There was a great deal of talk around the citadel, simple mutterings the servants would exchange in passing or to assuage the stress of a long day's work. They usually spoke of the latest royal scandal, eavesdropped conversations, and other scandalous topics. Lately, though, their subject of interest had been the young woman who had come to live with them. Though the staff adored Kagome and would never speak of her with ill intent, it became a general consensus that the human girl, who thus far had cheated death, would soon be greeting him.
Kagome was quarantined in the medical ward and none but the lord and the healer were permitted to see her since she had arrived. However, although the staff was never allowed entrance, they were responsible for cleaning the blood soaked bandages and bedding that emerged from the room. In the time since Kagome had reappeared at the front gates soaked in her own blood, it seemed her condition had not lessened and many were preparing themselves for the news of her demise; speaking in hushed tones. Some spoke of their desire for retribution against her clan while others wondered what had happened for her to return in such a state. However, all agreed that it would be better if Kagome was not human and that it was her humanity that condemned her; that it made her weak. Sesshomaru, with his acute hearing, heard it all.
The young heir sat in a shaded corner of the lawn by the lake picking blades of grass and shredding them into small pieces. He frowned as another piece of grass fell under his claws; upset at their fragility. It had been over a month since Kagome had returned and she had yet to awaken. What was worse was that his father still wouldn't let him visit her in the medical ward, stating that her condition was unstable and he would have to wait until she was more healed.
He didn't like being away from his pack mate and didn't understand why Kagome wasn't getting better. When he got a cut or was hurt in training he always healed within the hour; a day at most. She was strong too, stronger than him, stronger than his father's generals! So why wasn't she getting better? Plagued by these constant thoughts and the words of the servants he finally reached a conclusion: her humanity made her weak.
If Kagome wasn't human, she wouldn't be dying. If Kagome wasn't human, he could be playing with her right now. If Kagome wasn't human, she wouldn't be so weak.
For a being so young, Sesshomaru had a fairly firm grasp on the cycles of the world. The grass and vegetation would feed the herbivorous animals who would, in turn, be consumed by the omnivores and carnivores. The predators would eventually fall victim to time, and return to the earth, providing nutrients for the grass. However, demons stood apart from this cycle for they were the ultimate predator and did not feel the weight of time. Sesshomaru knew that the strong live and the weak die. It's just that he had thought that Kagome was like him, strong, but he was wrong. Kagome was just as weak as the rest of her race. Sesshomaru split another piece of grass; and she'll die just as easily as the rest.
With this realization, he felt a burning desire to protect his pack mate. She was his and he refused to let anyone take her from him, least of all death. Nodding vigorously at his decision, he decided that he would have to become strong for her. He would need to be the most powerful demon so that everyone knew she could not be touched. But first things first, he needed to get his father to let him visit her. Brushing the blades of grass from him and adjusting his garments to return to the state of perfection his mother commanded, he began to sniff out his father.
The Taisho had been working at his desk for the better part of the day, reviewing trade proposals and reports from his generals on the state of the Western Lands, when he heard the soft pattering of feet warning him of his son's imminent arrival. He had a general idea of what it was his son would be asking and began to set aside his work for later.
Sesshomaru did not even have the opportunity to announce himself before his father had given him permission to enter. He never did like his father's study. The walls were hidden behind shelves stacked high with scrolls and the only other table beside his father's desk was buried with maps, logbooks, and dividers for measuring distance. The floor was bare, a contrast to the tapestry covered walls depicting the leaders of past ages who seemed to watch Sesshomaru with judging eyes. His father's desk, one of his more western additions to the household, was orderly. Though to some, the study may seem like an area of efficiency and comfort, Sesshomaru felt the air was suffocating and his father's watchful gaze from above oppressive. Sesshomaru never felt more powerless than when he stood before his father in this room.
Yet, this time when he parted the screen and entered, he did it with confidence and refused to be effected by the atmosphere of the room. The Taisho immediately felt the change in his son's demeanor and wondered what had brought it about.
"Father, I wish to visit my pack mate."
