The next morning you start preparing every single pastry, side dish, candy, cake, muffin, you name it! You also are a bit exhausted after staying up the entire night talking to Totoko and helping her figure stuff out. It turns out tonight she has a concert and wants you to come see her perform. You also find out she is the childhood friend of your neets, and you inform her of your relationship. She grins ear to ear asking for details and telling you she is happy they won't be so handsy towards her anymore which made you laugh.
She left a few hours ago informing you she needs to get everything prepared for tonight. You bid her farewell and get to work. Which finally brings us full circle. You sigh and finish making the batter for the blueberry muffins and set it aside. You are a bit, no you are stressed, and splash water in your face to wake you up. The oven dings and you go get the tray.
However, you're a tad too tired to think straight it seems.
Ya know considering you forget to grab and oven mitt….
You shriek the moment you pick up the tray and you realize you can't drop it or the muffins will go to waste! So you very quickly stand up and set the tray on the counter before shaking your hand wildly and turning on some cold water. You run your hand under the cold water and rub your temples.
"Lord have mercy," you mutter.
You wrap up your hand as best as you could, and then put in the new batch. You set these muffins in the glass casing and sigh.
"Well at least I'm getting things done…"
You start making the batter for your cookies when you hear the door open. You look up and see Todomatsu grinning. You smile and wave him over.
"Morning (y/n)!" Todomatsu greets you cutely.
You smile and say, "Morning, where are the others?"
Todomatsu rolls his eyes, "They didn't feel like coming."
You raise an eyebrow, "That's not like them why would-"
You remember you only told Todomatsu that they could come and snort.
"Did you not tell them, so you could have some alone time with me?" you ask grinning.
Todomatsu blushes and that's all the answer you need. You laugh and blush before hugging him. He giggles and hugs you back before looking at your mess of a kitchen.
"Things are busy then?" he asks.
You nod, "Very much so."
He shakes his head and says, "Next time I'm taking you on a proper date."
You laugh and stretch before asking him to help you. He happily agrees and you get started on everything else. Todomatsu organizes everything and makes sure everything is in tip top shape. You finish all of the muffins and all of the cakes when he notices your hand.
"(y/n)? What happened to your hand?" he asks narrowing his eyes at the bandage.
You lift it up and laugh nervously, "I was really tired and forgot to grab an oven mitt, which resulted in me picking up a fresh hot pan…."
"What?!" Todomatsu exclaims before rushing over and holding your hand gently.
"Totty, I'm fine…" you tell him gently.
He pouts and says, "I don't like seeing you hurt at all…"
You smile and kiss his cheek, "I'm fine I promise…"
Todomatsu smiles and asks, "Why were you so tired?"
"I had a guest who needed my help, and we talked the whole night. Oh wait that's right! You boys know her! Her name is Totoko!" you exclaim.
Todomatsu's jaw drops and he says, "You met Totoko!?"
You nod, "She was funny, and just needed to be pushed in the right direction!"
Todomatsu stares dumbfounded by this new piece of information, and you can't help but laugh at his expression. You tell him about last night's events, and about her concert tonight. You ask if Todomatsu and his brothers want to go and Todomatsu says yes. You grin ear to ear and decide to try and finish up a lot of stuff. You tell Todomatsu to go on home and inform the brothers while you finish up a few things. Todomatsu seems reluctant, but you give him a soft chaste kiss and he's pleased.
You shake your head before finishing up a lot and setting it out. You are very proud of the progress you and Todomatsu made, and pat yourself on the back. Everything will be ok you tell yourself, and get ready for Totoko's concert. You put on a nice jacket and head out a cold breeze hitting your face.
It's strange.
It feels like it's telling you not to go…
You shake your head and make your way to the location Totoko told you about fairly easy. The wind picks up ever so often, but you manage it. You arrive, and place your coat with everyone else's and walk inside. You see the boys all huddled together and at the front. You giggle and make your way over.
"Hello boys!" you greet.
They turn to you and all smile.
"(y/n)!" they all exclaim.
Jyushimatsu hugs you tightly before pushing you in the middle. You laugh and say hello to the others and talk until the concert starts. You aren't expecting Totoko's outfit however…
You grin and shake your head. Idols sure are peculiar. You cheer with the boys and laugh seeing Totoko look so confident and happy. She sees the boys and her eyes lock onto yours before she smiles. You grin and nod offering your support. She continues on with her concert and when it's over meets all 7 of you.
