CHAPTER 63: TO GO FORTH

Tayomi looked at Hitsugaya intently, wondering what thoughts were running through his mind at that very moment. She wondered how much courage it took for him to finally close the distance between them tonight. She felt his arms tighten their grip around her body, pressing her firmly against him. His hands slowly ran down her back and stroked her hair, his eyes strongly fixated on hers. His gaze was so intense that she felt as if his icy, yet warm, stare was burning right into her purplish-blue eyes.

"You can't do this…" Tayomi whispered, as she felt him go closer and closer to her. "We're under orders to halt our relationship. You can't do this."

"You really think that the Captain-Commander's orders is enough to stop my feelings for you?"

Her eyes instantly widened once he spoke those words. Yes, she knew it would not. However, she could not simply let him disobey orders because of her. She would not know what the consequences would be for them both. Demotion? Losing their positions? Or worse… Separation?

"I know it isn't. But can you at least hear me out?"

Tayomi felt Hitsugaya's lips graze her forehead softly. In that moment, from that one little action, she could feel all the feelings he had for her pour out from his heart into hers.

"About fifty years ago, I thought I'd lost you. I thought I'd lost you forever. I didn't want to believe it but I thought I really did lose you. And then you came back. And I knew I just… I just couldn't let you go again. No matter what happens. For those fifty years when you were gone, I just felt like a whole chunk of my life was missing. You have no idea… You have no idea how happy I was when I saw your face again. And I have every intention to keep you in my life forever. I would… I would gladly abandon my position as Captain if it meant that I couldn't be with you. There just wouldn't be a point in anything."

Tayomi could feel tears welling up in her eyes. She knew she felt exactly the same. Being separated from him absolutely killed her inside. She tried her best to save his life and heal his injuries. She wanted to be in his life forever, as much as he wanted to be in hers. Hitsugaya gently released his grip and nothing could prepare Tayomi for what he was about to do.

"I know we're still young. I know we're in the middle of a huge war. But at the very least, I just want to make a promise to you. The only thing is I hope you'll agree to this."

He took out a tiny box from his back pocket, got down on one knee and held her hand tight.

"Will you marry me?"

"OH MY GOSH! OH MY GOSH! YES, TAICHO! I AM SO PROUD OF YOU! GOOD JOB TAICHO! THOSE MOVIES INSPIRED YOU WELL!"

"Shhh! Matsumoto-san! Shiro-chan can't know we're awake!"

"Yeah! Shut Up Matsumoto! We need to hear the answer!"

Matsumoto, Hinamori and Renji were hiding up on the rooftop, watching the sequence of events unfold through the pinhole camera connected to Hinamori's laptop.

"I guess it's a good thing Tayomi-chan gave me this!" Hinamori grinned.

"Yeah! You're so lucky that your Captain buys all sorts of nice things for you! I wish I had a Captain like Tayomi-chan! No paperwork sounds great to me!"

"Both of you! Keep it down! And remember to save this footage!"

Tayomi stood there, completely stunned by what had just happened.

"Wait… Susu-chan… Are you for real..?"

"Do I look like I'm joking..?"

"Sorry… It's just that I didn't expect this… I don't know how to respond…"

"You can just reply with a 'yes' or 'no'."

Tayomi simply stared at him, still stunned by what had just happened. All of a sudden, Hitsugaya grumbled and shut the box, standing up abruptly and heading for the door.

"ARGH I knew this was a bad idea. I was too reckless. I'm sorry, Tayomi. Just pretend this never happened. I probably just troubled you."

"Yes. I'm saying yes."

He stopped in his tracks, and turned to face her immediately.

"Yes, Susu-chan. I want to spend my life with you. I promise you that. Yes."

Hitsugaya ran to her, holding her face in his hands, with her hands holding onto his wrists tightly. She said yes… She said yes!

He gingerly removed the ring from the box and put it onto her ring finger, kissing her hand gently.

"And with that, I guess I'm yours..?" Tayomi smiled sheepishly, her cheeks burning red.

"Not completely." Hitsugaya murmured, before locking the door and holding her close to him.