Ah, the Taisho though, So he continues to draw strength from her even when she is not with him. Unfortunately, despite how much he wished he could bring the two together once again, he was bound by his agreement with Kagome's clan which prevented him from ever revealing any of their secrets and the magic circle carved into her back definitely constituted as a secret.
Initially, upon hearing from Kagome that her clan had expelled her, he had believed that he would no longer be bound by his oath. Yet, when he tried to explain the young girls situation to the healer or his mate, his voice refused to come out and his body was wracked with blinding pain; the punishment for all who attempt to speak things that should not be spoken of.
The Taisho still remembered the day he ascended to the throne of the Western Lands. He was proud to have defeated his father and had many visions of change he wished to implement. The celebration was carried out through the night and into the next morning and the Taisho himself felt that nothing would ever hold him back. He knew his power and the world feared him. He was overconfident.
The Taisho was only settling in after having rutted the females gifted to him by the other lords for his ascension when they appeared. The night was at its darkest and the figures seemed to emerge from the inky darkness as though they were nothing but shadows themselves. Their dark cloaks, mask covered faces, and veiled scents alerted him to the threat they posed, their only identifying feature being the brass triangular hourglass which hung from a chain around their cloaked necks.
When they left, they left him in a pool of his own blood after having extracted his oath of silence and obedience to their laws. For the longest time, the Taisho remained on the floor. Even after his wounds had healed and the sunlight lit the room in false warmth he remained on the puddled ground. Though his confidence and self-assurance were shattered by the ease with which he was defeated, it was his shame which kept him from rising and facing the world. He felt helpless and used; a mere game piece in the hands of the Watcher's clan. They could not be opposed.
Looking down upon his son, he saw the glow of developing strength and assurance not unlike how he was before that night all those years ago. His son truly cared for the girl, though it was currently entirely platonic in its nature he knew that when Sesshomaru grew into adulthood it would not take much effort on Kagome's part to win his son's heart. She was, after all, the first woman to stir his heart.
"At this time, Kagome cannot be disturbed; we do not want to risk her condition deteriorating any further."
"Well what exactly is her condition?" Came Sesshomaru's quick reply. The Taisho sighed at his son's persistence. This line of questioning was not infrequent as of late and he was running out of excuses to offer his son.
"Again, she was injured quite badly-"
"Which is why she need's my protection!" Sesshomaru cut off his father, "The bad guys might come back to finish her off and as her alpha, her protection is my responsibility."
"True as that may be, you are a member of my pack, and as your alpha the protection of your pack is ultimately my responsibility."
"Kagome is not yours, she's mine!" Sesshomaru growled truly shocking his father. This was the first time Sesshomaru did not simply accept his word as law and submit and though he wanted to be proud of his son's developing independence, he had no way of knowing what would happen should his son see the markings on her back. Since setting eyes upon the markings on her back, the healer had found himself under a similar contract as the Taisho; unable to speak of it and experiencing blinding pain when any attempts were made. He was just about to put Sesshomaru in his place when the screen to his office was slammed open unceremoniously, a frazzled looking maid panting in the doorway.
"My…Lord…" she struggled to say as she caught her breath. "It's Kagome, she's awake." Immediately, the Taisho moved to catch his son but was evaded. It seemed that Sesshomaru had increased his training recently if he was able to avoid his claws. He quickly gave chase after his son who had reverted to his true form in favor of speed and called over his shoulder for the maid to return to her duties.
Sesshomaru felt his heart race in excitement as he neared the infirmary, skidding around the corners as his claws failed to find purchase on the polished wood. When he finally made it there and was transforming back into his human form so that he could open the door when his father snatched him up.
"Let me go!" he yelled as he struggled to remove himself from his father's grip, "Kagome's in there and she wants to see me."
"She just woke up, pup. Your recklessness in your excitement may hurt her even more." The Taisho admonished.
"I don't care! I want to see Kagome!"
"Silence, I will not have you ruining a month's work of healing for your selfish desires."
"There is no need for concern, my Lord." Came Kagome's soft voice from the doorway, "As you can see, I am already alright."
"Kagome!" Sesshomaru cried as his father finally released him and she knelt to embrace him. "Are you sure that you're all better?"
