Crazy trouble with love
DNAmy and Ron
Series: Kim Possible
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"Aw man Rufus, I can't believe we have to come here." sighed Ron walking to a building. Said building had something that Ron hate more than 'No Taco Fridays'.
Cuddle Buddy Convention.
"Uh huh." nodded the naked mole rat.
"How was I supposed to know that I got those VIP passess in the mail!" He moaned while remembering how he found a package with a no return address on it in his mailbox last week. "Next time I'm just gonna give them to Kim, no questions asked."
"Uh huh." Rufus nodded in agreement as they entered a room covered in Gorillapigs. Ron pushed past them and entered a large area brimming with people and dozens upon hundreds of Cuddle Buddys.
Just as he tried to walk one step, Rufus was stolen by a kid that thought it was a ratworm or something.
"Hey!" cried Ron running after the kid. "Rufus!"
"Yea! I got a wormcow!" The child said while grabbing a woman's bag and caused her to trip onto Ron.
Ron groaned as the woman on top of him rubbed her head. "Ow."
"That hurt." Said the woman while looking for something. "Where are those specks?"
Ron was confused before seeing a pair of glasses and grabbed them before holding them up to her. "These them?"
"Yes. Thank you young man." She smiled before putting the glasses on her face. She got off Ron and held a hand out. "Need some help getting up?"
Ron nodded while having a small blush plastered on his face. He took the moment to look at the older woman as he got to his feet. The woman was black haired and had an pseudo hourglass figure that showed of her curves. Her red sweater was hanging around her waist like a small jacket covering a little of her blue jeans. Her white shirt had something unexpected. A picture of an Otterfly reading a book.
"Heh, you'll have to excuse some kids, they really get into this stuff." she smiled.
"Yea. And one of them stole my best friend." Ron's eyes widened. "Ah! I gotta get him back!"
"Hello." The naked mole rat said while on top of the woman's head.
"Is this him?" she smiled gently picking up the rodent and holding him out to Ron.
"Rufus!"
"Aw." The mole rat smiled while jumping onto Ron's head and looked at the woman in confusion.
"But how did you get free from that kid?" asked Ron looking at his buddy.
Rufus smiled while pointing to a security guard that was holding the child by his shirt and dragged him away. Then he turned to the woman and scratched his head, pondering.
"So cute." The woman smiled while petting the rodent. "And so pink."
"Yup, you're looking at the best and smartest naked mole rat." boasted Ron. "Oh! Sorry, I'm Ron Stoppable, and you are Miss…."
"R...RNAnna." She smiled while looking at Ron. "Did you get a package? If you did blame my poor penmanship."
"Uh yeah. Wait, did you try to send that to my friend? Are you the one who organized this?" he asked.
"Maybe. And no that was my cousin." She said while smiling. "She organized this event as part of her parole."
"Parole? What'd she do? Stealing? Hit N Run?"
"Genetic experiments on humans."
Ron's eyes widened as Rufus squeaked. "Uh, you mean she messed with people and their insides?"
"Somewhat, she….liked turning other animals into chimeras. Her last one was a human/monkey hybrid." She said while looking at a wall. "It was not pretty."
"M-Monkey." spoke Ron in fear while Rufus tapped his head and squeaked before jumping up and down flailing his arms.
"You're afraid of monkeys? That's strange, I thought you were afraid of aliens or killer robots like most of your age group."
"Trust me, I've seen the evil in monkeys." he spoke in a serious tone, even though what he said is something most would laugh at. Then he looked at Rufus who seemed like something was on his mind.
"Monkey girl, eep!"
That's when it clicked. "Wait, is your cousin known as...DNAmy?"
"Yes. And your name is….really cute." She chuckled. "And so are you."
That made Ron blush and chuckle while rubbing his cheek. "Heh...well...thanks."
RNAnna then pondered something before laughing. "You would make the luckiest girl alive happy as their boyfriend! Even I would love to be that girl!"
"Heh, me? Nah nah, I'm more of the sidekick kinda guy ya know? But the Ron man is pretty popular with the ladies." he grinned trying to lean on a stand before slipping and fell down. "I meant to do that."