The next morning, Tayomi awoke to sunlight gently beaming onto her face. She rubbed her eyes and turned to her right, feeling tired after an eventful night. Hitsugaya was still sound asleep, his strong arms still holding her close to him. Her cheeks flushed bright pink when she recalled what had happened last night, making her feel so shy that she got up instantly.

"Don't go yet."

"But it's morning…" Tayomi protested. "And I need to get dressed. We have to train everyone later and I'm already still tired… I don't need to be late as well."

"Just a while more…" Hitsugaya muttered, burying his face in her chest.

"What do you think you're trying to do? Let go now!" Tayomi pushed him away and ran to the bathroom to wash up.

"After we're done with Aizen… You'll have to deal with this everyday."

The mention of Aizen brought a single thought to Tayomi's mind and she paused. After Aizen, how would things be then..?

"Yeah… Yeah I would," she spoke, stepping into the shower.

As the water ran down from the shower head, Tayomi stood still, thoughts flooding her head. She knew she should not have said yes. She knew what was about to happen. She should not have let her emotions take over her.

Because… Was there even a future to speak of?

"Ugh… Tayomi-chan!" Matsumoto grumbled. "Why do we have to repeat this anti-sealing spell so many times?"

"Aww don't complain!" Tayomi sighed. "It's really important. Captain-Commander Yamamoto's orders! So you have to do it!"

Tayomi stood on the top of the cliff in Urahara's private training grounds, watching her comrades practice the anti-sealing spell she had created repeatedly. Most of them were getting the hang of thins, which made her glad to see. Hitsugaya and most of the Captains had mastered it quickly and joined her in watching the others practice. Tayomi felt more settled knowing that they were progressing well. However, part of her was still worried about the promise she had made. Hitsugaya knew nothing of the truth and she knew she could not back out of their promise all of a sudden, without him questioning her. It was a little wrong, but perhaps this would allow him to have a little bit of hope and hold on to the very end.

Regardless of whether or not she would be there to see it.

Tayomi leaned against the wall, with her guitar on her lap, strumming the strings listlessly. She still felt bugged by the fact that she had given a promise she could not truly make. But hearing those words made her so happy… Too happy. Running her fingers through her hair and closing her eyes, Tayomi listened closely to the swirling night breeze. Her heart was hurting. And there was nothing she could do about it, because doing something about it would probably hurt him more.

"Hey."

Tayomi opened her eyes and was greeted by the sight of spiky black hair, a '69' tattoo and three long scars.

"Oh… Shuu-kun."

"Hitsugaya asked me to come up and check on you. He said you only come up here when you're upset and well… Given your circumstances with the Captain-Commander, I guess he can't exactly ask you straight out right?"

Tayomi sighed, putting down her guitar and burying her face in her hands.

"Aww Shuu-kun, I wished I could tell all of you what was going on! But I can't! I can't I can't I can't! But I know the truth is going to hurt everybody, especially Susu-chan!"

Seeing his childhood friend in such a distraught state, Hisagi sighed and gave her a tight hug.

"It's alright. Just cry everything out."

Tayomi sobbed, gripping his arms tightly and screaming into his shoulder. Her tears poured down her face freely, and it seemed as if it would not be stopping any time soon. She felt so weak and helpless, having to hurt those around her knowingly. Going forward, dealing with the future was already so difficult, especially when she knew that it would not be so bright for her.

AUTHOR'S NOTE:
Omg guys I'm so so sorry for this horribly late update! As warned in my previous chapter, I'm really busy with school and I hardly have time for anything else :( But I do want to finish this story, the ending has been planned out in my head from the start and I want to be able to write out this ending for all of you who have been following/reading this story.

So things are getting a bit crazy in this story, Hitsugaya is acting impulsively here and Tayomi's secret won't be revealed yet. But it will be soon! Next chapter will be a bit of a time skip and we'll launch straight into the main battle against Aizen and his last New Espada, Viquierra! It's time to finish things once and for all with Aizen!

Please rate and comment! Thank you for being patient and reading this :)