Nekozawa had managed to calm me down and he couldn't stress enough on the fact that my time was running short. I knew this. I never thought it would come so soon. I've felt like I've missed so much but this was my fault. I couldn't turn back the clock.

Before I knew it, I was in a small black car with Takashi. He was currently driving me to the hospital Tomo was in. He hasn't heard anything other than he was currently being kept there. I felt so guilty of the ordeal, I didn't want to speak. I couldn't think of anything I could say. My mouth felt like the dessert from regret. I should have never followed Takashi there. The atmosphere was heavy and being in a confined space didn't help. It was suffocating and I couldn't prevent myself from tugging on my hair.

Takashi kept his eyes forward, his famous expressionless face avoiding my direction. He wanted to ask questions, I knew he did. However, he was holding himself back. After everything that had happened, I'm surprised he hasn't drowned me for answers. I didn't know what to say. Should I even try? I couldn't take the thick air anymore and rolled the window down a bit. The morning air hitting my face made me feel a tad bit better.

Eventually, that didn't help and I had to say something.

"I didn't know you could drive?" I spoke up, trying my best to sound normal.

He didn't look at me, "Honey likes it when it's just us sometimes." His tone was flat and dry. It tried my best to not let it get to me.

"I see," I tried shrugging his voice out of my head. "I wish I could have gotten to drive." He didn't notice my past tense. Thankful, he ignored my slip up; not like he would understand. Even if I was still alive, I could never afford a car. That was more like a dream I would never have come true.

"Maybe-" He stopped himself. His eyebrows scrunched up a bit as he was thinking, "I'll take you to try sometime." His words were smoother and less tense. This made me feel more relaxed. I let my hair go and that's when he glanced at me. "You pull on your hair a lot."

My hands went back up but I stopped. Since he was asking me a question, it made me think he would ask more. "I tend to get nervous a lot."

I was like a small mouse. If anyone was to talk to me, I would run and hide. Everybody was like a cat, they were constantly out to get me. However, I'm different. I'm not a mouse anymore. I wanted to be a cat like everyone else but that too was long gone. I was something different entirely. No matter what I was now or what I would end up being.

I'm tired of running away and hiding.

"Takashi," I decided to address the issue. "I know you must have a lot of questions and I would tell you everything if I could." If everything was simpler, I would read him off my life story but it wasn't. Life wasn't a book. He decided to be silent was the best thing and just listen. Looking out the window, I saw the people pass by. They looked so carefree, full of life and happiness; it was nice. Before, I would silently curse at them and wish for their misfortune. It wasn't fair that their lives were better than mine.

I continued, "I want to say thank you. You don't press me for answers and you don't force me to do anything. You've always been kind to me and you listen. I'm thankful for everything you've done." His eyes kept shifting from me to the road when we got to a stop light, he sighed. He was conflicted and didn't know what to say. I kept talking, "You're...Precious to me in a way."

It was small, barely a touch but I felt his fingers brush against mine. I didn't move my hand, "Thank you, Takashi. Thank you for everything."

The rest of the drive was quiet, he kept his hand close against mine but he didn't progress further. We pulled up to the front of the hospital, all the lights from the windows gave me an eery feeling. I never liked hospitals. One time when I was younger, I hurt myself at the park and wouldn't stop crying. Mother rushed me over here saying 'boys don't like girls with scars.' All I did was scrape my knees. The entire time, all I could hear were children crying and people coughing.

It made me uncomfortable.

This is different though. I didn't scrape my knee and Mother wasn't lecturing me on how girls shouldn't run or play in the dirt. I was here for him. Tomo was in there. He was hurt because of me and I have to set things right. I have to see him no matter what happens. Seeing the nurses walking outside made this feel all too real. I could hear the children crying in my mind and the never-ending coughing. I could almost hear Mother yelling and degrading me.

"I'll follow you after I park the car," Takashi spoke.

I shook away the past, I had to face the future.

I nodded, "Alright."

