Yoo I'd like to thank CoteDeMichael for following~ omg that last episode thoughhh ahhhh!

I also realized I haven't written about Ellen and Jo at all in this fic lol oh well :/ anyway, reviews (even faving/following) inspire me to write~

This is my interpretation of "Dark Side of the Moon"

I do not own Supernatural

They soon managed to find a hotel room, and Castiel decided to continue on his search for God after their encounter with the Trickster. Well, he was actually Gabriel now, wasn't he?

Wow. An archangel, working with them. That ought to be interesting.

He wasn't sure how, but his sister somehow convinced the angel to help them. He had his suspicions when she came out of the warehouse with a red face and a stuttering mess. It was obvious she liked the angel.

Dean wasn't sure how he thought about that, but he decided to brush it off for now.

Meanwhile, when he awoke, he rummaged his hand under his pillow, only to find that his gun was gone. He normally slept with his hand under his pillow, in case something tried to attack him (or his sister) in his sleep, he could quickdraw his gun and dispatch any enemy. Yet, now that was impossible.

"Looking for this?" Already wide awake, Dean shot up to find a strange man in their hotel room. The man took the cartridge out and tossed the gun to the side as Dean turned to see how his sister was doing. She had a gun pointed to her head, and she looked scared. Her eyes wide and hands to her head, this irked him to no end. Who had the right to barge into their motel room like this?

Dean tried to smile. "Mornin."

"Shut up. Hands where I can see 'em." The man said, gesturing with his own gun.

Finally, Dean recognized him as he stood and raised his own hands up. "Wait, you're Roy, aren't you? Which makes you… Walt. Hiya, Walt."

The strange men sighed, and removed their masks. "Well, is it just me, or do you two seem a tad upset?" Dean said, trying to take ahold of the situation.

Walt turned to Sam, aiming the gun on her. She sunk back into the bed, as if trying to shrink. "You think you can just flip the switch on the apocalypse and turn away, Sam?"

Sam paled. "Who told you that?"

"We ain't the only hunters after you." He cocked his gun. "See you in the next life."

Dean was just about to jump to her side, or at least in the way of the gun, but Sam started to protest. "W-wait, hold on. Hear me out. I can explain! Please."

Sam looked to her brother with a glance of reassurance, and a second later she was gone. Walt had shot her, and just like that, Dean was alone. He jumped to go to her side, try to bring her back. However, he was stopped when Roy demanded, "Stay the hell down."

"Shoot 'im." Walt said.

Dean felt hot tears start to fall. His sister was dead. This wasn't really supposed to happen, right? They weren't really supposed to die, they had to stop the apocalypse together.

However, Roy was hesitant to shoot Dean.

"Go ahead, Roy, do it. But I'm going warn you, when I come back I'm going to be pissed. C'mon! Let's get this show on the road." Dean encouraged.

With one final look at Sam's body, Sam's dead body, he felt shattering pain in his chest and he soon blacked out.

When Dean awoke, he never expected to see a child-version of his sister, looking at him with eyes sparkling with excitement.

Dean already registered that it was night, and he had been sleeping in his car.

She was holding a crate of fireworks. "Sammy?" Dean asked.

She grinned. "Come on, let's go."

Weird dream.

They went out to a ledge, and she put out a couple fireworks. "Got a lighter?"

He checked his pockets, and indeed found an old lighter he hadn't seen in years. "Fire 'em up." She said. Dean knelt down to light Sam's firework, then his own. They go off, red sparks scattering in the sky.

Dean smiled, ruffling Sam's hair. "I remember this! Fourth of July, 1996." She looked up to him. Dean noticed how happy she looked. Just plain, innocently happy. It'd been awhile since he'd seen her like this.

"Dad would never let us do anything like this. Thanks, Dean. This is great."

Then, she hugged him.

At first, he was startled. However, he immediately recuperated the hug, kneeling down to her height and engulfing her in his arms. Then, Sam pulled away. She moved to light the rest of the fireworks, retreating for cover by Dean. "Fire in the hole!" She cried, and the fireworks exploded.

She darted out, laughing, dancing underneath the sparks. She's happy, so Dean's happy.

Explosions, especially loud explosions.

"I can explain! Please."

Suddenly, he's back in the clearing, but Sam is now gone. It's just him and the Impala. He went back over to his car, and the radio comes on very staticy. It was Castiel, and he gave a hint as to how he would find Sam in this heaven. He had to follow the road.

