We eat our lunch at our normal table, and Koden tells us he feels like eating in his room, I find it strange. Then I realise maybe he has somewhere more important to be; and I cannot judge him because I gave the same excuse when Rey was in my room.
I stare past Poe; towards the door as I watch the two yellow creatures walk into the dining hall and sit in a shadowy corner, speaking in their native language.

"What's the matter?" I direct my attention back to Poe who looks at me with a concerned but almost knowing expression.

"Poe, I can't stay here..." I whisper quietly to him even though we are alone at the table.

"I know," Poe smiles weakly at me; I know he feels our friendship as deeply as I do, but I'm surprised by his reaction. "I know," he repeats again quietly.

"I can't help you, I'm next to useless here and I'm only a target. The First Order will search for me; retribution runs like blood through their ranks..." I try to make him understand, although I feel he already does.

"You heard about the cargo freighter, didn't you?" I nod my head, "I'll see what I can do," he stands up from the table.

"What do you mean?" I am baffled by his response.

"I'll get you a spot on that ship," He pulls his lips together in a kind smile.

"Really? Poe, thank you," I say with true sincerity, I feel guilty for being happy about his promise.

"Anything for you, Finn," as soon as he starts to walk down the corridor, BB-8 appears from the opposite direction and trails after him.

I stay in the hall until closing, sitting in the quiet knowing I do not fit in here, it always was a temporary sanctuary; yet I feel I'd be welcome if I returned.
I do not turn the light on when I enter my room; I just remove my clothes and put on some of the night attire before sliding under the sheets. Tossing and turning only to have what little sleep I can acquire broken by nightmares and memories.

I wake to see a small folded piece of paper on the carpet by the door.

Finn,
I have bargained with the pilots of the freighter and they have agreed to deliver you to the outer rim: they leave this afternoon.
Thank you for your contribution to the
resistance.
Yours sincerely

- General Organa.

I slowly pack my small bag, taking the clothes from in the wardrobe, a blaster and the large weapon Han Solo had so generously giving me. Lying Poe's jacket across the top, I zip it up and swing it over my shoulder. I stand in the door way and take a brief look back into my room: recalling the first time I walked in. Rey's fragile body curled under the sheets. I cannot help but wonder how long she was planning to leave without telling me; the thought causes a strange tingling of betrayal, which is overridden by a gnawing sadness. I can no longer look back, so I turn and close the door. As I walk out I almost bump into Poe.
"I'll miss seeing you around, buddy," he says immediately.

"I'll miss you too," Poe gently wraps his arms around me, and I him, and we embrace in the middle of the corridor, my bag getting slightly in the way of us.

"I better go, I'm already late for another meeting," He sounds unimpressed and starts to walk away, "I'll tell BB-8 you'll miss him,' he calls back with a laugh, it fades away with the distance but I can't help but keep smiling.

I am standing at the door leading to the hangars when I realise I had forgotten to do something very important.
I rush back through the corridors, my bag large swinging, and knocking into the walls, and passers-by. The doors slides open and I slow my pace to a fast stroll, and approach the desk. "Have you seen nurse Starla?" I ask, the droid directs me to where she is staring at a large book on the counter.

"Starla," I call out to her, she looks up in my direction, smiles and paces over to me.

"What are you doing here?" She enquires, stepping us out of the way of a large gurney, and into an unoccupied room.

"I am… I- I mean, I can't stay here" I stutter over the words, and she smiles and closes her eyes, nodding slowly.

"I was waiting for this," she admits, opening her eyes which are soft and caring.

"What do you mean?"

"I knew you wouldn't stay around forever, I could see it in your eyes," what is it with me and my eyes… I wonder to myself.

"Well, I came to say thank you for everything you have done for me," her smile fades, and she sighs, "You've been so helpful and I don't think I-" she cuts me off.

"Don't, you don't have to say that. Finn, you're strong and you would have been just fine without me," my lips turn up in a half smile. Starla takes a step closer to me, and I feel my heart skip anxiously, "I don't say this but-" she steps up on her tiptoes, bringing herself considerably closer to my height, "you're welcome," I hold my breath as she closes the space between us. I relax as her lips press lightly to my cheek in such an innocent and kind way; she places her heels on the ground.

"I better go. I couldn't have had a better nurse," Her eyes sparkle at my complement, "Goodb-" Starla has become as bad as me when it comes to interrupting.

"Don't say it," She demands, her eyes lose their shine. I feel as if there is a lot more to Starla than I ever discovered.
She walks out of the room and does not look back at me before returning to her reading.

The warm sun dances across my skin as I walk out into the loading dock. I look to the edge of the forest the Millennium Falcon stationary in its usual position, and I am again reminded of Rey, I try my best to ignore it by looking for my transport. I see a small freighter and I introduce myself to the two aliens that will be my delivers. Obviously seeing me as just another piece of cargo they are not interested in who I am; shuffling me on board and pointing with crooked, yellow fingers through a door. I tentively walk in, waiting for them to switch on a light, which they do not do. The larger alien closes the door just as I sit on a small box beside a large crate. I'm plummeted into an abysmal darkness once the door seals shut. Unable to see my own hands in the blackness I begin to lose all sense of myself and it causes severe disorientation.
I feel the uneasy motion of the ship lifts into the air. A loud bang and growling hiss of the unseeable creature next to me causes me to jump back. I close my eyes, my personal darkness is a lot more comforting compared to the one I am surrounded by.