I didn't know how much time has passed and I didn't care. The last thing on my mind was time. I knew it was up for me and now, I was simply wanting to enjoy what was happening. My legs and arms came back, I was sitting up in the back seat, watching the scenery go by. It was completely dark outside and the snow was falling gently. We haven't spoken a word to each other as he drove us to our place.

I always thought that I was going to be alone when my time came, just like that night on the roof. However, I was thankful Takashi was here with me. I tried to tell myself it was going to be okay but I was still scared. I didn't know what was beyond death and the thought was frightening. It made me feel a bit better knowing someone was with me.

The car stopped silently, Takashi got out first, opening the door for me. I went to slide my legs over to get out but couldn't move. They were visible again but nothing I did made them want to budge from the leather seats. I looked up to him, frowning from my condition. He knew something was wrong and turned around, getting on one knee so I could grab onto his back. I was able to move my arms and hands, wrapping them around his neck. He lifted me up gently, grabbing both of my legs so it was easier to carry me.

I buried my face into his neck, smelling his hair, the crisp smell of pine drowned my senses; it made my mind ease as he moved into the trees. We couldn't get to our place by car anymore but I didn't complain. Being close to him brought me peace. I never realized how he made me feel before. The feeling inside me wasn't just tranquility but something else entirely. The more I pondered on it, the more I couldn't figure out what it was. I decided not to dwell on it longer as we got closer to the location.

"May I ask you a question?" His voice broke through the silent darkness. I couldn't see anything around us but the shape of the trees. I'm surprised Takashi knew where he was going. He must go to this place a lot to be able to navigate through the dark.

I felt his fingers tighten around my thighs, "Of course..." I managed to say.

"Will you be okay?"

Will I? I didn't fully know the answer. It was time for me to go and where I was going, I had no idea. If there was a heaven, would I end up there? Did I even have a right to be around angels and live in paradise? No, I killed myself. I committed a crime if there was a god out there. I deserved to burn from what I've done and how I've hurt those around me.

Silently, I hoped that there wouldn't be anything beyond death. Perhaps, I would just fade away into nothing, like I never existed in the first place. I liked that idea much more than being in heaven. If I was to fully disappear, then I could no longer drag anyone into my crazy world. I would have full harmony and nothing would hurt me. Even if I wished for it, the thought was still terrifying.

Shifting my head, I made it easier for him to hear me. "I'll be fine," The words brought not only his comfort but mine as well. Saying those words were better than facing the unknown.

He didn't say anything else.

We finally arrived at the small abandoned park, he sat me down on an old bench. He sat right next to me, not knowing what to do next. We both didn't know what to do. The only thing we could do was watch the snow and listen to the night sounds around us. I loved it. This was what I wanted, to be able to disappear somewhere that I could rest. My body was becoming numb and it wasn't from the cold. I decided to lean my head on Takashi's shoulder and listen to his breathing.

"What is today?" I asked.

He shifted, but being careful not to move me, "It's March 3rd."

"That's funny..." I wanted to laugh at how similar this night was compared to the night when I took my life. It was snowing, it was dark and probably around the same time as well. I felt the snowflakes land on my eyelashes as I blinked. The difference was that I couldn't see the lights of people's homes and the feeling of being crushed by everything around me. This time, I felt light, like nothing could go wrong.

"You know, I almost made it to spring. It would have been nice to see the flowers." I said.

He lowered his head, looking at me from the corner of his eyes but I didn't look at him. "What do you mean?" He was growing curious and despite asking questions, I didn't mind. He had a right to know but I didn't have time to explain everything so I began talking.

"I've done something terrible, Takashi. But now that I think about it, I don't regret it. If I hadn't have done it, then the ways things are now would have never happened. Tamaki and I would have never been friends, we wouldn't have met. He taught me something that I'll never forget. Tamaki taught me how to love and what it was like to lose something. I think...I would have fallen in love with him if I didn't see him with Haruhi that day but everything happens for a reason. Even though my feelings were crushed that day, it brought the feeling of loss and I'm happy I got to experience what that felt like while I had the chance."

"He cared for you a lot," He spoke.

"I know, we're friends." The word 'friends' made a smile spread on my lips, "If I was still alive then I would have never made any friends, I wouldn't have gotten to know Oten and Tomo. I would have never gotten to feel what it was to laugh and enjoy being around someone else. They let me feel love and happiness in a way that I can't describe." I touched his hand, letting his smooth skin fuel my words, "Of course, I'm glad to have met you and the other Host's."

"The first day you showed up to the club," Takashi looked past the snow, his eyes focusing on something else entirely, " Even though we sat in silence, I've felt something different from you. Was this it?"

I couldn't help but chuckle, "You always knew when something was off."

He tilted his head, confused on why I was laughing.

"Thank you for never asking questions, even though I knew you were bothered every time I showed up and had to keep silent but none the less, thank you." Looking down I saw my old scars start to appear on my arms and how pale I was becoming; my skin was starting to become as white as the snow around us. It reminded me of my past and how cruel it was.

