Christian's POV
I don't usually work on Saturdays, but I need to spend some time in my study responding to emails and putting a business plan together for an upcoming project on the east coast. I've been in here for an hour and I am nearly finished, but I stop when Phoebe knocks on the door. I allow her to come in even though I know I am going to dread this conversation. She came to me yesterday and told me about a road trip that she'd like to take with Trevor and his friends. I know she is growing up, but I don't feel comfortable allowing her to travel with her boyfriend for weeks, especially when they don't have a plan for where they will travel. I also do not find it appropriate for her to take a trip with a boy she's been dating for just four months.
I stop what I'm doing and watch her sit in one of the chairs. She looks like she is trying to hide the fact that she is nervous about a presentation that she's about to give. I have to wonder if she has rehearsed this conversation. This isn't right. I want her to be at ease when she talks to me. I'm her father, not some high school teacher that grades her papers. I offer her a smile, but she doesn't return it.
"What can I do for your, Peanut?" There, that did it. She breaks eye contact with me and lets out a sigh. I can't help the smirk that crosses my face. Calling her Peanut just has this effect on her. She stops being my teenaged daughter and becomes my little girl again.
"Dad, stop. This is a serious matter" she whines. I don't like when she whines, but I certainly have given her good reason to.
"I apologize. What would you like to talk about?"
"The road trip"
"No" I dismiss it right away. I don't want part two of last night's argument. It got so bad that we wound up shouting at each other. I took her cell phone away and sent her to her room for the tone she'd used with me.
"Dad" she whines again, and I can't help but scowl at her.
"The answer is no. I'm sorry Phoebe, but I don't want you going on a road trip at your age."
"Dad, all of the kids that are going are my age. And you know Trevor. You can meet his friends too if you want."
"No, Phoebe" I say raising my voice, and now she is scowling at me.
"What are you afraid of?" she challenges me. Does she want the list? I shake my head and run my hand through my hair. I lower my voice to answer her.
"You are not old enough to be on your own. A lot of bad things can happen that you are not prepared to deal with. Plus, you have the paparazzi out there that will follow you around and ensure that your picture will be on the cover of every tabloid on every newsstand. And once it is out there that Phoebe Grey is out there gallivanting, you'll have all the creeps and low lifes just eager to kidnap you for ransom and do god knows what to you. There are bad people out there, Phoebe, disgusting people that would like nothing more than to hurt a young girl like you and to hurt our family simply because we are wealthy. I'm sorry, Phoebe, but you are way too young and ill prepared to be out there on your own."
I watch her squirm in her seat. Good, maybe now she will let this go. I watch her stand and walk toward the door of my study. Before she leaves she turns to me. "It's nice to know you have that much faith in me."
"Christ, Phoebe!" I stand and my sudden movement knocks my chair into the cabinet behind me, I am so mad. "This has nothing to do with my faith in you. I have a lot of faith in you. It is what is out there that scares me." I point in the other direction for emphasis. She still looks hurt as she leaves my study, and all I can do is sink down in my chair and run both hands through my hair. That girl becomes more and more challenging every day. She is so much like her mother was when I met her, very innocent yet very headstrong. I know she doesn't like it, but I need to protect her.
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I walk into the kitchen and see my wife at the sink. I surprise her when I take her in my arms and find her lips with mine. It takes her a few seconds, but she responds, and boy does she feel good. I don't stop, and neither does she. She allows me to lose myself in her for a minute or two before we both separate and work to catch our breaths. She starts to giggle. God, how I love that sound. I can't help but grin at her. I kiss her forehead and then glance over at the breakfast bar. Natalie is sitting in her booster seat eating cheerios, completely oblivious to what her mother and I are doing. This time I let out a light giggle.
"How's she doing?" I am referring to her rash. I feel so damn guilty about that. I reach up and tuck a strand of Ana's hair behind her ear and wait for her to respond.
"She's fine, Christian. The rash isn't even that bad. And she didn't put up a fuss when I changed her this morning."
I feel slightly relieved at that. "You think I overreacted?"
She leans up on her tippy toes so that our faces are almost level, and brushes her nose against mine, teasing me. "Don't you always?"
I feel the urge to slap her bottom, but I suppress the urge since Natalie is in the room. I don't want her to see that and start asking questions. Instead I lean in close to her ear and whisper "only where my wife and kids are concerned, Mrs Grey"
I feel her slightly shiver, and I can't help but grin at the fact that the sound of my voice just does things to her. I put distance between us and walk over to the breakfast bar to join my baby girl.
