WARNING: Implied femslash. Only implied, but I know some don't like it so much...
William Turner has never felt more guilty in his life. Even considering all the not-so-respectable things he's done since choosing to call himself a pirate, nothing has made him feel even half as horrible as he does now.
Emily is gone. And he is sure it is entirely fault.
Jade was trying to convince him otherwise, and Jack has tried to do the same several times since he's come on board the Black Pearl. It all happened so fast. They'd come in the middle of the night. No one could've known the sleepy little port they lived in was about to be attacked, much less attacked by Company ships. That's why he'd been keeping them on land, because he'd thought they'd be safe there.
But none of those excuses accounted for the fact that his almost eight year old daughter had run off because she'd been angry with him-again. Not to mention the fact that she was angry with him because he and Jade…
No. He wouldn't think like that. Emily didn't understand, that was all. She was too young. And it wasn't as though anyone had to know, wasn't as though Elizabeth had to know.
That's where they are headed now, to find Elizabeth. The thinking is that they find a ship that's not well armed and do what pirates do best, and the Dutchman will have to come to pick up the dead.
He has to admit that the idea of seeing some action is appealing, even under the circumstances. He hasn't had to use his sword in what feels like too long. And he does want to see his Elizabeth, to spite what Emily seemed to think…
He remembers how Elizabeth had grown strangely cold, how she had seemed so ready to be angry at someone for something, even the smallest things over their last visits. She had even pulled out her pistol and shot a new member of Jack's crew when last he'd seen her. Not that he hadn't seen her like that before; it was more that the man had hardly done a thing to deserve it. Something seemed to have her vexed. He hopes it has nothing to do with him, but fears that it does.
Either way, he hopes someone will be willing to have mercy on the men who took Emily. With this new, cold and short tempered and rather frightening Captain Turner controlling the Flying Dutchman, he has a feeling they won't see any kind of peace for a long time to come.
Elizabeth wakes with a start, sitting bolt upright in her bed. She has broken out in a cold sweat, soaking her clothes and the bed itself, and she knows her heart would be pounding were it still in her chest. She's had the same dream every night for the past two weeks, and everytime she wishes more that it was really just a dream.
But she knows better. After all, it's always the same. She lies with Will as his wife and he is gentle and sweet, though passionate, the way he was when they first were together. Then things change and he is sloppier and a little rougher and his breath reeks of rum, and suddenly she is no longer in bed with him, but watching him as he lays with Jade. The realness of the dream has her goddesses touch, she is sure of it. Her husband has finally done it.
She is damned forever.
The sadness is overwhelming. Elizabeth does not know what to do. She finds herself wishing desperately for her goddesses comfort, but Calypso's presence is absent for reasons unknown.
A tear slides down her cheek, and then comes the anger, washing over her in burning waves. She is furious, first with Will for being unfaithful, then with her goddess for apparently abandoning her.
In the end she is mad at only herself, though, for being so week as to cry over it all. Why should she have expected any different, from Will or her goddess?
Elizabeth stalks out of her cabin and up on deck, hoping that the cool night air will calm her down some. Not many others are around when she appears, the pail moonlight illuminating her slender figure. She walks slowly across the deck, sliding her hand aross the rail, pausing when she gets close to the crews quarters, turning to lean forward on the rail and stare down at the calm waters below her.
She isn't quite sure whether she's hearing things when the whispers first reach her ears.
Elizabeth turns towards the crew's quarters. The short hallway leading to them is dark, just as she would expect. But there is another small room off that hallway, and this one has a door, and that door is cracked open. The flickering light of a candle spills out into the hallway from within it.
She can hear the hushed voices much more clearly now. One of them can only belong to a woman. Marie.
But who on earth is the girl with? Elizabeth had given her separate quarters, a room just next to her captain's cabin. She trusts her men, but still, they are men, and Marie is a very pretty young girl.
Elizabeth moves in closer, her curiousity getting the best of her, and listens to what Marie is saying.
"I'm worried about what the Captain will say. She has not been herself as of late… I know you've noticed it too, Jaimee, we all have."
