Crazy trouble with love
Female Nico and Percy
Series: Percy Jackson
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-New Jersey, outside random mall-
Nico De Angelo wandered through the mall with his hands in his pockets with an expression that showed loneliness and sadness. He just started to return to his happy child persona, but it was hard when your sister is dead, the only way to bring the dead back is forbidden to everyone including his father, and….for some odd reason, he couldn't get Percy Jackson out of his mind!
'Damn it! I should be pissed at him! If me and Bianca never found out about all this, we might have been fine!' he thought while clenching his fists. He then decided to sing a song that Bianca heard on tv once….and it was The South Park Bitch Song. But he decided to spite a random God or goddess from his days playing mythomagic, and the one that came to mind was one of the weakest card in the game, Aphrodite.
"WEEEELL Aphrodite's a bitch she's a big fat bitch, she's the biggest bitch in the whole wide world she's a stupid bitch if there ever was a bitch, she's a bitch to all the boys and girls!" started Nico with a grin as he didn't care who heard him. "On Monday she's a bitch, on Tuesday she's a bitch, and Wednesday to Saturday she's a bitch, then on Sunday just to be different she's a super King Zeus beotch!"
As he sung this revised song, a woman with red hair and in a pink t-shirt and khakis started to eye twitch in anger. 'Keep this up son of Hades, I dare you!'
"Have you ever met Aphrodite she's the biggest bitch in the whole wide world she's a mean old bitch and she has stupid hair she's a bitch bitch bitch bitch bitch bitch bitch bitch she's a stupid bitch! Aphrodite's a bitch and she's just a dirty bitch!" he continued with some of the mall shoppers even finding the singing amusing with some covering their children's ears.
'Hades!' The woman cussed in her mind as she started digging her nails into her skin. 'If you have been teaching your children this, I will swear to kick you in the balls!' she put the shirt she was looking at back on the rack and walked over with a huff and tapped Nico's shoulder.
"Yes?" He asked while not turning his head around. "I'm trying to sing here."
"Can you quit that annoying singing?"
"Why should I?" He said getting annoyed. "It's not offending anyone."
"Well it's offending me." She said in a cold tone as a thick mist covered the area obscuring everyone's view, except for the woman's and Nico's. Her clothes shifted into a white toga with her hair turning brown. "The woman who's a so called 'bitch'."
Nico sweated but kept a straight face. "So? Aren't you one in the myths?"
Really bad move because now Aphrodite looked like she was about to explode in rage.
'Maybe it was a bad idea after all.' he thought feeling nervous.
"You….YOU!" She yelled in rage. "DISRESPECTFUL CHILD OF HADES! I WILL MAKE SURE THAT YOU WILL PAY FOR THIS BLASPHEMY!"
He gulped before remembering why he was mad and tried glaring back. "Well, I have a right to be mad! You're the goddess of love, but what good is it if I lose everyone I love? Tell me that!"
Aphrodite growled. "YOU COULD HAVE ACCEPTED IT YOU BRAT! AND EVEN THE DEAD KNOW THAT LOVE IS STILL IN THEM! Even in your sister, Bianca." She then got a brilliant idea. "Wait, you said you lost everyone you love, right?"
"Yeah." He yelled while looking a little nervous at the goddess' expression. 'Why am I thinking that I should have zipped my mouth?'
"Well I know for a fact you're wrong, you still have your cousin." she smirked.
Nico blushed. "W-What are you talking about bitch." He then covered his mouth. 'Crap!'
Aphrodite frowned before creating a pink ball of dust and blew it onto Nico. "Well since you think that love is nothing but pain, I will give you another perception of life, and who knows, you might just thank me~" she then vanished in a pink cloud of dust.
Nico coughed and tried waving the dust away while accidentally inhaling some of it. He then shrugged before shadow traveling back to camp Half Blood where lo and behold, Percy Jackson was finishing a calming swim in the lake, shirtless.
