her body against his and all he could do was to put his arms around her, pulling her closer still.

It didn't take long for Bella to open her eyes and jump backwards with a feeble sound of surprise. What had she just done? Carlisle was watching her with an unreadable look on his face. She spun around, but Alice and Jasper were gone. With trembling hands she grabbed the crutches once more, then settled on closing her eyes. She didn't know what to do. What was going on? How could she scold him for letting Esme go, when she didn't feel anything about Edwards second abandonment. Hell, she had just kissed him!

"Are you hungry?" Carlisle seemed to be back in daddy mode again. His gentle eyes examined her cautiously, but he was smiling politely when he walked by.

"I… no, thanks."

"Do you want me to get Alice, so she can drive you home?"

"No!" She hadn't meant to shout, but she had. He stared at her then.

"Carlisle,…" she said, softer this time.

He couldn't help the warm shudder that went through his body by hearing his name from her lips.
"Yes?"

She sighed and shook her head slowly. "Can I just go up? Have a bit of peace?"

"Of course."

She turned around and made her way to the stairs. Her mind was racing. How could he not say anything about what just happened?
She had made it worse. But hadn't he kissed her at the car? Had he? She wasn't sure about that. Maybe it was her weird mind that made things up. But wasn't it his voice calling to her in her dreams?

"May I help?" He stood next to her, when she reached the first step and grabbed the crutches out of her hands, after she had fumbled to hold the handrail and two crutches at once.

She nodded and made her way up the stairs.
"Thank you."

"Not for this," he answered smiling.

"For saving me, I mean."

His smile faltered and she was sure she saw his eyes darken for a moment. Then he straightened his features again and gave her a curt nod, before he turned around and left.
Bella slowly limped around the hallway, looking at the large wooden cross and the pictures hanging on the walls. She didn't know where to go and she knew everyone was listening to her footsteps. Damn vampire senses!
For a moment she decided on Edwards room, but when she opened the door and looked into the bright room with the large window front, the guilt came crashing back. How long would it take him to run to the Denalis? She sighed and closed the door. Turning around she stilled in her movements, looking at the door next to her. Could she use Carlisles office? She hesitated and lingered with her hand on the handle for a moment.

Then Alice poked her head out of the door at the end of the hallway. "He doesn't mind, Bella. Just choose a book and make yourself at home."
With that the door was closed again and Bella could've sworn she heared a giggle.

Why the fuck not? She pushed through and found herself standing in a pleasantly dark room, so very different from the rest of the house. Dark wooden shelves were aranged around the room, filled with books of every kind. Thick leather volumes and paperbacks and large ones who seemed to contain any kind of wisdom from medicine to maps of the world. In front of the curtained window front stood a large wooden desk and to her right a dark leather sofa. Smiling, she took a step and sat down on the soft furniture.
How would this all work out? She didn't know. She only knew she wasn't going to loose everyone this time and that made her feel very much at home.