"Why don't you find out." She smiled encouragingly. Immediately Sesshomaru began a thorough investigation of her person. He sniffed, poked, and licked her to varying degrees until he was satisfied that she was, in fact, better. The Taisho was equally mystified at how she had improved instantly upon her waking. Just that morning her back had begun to bleed anew and they feared the blood loss would truly take her. Yet, here she was before him, healthy as the day he had first met her. He raised his gaze to meet that of the healer's, a silent question voiced in it. The healer merely shook his head that he had no explanation for what had happened either.
"Father said that you were sick and the servants said there was a lot of blood." Sesshomaru directed his unspoken question to Kagome while sending accusing stares at his father for his believed lie. Kagome giggled at the young inu, lightening the air around her instantly.
"Your father wasn't wrong. I was injured quite badly. But sometimes when someone is very hurt, their body goes to sleep so that it can focus on healing quicker."
"So you were sleeping?" Sesshomaru asked with his nose scrunched in confusion.
"In a sense."
"Then why couldn't I visit you?"
"They didn't want you to wake me up!" Kagome said as if it were the most obvious thing in the world. "You know how grumpy I am when I wake up." Sesshomaru nodded enthusiastically.
The Taisho couldn't help but smile at how easily she handled his son. Though she must realize, there was no way she couldn't realize, dog demons had a very strong sense of smell and his son definitely had a more sensitive nose than others of their kind. Sesshomaru would have smelt her lie; he would have smelt her blood that remained thick in the air.
It was then that the Taisho realized that Sesshomaru had grown far more than he had realized. Sesshomaru had recognized that the mystery surrounding Kagome was one that he would not solve today or anytime in the near future and decided to allow it to remain as such for the sake of their relationship. The Taisho saw that his pup valued his pack mate too much to jeopardize anything and he was sure that Kagome knew this as well. The lord of the West couldn't help but wonder where the time had gone.
"Sesshomaru!" Kagome called as she wandered the halls of the citadel. "Sesshomaru, where are you?" This was the third time that week that Sesshomaru had decided to play hooky and not attend his lessons. Of course the elderly demon teacher was not agile enough to keep up with the adolescent and would repeatedly turn to Kagome to track the truant down.
Having checked all his usual hiding places, Kagome was at a loss of where he could be. She had checked the kitchens, the library, the stables, and even the training hall only to come up empty handed. It was only as she passed the residential wing of the citadel that she came to a screeching halt and had to resist hitting her head repeatedly against a wall in her stupidity. Though Sesshomaru was undoubtedly a dog, he strangely had quite a few cat like tendencies, namely afternoon catnaps.
She opened the door to his room loudly, looking to upset the sleeping dog only to discover that he wasn't present in that room either. Truly befuddled as to where he could be other than his room, Kagome cocked her head in confusion when she heard a rustling from her room next door. When she opened the screen which joined their two rooms she found her quarry.
Lying on her futon, limbs stretched to bath in the greatest amount of sunlight possible was her alpha. He had a slight frown marring his face and his hair was fanned out around him with his nose buried underneath her pillows sniffing lightly. Kagome couldn't help but smile at how much he had grown in the last few hundred years. Gone was the small boy whose head reached only her hip and who saw the world as a mystery waiting to be solved. In his place was a young man growing into adulthood. Sesshomaru's arms and legs were long and gangly, not having yet filled out and his face still retained many of his more boyish qualities. All in all, Kagome mussed, he looks like an average human teenager. Kagome sneaked up to kneel beside the boy and decided that he deserved a little punishment for forcing her to look for him all afternoon. Reaching forward, she carefully pinched his nose cutting off his ability to breathe and waited. And waited. And waited. Curse these demons and their ability to hold their breath for extended periods of time! Giving up, she shook his shoulder gently until she saw one of his eyelids rise to languidly watch her.
Seeing the raised eyebrow and pinched lips on the girls face, Sesshomaru decidedly closed his eye and rolled so that his back was to her; a small smirk forming when he heard her huff of incredulity. The only warning of her attack he received was a yell of, "Sesshomaru!" before he had a knee digging into his back and small fists beating against his bony shoulder. She was the cutest when frustrated. Kagome even began to growl when he did not respond to her attack. Before she could even realize what had happened, the tables turned. Sesshomaru had captured her and was holding her immobile in his arms.