"Oh," Percy said before calling out to him. "Hey Nico, want to join me at the Poseidon table tonight?"
"Uh, sure." spoke Nico while patting his chest. 'Weird dust.'
"So," Percy said. "Are you feeling better now?"
"A little bit."
Percy smiled before rubbing his head, and causing Nico's hair to get messy. "That's great, you're improving."
Nico felt his face heat up and stepped back. "Uh, so…..I'll go out and wait till later."
"Sure?" He asked confused. "Just don't oversleep, I don't want to wake you up again by tickling your feet with a harpy's feather."
Nico nodded before running behind a rock and made it seem like he left while panting and felt his heartbeat increase. 'Why is my heart beating like this….did I eat something?'
Nico looked around to see if Percy was gone, thankfully he was, and ran straight to his cabin. He closed the door and sighed before taking his clothes off. When he was done, he walked to the bed and plopped right onto it with a smile.
'I know I pissed Aphrodite off, and got a look at Percy's chest, but I feel really good.' He thought as he fell asleep.
-next day-
"Nico?" Percy called out while knocking at the cabin door. "Nico did you oversleep again?"
Nothing but the sounds of snores were heard inside the cabin.
"...ok then." Percy said while opening the door before taking a large white feather from out of his pocket. "Harpy feather time."
He slowly walked over to the bed, but as he got closer, he noticed something was off.
And these 'off' things were: a. There was a huge lump in the center of the bed. b. Said lump looked like a girls body. And c. The lump was saying his name.
"...Per….cey…." Spoke the lump in the bed.
'That doesn't sound like Nico.'
"Percy….chest…" It said while moving slightly and revealing an exposed breast which looked like an eye from Percy's perspective. "Mmm."
"Gah!" he jumped back and landed on his ass while the lump sat up.
"Mmmm….Percy?" The lump said as a mess of long black hair came out of the sheets like a mess of pasta. "Where's the pancakes?"
Percy blinked and blushed seeing the figure was a girl with no clothes on. She looked like Bianca but with two D cups, something strange of a kid her age, and a set of….pink eyes mixed with onyx black?
She rubbed her eye and looked at seeing Percy was blushing with his jaw hanging open. "Percy? What happened? Did a Fury attack you or something?"
"Uh, who are you….and why are you in my bed naked?"
She looked confused. "I always sleep naked. And it's me Nico."
"Nico?" he blinked. He looked closer and shook his head. "Sorry, but you look more like Bianca than Nico."
She growled. "STOP MENTIONING MY SISTER!" She then summoned a shadow to emphasise the point. "Got it Percy."
Percy gulped at seeing the shadow and gasped. "Holy crap, it is you Nico!"
"Of course it's me. How else would I have been? Athena in a bunny suit?" She said annoyed only for an owl to land on her and poop on her before flying away. "...laugh and I will send you to my father faster then you can say 'crap'."
"Uh, that's kind of on you." he tried joking.
She growled. "Percy. If-" she looked down and saw her breasts before screaming. "AAAAHHHHHHHHH!"
Percy covered his ears while watching Nico freak out and start running around the cabin.
"HOW DID THIS HAPPEN?!" She yelled as ghosts and shadows started to appear in both inside and outside the cabin, causing various campers to scream in fear as Nico started to curl up into a ball on the cabin floor next to Percy. "I'M A FUCKING GIRL!"
"Yeah, I got that." he spoke while covering his ears from the screaming.
Nico looked at Percy. "...it's all Aphrodite's fault! She did this to me!"
"Wait, can she do that?"
"She cursed me." She said while calming down. "For no reason." Nico hiccupped after saying that.
"Uh, you sure there wasn't a reason." Percy raised an eyebrow.
"No." Nico said before hiccuping again. "Nothing at all, hic."
"You gonna keep that up all day?"
Nico blushed. "Um...what up hic?" 'Damn this hiccup!'
