Crazy trouble with love

Taiga and Shirou

Series: Fate Stay

xxxxxxxxxxxx

-Emiya Household-

"SHIROU~ MORE SAKE! HA~" said a now drunk Taiga was her breasts hung loose from her shirt.

"Taiga-nee! No more!" Shirou exclaimed with a blush as he tried to look away.

"Why is it SOOOOOO HOT~" She said as she attempted to take off her panties. "Let me undress~"

Shirou panicked and grabbed the nearest blanket before wrapping it around her.

"Shirou! It's to HOT~ Please let me undress."

"No Taiga-nee." He spoke trying to keep the blanket around her.

"Shirou~ You-You..." She started to cry. "THINK I'M UGLY! SHIROU-KUN! YOU MEANY!"

"Oh no." he sighed before patting her back. "I just think you need to keep your clothes on. You think you're warm, but your body is actually cold."

"Shirou-kun~" She turned to face him. "ARE YOU CHEATING ON YOUR SISTER?"

"C-Cheating? What do you mean?" He asked in slight fear.

"THOSE GIRLS! YOU CHEATING ….Pervert~"

"Uh, I never got in a relationship with them." He sweatdrop.

"Don't lie….Rin, Sakura, SABER, RIDER! THOSE GIRLS ARE ALWAYS WITH YOU!"

"Rin, Sakura, and Rider are close friends, and Saber lives here." He deadpanned.

"YOU CHEATER!" She started to cry again. "You cheated on me."

"That implies we were in a relationship."

"B-But…..AWAW!"

"Aw come on Taiga-nee."

"Night….the time for us~" Ok...Taiga is starting to lose it. "You are so cute~ KISS ME!"

"Wah!" He fell back as she lunged and landed on top of him.

"Shirou-KOI!~" She said while kissing Shirou's face.

"Taiga-nee!" He gasped out trying to hold her back.

"Shirou-koi….you...hate..me?"

"No! But you're drunk and not yourself!" He cried out trying to ignore the sight of her breasts.

"It's not TRUE~ I Am NOT~ Drunk~ I'm dormA~" She said with a slur.

"Uh, what?" He spoke confused.

"I am your wife~ Now kiss me~"

"Taiga-nee! You need to try and take a nap!" He cried out holding her face back.

"..." she didn't say anything but her face grinned.

"What are you smiling about?" He asked nervously.

"LET US CONSUMMATE OUR LOVE, SHIROU-KOI~"

"No!" He cried out before he pushed her to the side and tried to get up, but tripped when she grabbed his ankle.

"But….you promised…." Her drunken face started to cry...again….

"Promise what?" He asked.

"To...marry me….you promised…" she sniffled. "YOU FORGOT!"

"Um...wha?"

Shirou….NEVER get a drunken person mad...EVER! Nice knowing you.

Taiga's gaze grew darker and he felt like he was looking at a pissed off tiger.

"YOU FORGOT! WHY SHIROU EMIYA! WHY!"

He gulped and heard her make a low growl before she started dragging him towards her.

"YOU CHEATING HUSBAND! YOU FORGOT! I HATE YOU! I FUCKING HATE YOU SHIROU-KOI!"

"AHH!" He panicked and tried clawing at the floor as she grabbed the back of his shirt.

"SHIROU EMIYA! GET BACK HERE! NOW!"

"CALM DOWN TAIGA-NEE!" He cried out in fear.

"I AM CALM! YOU CHEATING BASTARD!" She made him sit up and look at her. "NOW! TELL ME WHY OR I WILL CUT YOUR BALLS OFF!"

"I DON'T REMEMBER!" He waved his arms around in panic as he was paralyzed with fear.

"...you bastard...why...you promised me...on your father's grave…" Taiga started to lose all emotions except for despair. "...but…..now you forgot….." She started sobbing. "...Shirou-koi...you stupid bastar..bast...WAWAW!"

Shirou frowned seeing her sobbing and patted her back.

"Shioru-koi…..why did you forget?"

"I don't know."

"...Ah Ah.." Taiga started to chuckle. "I just I'm like the Yuki-Onna. I love someone and they break my heart….ah ah….." She got off Shirou before stumbling to the nearby closet...and...OH CRAP! SHIROU STOP HER! "Good...bye...world…" FUCK!

Shirou ran at her and tackled her before she could hold the knife up.

"Shirou-koi?" She looked shocked as Shirou looked at her in a VERY angry expression, even worse then with Gilgamesh!

"WHAT ARE TRYING TO DO!"

"I-"

"NEVER TRY THAT AGAIN!"

"...Shirou-koi….you didn't forget…."

"Look, I can't remember! But just cause I forgot doesn't mean you should try and kill yourself!"

"...just like before….you saved me again…" Taiga started to smile.

"Just tell me what happened."

"...After your father died...I tried to kill myself…" her smile disappeared.