"Can't we sleep just a little longer?" he whispered lethargically as he nuzzled the back of her neck trying to take in more of her scent. Sesshomaru enjoyed his time spent alone with Kagome and had begun to skip more of his lessons when he realized that the old bats teaching him would simply send her to fetch him back. In the last seventy years or so, his father had begun to demand that he spend more time with him so that he could learn early on how to run the Western Lands. In the time spent with his father, he had begun to learn more of the darker sides of the world. He had seen many atrocities when on patrol with his father; rape, murder, slavery, and abuse. He couldn't understand what drove people to treat others of their own kind in such a crude manner and was deeply affected by what he saw. However, nothing changed him more than the time when he first killed someone.
He had been approached by a small girl; she was wearing worn clothing and was so thin that the sharpness of her bones was clearly visible. Her body was covered in dirt and the smell of waste and sweat clung to her like a second skin. He was alone when she came to him; his father had gone into the village to speak with the headman. She never spoke or gestured that she wanted something from him despite his obvious wealth and instead, offered a fish she had caught to him. It was quite clear that she required the nourishment the fish could provide and so he turned it down. She wouldn't take no for an answer though and left after placing the fish on some leaves. He felt himself warm at her crooked gap tooth smile which seemed to light up her eyes. He ate the fish gratefully.
When sundown came and his father had not yet returned, he decided to venture into the village to find him. The village was clearly impoverished, yet the headman's home seemed to lack nothing from what Sesshomaru could tell from outside. As he made his way down the street he heard yelling and jeering. Curious, he followed the sound to a small crowed circled around a small mound. Upon closer inspection, he discovered that the small mound was in fact the girl from earlier that day curled in on herself as the other around her kicked and beat her. They threw rocks and hit her with sticks yet she did not cry out or move to defend herself. Sesshomaru quickly discerned from the yelling that she was being beaten for not making herself available to sate the sexual desires of the Western lord. Sesshomaru knew that his father would not have called for such favors, but it was possible that the Taisho's known leniency in policy towards humans had led them to believe he desired such services.
Horrified, Sesshomaru had rushed to the girl's defense and was immediately told off by whom he learned were her parents. They berated the girl for supposedly whoring herself out to him and the mob began to grow greater in size. Sesshomaru defended her as well as he could, but he did not wish to cripple them and the amount of people attacking her was making protecting her difficult.
When he heard the sick crack of a scull giving way Sesshomaru turned, horrified to find the small girls head to have been bashed in by a large piece of farming equipment. He didn't even think as his claws ripped through the throat of the man who had landed the blow, all he could see were the hopeful wide brown eyes that gazed up at her savior and the blood that was dripping down her dirt stained face into those eyes. Sesshomaru was beside himself and continued to rip into the body of the man who killed her. It was not until his father had physically removed him that he came back to himself. His horror filled eyes looked down to his hands that were covered in blood and his mouth tasted metallic from the blood that had splattered across his face and in his mouth. To him, he was not covered in the blood of the man but the blood of the young girl who had smiled so innocently and offered up her only food to a passing stranger in kindness. It was his fault she had died. If he had only protected her better.
His mind flashed back to when he was younger and had discovered Kagome's blood-soaked body lying in front of the gates to his home. He had nearly lost Kagome then and had absolved himself to become the strongest demon in the world so that he would never lose something so precious. The events of today proved to him that he was still weak. That if someone were to attack Kagome, he would be unable to protect her.
He allowed his father to guide him to a nearby river and begin to cleanse him of the blood covering him. Sesshomaru stood still, dead to the world as he drowned in his own self-deprecating thoughts. His father spoke calmly and in low, soothing tones but Sesshomaru heard nothing. It was only when he had returned to the citadel and was wrapped in Kagome's arms in the solitude of his rooms that he allowed himself to mourn. To mourn not just the small girl, Rin he had later learned was her name, but a piece of his innocence that he could never have returned. By the end of the night, he had hardened his heart having decided that he would have to be strong to protect Kagome. That if Kagome was in Rin's position, he would not hold back to protect the humans, but would destroy them all if it meant that Kagome would be safe.