"I know." She laughed. "But seriously, you're more a hero then you think." she walked over and helped him up again. "In fact, why don't we hang out? If you came here, even if it's not you, why not hang out with someone who knows her way huh?"
"Well my friend Kim is currently at a cheerleader practice and she couldn't come."
"Well like I said, you can take this chance to look around and see just why so many people love them." She smiled before grabbing a monkeycat. "Please touch it, it won't bite."
Ron looked at it with fear and gulped. "Uh, no thanks. I'm good."
"I insist. Plus if you touch it I'll be happy." RNAnna smiled while looking at Ron with a cute expression.
Ron blushed and even Rufus found it hard to resist with the mole rat running up to Ron's shoulder and patted him and said something before pointing to the plushy.
"You're right, it would be evil if I denied a cute girl's request." He said touching the plushy. Only for it to mew like a newborn kitten and purr.
"See? Now try to hug it." she insisted.
Ron nodded before hugging the monkeycat and causing it to purr louder while a little song called, 'Kung Fu Fighting' played from its insides. "Heh, you know it's not so bad really." Just then a heart came out of its mouth and it produced a message.
'Never give up on love'
He looked at it confused while RNAnna clapped. "Come on, there's more of the convention to see."
"Gah!" Ron said as RNAnna grabbed him and pulled him towards some booths. Rufus held on from the sudden move.
"Come on! The octomonkies are just this way." She smiled. "And you're paying for them too, handsome."
He blushed at the compliment while Rufus gave him a thumbs up.
"Oh! There's a monkeycat with a ninja outfit here!" She giggled while holding a monkey with a black uniform and cat ears.
"Ah! Ninja Monkey!" Ron jumped back with a fighting stance.
"It's just a monkeycat." RNAnna laughed. "There is no such thing as a monkey ninja."
"Oh yes there are! I've fought against them. And trust me, they are evil!"
"Really? So you are an animal abuser." She glared. "Now that is evil of you, especially since you have a cute pet."
"Woah hold on." he raised his hands. "These are monkeys who serve this weird dude called Monkey Fist, someone your cousin may or may not have a crush on."
"Oh him." She glared. "The over obsessed monkey Kung fu expert….he was an idiot that's ungrateful for my cousin's attempts to help him with his stupid miss interpretations of ancient texts!"
Ron gulped and saw the woman fume. "Wow, you really must not like the guy. Think of it this way, at least you're not with a guy like that."
"Yea…." She looked away. "But let's go! The chickenpigs are this way and they shoot tacos from their mouths!"
"You had me at tacos." he grinned feeling hungry.
"Just don't eat too much. I don't want that handsome figure to get bloated. Kind of like my cousin after she ate too much nacos when she was a teen." RNAnna smiled while rubbing Ron's head.
"Wait, she ate nachos too? I thought I was the one who invented them." deflated Ron.
"Well she did eat over 500 buckets of them one time. She was in the bathroom for 21 hours."
'Wow, good thing I can't reach that high.'
"Oh she also likes looking at tacos in the shape of chickens being eaten by...well me. She really wanted me hooked." She blushed. "Luckily I stick to a more veggie diet."
"Like? Garlic?" Ron said confused. "Because you don't smell bad, heck you smell really good!"
"Thanks, but I mean like lettuce and carrots mostly. I'll eat meat, but I don't go nuts on it."
"Oh. So you don't like bacon tacos…." He said while feeling a little disappointed.
"Well no, but there's nothing wrong with eating that stuff. But if you go nuts on that, it could really cause heart problems."
This caused Ron to pale as he realized his eating habits consequences on his body.
"But that heart of yours is in good hands." She grinned. "My hands."
"What do you mean?"
"Well. Since we are comparable, we can you know…" She blushed a little. "Become boyfriend and girlfriend. But if you don't want to, I understand."
Ron looked at her in shock. "Boyfriend….and...G-Girlfriend?"
"Yea." She grinned. "Plus, how many girls do you know that actually wants to be around you?"
"Uh, well a few, but I never really had a girlfriend." he admitted rubbing his neck.