I got out of the car and he waited till I reached the front door. I watched him drive to the side of the parking lot. Taking a deep breath, I walked inside with lead feet. It was hard to walk up to the desk. Being looked at from people with dark eyes. They were sick and didn't want to be here just as much as me. The place smelled heavily of cleaner and death. The bright white walls and lights could give someone a headache. If I was my old self, I surely would have gripped my head in pain. When I finally got to the desk, a tired nurse gazed up at me from her computer.

"How may I help you?" She spoke quietly.

I was fumbling with my fingers, trying to pick at my long nails. I didn't want to be here. I could almost vividly see my younger self, crying and begging to go home. The sick patients all around me just reminded me that death was all too real. The exhausted doctors who's feet shuffled around from long cruel hours of work made me feel even more unwelcome. The nurse waited for my answer, too tired to care.

"I'm here to see Tomo."

She answered back immediately, "The last name?" She was already typing things into her small computer, her eyes glazed over like she was a zombie.

I didn't know his last name, I didn't even know if Tomo was his full name. Even though we were friends and he knew so much about me, I barely knew anything about him. I knew little of his parents, he told me why he left home and a few other things. However, who really was Tomo? I don't know about his childhood, why did he start fighting? Hell, I didn't even know he smoked cigarettes and I've lived with him.

Tomo was a mystery.

Sadly, I don't have the time to fully know him. I wished I could be with him again before Mother showed up. That was in the past now and I had to fix things for the future. Even though, I didn't have one.

"I... Don't know." I eventually said.

She looked annoyed for me making her job a little harder and putting more stress into her already tiresome day. She typed into her black keyboard, her long bright pink nails clacking against the plastic. Several minutes went by and she sighed, "Can you give me a description?"

This was taking to long! I just want to see him.

"He's tall, maybe around six feet? He has bright white hair-"

She then stopped me with her finger raised, "Yamauchi Tomohiro is in room 319."

Hearing his full name made me feel like he was a whole new person; it was weird. It left me with another question, why did he go by Tomo? Was it just a nickname that stuck? This new information made him feel even more of a stranger. I thanked the nurse and went up the stairs. I passed by several patients and each one looked more unpleasant than the last. I felt bad for them. They just wanted to go home and feel better.

I stopped when I heard some nurses talking.

"I'm surprised she survived the fall."

"You're telling me! Why would she even jump is my question."

I stepped back, peeking around the corner. The two nurses were gossiping rather loudly, not caring who could hear. I knew I had something better to do. I needed to be by Tomo's side but something told me to stop. Their words pulled me like a mouse smelling some cheese. They said someone jumped and barely survived. What if... No, that possibility can't involve me.

The nurse with brown curls sighed "Her school life must have been terrible."

"You know bullying is getting worse." The other blonde nurse pouted.

"But jumping off a roof is a little much."

I caught myself walking towards them, my curiosity was becoming too much. It all sounded too similar and it frightened me. What if something happened and there was that small chance it was me?

What if I survived?

I got as close as I could without being noticed and listened as best as I could. I needed to see them. I had to see the person they were talking about.

"I checked her last so it should be your turn next." The nurse with curls said, checking her clipboard.

The other groaned, "But they haven't woken up in days."

"You still have to check." With that said, the nurses went on their way. I followed the blonde, but not to close. Luckily, we were heading towards the 3rd floor. My mind was racing, my hands were shaking and every step I took felt like I was stepping into the unknown. I wanted to know so badly. What if it was me? There was a small chance that I could be saved.

We stopped at a room the furthest away from the stairs, everyone was so busy no stopped me to ask questions. I stayed behind a bush by the corner, waiting for the nurse to go in. She opened the door and smiled, "You're awake! And you're here doctor. How is she feeling?" She walked in, closing the door behind her. I couldn't hear anything else as I decided to sit on the bench. I would pretend to be a visitor, like a friend or something.

After several minutes, the doctor and nurse stepped out. The first to notice me was the doctor, "You here to visit?"

I nodded, "Yes."

The nurse turned around, peeking into the room. "A visitor is here." They then dismissed me, walking away while like laughing to themselves.