He eventually found her, sitting on the floor in a rusty motel room. He hung outside to watch from the window, to see that it was indeed his Samantha, sitting with a teenage Dean.

He remembered having to learn to cook, making a huge mess in the kitchen in order to make a small cupcake for her with the leftover batter he salvaged from the mess. He did her hair earlier in the morning, and with a grin he saw that she had the braid still in.

Dean decided to come into the room when his teenage self left. "Dean? What are you doing in my dream?" She asked.

He shrugged, and they decided to speak outside. After an explanation, all Sam could say was, "Heaven."

"Yup."

She scoffed. "Ok, how are we in heaven?"

"All that clean living, I guess."

She shook her head. "No, no. Okay. You… I get, sure. But me? Maybe you haven't noticed, but I've done a few things?"

There she goes with the demon blood talk again. "You thought you were doing the right thing." Dean reassured.

She seemed determined against that reasoning. "Last I checked, it wasn't the road to heaven that was paved with good intentions."

Well, she certainly didn't belong in hell. Dean's already been there, and he's sure that someone as sweet as her doesn't belong in such a terrible place. "Yeah, well, if this is the Skymall it sucks. I mean, where's the triplets and the latex, you know? C'mon, a guy has needs."

Sam looked back at the motel room. Younger Dean was still in there, reading her favorite story aloud to nobody. "You know, when you bite the dust, they say life flashes before your eyes."

"Your point?"

"This motel room is one of my memories."

"When I woke up, I woke up in one of my fourth of July we burned down that field?"

Sam grinned at the memory. "Yeah. Maybe that's what heaven is: a place where you relive your greatest hits."

"So… this is one of yours?" Dean asked, gesturing to the motel room.

"Yeah. It had been a real bad day, though you did your best to make me feel better. It was my birthday, you know? You worked to make me feel special."

Suddenly, thunder boomed and the lights in the motel room turn on and off. "I don't remember this." She stated offhandedly.

"Hey. We should, uh…" Dean looked to the Impala parked nearby.

"Definitely."

They hurried to the Impala, the ground shaking so they ended up stumbling on their way. Dean turned on the radio to only hear static, but he searched through the stations and banged at it in frustration. "What are you doing?" Sam asked.

"Hush.." He banged at the radio again.

"You've completely lost your mind." Sam said exasperatedly.

"Cas!"

"I can hear you, Dean."

It wasn't very great reception, but his voice came through.

He told them that they had to go find Joshua, and avoid Zachariah. Zachariah wanted them to return to their bodies so they could fulfill their role in destiny, but he explained that if they went to Joshua, perhaps they could hear what God himself has to say about everything.

Dean looked into the rearview mirror, but the road had disappeared.

They went back into the motel room to find any clues, and found a small hot-wheels car by a walk-in closet. Sam suggested the go in, and when they entered, Dean's jacked disappeared while Sam was back in her normal hunter clothes, her braid gone as well, much to Dean's disappointment.

"Wait a minute, I know where we are."

"Where?" Sam questioned.

"We're home."

"Dean…"

They both turned to find their mother. She was young and beautiful.

They stared at their mother in shock, not knowing what to do.

Soon after, they awkwardly moved into the kitchen, and Dean sat at the table as their mother poured him milk. "You want crust off?" Mary asked him, moving to grab the sandwich originally placed in front of him.

"Yeah, I'd love that." Dean answered.

"M-mom?" Sam tried.

Still, no response.

"I guess this is not your memory, Samantha. Sorry." Dean said. Truly, he was sorry, but she was just a baby at this point in time. Dean could see that she was still trying to reach out to Mary, but when she still gained no reaction, she deflated. Of course she wanted to leave, but Dean wanted to continue this quick memory.

With reluctance, Sam agreed to wait.

The phone rang, and Mary went to answer it. "Hello? … No, John, we're not having this conversation again… Think about what? … You've two kids at home…"

Dean watched his mother's expressions morph from anger to sadness. "I remember this. Mom and Dad were fighting and then he moved out for a couple days."

Sam sounded surprised. "Dad always said they had the perfect marriage."

"It wasn't perfect until after she died." Dean replied stiffly.

He never liked talking about this to Sam, so he never mentioned it. She never got to meet Mary or experience the relationship their parents had, so Dean wanted her to think it was always happy-go-lucky. He didn't want her to think their family was so messed up.

Mary looked like she was holding back tears.

"What happens next?" Sam asked quietly.