"...small world." She smiled. "I never had a boyfriend." she reached out and held his hand. "Wanna give it a shot?"
"Sure. If you…. Um...really want to.." Ron blushed.
"If you don't mind….having a criminal's cousin as your girlfriend." She blushed.
"Nah, heck between you and me, I think my friend might have a crush on one of the bad guys we fight." he whispered.
"Which one and who is this girl?" She whispered back. "If you don't mind me asking?"
"Well you familiar with Kim Possible?"
"The girl that kicked my cousin's' butt while holding off an...experiment of her's?" She frowned a little.
"Yeah, well she might have a thing for Shego, green lady with glowing hands." he spoke cautiously.
"Oh you mean the former superhero lesbian? My cousin loves talking about how Shego wanted to 'fist' herself inside 'Kimmy's pussy?" She blushed while emphasizing the words with her fingers.
Ron blushed while Rufus shook his head to not imagine the pictures.
"Oh and she also said that Shego once had sex with a full sized 'Kimmy' doll." RNAnna blushed. "In the lab...and covered in...whipped cream."
"Alright! Too much info!" he spoke with a blush and waved his hands. 'Maybe I should NOT mention that to Kim, or maybe I should.'
"No need to yell. Oh." She grinned. "Shego also told my cousin that she started having cameras installed in her clothes that would lock onto 'Kimmy' and watch her...personal life."
'So need to tell her that one.'
"And she said that Shego nearly had an orgasnm from looking at 'Kimmy' doing her acrobatics." RNAnna blushed. "Though neither of us understood the reason why she would do that."
"Uh…." spoke Ron who didn't know what to say. 'Say something dummy!'
"Are you ok Ronny monkey?"
"Uh, yeah. So what we were saying before this got…..mature?" he asked with a blush.
"Oh? Did you just look at your new girlfriend in a bunny suit~" she giggled.
"No!" he cried out with a blush.
"About the girlfriend or the bunny suit part." She frowned.
"Girlfriend, I mean bunny suit, I mean...gah!" he groaned.
"Um Ronny…." She smiled slightly. "There's a monkey ninja chicken behind you eating a taco."
"Not funny." he spoke in a deadpanned tone.
"Eep eep!" Said a monkey ninja in a chicken outfit while having a half eaten banana taco. "Eep eep!"
"AHH!" Ron screamed jumping in RNAnna's arms. "See? Evil monkey ninja!"
"Ah monkey!" squeaked Rufus going in Ron's pocket.
"Eep?" It said while looking at Ron confused before giving him a thumbs up as it walked away.
"Ronny….you can get off me now." RNAnna said while blushing at the close proximity of Ron's body against her arms.
Ron blinked and sheepishly got off. "Heh, sorry."
"It's fine." She blushed. "You're cute when you're scared." She then hugged Ron against her breasts. "Like it? All natural and just for you Ronny~"
'S….Soft.' he thought with a brighter blush and a slight nosebleed.
"Amazing right? Well I'm the more endowed cousin compared to your friends enemy."
'So true.'
"And secretly." She whispered. "DNAmy started getting this crazy idea of drinking more milk to get a bigger chest."
"I thought they got big naturally?"
"Well. Not exactly...she created some new form of milk that only affected the breasts. And as you saw the last time you saw my cousin, her breasts are bigger than before." RNAnna blushed. "Maybe I should ask her to give me some?"
"Well, they look alright to me." he admitted.
"Even if they are an E-cup?" She blushed redder.
'E-Cup!?' he thought with an even bigger blush.
"Well, actually they are EE-cups." She chuckled. "You wouldn't tell from the…" She whispered the last part in his ear. "Training bra."
Ron covered his nose trying not to think too hard.
"Ronny?" She said in concern. "Are you ok? You look redder than a chilly pepper."
"I...I'll be alright." 'Once I get home and in my room.'
"Great!" She grinned. "Let's get some food, my treat...if you want?"
"Uh sure, lead the way."
"Ok Ronny~" she smiled while walking towards the cafeteria. "Tacos or pizza? Or maybe a salad?"