"So how'd you like it?" she asks smiling.
"Oh I really enj-"
"You were AMAZING TOTOKO!" Osomatsu interrupts.
You laugh at his enthusiasm and nod, "Yes you did a very-"
"You were incredible!" Choromatsu says.
"Your clothes are so cute!" Todomatsu gushes.
"Good job," Ichimatsu says.
"Your voice is that of an angel sent from heaven~" Karamatsu says dramatically.
"HOMERUN!" Jyushimatsu exclaims.
You feel a slight sting but quickly ignore it smiling, "Yes you did very good Totoko."
She giggles and suddenly Osomatsu exclaims, "Good? You were perfect! No one is as perfect as you!"
That 'sting' you felt earlier now felt like a quick stab and you silently suck in a beath. The others agree with their elder brother as Totoko just giggles and receives the compliments like she's used to it. You bite the inside of your cheek listening as each one compliments her and says how lovely she is. You're not one to particularly get jealous, but something about hearing them compliment her so much really hurt.
You slowly back up and watch as the hole is filled as the brothers squish together. You feel very hurt at how they completely disregard that you leave. You feel that shitty feeling enter your gut, and slowly feel your stomach lurch.
'Oh God please not now…' you think to yourself.
In all truth you aren't jealous so to speak.
You're afraid.
You are afraid.
Why shouldn't you be?
Your own parents who are supposed to protect you, love you, cherish you, and support you dropped you like a broken toy and left. Your only useful when they can play for you and you can't. As you watch the brothers tell Totoko how amazing she is you feel like a broken toy…
And you're about to be left behind…
"I'll always love Totoko more than anything!"
That's the line that sets you off.
You watch as the brothers grin and nod before you run off forgetting your coat.
Boy was that a mistake…
You sprint out as fast as possible running to wherever your legs would take you. You felt hot tears fall down your face and scrub them away just running. Your legs feel as if they are on fire by the time you decide to stop.
And you can't help but wonder…
Does the world hate you?
You end up in the exact same place everything started, and your mind travels back to that day. You walk to the edge of the bridge before dropping to your knees and sobbing. Your entire body trembles as you sob.
'Stop it,' you think.
'Stop being so Goddamn useless!'
You shout and kick the bridge frustrated. Finally you just plop down and lean against the edge crying. You feel the icy wind freeze your face and knuckles. You know you need to get inside or you could develop hypothermia.
And yet.
You can't find it in you to care.
Your mind turns to a very dark place and one final thought of light echoes into your brain.
'The boys would never leave me!'
But you grimace and say to no one, "Then again I never thought I parents would leave me."
You sigh and wipe away your tears once longer do you feel that sting or stab. You don't feel anger or sadness.
In fact.
You don't feel anything at all. All you feel is a numbness that enters you and completely stops the tears, stops the pain, stops everything.
And that's just what you need.
To feel numb. To feel NOTHING. You take in a deep breath before getting up and looking up to the moon. It's bright and right above you. Usually you love seeing the moon, but now all you see is a dumb rock using the sun to help it shine.
You laugh and say, "It's just like me! A useless object who people only like when you're useful!"
You laugh bitterly and turn to look as the icy water below. No one was here to stop you now why wait? You're just a lost cause after all. However something inside tells you that whatever you're thinking is wrong and you can't do it.
You sigh and just watch the dark cloud roll across the sky and watch the light dance across the water. You're not sure what you're doing, but you know right now you just don't want to go home. You don't wanna move at all.
"If you stay out any longer you'll freeze to death!"
You jump and spin around seeing someone you weren't expecting. Your eyes lock onto her blue ones, and her silvery blonde almost white hair flows behind her. She has that soft smile that you know too well, and she holds onto that damn sunhat she always wears. Her white sundress seems not appropriate for this kind of weather and yet it looks so right on her.
"It's you…" you mutter.
She giggles, "It's me!"
You bow your head wondering how she always finds you in your time of need. Every goddamn time she finds you when you're broken or hurt, and you laugh looking up and into her eyes.
"How are you?" she asks sweetly.
You sigh and shake your head, "How come you always find me on my shittiest days?"
She scrunches her face up and says, "First, Language and second I don't know."
She puckers her lips and says, "So I'm guessing you need me?"
You sigh and nod. She walks over and leans against the railing next to you before grinning.
"Just tell me all your problems!" she says winking.
You smile and think 'I guess I won't have to worry about something by myself this time….'
Because my angel came to help me this time around...