Dean went over and hugged his mom. "It's ok, Mom. Dad still loves you, I still love you. I'll never leave you."

Mary cupped Dean's cheek after they broke apart. "You are my little angel. How about some pie, ok?"

When Dean turned, he saw that Sam was smiling. "What?" He asked.

She shook her head. "I just never realized how long you've been cleaning up dad's messes."

"Whatever, let's keep moving." Dean said. He'd prefer not to think about it, and would rather get a move on.

However, Sam found a postcard that says Route 66. Then, they find that they are in a shack, with different clothes again. Sam is greeted by a golden retriever, licking all over her face. She greeted with equal happiness. Dean leaned away from it, he'd never been much of a dog person. They tended to make messes in his car.

The dog's name was bones, he noted from the name tag around its collar. "Bones?" Dean asked. This must be one of Sam's memories. He was a little disheartened that he hadn't seen any version of himself yet.

"Yeah. Bones was my dog. Hey." She stood, and opened up a pizza box, which lay on a nearby coffee table.

"Your… your dog?" Dean never remembered getting her a dog.

"Yeah."

Suddenly, Dean took in his surroundings. He realized, just when and where this was, and to say he was disappointed would be an understatement. "Is this Flagstaff?"

Sam grinned. "Yeah." She pet the dog. "Hey, boy."

Dean didn't understand why she was so happy. "This is a good memory for you?"

Sam laughed. "Yeah. I mean, I was on my own for two weeks. I lived on Funyuns and Mr. Pibb." She took a slice of pizza and fed it to the dog. The dog ate the piece sloppily.

"Wow." Dean struggled to find any good this memory brought him.

"What?"

"Well, you don't remember, do you?" Dean asked, and she just looked back to her dog. "You ran away on my watch. I looked everywhere for you. I thought you were dead. And when Dad came home…"

Sam looked to her hands, which were still running through the dog's fur. Dean was upset at this memory, upset that this entire time he thought she was dead, she was actually just feeding this dog pizza. He turned away, desperately wanting to resume their search for the road.

"Dean, look, I'm sorry. I never thought of it like that." She said, voice devoid of any happiness when she greeted her dog. She sounded empathetic.

Begrudgingly, he replied, "Forget it. Let's roll."

When he walks out into the daylight, it is suddenly nighttime. When his sister appears next to him, he felt the uneasy atmosphere about her, and decided it must be another of her memories. "What memory is this?" He asked.

"No idea." She immediately replied, taking a fistful of Dean's jacket. "Alright, come on. Dean… road, God, remember?"

He shook her off.

They watched as a younger version of Sam stormed out of the motel room, found a nearby car, and left, the door slamming behind her. "Wait a minute, wait a minute. This? This is the night you ditched us for Stanford, isn't it? This is your idea of heaven? Wow." He felt like he got punched "This was one of the worst nights of my life."

He remembered watching her storm out of the house, and he remembered yelling at her. He missed out on four years of her life. Four years, which he should have been by her side, protecting her and watching her grow. Yet, this was one of her best memories, as it clearly showed. He felt betrayed.

"I can't control this stuff." She threw up her arms in defense.

"Seriously? I mean, this is a happy memory for you?" Dean asked, turning to her.

She looked to her feet, and nervously scratched the back of her head. "I don't know, I mean, I was finally away from Dad."

Dean turned away, ashamed. He understood why she'd be happy leaving dad, but had she never considered his feelings? "Well, he wasn't the only one you got away from."

"Dean, I'm sorry, uh…" She struggled for words.

"I know, you didn't think of it like that." Dean seethed. She looked repulsed when he used her own words against her, mocking her.

"Dean!"

"Your heaven was getting away from your family whenever you could!" Dean countered. "It was clear how much you hated us."

Her eyes looked misty. "Man, I never got the crusts cut off my PBJs, I've just never experienced family like you have."

"I… I try, Samantha. Let me be your family." Dean said, reaching for her shoulder. He never realized this was what she really thought, that her heaven was going to be like this.

"I know." Sam replied quietly.

"We're a team, all right? You and me, against the world. That's how it's supposed to be." He looked into her hazel eyes.

"Yes, I know we are." Sam said, looking away.

"Yeah, sure. Us."

Sam looked devastated, and for a minute Dean felt sorry for how he treated her, until a bright searchlight turns on above them. Dean urged her toward the trees by the edge of the road, he stayed close behind her making sure she made it to safety first.

However, they were cornered by Zachariah, with no way out. At least, until someone comes to their rescue and pulled them into his own heaven.