"Just say what happened!" he groaned getting tired of his cousin not talking.
"...I sung the…." She blushed. "South Park bitch song and….added her name into it in front of a mall….."
Percy blinked and stared at Nico. "Wow….I got nothing to say to that."
Nico rolled over to Percy and looked at him with a red face. "How was I supposed to know she was there?! I was trying to vent my frustrations!"
"Well, maybe next time you could try screaming into a pillow?"
"Or push you into a vat of killer emus." Nico half joked while uncurling herself and making Percy blush from seeing her naked form...again. "I heard that you hate emus...is that right?" She said before hugging him tight. "Or are you just nervous at seeing me as a mirror image….of Bianca….?"
"Uh….I'm more nervous because you still don't have any clothes on."
Nico looked down a blushed before covering herself up with some shadows. "Damn it Percy! You should have mentioned that before I realized I was a girl you….ghoul for brains!"
"Well you're the one who sleeps in the nude! Even as a guy that's a little weird."
"I get hot at night!" She yelled. "Not everyone has an instant cooling system from your own parents! Besides," she frowned. "Dad never gave me anything like that when I found out about my powers…." 'Or anything like that….'
Percy sighed as they sat there in total silence.
Nico looked at Percy finally and said. "Can you….um….help explain this to everyone? I don't want people hitting on me when I get out the door."
"Don't worry, once they hear you're you, I don't think you'll have to worry about that."
"...are you sure?" She blushed. "Because the twins might blackmail me for pranks if they knew this." 'Hopefully not.'
"Trust me on this, I'll lend you some clothes."
"Thanks….Percy." She blushed.
-two minutes later, banquet halls-
'Not.' Nico thought as now everyone was staring at her like some sort of alien or something. "P-Percy?"
"Yeah?"
"C-Can you...help?" She said pointing to the campers that were currently looking at her. 'HELP ME!'
"Alright people, that's all. Let's just go back to what we were doing." spoke Percy.
The crowd dispersed, leaving Annabeth and a certain Ares child. Both were looking at Nico with confusion and interest.
"So?" Spoke Clarisse with a grin. "The little boy is now a little girl, ha! This is a riot!"
"Don't start." growled Nico.
"Why shouldn't I?" She grinned while not noticing a shadow behind her before it was too late and gave her the worst wedgy of her life. "AAHH!"
"That's why." smirked Nico.
"N-Noted." She said with a blush as the shadow placed over her head….and it was a pink panty with an owl on it.
"...so you like Annabeth?" Nico grinned. "Never thought of you as a fan of blonds...or books...or even thin-"
"SHUT UP!" Clarisse yelled while grabbing her by the neck. "Don't say another word."
"...Owl lover?" Nico said before being thrown out of the hall and landing in the Aphrodite cabin. "Ow...that smarts…"
"You gonna be alright?" asked Percy running over to the cabin.
"Yes." 'No.' Nico said only for a statue of the goddess of love to come to life and….well she was pissed.
"First you insult me," it growled. "Now you destroy the roof of my cabin. You are so lucky I can't just turn you into a purse or something."
"Oh yeah, I sooo asked to come breaking your precious roof." huffed Nico.
"..." Aphrodite looked ready to kill Nico. "Soon, I will collect but for now," she kicked Nico's leg, hard. "I will add to this curse, for as long as I'm a goddess, your breasts will grow by two sizes every month and no clothes ever made will fit you ever again!"
"Oh come on!" groaned Nico.
"And for that," Aphrodite said with a sadistic grin. "I will add this, everything you eat will go straight to your hips."
Nico growled as the statue went back to normal before she got up and stamped out of the cabin.
"Nico!" Percy called out before catching up. "Don't let her piss you off. Just calm down and think happy thoughts….oh wait….can goths even get happy tho-"
"SHUT UP!"
Percy reeled back before frowning. "Nico. Calm down right now."
"NO! THIS IS ALL YOUR FAULT!" she growled while more shadows started spreading out around them.