"Daddy!" she smiles. She's happy to see me. I lean down and kiss her forehead, and she reaches her arms up for a hug. I can never resist this type of affection from my kids, so I sit in a chair next to her and I wrap my arms around her.
"Hi, Sweet Pea. Daddy's very happy to see you."
Ana brings two plates to the table with omelets and sits on the stool next to me. The three of us enjoy breakfast together, but someone is missing. "Did you talk to Phoebe this morning?" I ask my wife.
Ana blots her lips with her napkin before she answers. "Yes, I did. She came and talked to me while I was dressing Natalie. She's really focused on this road trip."
I stop eating and I scowl, but I really don't mean to. I just really hate this idea and I wish Phoebe wouldn't press the issue so strongly. Usually when I tell her no about something, she walks away and pouts since she knows I don't like pouting. But then she would let it go and move onto something else. This is different. She really wants this, so much that she went as far as engaging in a shouting match with me. I put my fork down and rub my napkin between my hands, even though my hands are not greasy or dirty. "I told her no, Ana. I've told her twice now. Why won't she let this go?"
Ana brings her hand up and rubs my back. "This is something that she really wants. She's not seeing the big picture of how dangerous this could be. The only bad she's seen was with Jay and Braxton. And that's nothing compared to what can happen to her out there." I grimace when she brings up Jay and Braxton, but I let her continue. "We've kept her safe and sheltered all of her life. We've monitored everything she's read or seen on television and in movies. We kept all things that are bad away from her. So, she's completely oblivious to what's really out there, and just how dangerous the real world can be."
I continue to scowl. "Are you saying we shouldn't have done that? Should we have given her a taste of the real world and all of the scum that is in it so that she wouldn't go looking for trouble? I know, maybe we should tell her about the time Jack Hyde kidnapped you and Mia, or when Leila held a gun to you…"
"Christian please" she interrupts me, but I keep going.
"…. or when one of my ex-employees tried to kidnap her when she was a baby."
"Christian" she shouts, and then she looks over at Natalie. Natalie looks up at me and looks a bit frightened but keeps eating her cheerios. I reach over and gently run my hand through her hair.
"I'm sorry Baby" I say to our little girl gently. "Mommy and Daddy didn't mean to shout." I look at my distraught wife and a wave of guilt washes over me again. She doesn't need this, nor does she deserve it. She's pregnant, which is causing enough stress for her right now. "I'm sorry" I mouth to her softly. I reach over and place my hand on top of hers. "I'm sorry, that was harsh. I'm just…. I don't want her to do this. And I need her to see that it is not just me being mean, but it's me trying to protect her. How do I make her see that?"
She sighs and looks down at our hands, and I know that we will have a challenge on our hands. I don't want Phoebe to be mad at me, but I can't give into this. I look over at Natalie and she has finished her cheerios.
"All done" she says with so much pride I can't help but smile at her.
"Good girl. Would you like some chocolate milk?" She nods and pushes her bowl away. I look over at my wife and see that she is still distraught. Fuck! I should not have brought up all of the bad shit from our past. I know she is remembering something, and not a good something. I let out a sigh. "I'll get it." I stand and kiss Ana's head before I move to the refrigerator for the milk and chocolate. I am just screwing up left and right lately. I can't wait for Teddy to come home from college. He and Rebecca had decided to stay at Harvard a few extra weeks for a summer course. I love my three girls but I can certainly use the presence of my male son to level things out a bit more. Maybe he can help get Phoebe's mind off this road trip, or at least help me talk some sense into her.
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Phoebe walks into her room and finds her cell phone sitting on her dresser. When did Dad put this here? She picks it up and looks at it for a moment, but then puts it down again to fire up her laptop. She wants to talk to Teddy, but he's not on line. She picks up her cell again and sends him a text, asking him if he has time to skype. She waits for a few minutes for him to respond, but he doesn't. She lets out a long annoyed sigh, but then notices that he is on line. She sees his face appear on her screen and she has to work hard to keep her emotions in check. She misses him, especially now since she is fighting with her father. Teddy is always so good at helping her when she and their father don't see eye to eye.
"What's wrong Phoebs?" he asks her. He immediately knows that something is wrong when he sees her face.
Phoebe can no longer stop the tears from falling. She quickly wipes them away so that she can talk to her brother. "Dad and I are fighting" she manages to say.
"About what?"
"He is so overprotective, Teddy. He won't let me do anything. I feel so trapped in this house sometimes, like I'm missing out on some great things because he fears for my safety."
