Chapter 14: Confessions of Doubt

Disclaimer: I do not own any of these characters

Italics= SpongeBob's thoughts

Underlined= Sandy's thoughts

It was two hours before Sandy finally awoke from her sleep, dried tears covered her cheeks and memories of their previous conversation clouded her thoughts. It took her a moment to realize she was still nestled in the sponges arms, his chest rising and falling gently with each breath. Judging by the speed of his breath, Sandy was able to deduce that said sponge was currently sleeping. Craning her neck slightly to look up at him, she was met with a picture of his serene features that literally took her breath away.

The sun had left some time ago and the moon now spilled in through the opened window and splashed onto SpongeBob's face, highlighting the freckles sprinkling his cheeks. Long, gorgeous eyelashes fanned out beneath resting eyes; his lips slightly parted, the edges curling up in a smaller version of his signature smile.

Remembering that she did indeed need oxygen to live, Sandy sucked in a small breath of air and resumed breathing as she relaxed into his body once more. He looked so peaceful, and, dare she think it, beautiful in the moon light. This is probably the time when he's calmest, what with his hyperactive personality and all… It was so different to see such a lively person in such a calm position; it was almost like he was sharing a secret with her. It was at that moment, that she felt truly thankful for having him in her life.

He was a constant and shining light in her otherwise mildly boring world; she couldn't help but smile at the trueness of her thoughts. How in the world did she win the affection of such an amazing person? And how did the small critter come to have such great importance to her? I guess it's because I can always rely on him to have my back. And it was true; here he was, holding her in his arms, giving her his strength, she'd never met another like him. And I never will… The thought appeared so out of the blue that it actually caught her off guard; was it true?

The squirrel shifted her neck so her head was once again resting against the sponges chest, but in doing so, the small action seemed to have woken him up. His mind still hazy from sleep, SpongeBob looked down through his lashes at the girl in his arms. Tightening his hold on her in a small squeeze, he lifted a hand to stifle the yawn that escaped his mouth. Hearing the small noise from above her, Sandy lifted herself from his chest enough to look up at him. Blue irises peered down at brown and he smiled just enough to send his silent message.

"Morning…" He peered down at her, the last little wisps of sleep fading from his mind. His eyes seemed to constantly replay the promises he had made to her last night, as if to re-enforce that he well and truly meant them. But, she had no doubts.

"It's evenin" silly." Trying to reassure him that she was feeling better, she let a miniscule smile slip onto her lips; but it lacked her usual spark.

Seeing that she was still feeling a little on edge, SpongeBob's hand found Sandy's smaller one and held it lovingly.

"Did you wanna -"

"Talk about it? Um," she glanced down at their joined hands before looking back up into his eyes and lacing their fingers together," y-yeah, I guess I should." Sandy took a deep breath, steadied her mind and tried to calm her slowly increasing heart rate.

"Where was I up to?" She whispered quietly, though she did not know why.

"He, uh, closed the door after you went into your room…" He replied just as quietly, as if he spoke any louder, Sandy would break.

"Oh, yeah…Uh, w-well. After he closed the door, he turned and gave me this…this…Look, I was completely unprepared for it." She spoke in whispers, the memories painful enough, but not for the reasons some would assume from what she had said in their previous conversation.

"It was this look of utter and complete…love."

SpongeBob was unprepared for this, his eyes widening slightly at the word. He had been expecting something worse, but was extremely relieved to hear she had not been physically harmed or…defiled.

"He turned to me and started explaning how he had fallen in love with me and had been waiting for the right moment to confess without being interrupted," that explains the locked door," and well…asked me out on a d-date…"

Sandy was quiet a moment, the wound of her memories having opened more and the feelings of that moment flooding her heart. It had once been a happy memory, one she looked upon fondly. But…things changed.

"And…"

"And what?"

"Did you say yes?" SpongeBob could tell that the confession obviously wasn't the cause of Sandy's pain, but part of him hoped that she hadn't accepted his offer on a date.

"…um, y-yeah." Sandy took another deep breath, her voice had started to waver from her the emotions flooding her heart. A small jolt of pain had hit her gut when she saw SpongeBob's face harden at both her previous statement and hearing that He had confessed.

"We, uh, went on a date and things were going pretty well. I mean, we were dating for a few weeks, then it turned into months and I thought to myself ' I think I actually love him.' So, I planed to tell him when he next came over to my house." Sandy had to stop for a second, tears started to pool in her eyes and her breaths came shakily and uneven. This memory having been the most painful to remember out of all; but it felt good talking to someone about it…

Seeing her pain, the young man pulled the mammal back into his arms and hugged her close to him. She didn't collapse and break down like earlier, much to his relief, but he did feel her shaky breathing and his shirt becoming slightly damp from her tears. This was closer to the normal Sandy, but he couldn't wait till she was able to be herself again 100% He really couldn't express how much pain he was feeling from seeing her so unlike herself.

Finally calming down enough, Sandy trusted her voice and continued.

"He came over with some friends, I had decided that day, was the day, I would tell him I loved him. So I went to go get us some drinks and prepare myself while he said goodbye to his friends. What I didn't prepare myself for was what happened next. As I was coming back into the living room, I heard him and his friends talking in hushed whispers. From what I over heard, he was only dating me to prove to his friends that he could get any girl he wanted, including myself… I was his…Trophy." She spat the last part out, both pain and anger filling her voice with venom.

"None of it was real SpongeBob; he never loved me…" After the last words left her lips, the chasm in her heart grew bigger, pain and anger boiling up into her brain and causing her to not just break down, but shut down completely. The tears fell silently from her eyes and the only proof she was still alive was the short quick intakes of air and the tremors that wracked her body. She had let herself fall completely into SpongeBob's hold, as he felt like the only thing that could hold her together right now.

The young man held her smaller frame tightly and rubbed his hand in small comforting circles on her back. He made hushed calming noises and whispered reassurances into her ear. And that is how they slept that evening, wrapped in each others arms. Holding each other together; mending a broken heart.

And hoping for things to be all right, just like he promised…

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A/N:

Hey Babes!

Thanks so much for waiting, I know it was a long wait but it was well worth it since this may be the longest chapter I've written so far! But the next chapter should be about double this ones length (hopefully!) The next chapter should explain some of the missing blanks in this chapter, so don't worry! I know it seemed like I would never update, and to be honest, I did at some point forget about writing this chapter; so when I came back to finish it, I had to delete what I had written and start again!

If I do take too long to update, I highly encourage you to either PM me or review reminding me to write the next chapter and post it! Also, WE'VE HIT OVER 12,000 VIEWS! WHOOOOOO! Also, 40 REVIEWS! Please review when you can as it keeps me motivated and concentrated on writing and will help me to update more and faster!

I love you all my diligent readers!

~ Goldenflash100 XD

P.S I actually plan on going back to the start of my story and rewriting the first 5 or so chapters as I'm really unhappy with how they sound. They're really disjointed and there's some parts that don't really make any sense. I'll post a notice when I rewritten and posted the new