Which just so happened to be Ellen's roadhouse, and the man who rescued them happened to be Ash himself.

Ash explained to the Winchesters how there were different heavens. In the center of it all is the garden, and that was where the Winchesters needed to be.

Ash even explained how he was able to travel in between heavens and meet famous people.

Either way, the only reason he knew to save them was because he built his own 'Angel radio'. Apparently, he's fluent in the language of angels. "So, uh, I mean, have you met anyone else? Like Ellen and Jo?" Sam decided to ask.

It's been awhile since they were mentioned, Dean realized. The only reason they were dead was because of them, since they had sacrificed themselves to save the Winchesters. Dean remembered that Ellen was much like the mother Sam never had, and he loved seeing the two interact.

Jo was a whole different story.

Ash was a bit taken aback by Sam's statement. "Ellen and Jo are dead?"

"Uh, yeah. A few months ago now. I'm sorry." Sam replied stiffly.

Ash hummed awkwardly. "They went down fighting?"

Sam nodded. "Until the very end."

Eventually, after some advice, they find a way into the garden. Or at least, they thought they did.

They ended up back at their house in Lawrence, Kansas. "What the… why are we back home?" Dean wondered. He was sure the road wasn't supposed to lead them here.

Sam also looked edgy. "I don't know. So, what are we going to do?"

"Keep looking for the road again, I guess." Dean shrugged. He really wanted to get out of the house, mostly because he was getting bad vibes. When Dean turned, Mary was standing there in a white nightgown.

"Honey, why are you up?" She asked.

Dean wanted to leave, like, now. "Look, I'm-I'm sorry. I love you but you're not real and we don't have time—"

"Did you have another nightmare? Tell me."

Dean looked to Sam for any help, but she looked mortified as she looked around the room with wide eyes, shaking her head.

"I gotta go." Dean suddenly realized that they were in Sam's nursery, and decided that it was best if they found the exit as fast as they could. He went to the walls to search for any sort of exit.

"Then how 'bout I tell you my nightmare, Dean? The night I burned."

Dean watched in horror as blood appeared on her nightgown over her stomach. "Samantha, let's get out of here." He said, raising his voice. His sister stood stock still, as if in a trance.

"Don't you walk away from me." Dean stopped. That was her authoritative tone. "I never loved you. You were my burden. I was shackled to you. Look what it got me."

When Dean turned back around, he saw the flash of yellow in her eyes. This wasn't Mary.

However, he stood frozen in place. He switched a glance with his sister, who was also just devastated. "Dean." Sam said, her voice pained.

"The worst was the smell. The pain, well. What can you say about your skin bubbling off? But the smell was so… You know, for a second I thought I'd left a pot roast burning in the oven. But… it was my meat." Dean finally moved away from Mary, who just followed him. He needed to find an exit. "And then, finally, I was dead. The one silver lining was that at least I was away from you. Everybody leaves you, Dean. You noticed? Mommy. Daddy. Even your dear Samantha."

Dean balled his fists. He knew it couldn't be like that, that it wasn't true.

"You ever ask yourself why? Maybe it's not them. Maybe it's just you." She laughed.

A new voice appeared, which made Dean's skin crawl. "Easy now, kitten."

Zachariah had appeared, along with two of his henchmen. Of course, with their usual talk of trying to get the Winchesters to say 'yes' to their respectful angels.

However, Joshua came in to save them. He took them to the garden, and they spoke. They spoke about how God wasn't going to step in to help them with the apocalypse, simply because He believed it wasn't His problem. Which Dean thought was just bull, but they didn't really need God anyway. They had an archangel.

So, Joshua just sent them back to their bodies. Dean immediately called Castiel, and they met up to chat about their findings. Castiel seemed disheartened at the news. "Maybe… maybe he's lying." He tried.

"I don't think he was, Cas." Sam shook her head, sighing. "I'm sorry."

Castiel looked up to the sky. "You son of a bitch. I believed in..."

Dean wanted to console him somehow. However, he couldn't find the right words to say.

"I don't need this anymore." Castiel said, pulling the amulet from his pocket and tossing it to Dean. "It's worthless."

It certainly wasn't worthless to Dean, but he decided not to say anything about it. "Cas, wait-" Sam said quickly.

However, Castiel is gone.

Sure, there was the chance they had Gabriel on their side, but how were they going to ice the devil without the big man upstairs backing them up? He wasn't sure how they were going to pull it all off.