"How is it my fault?" He said now with an expression similar to his father. "I never did anything to harm you or your sister, heck I wanted to die just so Bianca could see you!" He then marched straight up to Nico. "And if I hear you say that 'I caused Bianca's death' one more time I will do the one thing that not even your father would dare to do."
"What's that?" she growled with the ground shaking due to her anger.
Percy grabbed Nico by the neck and glared at her with pissed off eyes of sea green. "I will spank you, miss emo brat."
"Y-You wouldn't dare!" She yelled.
"Try me Nico De Angelo." Percy said with a cold tone.
Nico gulped as the shadows got shorter and she nodded. "Fine."
Percy calmed down. "Good. Now calm down and tell me why you're so pissed at me. Without the whole 'Bianca is dead because of me' speech."
"Because, if Bianca….hadn't passed on, I wouldn't have been so pissed and ended up insulting Aphrodite, meaning I wouldn't be a girl."
"...that's the most stupidest thing I have ever heard." Percy said. "Even if that was true, you would have insulted her eventually. Especially since…." Percy blushed. "Bianca told me you like that song before that quest so if you say that her passing would have turned you into a girl, you are crazier than Luke on nectar."
"I'm sad alright!" she turned. "Sad, angry, confused, everything!"
Percy chuckled. "You sound like me when I thought my mom was taken by Hades my first summer here." He then hugged Nico. "But you have to let that stuff go or you might turn into an emo chick." He joked.
She sniffled and wanted to slap him, but just calmly hugged him back.
Percy sighed. "Let it out, just let it out Nicole."
"I'm still Nico." she muttered lightly slapping his back.
"I know." He said while rubbing her head. "I know."
-two months later-
Ever since then, Nico had stuck with staying in Percy's cabin since she refused to be anywhere near the others who might either ask her out, tease her, or ask annoying questions on what she did to get on Aphrodite's bad side. Speaking of bad sides, Aphrodite's curses came true since Nico had a huge ass the size of a small table, a set of H cups and well...nothing she wore could fit her anymore, causing her to become a nudist. But that mattered little since now both were happy with each other's company, especially Nico.
"Percy?" Nico asked while looking at her ass. "Do you think Aphrodite was fair giving me this 'everything I eat goes to my hips' curse?"
"I don't think what I say is gonna change her mind."
Nico sighed. "Well," she then walked to the bed and sat down. "It's better then getting turned into a human purse." 'That wouldn't be good...not one bit!'
"I'm gonna see if I can talk to some of the kids from the Aphrodite cabin and see if some of them can sew up some new clothes for you."
"Just not Drew!" She said with a shudder. "She's," Nico cleared his throat. "WEEEELL Drew's a bitch she's a big fat bitch, she's the biggest bitch in the whole wide world she's a stupid bitch if there ever was a bitch, she's a bitch to all the boys and girls!-"
"I get it, and be careful, don't want Aphrodite to hear you." he joked before heading out.
Nico snickered before looking around for anyone else before opening the draws and grabbing….Percy's casual t-shirt. "Hope no one sees me do this." She then started to rub herself, with the shirt in her right hand, right near her snatch. Now you're thinking...what the heck? But you see, Nico learned that the feeling she felt before was actually the feeling of a crush, which blossomed over time to love. And as of now, she's masturbating to relieve her stress and sexual desires that she accumulated over the last few months.
'Ah, it's so good.' she thought feeling her body warm up while lightly touching her folds.
As she started to rub faster, she didn't notice that the cabin door was knocking.
"Nico?" Percy called out. "Are you there?" He waited a few minutes before getting impatient and opening the door….just as Nico was cuming into his shirt. "Nic-"
"I'M CUMMING!" Nico called out before panting on the bed.
"NICO!?"
"P-PERCY!?" Nico blushed while frantically trying to hide the evidence. "W-Why are you back so s-soon?" 'Crap crap crap CRAP!'
