For The Love Of Merlin! – The Wedding
What have I become?
My sweetest friend
Everyone I know
Goes away in the end
You could have it all
My empire of dirt
I will let you down
I will make you hurt
Hurt – Nine Inch Nails
Saturday September 12th 1998
"Wow, I seriously can't wait until I get to have a baby, just look at how nice your girls look in that dress! If that is what I have to look forward to then I am so in! I'm so glad that I won't be forever stuck with a B cup... Well, I hope they stay big after having a baby." said Cho as she stepped into her beautiful yet simple pure white dress with Ginny's and Hermione's help.
"I'm sure Ginny would trade you on a heartbeat, they might be pretty to look at, but my mother told me they hurt like hell while pregnant." Commented Hermione nonchalantly, "and yes, hopefully they might stay that way after you have a child."
"You know, harry always told me he wanted a big family, and I always did as well. He would always be talking about how we should have babies right away, but now he's been saying how maybe waiting would be a better option…"
"Have you talked to him about this?" asked Hermione who looked up puzzled from the small ribbon she was wrapping around Cho's waist, "I mean, I'm sure he has a good reason to have changed his mind; even if it's something I never thought he would do."
"He said that it would be best if we got to 'enjoy our married life first,' I would love to do that as well, but we already had a plan… and he knows how bad I wanted to have a baby. I swear if he changes his mind about having babies I will kill him!"
"Oh, don't worry, I'm sure he is just nervous. As long as he's not too nervous for your wedding night then you will be alright!" laughed Hermione as she handed Cho a small glass of champagne, took one for herself, and gave Ginny one with pumpkin juice since she was not allowed to drink anything with alcohol on it.
"Oh I sure hope so! I'm actually really nervous, since it will be our first time together. Since we're both virgins I'm really hoping it doesn't end in tragedy!" Cho said in a hushed voice, which unfortunately enough happened when Ginny decided to drink some of her pumpkin juice; so the little redhead ended up coughing out her drink all over the place, barely missing the bride. "for the love of Merlin, are you alright Ginny?!"
But the redhead kept coughing, waving the girls away, signaling them both to back away. Her face was red like her hair, and her eyes had gotten watery from all of the coughing. When it finally stopped, she looked up to Hermione, who was offering a cup of cold water and giving her an inquisitive look.
"uh- Sorry- morning sickness…" said Ginny after she drank some of the water. In reality, she found it rather amusing that harry hadn't told Cho about their little affair, if that's what it could be called. "please, do continue what you were telling us…"
"well, I'm sure most boys know the – uhh – basics, of what it is like to have intercourse," coughed Hermione as she blushed and fixed Ginny's hair, "I mean, I'm sure that after being friends with Ronald for so long, Harry cannot possibly be ignorant in the – umm – ways of the flesh."
Cho looked pensive for a moment as she fiddled with her massive engagement ring, then she looked up and looked at both girls with a nervous smile.
"Well, even if he is not experienced, it will still be special. Maybe that is what makes it so. I am extremely glad that we could both remain pure until marriage… I mean, yeah it was hard to wait, especially for him. There was even a time when I thought that he would end up cheating on me with some trollop because I was not giving him what he wanted. But we both knew exactly what we wanted. I mean, I just know how disappointed he would have been if I had given myself to someone before marriage! No one likes broken goods."
"Yeah, I guess you are right. It does suck to be, as you so eloquently call it, broken goods." Shame and anger bubbled inside Ginny's stomach as she spoke, "I loved and still love the man who I gave myself to, even if he doesn't want to take responsibility of this baby. It's fine with me though, because I know that in this life what you give, you get back."
"Oh Ginny, I didn't mean to –" said Cho, she looked genuinely sorry.
"Don't worry Cho, I know you didn't mean t offend me," smiled Ginny as she looked down and fiddled with the silk ribbon on her dress. "I just hope that he is happy with the life he chose. Even if I am going to stick through this alone, I'm not going to let that put me down, or ruin his life, he deserves to be happy."
"You deserve to be happy as well, I hope you know that. And you won't be alone sweetheart, you have your family with you, you have Harry and me as well. I know that you feel as if you are getting in the way by staying with us, but we are happy to have you around, and when the baby comes, we will be happy to have the little angel as well! It will be great practice for once Harry and I have our own little ones." Said Cho as she held Ginny's hand in between hers.
It was a bittersweet moment for Ginny, because she knew that her child would be born without a father to look up to, she would be looked down upon by the other members of the magical community; they would never have the same protection or respect that the other families. Friend of Harry Potter or not, she would be frowned upon for having a child out of wedlock. All of that would be fine though, because Harry would be happy with Cho, which made her happy. He deserved to be happy, Harry had gone through so much pain and suffering, she couldn't take the one good thing to ever happen to him.
"thank you Cho, it really means a lot to me," said Ginny with a tearful smile, "now let's finish getting you ready, you have a wedding to get to."
The wedding was a small but elaborate affair. The bridesmaids were Ginny, Hermione, and Katie Bell. They wore knee length airy empire cut dresses, the dresses were a light peachy color, and they were required to wear a crown of wild flowers on their heads. The maid of honor was Marietta Edgecombe, her dress was the same cut and length, but it was a light blue instead of peach. Marietta gave Hermione a dirty look as they waited outside the church, the boys (Ron as the best man. Neville, Fred and George were the groomsmen) had gone in already as well as Katie. Ginny waited for her cue to walk in, as did Hermione.