"Uh, maybe I'll take a salad."
"Ok one taco salad." She teased while walking to the register.
"Welcome to Tacoizza. How may I help you?" Said a young woman that looked like she got out of bed.
"We'll take two salads."
"Ok. One….pizza salad and one taco." She said while falling asleep a couple times.
"Should we correct her?" Ron whispered.
"And get her angry? She looks like the kind of person to attack us with a knife while having her eyes closed." RNAnna whispered back while the woman typed in the wrong amount.
"The total will be $107.34. Do you want drinks with it?"
"Uh, sure." spoke Ron.
"Ok now your total is 300.45 chickens…" She said before falling asleep while standing up. "Zzz...cocks…."
"Ok….let's wake her up." Ron said while moving his hand towards her face. As he poked her a hand grabbed him and sent him flying into the kitchen. "AHHH!"
Crash!
"Ronny! Are you ok?!" RNAnna yelled in concern for his safety.
"Pretty birdies." he spoke feeling dizzy after hitting the wall. A couple items landed on him including, a bag of flour, a wooden mallet, and….a big piece of goat cheese. "Ow...I see the light…"
"DON'T GO INTO THE LIGHT!" She yelled in panic.
-meanwhile in a old monkey temple-
Monkey Fist grinned as he picked up an old tablet. This table 'stated' that if he could trap an enemy's soul into a candle, he would be unstoppable.
Yea...Right.
"Soon I will take Ron Stoppable's soul and become the most powerful Monkey Fu master on earth!" He laughed as a monkey ninja in a chicken suit appeared out of the shadows.
"Eep!" It said as it gave him a picture, a picture of Ron jumping into RNAnna's arms in fear. "Eep Eeep."
He looked at the picture with a frown. "So, he's there is he?"
"Eep Eep Ep!"
"Torrington community center….Monkies!" He yelled as a mass of monkey ninja's appeared and bowed to him. "Get ready the Monkey lautern, We are going Ron hunting!" He laughed as a strike of lightning illuminated the room.
-back with the couple-
"..onny. Ronny." A voice said as Ron woke up from his 'sleep'.
"DEMON MONKEYS!" he cried out sitting up.
"RONNY!" RNAnna cried as she squashed Ron against her breasts. "Are you ok?! Did that woman cause broken bones?!"
"No, I'm fine." he groaned from the hug.
"Thank goodness!" She said while hugging him tighter. "I thought I would lose my first boyfriend to a bitch!"
'Man, she really does care.'
"Ronny? Where's your friend?" She asked while rubbing Ron's head with her face. 'So soft.'
"Rufus?" Ron looked around and saw he wasn't in his pockets. "He's gone!"
(With Rufus)
"Ow…" He said as he looked down from a high shelf. Only to nearly faint from fear as he realized that he was hanging for dear life over an oven. "Ahhh!"
Rufus panicked before landing on a taco that was cooking on the grill. He was about to burn his tail when a hand picked him up and away from the grill.
(With the couple)
Both looked all around, but didn't spot the little fella.
"Eep." A ninja monkey said from behind them. "Eep."
"AH!" jumped Ron in fear.
As he screamed a thousand more monkeys surrounded the couple before a very familiar villain walked towards them with an iron lantern with a pissed off monkey face on it.
"Hello, Stoppable." he greeted with a sneer. "It's a...pleasure to see you again after you trapped me inside a stone statue from the last time we met."
"Oh, you still mad about that?" he chuckled nervously.
This remark caused the monkey handed human to shriek like a pissed off baboon. "Yes! And I think this." He snapped his fingers and a monkey ninja with a dark glare came up and showed Rufus, gagged and tied up in its hands. "Belongs to you."
"RUFUS!" cried Ron in horror.
"Now turn your soul over to the power of the monkey lantern or I will let my minions cut the rodent with a saw." He laughed as a monkey ninja with a saw came up with a dark laugh.
"Woah there, let's just be calm. I'll give you my soul, but how do I know Rufus is gonna be safe afterwards?"
"Well maybe I should cut up that bitch over there instead?" He grinned while pointing to RNAnna.