"I wanted to….let you know the….kids were busy….." he spoke while looking away with a bright blush.
Nico blushed. "P-Percy….it's not what it looks like."
"Then what is it?"
"...Aphrodite possessed me, hic." She said with a blush redder than a Fury's whip.
"You really gotta work on that." he deadpanned.
"Um…...Bianca possessed me, hic." 'DAMN IT!'
"Nico, just tell me, or this is gonna feel more awkward than it already is."
Nico blushed. "IloveyouPercy!" She got out in one breath before causing a shadow to envelop her in embarrassment.
"Wait….what?!"
The shadows moved back slightly revealing her face. "I….I love you Percy….."
"Again, what?" he spoke shaking his head.
This time Nico was embarrassed and pissed off as the shadows disappeared from her body and enveloped Percy's limbs before tugging him closer to her. "I LOVE YOU PERCY JACKSON!"
He blushed feeling their chests touch. "I...I…..I don't know what to say."
Nico looked at him. "But I do, I love you even when I was male, but until recently I….I took my frustrations on you and everyone else. Heck….I think that was why Aphrodite cursed me," she blushed heavier. "To get me to admit this to you."
'Figures she'd play matchmaker with me and my own cousin!'
"Percy…." Nico blushed. "I-I'm sorry about masturbating on your shirt."
"It's fine." he spoke without looking at her chest.
Nico saw this and grinned. "Percy? Were you just thinking of me in a swimsuit?" 'Not that I mind...if I could fit into them!'
"W-What? What makes you say that?"
"You talk in your sleep." She deadpanned. "And wow….not even Aphrodite would be saying such stuff about someone's chest, especially mine."
"Well it doesn't help when you're a nudist." he muttered to himself.
Nico moved over and hugged her cousin. "Percy, if you want….we could be a c-c-couple?" She blushed at the notion. 'It's not like he would date me, his own cousin...sigh.'
"W-Well...I'm not really sure." he admitted while hugging her back. Only for an silver owl to appear and land of Nico's head.
"Calm down you two...especially you spawn of Poseidon." The owl spoke in a very familiar voice.
"Athena?" spoke Nico in surprise with slight annoyance at her calling Percy that. "What are you doing here?"
"To tell you this." The owl said before turning into a miniature version of the goddess. "That you should be careful about having a relationship with your cousin."
"Well isn't it shrugged off with gods and goddesses?" asked Nico with a frown.
"Not to some since," she looked away uncomfortable. "Hephaestus tried to seduce me centuries ago and well, that's how King Erichthonius of Athens was born."
"Wait, you, and Hephaestus had a baby together?" spoke Percy in surprise.
"More like his semen hit my thigh, I wiped it away with a scrap of wool and flung it to the earth after Hephaestus was overcome with lust." She shivered. "That's why I'm here, to tell you the pros and cons of having a relationship."
"Wait, if there are good sides to it, then why does it sound like you hated the very idea?" asked Percy.
"It's not that I hate it," Athena sighed. "But given that some of your….siblings were horn dogs, I had to make sure to teach you before that line is crossed."
"Alright, what are the cons?"
"That's simple," she said. "Being rude, unfaithful, neglecting them, getting them pregnant without consent, same goes with not using protection, and think about this, if the relation is deteriorating, what would you do? Abandon her or repair the relationship?"
"I'd try to repair it as best as I could, which might be tricky considering I've never really had a girlfriend."
Athena smiled at that. "Good, at least one of Poseidon's children has better consent towards women." She then frowned. "Unlike your brothers…."
"And pros?"
"Having a loving person that cares for you, someone that understands you for you, and…." She blushed. "Some one to….what was the term, oh yes, 'bump uglies'."
Both of them blushed while idly looking each other in the eye.
"Also," Athena chuckled. "I personally find this coupling better than you and my daughter. Thus, I will be the godmother of any children made from this consummation."