The memory of that day was enough for Sesshomaru to tighten his hold on Kagome who lay patiently in his arms. She knew that he needed time where no one would look at him and he could express his emotions freely. She missed the young puppy that would follow her around and drag her off on his inane quests around the grounds. Sesshomaru was actually quite aware of things and sensitive to changes and he dealt with it by slowly cutting himself off from the world. His smiles and laughs were becoming more and more rare, replaced by stony expressions and silence. Reaching up, Kagome gripped the arm around her chest tightly as if she could keep him there with her forever.
Of course, Sesshomaru was aware of her desire to return to how things once were. How could he miss her sad glances whenever he declined her invitation to a picnic by the lake or a walk of the grounds? But he had to grow stronger; for the West, for himself, and for her, his pack mate.
His father had once told him that he worried too much and that Kagome was perfectly capable of protecting herself. Though, Sesshomaru thought, if that was the case, what happened those three days she was gone and in the month that followed after? Although he had accepted her lie at the time, he greatly desired for her to tell him the truth. She had reintegrated herself in their lives seamlessly after that incident, but her unusual habit of disappearing every now and then had not changed. Each of these times Sesshomaru would grit his teeth and engross himself in his training until she returned, constantly concerned for her safety.
Suddenly, Kagome stiffened in his arms and Sesshomaru immediately began to search out the source of her discomfort. Almost instantly he smelt it, the only real change since that night one hundred years ago. Her blood. He had often smelt her blood at random times when she should not have been wounded only to have his questions refused or brushed off as being part of her womanly bleeding. He smelt her lies, he always smelt her lies and he would be damned if he let it go on any longer.
He tightened his grip on her and growled for her to remain still. He slowly pushed himself to hover above her, his sharp amber eyes fixated on her own blue ones. She was entranced and barely noticed when his hands began to work their way under her cloths. It was only as his claws brushed against her skin, causing her body to erupt in goose bumps that she realized his invasion. Yet, just as quickly as she had realized, he held her hands restrained above her head in one of his own. The other hand, in the meantime, worked her clothes away from her body so that he could see her stomach. His sight betrayed him though. He could smell the blood, he could feel the blood, yet there was no wound or blood to be seen on her stomach.
"Kagome." He growled lowly, threateningly. She squirmed for a moment under him before looking away. "You will release whatever spell is preventing this Sesshomaru from assessing your wound." She pouted and the spell remained. "Kagome."
"Fine." She whispered, "But promise that you won't make a big deal out of it or anything."
"This Sesshomaru will not repeat himself again, Kagome. Remove the spell." Finally, her eyes met him and her lips parted no doubt to protest further, before the look he shot her successfully shut her up. Almost as if a glamor covering her body was lifted, Sesshomaru watched as the visible skin on her face, neck, arms, and stomach shimmered before dispelling completely, leaving behind her true body. Sesshomaru couldn't breathe.
Every inch of her skin he could see was covered in bruises, scars, or healing cuts. The source of blood was found to be a shallow slice along her lower abdomen, the blood having already begun to clot.
"How…" he began, "I don't understand." His confused and shocked eyes met her resigned and sad blue ones. "How is it that you received this injury when I was beside you? There were no others in the room and you possess no object that would have caused this wound."
"I can't say, Sesshomaru. This is just how it is." Her words were heavy with grief and Sesshomaru couldn't help but be frustrated at his lack of information and inability to protect her. Has she been enduring this the last few hundred years while he remained ignorant?
"Is this another aspect of your duty?" His voice was venomous and his distaste for her duty evident.
"I suppose it is." She said as a tear rolled down her cheek, "It wasn't originally, but now…" She suddenly clenched her teeth and curled in on herself as waves of pain wracked her mind. It seems she said too much.
"Say no more." Sesshomaru commanded. He recognized the pain on her face and how she was clutching her head. It was the same expression his father wore whenever he tried to talk about Kagome's background or her duty to her clan. All he had learned was that her clan was strong, had power over Kagome, and that they had hurt her. His father had repeatedly told him that one day he would understand. That one day he would know all her secrets.
Sesshomaru decided that when that day came, he would kill every last member of Kagome's clan.