Getting up felt like it took every last ounce of energy I had, I reached for the handle, not knowing if I wanted to truly enter or not. When I opened the door, the white sheet was opened and laying in the bed was a girl, she was looking out the window.

It wasn't me.

My heart didn't know if it should sink or rise. My feelings were all over the place. I thought that I could have a chance or maybe, this was all a terrible dream. I wanted to live. I wanted a second chance but not every story gets one. I should have never come into this room, now I didn't know what to do. Deciding it was the best to just leave, I turned around.

"Excuse me, who are you?" She called out with a delicate voice.

Freezing up, I couldn't speak. Peeking over my shoulder, she wasn't much different from me. She had short black straight hair that hugged her face and brown eyes. She looked so tired. Her eyes were dark and had bags like she had never slept a day in her life. Her skin was pale like a white flower and the way she looked at me was devoided of all hope.

I didn't know her situation or her as a person. I had no reason to stick my nose in her business but the reason for her being here was all too familiar. Maybe, talking to her would be better than running. I had no one to turn to in my time of need. In the end, due to my loneliness and failure to cope, I jumped as well. I took a seat at the end of her bed and she smiled slightly at my gesture.

"You look familiar, " she said. "perhaps I know you from somewhere."

I cleared my throat, "Maybe."

She seemed satisfied with that and went to look out the window once more, "It's nice to have a visitor. Even if we are strangers."

I want to ask why she did it. What could have driven her to end her life? Could she be like me? Was everything was becoming too much. School and home were both places of torture and the thought of dying was the only peaceful thing she had. Why did she jump and not a different method? I wanted to ask so many personal questions but I didn't have the right to ask her. I shouldn't even be here in the first place.

"I hope you feel better," I spoke up, trying to sound polite.

There was a tense silence before she looked at me with a dead expression, "The doctor told me I'll never walk again." I almost gasped but caught myself. "I landed on my legs wrong and ruined them. He said that even though I can't use them anymore, they saved my life from the fall." I didn't know what to say. What could I say? This girl was now in a position to where she will always have to work harder.

Something dawned on me.

The girl in front of me could have been me.

She jumped off a building, possibly bullied in school and even though she tried to kill herself, she failed. Because she failed, she got to live. However, she can never walk again. What if I survived the fall? Would I have been injured to this extent? I could see Mother screaming because of my attempt to die. This made me shiver, a visible frown moving across my lips.

"Don't be sad," She showed me a smile. "I'm happy I'm alive."

This caught me off guard.

Didn't she want to die? Shouldn't she be upset that she is still here? How could she be happy with her condition?

She noticed my questioning eyes and gladly continued, "When I was unconscious, I kept seeing my little siblings. I have two younger sisters." She seemed comfortable talking to me, it seemed to make her feel better. "Who would take care of them when I'm gone? My parents work all the time and often take their frustrations out on us so I take care of my sisters. If not for me, what would happened to them?"

I was conflicted. If I had truly died, what would have happened to Seika? When I found out she was only pretending to satisfy Mother, would she have truly missed me. We didn't get along only because of our roles to please our mother. If I was gone, would she have become the new victim?

"I'm happy I lived, I may be injured from now on but I can still support them." With this said, we heard the door open. Standing there were two girls with black hair. The didn't look older than 10. When they saw her awake, they screamed and ran to her side. I watched as the two kids practically jumped onto her.

"You're awake!" One cried, tears starting to pour down her chubby face.

The other couldn't control her sobs, "We thought you were going away!"

The girl hugged her sisters but her eyes grew large when she looked towards the door. Standing there were two middle-aged adults. They both had black hair and tired brown eyes but they were filled with regret. They slowly walked to her, "Rin..." They both sounded tired.

"Yes..."

I felt like my time here was done and I went to leave quietly, looking back I saw them hug Rin while crying. I knew at that moment that she would be okay. That life was only going to look up from there. I was happy for her and seeing this gave me more courage to face Tomo.

Surely, he would forgive me.