"What?"

"I tried to kill myself...yet you saved me….you even promised me that, 'I would marry Nee-chan!' ….You rekindled my soul...your saved me…" Her eyes started to water. "You are my husband, Shirou-koi."

He gulped as she reached up and hugged him close to her chest.

"Thank you….Shirou-k.o.i.~" she leaned down and licked his cheek. "So tasty~"

He blushed as she wrapped her legs around his lower body.

"...Shirou-koi…." She started blushing even more. "Give me your child~"

He looked at her in shock before she leaned down and kissed him. Her stomach started to feel her husband's cock poking her folds from inside his pants.

"Let me take those dirty clothes off my husband~"

Shirou gasped as Taiga flipped them over and eagerly worked on taking his pants off.

"So...cute~" Yep...Shirou's cock is small and full of pre-cum. "So tasty."

"T-Taiga-ne-" Shirou blushed.

"Its "Chan" my husband~" She said as her breasts covered his face. She reached down and moved her hand against his cock. "I want it~"

'I can't believe this is happening.'

"Husband…..Are you thinking of CHEATING?"

"N-No!"

"Then…" She moved her body closer to his face. "Drink my nipples up~"

He gulped and hesitantly latched onto her nipple.

"AH~ My husband! SHIROU-KOI!" She moaned as she felt his tongue on her hard nipples.

'Wow, she's really sensitive.'

"SHIROU-KOI!" She moaned even louder as Shirou's cock poured his semen onto her body. She looked down and hummed at the hot seed on her skin. "My~"

"T-Taiga-nee…" he panted.

"It's 'CHAN!' remember?"

"A-Are we done?"

"NO~" Taiga said before moving closer to his cock with her folds. "Give me your child~ MY HUSBAND!"

"M...maybe we could hold off?" He suggested.

"..." She glared as she placed her pussy onto his cock's tip. "NO! I WANT YOUR CHILD! RIGHT NOW!"

'I'm so fucked.'

"Oh...Shirou-koi….did you have your virginity taken by THOSE BITCHES?!"

"N-NO!"

"..." She finally consumed his cock and blood fell from her folds. "...So you're still a virgin?"

"Well not now."

"...Shirou-koi…"

"Yeah?"

"Marry me...for real…." She said as she starts to thrust Shirou's cock into her uterus. "Please." She purred.

"Uh...well...I'm not…"

"Its legal….and I really love you...Shirou-koi~"

"Shouldn't we think about the future first?"

"...Aren't we already living together?" She moaned as her uterus started to burst.

"Well yeah but…."

"Then marry me and MAKE ME PREGNANT!" She cried in lust. "IMPREGNATE ME!"

'I don't think she'll listen.'

"Or are you going to leave me alone…."

"Where would I go?" He grunted.

"...with those bitches….and leave me with your child...alone…"

"You know I'd never do that!"

"Shirou-koi~ I LOVE YOU!" She cried as his cock poured his sperm into her womb. "AHHH~!"

They both fell to the floor as Taiga felt her husband's sperm exited her pussy.

"We need to go again."

"Shirou-koi~" She said as they fell asleep.

-two months later-

"SHIROU!"

"Um...Master?"

"Yes. Saber?"

"Are you brother and sister or husband and wife?"

"The latter."

"Oh. So...why is she trying to eat MY LEG THEN?!" Yep...a two month pregnant Taiga was currently trying to eat Saber's leg.

"TAIGA-NEE!" Shirou cried trying to pry her jaw off Saber's ankle.

"ITS TAIGA-CHAN! AND LET ME EAT HER!"

"MASTER! STOP HER!"

"BE QUIET SABER HAMBURGER !"

"WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT!?"

Shirou groaned and kept trying to pry Taiga off his servant.

"Please! Shirou-koi! Let me eat her….your daughter is HUNGRY! Are you going to let her starve?!" Taiga looked at him with crying eyes.

"We have food in the kitchen!" He exclaimed.

"But she is IRON based! And calcium rich too!"

"NO I'M NOT!"

Saber kept trying to shove Taiga off while Shirou tried to think of something.

"Peasant! Your king is here!" Yelled Gilgamesh from the doorway.

"We don't have time for you." Groaned Shirou before getting an evil idea. "Taiga-chan."

"Yes, Shirou-koi?"

"Look! Gold!"

Taiga's eyes turned into slits. "FOOD!" She growled as she tackled the king of heros to the ground. "FEED MY CHILD!"

"Get off me wench!" He yelled trying to push her off.

Rule number 1,492,412 of marriage: NEVER get a pregnant woman PISSED OFF...EVER!

"NOW DIE YOU SON OF A BITCH!"

"AH!" He cried out as Taiga started biting his neck.

"Um….Master? Should we stop her?"

"You wanna?"

"No."

"There ya go."