"Aye, I have, but what are ye so worried about? What's there to object to?" A male voice, Jaimee, replyed.
"I can think of many things."
"Just tell 'er." His voice softens. "Tell 'er that we're in love."
Silence reigns for a long moment. Elizabeth stares forward and tries to push away the foreign, unnamed feeling that washes over her, a feeling so very different from the anger she is used to feeling, and yet not so different at all.
"Jaimee." Marie hisses, but she does not really sound upset. "We can't! What if…what if I were to…"
"Find yerself with a little one? Is that possible for..you know.. us?"
"Captain Turner did, didn't she? I've heard talk…"
"That were before I came aboard too, but it wouldn't be a surprise. Maybe 'erself will be more understandin than ye think."
"Tomorrow. We'll go to the Captain together."
There is another pause, and Elizabeth barely hears it when Jaimee speaks again, but there can be no mistaking the words that come out of his mouth.
"I love you."
The conversation reminds her of a similar one she and Will once had.
The strange feeling is like fire in Elizabeth's veins, and she suddenly wants nothing more than to make them both pay for daring to grasp onto what she can no longer have.
"Lizzie…"
Elizabeth freezes, startled, her hand halfway to opening the door.
"Come now, my Lizzie. Cruelty don' become ye."
Her goddess's presence rushes back full force, Calypso's voice echoing off the walls around her.
"Come to me now an' I will show you why ye have no reason ta be jealous."
Elizabeth closes her eyes for a moment, takes a breath, then lets her hand fall back to her side as she spins around and silently heads back to her cabin.
She falls into sleep quickly, lulled to it by her goddesses sweet voice. Before she knows it she is on that beautiful beach again. She feels nothing here but a strange mixture of joy and sadness; joy for being with her goddess again, and sadness for losing Will.
Crying while on the Dutchman was never an option. There were already plenty of men who hated to serve under a woman, much less an emotional one.
Here, there are no such restraints.
Elizabeth collapses into the sand without hesitation, allowing the tears to fall freely as she hugs her knees to her chest. Her goddess allows her time to greive; she is not sure how long it has been since she arrived here. Time does not seem to work the same way when she is in her goddess's paradise.
Finally, afer what seems a life time, no more tears come. The sun is hot above her; she finds herself wishing it was nighttime and she had the beautiful moon to look up at.
Just like that, clouds roll into the sky, dispersing moments later to reveal a beautiful starry night. Elizabeth's eyes widen as she stares up in wonder. When she looks back down there is a small fire burning just a short ways away, popping and crackling. She'd only just barely begun to think how wonderful a fire would be before it appeared.
"My Lizzie."
Elizabeth turns and springs to her feet at the sight of her goddess standing before her. She doesn't even think to give Calypso the bow she usually does as she stares in shock at her goddess, who is dressed not in the old dress that Elizabeth is accustomed to always seeing her in, but in a dress of fine silk, beautifully embroidered.
It looks like something Elizabeth might've worn as the governor's daughter, though she can't help but to think that her goddess looks so much more beautiful in it.
Why any of this catches her attention the way that it does, she has not a clue.
Her goddess comes forward, smiling kindly, and brushes a strand of hair back behind Elizabeth's ear.
"M-my goddess." She stutters. Calypso leans in closer, and Elizabeth is struck, not for the first time, with urge to kiss her goddess's full lips.
She tries to hold it back. It is wrong, it must be…
"Come, my Lizzie. I am here for you. You may call me by my name."
I am here for you. The words echo in Elizabeth's ears until all that matters is the beautiful woman standing before her. She leans in, finally giving in to her desires, and is not shy in the least about kissing her goddess.
"Calypso." She breathes the name against her goddess's lips. Calypso smiles at her and then sits in the sand, laying back slowly and looking up at Elizabeth expectantly. Elizabeth is surprised, but accepts her goddess clear offer without hesitation.
That night, as she lies in her new lovers arms, William Turner is the farthest person from her mind. And when she wakes the next morning, she feels no regrets.
No regrets whatsoever.