"I have a better idea. You put the mole rat down, and I don't have to break your jaw." she spoke in a serious tone with a glare.
"Oh I'm so scared." He mocked. "You and what army?"
"I don't need an army, just my legs." She glared before jumping over and kicked his wrist, sending Rufus up in the air before leg sweeping him and started kicking the ninja monkeys down.
"GAH! MONKEY NINJAS! ATTACK!" Monkey fist yelled as the remaining monkeys charged at them.
She got into a stance that Ron thought looked familiar before she started ducking and rolling away from their attacks while kicking them or throwing them at each other.
"EEP!"
"EEP!"
Just as Ron was looking at RNAnna's butt, a ninja monkey jumped on him and proceeded to attack him with its nails. "Ah! Bad monkey! Bad monkey!"
This didn't stop it since he then felt his head getting chopped on. "EEP!"
"Hiya!" cried Rufus attacking the monkey on the head with his hands after landing on it.
"Ep!" Yelled the chicken wearing monkey as it ran from the battle along with the rest of the monkey army.
"GET BACK HERE!" Yelled Monkey fist in frustration. "YOUR LEADER COMMANDS IT!"
"And he's gonna be sore in the morning." grinned RNAnna cracking her knuckles.
"YOU BITCH!" He yelled as he attempted to strike her...only for a pissed off Ron to grab his arm and break it. "GAH!"
"No one threatens my buddy OR my girlfriend!"
"You're nothing! I'm the most powerful monkey fu master on earth! And you are just a pathetic excuse of a man!" He yelled causing both Ron and RNAnna to glare before nodding to each other as they punched him across the face, which lead for him to go flying into a wall. "Ugh…."
"Run on home unless you want more of this! Hiya!" called Ron taking a kung fu pose.
"And my Kung fu!" RNAnna glared while sticking the middle finger at the 'master'.
Monkey Fist scowled before running off with the two smirking.
"Great job Ronny!" RNAnna smiled before hugging Ron against her chest.
"Ahem." coughed Rufus standing on Ron's shoulder.
"Oh and you too Rufus." She chuckled.
Rufus nodded with a smile while Ron blushed from his position, again.
"Good thing that I, RNAnna helped out!"
"Heh, yup. Uh, can you let go now?"
"Nope. I find this adorable." She giggled before continuing to hug the red faced boy. "Oh! And I forgot to give you a reward."
"What reward?" he got his answer as she held his face up and pressed their lips together.
"Yep. Tastier than any sweets~" she smiled. That's when she noticed the time and groaned. "Aw man, it's getting late. The convention's closing soon."
"Well. Since we're dating now." Ron blushed. "Could I get your number?"
"Well you don't have to worry, cause I have a feeling you and I are gonna be seeing each other more often." she smiled kissing his cheek. "See ya later, Ronny~"
Ron blushed as he watched his new girlfriend walking away with a cheerful hop and a skip. He then looked at Rufus who was giving him a thumbs up.
"Oh, and Ronny?" spoke RNAnna turning towards him.
"Yes?" Ron asked.
"Don't be too harsh on DNAmy, she's changed a lot. Afterall, she got a slimmer body, met a nice guy with a little mole rat, and looks adorable with a blush." she winked before walking away.
Both were just plain shocked with Rufus fainting and Ron just blushing up a storm.
"Wait….that's…..wow….."
-DNAmy's lab-
"Oh Ronny." RNAnna smiled as she looked at a vial labeled, 'Kim Possible DNA'.
"Meow?"
She turned to see one of her pets, which was a mix of a snake and cat with it having the head of said feline and the slithering body of the reptile.
"There you are Nagini!" She smiled while petting the snake-cat. "Oh it was a wonderful day! And soon you'll have a new papa to cuddle with."
Said pet purred with her tongue slithering out as her master brought up a picture of Rin before she eyed the naked mole rat on his shoulder.
"Oh? Interested in Rufus?" She chuckled.
The pet nodded in agreement. "Mew."
"Well as soon as we get more intimate, we can have some 'fun'." She smiled perversely.