Teddy gives her a moment to calm down before he speaks. "He loves us, Phoebs. I know he seems over the top sometimes, but he just wants to make sure we are safe." Phoebe takes a few breaths to calm herself, and she looks down and away from the screen. "How did this fight start?"
Phoebe looks up at the ceiling and takes in a long breath. "I um, asked him if I could take a road trip with Trevor."
"And you honestly believed he would say yes?"
Is he laughing at me? "Teddy, please. I don't need this right now. This is something that I really want. It's something that I need to do." She says the last part softly, but Teddy heard her.
"You're not thinking of taking off, are you?" Phoebe looks away from him again and thinks about it. "Phoebe, no. Please don't do this. You know this would kill him."
"Teddy, I feel suffocated in this house. Mom and Dad and security constantly watching me, I can't even go on a date with Trevor without Sawyer tagging along. I don't want to wait until college to have the freedom that you have."
Teddy laughs this time, and Phoebe gets annoyed. "I don't have that much freedom. Ryan follows me everywhere. Rebecca and I have just gotten used to it."
"How do you get used to a guy watching you kiss your girlfriend, like you and Rebecca are doing something wrong?"
Teddy is able to contain his laughter and tries to help his sister. "You need to forget that Sawyer is there when you are kissing Trevor. He's not there to break Trevor's kneecaps, unless Trevor hurts you. He's there to keep all of the other creeps away from you." Phoebe nods and looks down again. She was hoping Teddy would support her decision to take a road trip, but this conversation is not going in that direction. "What are you going to do, Phoebe?"
"I'm going to allow this house to swallow me whole."
"Phoebe" he lightly scolds.
"I'm going to meet with Trevor today, let him know that this isn't a good idea."
Teddy smiles, hoping that Phoebe will return the smile. But she doesn't. "Phoebe, you don't see it now, but maybe someday you will. Dad just loves us so much. It is not his wish to have us miss out on things, just the things that will put us in danger."
"Sometimes I think he loves us a little too much" she says softly.
"Teddy looks away from his laptop and then looks back at his sister. "Phoebs, I have to go. When I come home next week, we'll spend the entire day together, okay?"
"Okay. Thanks Teddy"
Phoebe closes her laptop and lets out a long sigh. She looks over and stares at a notepad that she keeps on her desk. She takes some time to look around her room, and her eyes find the notepad again. She picks it up, walks over to her bed and sits down, still staring at it. She begins to write what comes to mind.
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Christian takes Natalie to her room around two in the afternoon and tells her that she needs to take a nap. He is pleased when she doesn't put up a fight like she usually does on the weekend. It is always difficult to pull her away from her toys for naptime, but he knows it is necessary if he wants his baby girl to be in a happy mood for the rest of the day. He tucks her in and makes sure she has her favorite stuffed animal, a soft teddy bear that Teddy had given her before he had to move away for college. She closes her eyes and he gently kisses her forehead before he leaves the room.
Once he's in the hallway he is met with his distraught wife. "What's wrong, Baby? Did you talk to Phoebe?"
Ana doesn't answer, but she hands him a note that Phoebe had left for them. He looks at his wife and then down at the letter that is in Phoebe's hand writing.
Dear Mom and Dad,
You have taught me so many things that I will carry
with me forever. But one thing you haven't
taught me is to be self-sufficient. We've
always had things done for us. We've always had security
look out for us and keep us safe. I never had to worry about where my next
meal was coming from or where I was going to sleep. You've made it so
the only thing I had to concentrate on was my education.
I love you so much, please don't ever doubt that. I
hate going against your wishes, but I had to do this,
for me. I have always had this bad anxiety about
being away from you. Even spending one night away from
you was torture. But next year, I will be going to college.
I haven't decided where I will be studying, but I know
where ever that is, it will require me to be away from you.
I need to know that I can do that. This is the only way
I will know if I can live successfully at a four year college,
or if I will need to live with my parents and attend
community college. This isn't just a way of being with
my boyfriend, it's not about that. But I will be with Trevor
and we will take care of each other on this road trip. I trust him,
but I am not naïve. I would never do something that I don't want
to do. I wish you would give me more credit than that.
I will be home in a few weeks, and I will make contact to let
you know that I am okay. Please don't try to track me
down. I don't want that. I want you to trust me and
trust that I can do this. Please? I love you so much. And I
want you to be proud of me. Please don't be mad.
Love, Phoebe Grace Grey