"How did you manage to get the birds away from your hair Granger? I mean, that's all it needs right now to look like an actual nest." Sneered Marietta.
"I don't know it's a mystery. Anyway, what kind of makeup are you wearing anyway, Marietta? I mean, you can't really see that many scars on your face anymore. It looks like it will work well on flawless skin. Lucky me, I never had acne while in school." Smiled Hermione, then turned and walked in the church with a bright smile on her face as Marietta's face twisted from a sneer into an ugly angry frown.
"What are you laughing at Weasley?" hissed the angry girl as she looked at Ginny's smug smile.
"The beauty in life Edgecombe, the beauty in life." Said Ginny as she walked in the church, her head help up high and a smile on her face. This might be the worst day so far, the father of her unborn child was going to marry another woman, and she couldn't change that. She would let him be happy because he deserved it, and she would try her best to be happy for him. Even if his happiness meant that she would be alone.
The small church was full of flowers, they were everywhere, on the ceiling on the seats, on the windows… The smell of them was filling Harry's nostrils, it reminded him of funerals, it shouldn't, but it did anyway.
Great way to start a marriage: lies, impregnating one of the bridesmaids and thinking the church smells like a funeral, the recipe for a perfect marriage! Thought Harry as he waited up by the altar, his face reflecting his anxiousness as he waited for his bride to enter the church, the poor girl who was being fooled into marrying a liar and a fraud of a boy.
In reality, he had been having cold feet about getting married the past couple of days, for fourteen days and a few hours to be exact. It started when Ginny went to the hospital. Since then his mind was filled with thoughts of a certain redhead and their unborn child. He felt like a coward for not stepping up and saying something when her parents shouted at her at the hospital, he should have done something. It was half his fault anyway. The words could not leave his mouth, and everything he did felt forced. He felt as if her family would find out that he had been the one to impregnate their only girl. Harry had watched Ginny sit there and not bat an eyelash as her family shouted at her, she took all the blame and silently let her family belittle her and call her things that he never thought could come out of their mouths. At some point, they asked her who was the father of the child she was having, that's when Harry almost fainted on the spot. He waited for her to give him away, to tell them that it was his baby, to take some of the blame away from her and give it to someone else. That never happened.
"I refuse to force someone to be with me for the sole reason that I'm having his child," said Ginny stubbornly as tears filled her eyes, "he is not ignorant of this situation, and I know that if he was willing to be with me and this child he would have done something about it. But he hasn't. There is no point in make someone pay for someone that they didn't want any more than I did. I know that he is with someone else and I refuse to ruin that, not for his sake, but for the sake of the woman with him."
Her words stung, at that moment he was tempted to speak and take all the blame on himself. The only thing that stopped him was the fact that his fiancée was right next to him. She was the one person, other than Hermione, who seemed to be genuinely worried about Ginny. Ginny, sweet little Ginny. What am I going to do about her? Thought Harry as the music started.
The doors of the church opened and the bridal party glided in. First, it was Katie Bell, smiling shyly as she walked down the aisle to her designated spot. The next one was Hermione, his sister in all but blood. She looked beautiful in a way that only she could, shiny and bouncy curls replaced her untamed fluffy hair, her smile was contagious, and the devious glint in her eye that he had learned to be wary of was in place as well. The next one was Ginny and God she looked radiant. Her skin had a healthy glow to it, and even though her hair seemed to clash with the color of her dress, it worked perfectly on her. She had fashioned her hair in the way Hermione's was, but since it was naturally straight the tight curls had loosened up, making it look wavy and shiny. The crown of flowers on her hair made her look like a fairy princess of some sorts. Her smile was beautiful, and as she walked down the aisle, Harry wished that she could be the one wearing the white dress. As she got closer, he noticed the things that no one else did, like how her brilliant smile did not meet her eyes. She looked tired and sad, but who could blame her, the father of her child was about to marry some other girl and she was being forced to watch from the first row.
He had been caught up looking at Ginny that he didn't even notice when Marietta, the best friend of his future wife, had made her way up the altar with a fake smile plastered on her face. He didn't even notice Cho was in the room until she was half way down the aisle.
If someone asked him to describe Cho with one word, he would have said HAPPY. She had the biggest smile he had ever seen on her face, her thick black hair had been twisted into some kind of complicated knot and the veil was in place. Her dress was pure white and had beads and pearls all over the place. It wrapped around her upper body and thighs and it fanned out at around the same area where her knees would be. She kind of looks like a mermaid with that dress, he thought as she stepped in front of him.
With one last look at Ginny, he could see that she still had her brave little smile on her face, but her eyes were now glistening. They were full of tears, tears of disappointment, anger, helplessness, and sorrow. This was his last chance to turn away from what he had planned and to do the right thing, this was the point of no return. He turned his eyes to Cho, her eyes were full of hope and her smile as vibrant as always. She was radiating happiness. He turned to Ginny one more time and saw the tears go slowly down her cheeks, he saw her small lips mouth something. Marry her, she said. So he did.
I wear this crown of shit
Upon my liar's chair
Full of broken thoughts
I cannot repair
Beneath the stains of time
The feelings disappear
You are someone else
I am still right here
Hurt – Nine Inch Nails