"You know... My mother wasn't the nicest person. She made me do things I didn't want too. I understand she only wanted what was best for me but sometimes, I swore she wanted what was best for her." I sighed, "I would have remained under my Mother's thumb till the day she died. I would have graduated, go to a college she chose, married someone of status so it would make her look better. My entire life would have evolved around her and I would have never done anything to change it. However, I couldn't take it anymore. I couldn't stand living a life that wasn't mine. My life was taken from my Mother so I took it back the only way I could think, I decided to get it back by dying."

Takashi couldn't sit still anymore, he turned, grabbing me by my shoulders. He looked confused and worried, like something bad was about to happen. I wanted to tell him that everything was going to be fine but deep down it wasn't, not for him at least. He was going to be hurt from this, that was something I had no control over.

"What are you trying to say? What do you mean?"

I touched his cheek, trying to help him feel that I was still here with him. He touched my hand, holding onto me tightly. I could only smile as I placed my head on his lap, he didn't object as I put his hand on my heart. His eyes widened when he didn't feel anything. "Don't be afraid, everything will be alright. I wanted this from the very beginning." He stared at me as my body began to glow. Looking at our hands, mine was enveloped in an odd gold glow, my time to go was now.

I decided to continue.

"I chose to kill myself and even though sometimes I regret it, dying was something that changed me in the end. It made me into a better person, I'm thankful for the opportunities killing myself brought. I know death should be something I should despise, be afraid of, but that I'm glad I went through with it."

"You can't be..." He stopped when he knew a heartbeat was never going to meet his palm on my chest. Denying the truth was something he couldn't do and he accepted my fate with a frown, running his free hand through my black hair. It felt good... Disappearing like this didn't feel so scary.

I noticed warmth seep into my hand from his and I almost started crying, it's been so long since I've felt the pure heat of human contact. It was like I was alive again and having someone touch me felt like heaven. After the warm from his body seeped into me, I could feel the cold from the snow. It was so foreign to me and yet so welcoming.

It was hard to believe I was still dead.

With the feeling of being alive returning to me, a question popped into my head. What was all this for? Why did I have to go through all this? Was there a reason for me to have remained on this earth? Perhaps, I'll never get an answer. Maybe, this was all a dream and when I'm gone, I'll wake up to when everything was perfect. When I was young in my Mother and Father's arms. Takashi squeezing my hand tightly brought me from my thoughts, he was nervous as the golden glow spread from my hands to the rest of my body.

Takashi, for once, was easy to read. He was scared and he wanted me to know it or he would have never let me through his mask. There was nothing I could do to help take that fear away from him. All I could was remain on his lap for the remainder of my time. I could feel slight trembling from his hand as he ran his fingers through my tangled hair. His eyes landed on my arms, making them widen even more. He moved away from my frozen heart and ran a smooth finger over the marks on my skin. He cringed at how thick the scars were, hating the fact I had proof from my hard life.

"If only I knew how much pain you were in..." He spoke, trying to remain calm.

I sighed, "I'm okay now. Everything leads me to this moment. It was simply a step I had to take. Thank you though, it's nice to hear." I could feel the warmth spread to my body and legs. I didn't need to look to know it was almost time. I slowly got off him, standing up like my body was air. It felt like I could float away into the grey skies. Takashi joined me as I approached the tree, staring at the red ornament. Seeing the small red orb brought me peace, it was nice to see that something resembled a piece of me on this earth.

I turned to Takashi, grabbing both of his cold hands. Staring into his dark eyes, I smiled brightly, "Can you do me a favor?" He nodded, his words lost in the wind. "Please, watch over my sister, Seika. We haven't been close for long but I'm sure she'll blame herself for my disappearance. I want her to be happy so please, make sure she is okay."

"I will." He said, his tone getting rid of any doubt.

The golden glow started to fade off into the wind, mixing in with the snowflakes, making the area shine beautifully. I watched with amazement, who knew this moment would be so peaceful, so breathtaking. Even Takashi was taken back by the scenery around us, it was something you would see in a fairy tale. The golden specks around us lit everything, making the old playground come to life. I wish I could have had more time to admire the astonishing mix of golden snow but it was time for me to go. My body was almost see-through, with every golden orb that left my body, it became more transparent.

Takashi got closer to me, gripping at whatever was left of my hands. His warm breath felt like heaven as he spoke, "Can I do one thing?"

"Always the gentleman," I laughed.

He gently placed a kiss on my forehead.

There was nothing for us to say anymore. We were content and whatever fear he had was gone, he continued to hold my hands until it happened. The gold specks that floated around eventually faded, becoming one with the night sky. The playground was no longer full of life and beauty, it was dark and cold as it has always been. The only sound was the wind of winter, licking Takashi's ears as he stood there. His hands no longer holding onto anything, his dark iris's landing on the small red ornament. It happened so fast but yet, it felt like an eternity. He could only stand there alone, not wanting the lingering warmth to leave his palms.

Hara was gone.