"Jumping ahead aren't we?" he chuckled nervously.
"Nope." She said pointing to Nico. "But Nico wants your children." And with that she changed back into an owl and flew out the window….but not before leaving a gift on Nico's head aka condoms. 'Hmm, perhaps I should visit Hephaestus on the way.'
"Nico?" Percy blushed before getting kissed on the lips.
-next morning-
As morning came a dove flew up to the door of Percy's cabin before said bird changed into a smiling Aphrodite.
"Now, let's see how the little love birds are doing."
She opened the door and saw both Percy and Nico, naked. With their bodies covered in cum, seawater, burnt into the wall shadows, and two or three spirits of deceased harem dancers, who were also sleeping on the ground next to the two sleeping demigods.
'...wow…' she walked over and looked at the mess. 'They might need a few cleaners if they get into the REAL kinky stuff, but that can wait when they're older.'
She was about to move out the door when she saw something on the ground. She bent down and picked it up revealing it to be….a statue of her covered in juices. More specifically, Nico's juices. 'Oh, that's it.'
She turned to Nico and gave her one last curse, one that will cause her…. 'To have a mountain of kids in just two months. Hope you like it, child of Hades.' She then flashed out of the cabin and back to Olympus where...she found the gods and goddess, minus Hades and Poseidon, betting? "What's going on?"
"We're placing bets on whether or not Hades will approve his own daughter….son….well you know, dating his nephew." spoke up Hermes.
"And whether or not that Poseidon approves of the relation." Hera spoke up. "And fifty drachma on both demigods having their father's approval."
"Sixty on Hades toasting Percy alive." spoke Apollo. "Wouldn't want to get on his bad side."
"Seventy on approval." Both ….Ares and Zeus said.
"What?" Artemis said confused while betting on the approval. "I thought you two would more than likely bet on Percy Jackson meeting his demise."
"Yes but it's better to see the spawns have reprieve from fighting." Ares surprisingly said with Zeus nodding in agreement.
"Ten thousand on approval!" Demeter called out while placing her golden scythe on the table. "And my symbol of power as well."
"Woah, you must be confident." remarked Apollo.
"Of course." She grinned. "Even if my step-granddaughter isn't a child of Kore, she has my full approval along with her step-mother."
Soon the two brothers appeared and were confused by the large crowd and board behind them.
"What's going on?" Hades asked while eyeing Demeter's scythe with dread. Since that weapon was used to threaten him at his wedding centuries ago. 'I hate that thing.'
"Just a little bet." grinned Hermes with a chuckle.
"About?" Poseidon asked before seeing his son's name on the board along with Hades' child. "Hermes. Did you start a betting circle again, after seeing how long it would take the Hecatonchires to unbind Zeus from those imperial gold chains?!"
"Don't worry, this bet is pretty short sadly. It all depends on both you of course."
"And?" Both asked with annoyed looks. "What is it Hermes?"
"Your kids got together and this is on whether or not you will approve or split them up."
"Especially since they just had sex." Aphrodite spoke up. "And wow, it was, what was it called, ha! Yes it was an unseen event of total awesomeness full of seawater, burnt shadows, some dead harem dancers and cum. Lots of it too."
Poseidon and Hades felt their jaws drop hearing that.
"Oh and they also did it after Athena came by." She said pointing to the goddess in question. "And yes they used condoms….for the first few rounds." 'And my statue too….ok let's see what happens in three, two, one.'
"WHAT?!"
"And Nico's pregnant." Aphrodite lied. 'It's half true, in two months she's going to be giving birth to about….one hundred kids or more.'
This got the two god really pissed off but not at their children or themselves but… "APHRODITE!"
"What?" she spoke holding her hands up. "I didn't do a thing."
Both didn't listen as they started to chase the goddess of love around the room in rage.
"GET BACK HERE!"
"LET ME GIVE YOU A HUG OF PAIN!"
"AAAHHH!"