"GAH! MY ARM! MY RIBS! STOP EATING ME!"

Yep….goodbye king of heros...and HELLO to the queen of tigers...GAO!

-omake-

Shirou gulped as he slowly moved through the hall with careful precision. 'Quietly….QUIETLY!'

"Daddy?"

Shirou freezed.

"Were you sneaking in the house?"

"Um...Akia-chan...I um…"

"I thought mommy didn't like that?"

"Right…" 'Crap.'

His daughter grinned like a tiger before leaping and bit on his ankle.

"GHA! AKIA!"

"Akia-chan?" Said Taiga in a familiar suit of golden armor. "Why are you up so late?"

"Daddy is sneaking around again." She smiled.

"Oh really?" Taiga crossed her arms.

"Taiga-Chan….I-I'm sorry!"

"It's not nice to try and sneak out of our room when we're cuddling."

"But I was going to the bathroom!"

"But isn't the bathroom the other way daddy?"

"Uh, yes! But I wanted to go and uh…."

"You were what?"

"Gotta go!" He turned and bolted down the hall with his daughter now holding onto the back of his shirt.

"SHIROU-KOI! GET BACK HERE WITH OUR DAUGHTER!"

"AH!" Shirou turned and saw his daughter holding on. "Akia-chan! You shouldn't hold onto a person when they're running!"

"And you shouldn't be cheating on Mommy!"

"I'm not cheating on her!" He cried out before he saw his wife running after him while riding a golden TIGER?!

"Is that mommy?" Akia said with stars in her eyes.

"Taiga-chan! Calm down!" He pleaded running even faster through the halls.

"THEN TELL WHY I SHOULDN'T EAT YOU!"

"SINCE WHEN DID YOU BECOME A FULL FLEDGE CANNIBAL?!" He cried with anime tears before turning the corner and booking it.

"GET BACK HERE!" She yelled as ….chains shot out from the tiger's mouth….What?

Shirou got entangled by them and fell on his place while his daughter was sitting on his back.

"Now….TELL ME WHY YOU WERE SNEAKING OUT!"

"You didn't stop purring and nipping at my neck! I thought you were gonna bite me!"

"...oh….sorry Shirou-koi….I just have very weird dreams about us." She said calmly as the golden tiger disappeared.

"Not in front of Akia-chan!" He exclaimed.

"Daddy?"

"Yes?"

"What is Incest?"

"W-W-WHERE DID YOU HEAR THAT?!" He asked in shock while Taiga dragged them back to her.

"...Saber-san and Illya-san…."

"Sweetie, if you have the urge to bite something, go ahead and bite your aunties." Smiled Taiga.

"Yes mommy….but can I bite daddy's snake?"

"NO!" They cried out in the same time.

"Aw...Please~" She said with tiger eyes.

"No! Now go to bed and let me deal with your father." Spoke Taiga holding up the tied up Shirou.

"Yes...momma…" She said before sulking to her room.

"You know this is because of you, right?" Sweatdrop Shirou.

"Shirou-koi~ What makes you say that?"

"You literally ate a hero to gain all his powers, which it in itself was cannibalism. Something I'm worried Akia-chan is gonna end up doing when she gets older."

"You started it." She glared.

"I DIDN'T GO AND CHOMP ON PEOPLE'S ANKLES!"

"AND YOU DIDN'T NEED TO CHEAT ON ME!"

"HOW! How and when did I ever cheat on you! Can't you listen for five minutes?"

"...Sorry Shirou-koi…."

"So again, the fact our daughter might like biting people concerns me cause I don't need her trying to bite someone's head off!"

"Have you EVER seen our daughter doing that?!"

"No, but the fact you were pregnant and ate a man might have some influence on her."

"...You still let me eat him…."

"Touche, but if I tried stopping you, I might have lost a finger, or a hand, or my whole arm!"

"I would never do that to you!" Taiga retorted. "I love you too much for that!"

"Can we just go back to bed? I'm way too tired." He yawned.

"Yes, Shirou-koi, lets….because tomorrow is Akia-chan's first day at school."

'If she starts biting someone, I'm gonna need to tell her that her own mother ate a hero when she was pregnant. That might keep her from doing anything rash.'

Maybe...Maybe not.

"Shirou-koi….?"

"Yes?"

"Let me keep you warm tonight~" She purred.

He sighed as she carried him back to their bedroom.

-Akia's room-

'Daddy….' Thought Akia as she...oh crap...looked at a picture of her father with the drawing of a heart on it. 'I will be your wife….~' she started to giggle as her dreams were filled with happiness.

-Omake 2-

"Um...Saber?"

"Yes Master?"

"Are you still made at Akia-chan for trying to bite your butt?" He said as Akia was hanging, from a pole with a bite mark on her butt.

"Maybe…." She smirked as Shirou sweatdropped.